-Attention SPPf, attention SPPf:The remix of High Touch still sucks.
-I guess we're supposed to care about the recurring Twinleaf residents by now, since they ARE recurring?
-James is once again *****d off by Jessie...I mean, once again unwillingly thrust into some scheme by his "friends."
-Johanna seems suspicious...but then she says something about TV(presumably "oh, people always look so different on TV than they do in real life", although I don't speak moon languages with any sort of authority)
-You have to wonder why people drive cars in the Pokemon world when they have animals that could probably get them there just as quickly by running really, really, really fast or by flying.
-Oak goes senile and wanders off into the wildnerness to die, cold and alone.
-Ash&Co show up, but seem to be more worried about the lecture* Oak has to give than about him deciding that NOW was the best time to wander off to look at wild Pokemon(instead of, you know, after his lecture*?).
*Oak may not actually be giving a lecture but I assume you're not reading these bulletpoints expecting a 100% correct summary by someone who's fluent in Japanese
-James unsuccessfuly tries to escape from his impending doom. Remind me again what the point of TR's scheme is this time? Because I honestly have no idea.
-A boring Poliwhirl hops into some boring water and Boringfessor Oak makes up a boring poem that nobody cares about because his poems are always a boring waste of time.
-Hey look, it's POLITICALLY INCORRECT INSULT ABOUT A SYNDROME THAT BEGINS WITH A "D" Frog!
-POLITICALLY INCORRECT INSULT ABOUT A SYNDROME THAT BEGINS WITH A "D" Frog stares vacantly at Senile Old Ma...er...Oak for a moment, before summoning a couple of POLITICALLY INCORRECT INSULT ABOUT A SYNDROME THAT BEGINS WITH A "D" Sire.
-I have to say, this is the first time I've seen tall grass...REALLY be tall grass.
-The INSULT ABOUT A SYNDROME THAT BEGINS WITH A "D" Sire carry off Oak. Oak takes his new fate as a human sacrifice rather optimistically.
-James cleverly tries to get out of speaking by faking a heart attack!
-When did Croagunk get out of its Pokeball? WHO CARES, CROAGUNK IS AWESOME.
-Croagunk, Piplup, and Pikachu marching in a single file line...the Mascot Parade was TODAY? How did I forget to mark that on my calendar?!
-Croagunk apparently can tell when mud's about to get deep. Goddamn it, why can't they do that in the games?
-There was an honest-to-god "wah wah wah waaaaaaaaah" music cue after Croagunk pulled Piplup out of the mud. That's so corny, and yet so incredible.
-James' "fake a heart attack plan" might have worked better if he collapsed or something. Luckily, Jessie and Meowth are underneath the floorboards, ready to save the day!
-James starts well...then breaks into the TR motto! Or so I thought, but he's actually adapting to sound like stuff Oak would talk about.
-I love how everyone explains away the differences between Fake Oak and Actual Oak by "everything's different on TV, eh?"
-Ooooh, this was a ploy to get the audience to show off their Pokeballs so that...TR can steal them more easily somehow.
-The SYNDROME THAT BEGINS WITH A "D" trio of Pokemon comes out of a cave...without Oak in tow! Obviously AshNCo is too late to save Oak, but at least the volcano god has been appeased for another year.
-Blah blah generic dramtic trading of blows followed by a minute of Croagunk and Politoed doing nothing before Politoed collapses.
-Too bad the SYNDROME THAT BEGINS WITH A "D" FOLLOWED BY AN "O" Sire are none too pleased about that.
-Oh wait, AshNco are allowed into the cave anyway.
-A Lombre's not feeling well. OF COURSE THAT's WHY OAK WAS KIDNAPPED POKEMON ONLY DO BAD THINGS TO HELP OUT ONE OF THEIR FRIENDS IN NEED.
-Oak is clearly senile, since he's trying to cure Lombre's illness by making funny faces at it.
-Oak ends up making Lombre feel better by giving it the littlest water stone that ever was so it can evolve into Ludicolo, the Other Mexican Sterotype Pokemon.
-Blah blah the gang gets to the lecture hall and OH MY GOD THERE ARE TWO OAKS AND SOMEHOW JAMES ISN'T IMMEDIATELY SWARMED BY AN ANGRY MOB.
-Some kid volunteers to find out who the real oak is because only the real oak would know (hell if I know what he's talking about) about his TYRANITAR. Kid's packing HEAT!
-James gets blasted off, Oak demonstrates that he's the perfect combo of senile and nerves of steel by showing no fear when Tyranitar raises its foot over him.
-Aw, T-tar had a thorn in its foot. How delightfully cliche.
Ep needed more Croagunk, more Tyranitar, and more of Oak being a senile old man. I'm not sure how it managed to NOT have enough of these things, but that's how it was.
Rescue Professor Oak! Politoed VS Croagunk!!
