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  • The answer hasn't changed, Silver. You seriously don't need to get permission to ask a question, so you can just ask a question when you have one.
    To be honest, it's sort of hard to tell. I do agree with the people on the thread that it feels like the explanations you're offering up for how Palkia was never previously taught how to use her powers/how she's supposed to go about learning them/et cetera are incredibly weak. It's pretty cool that you want to explore a character's growth and have one eventually become confident and self-reliant, but the problem is that instead of answering all the questions that people pose about how certain things don't entirely make sense, you tend to come up with more situations full of points that don't entirely make sense. It also doesn't really help that it's always the girl who needs to gain confidence and rely on someone else('s powers) and never the guy. I mean, you never did answer the question of why Palkia, to whom controlling space should be as natural and basic as walking/talking/eating for a human, needs to use Dialga's time-control powers because none of her family ever bothered teaching her those things.

    In other words, in terms of description, spelling, and word choice, sure, but in terms of content... you could still use a bit of work.

    I guess the best piece of advice I can offer in that regard is simply to try thinking of all the possible questions a person can ask about a situation and try to answer them directly. For example, if you ask yourself, "why doesn't Palkia know how to use her powers," don't answer "because no one ever taught her." You might be able to respond with, "in this world, Pokémon don't know how to use their powers at first, but they need to undergo special training to do so," but that's only one idea. And even then, you'd have to answer the question of, "So why didn't any other Palkia bother to train her?"

    Does that make a bit more sense?
    And I know i dont have to get people to like be but considering that I've been called sexist so many times, even though I wasn't, I kinda felt like I had to work a bit harder to prove to everyone that I'm not that.
    Lemme see if I can explain this a little more simply. Basically, if you believe that boys are naturally better than girls -- even if you think it's true and don't realize it's wrong -- it's actually still sexist because all sexist means is "genders aren't equal." The best way to convince people that you're not like that is, simply, to show genders be equal. So, yeah, all those times you said that you thought not being sexist = badass female? Not true, really. The whole point is that you create well-developed characters regardless of gender. However, your cast as we see it makes it look like the boys are always better than the girls because it's the boys who are always competent and knights in shining armor while the girls tend to be damsels or disabled, which is why people keep calling you sexist. If you had a mix of characters (both girls and boys who need to gain confidence as well as both girls and boys who were knights in shining armor), then people wouldn't be so quick to call you that.

    And that's pretty much it, really. The whole point is that while you can make all kinds of characters, in the end, you've got to make sure you treat boys the same way as you treat girls and emphasize that there's really no difference between the two. Does that make any sense?

    Also, as a side tip, but I'll have to agree with the others. If you make a ton of threads trying to get advice on every little aspect of an idea, it might be a good idea to hold off on that idea until you develop it on your own a bit more. Or get a beta-reader.
    Er, probably not. You may as well report the post to a mod of that section, or an SMod and see what they say on the matter. That sounds pretty bad. You can also report people who call you names and stuff.
    Now I want to ask someone to put PG-10 in the title and omit the writing in the brackets.
    Done it for you. But given it's easy for stuff like that to be missd you can just PM/VM a mod for thread title changes.
    So you mean you'd like me to review your fic? I'm not sure if I'd be able to at the moment.
    You don't have to ask for permission to ask me a question. As I told you in the past, please just go ahead ask the question. :>
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