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Abstinence in Middle School

Green_Man

Banned
Being educated on sex does not mean you're going to go out and have sex with the first person you see. Being educated means that when you do make the decision to have sex, you'll be prepared on how to be protected and knowledgeable about the consequences if said protection should fail. There's nothing wrong with teaching kids about safe sex.

Exactly. For someone so cute your actually kind of smart.
 

CSolarstorm

New spicy version
Well on the school's side...it's really a matter of P.O.V whether they're going to teach abstinence or safe sex. Their job is really to teach the mandated subjects. This is still an issue that the nation is divided on and they may not have a choice given their target area. In any case, if you want to seek education on safe sex, there are a plethora of places to choose from nowadays - preferably not from a peer, but you have access to the internet.

But I would like to point out, although some fundamentalists have a tendency to say it in a way that sounds domineering and judgemental, one of the things about sex is discipline - not self-loathing or starving yourself obviously, but I mean, you could wait until high school, at least.

And even that sounds strange to me.
 

the jman

Ak47 I choose you!
Middle school? That's barely puberty...

And is Exactly why they need to know this stuff now so they're scared enough not to have sex...
 

Pesky Persian

Caffeine Queen
And is Exactly why they need to know this stuff now so they're scared enough not to have sex...

While I agree that kids should definitely be taught this subject at this age, I have to disagree with this post. If you're actually being serious, that is.

I don't think it's fair to "scare" kids into not having sex. It's as unhelpful as abstinence-only education. Yes, the fear of pregnancy and infection could be a deterrent if they're taught those things, but fear shouldn't be the goal. It would only have a negative impact on the way they look at sex in the future and that's not healthy. Sex shouldn't be something taboo. It's not something that should be taught as "gross" or "wrong" or "bad" in any way. Can it have negative consequences? Absolutely, but I don't feel those should be the focus of sex education. Protected sex with a trusted partner at the right age (i.e. when a person is not only physically ready, but emotionally and psychologically as well) is natural, healthy, and well... Fun.
 

the jman

Ak47 I choose you!
While I agree that kids should definitely be taught this subject at this age, I have to disagree with this post. If you're actually being serious, that is.

I don't think it's fair to "scare" kids into not having sex. It's as unhelpful as abstinence-only education. Yes, the fear of pregnancy and infection could be a deterrent if they're taught those things, but fear shouldn't be the goal. It would only have a negative impact on the way they look at sex in the future and that's not healthy. Sex shouldn't be something taboo. It's not something that should be taught as "gross" or "wrong" or "bad" in any way. Can it have negative consequences? Absolutely, but I don't feel those should be the focus of sex education. Protected sex with a trusted partner at the right age (i.e. when a person is not only physically ready, but emotionally and psychologically as well) is natural, healthy, and well... Fun.

Well, your very right and thats not something all debaters will have the balls to admit. However, I must Digress, if I see a boy look at one of my sisters im going to shoot him. Better they're scared from sex now than to face a overbearing brothers gun
 

Pesky Persian

Caffeine Queen
Well, your very right and thats not something all debaters will have the balls to admit. However, I must Digress, if I see a boy look at one of my sisters im going to shoot him. Better they're scared from sex now than to face a overbearing brothers gun

As a brother, it's only normal to be protective of your sisters. Scare all the horny little preteens you want. As long as you're not an educator/a parent trying to scare children into not ever having sex, it's cool. XD
 

ChedWick

Well-Known Member
Well, your very right and thats not something all debaters will have the balls to admit. However, I must Digress, if I see a boy look at one of my sisters im going to shoot him. Better they're scared from sex now than to face a overbearing brothers gun

That's not being very Godly jman. Scare tactics for things like sex are a really poor way to get a message across in cases like this.
 

McNugget

The Bassist
While I agree that kids should definitely be taught this subject at this age, I have to disagree with this post. If you're actually being serious, that is.

I don't think it's fair to "scare" kids into not having sex. It's as unhelpful as abstinence-only education. Yes, the fear of pregnancy and infection could be a deterrent if they're taught those things, but fear shouldn't be the goal. It would only have a negative impact on the way they look at sex in the future and that's not healthy. Sex shouldn't be something taboo. It's not something that should be taught as "gross" or "wrong" or "bad" in any way. Can it have negative consequences? Absolutely, but I don't feel those should be the focus of sex education. Protected sex with a trusted partner at the right age (i.e. when a person is not only physically ready, but emotionally and psychologically as well) is natural, healthy, and well... Fun.
^ And well... Fun. <- Made my day :p
Anyway what's wrong with that school? It sounds like they are scaring kids out of sex, when really they SHOULD be teaching the pros AND cons of it. :/
 

Ausgirl

Well-Known Member
These days kids are almost expected to loose their virginity during high school. I blame it on soaps like Neighbours and Home and Away.
 

7 tyranitars

Well-Known Member
abstince made by prudish people and overbearing parents/teachers who want to keep their kids as stupid as posible
 

SwiftSoul

Kinkmeister General
^ love the quote in your sig, 7 :)

For the record, my first sexual act was as a sophomore, but I didn't actually have sex per se until the latter half of my senior year. It wasn't because peer pressure, I was not ashamed to admit I was a virgin, it's just that opportunity knocked and I answered, happily. Sex is beautiful, spiritual, and a fun experience. I don't think that telling kids that it is gross and disgusting is really that good. It's a lie, for one. If sex was seen as less taboo, as something beautiful but risky when not done safely, then people wouldn't be scared of it, or birth control. Teaching kids about options, and then giving access to those options, is the best way to reduce the horrible infection and pregnancy rates. And maybe straight people would take marriage a little more seriously themselves...
 

Lulu_used_SunnyDay

Petal Blizzard
Studies show girls can hit puberty as early as 8 years old.

And therefore studies show how meat filled with hormones is bad for your health! It isn't natural to hit puberty so early. Before the 18th century, the medium age for girls to become able to conceive was 16. Things changed as our lives became more industrialized and artificial. I'm 18 now, and while talking about this stuff with my friends and finding out some of them had their periods at 10 years old, I was shocked. But, back then when I was 14, there was also a girl my age that didn't have hers yet.

Really, people should only start informing CHILDREN in middle school about health and abstinence regarding sex. But to even talk about abstinence to people that age is ridiculous, because they shouldn't even think about having sex so early.

If someone wants to practice abstinence for their own beliefs, it's fine, but that mustn't become a general rule that everyone should follow. Parents and teachers should only recommend people to make their choices wisely.
 

Pesky Persian

Caffeine Queen
And well... Fun. <- Made my day :p
Just being honest. XD

But to even talk about abstinence to people that age is ridiculous, because they shouldn't even think about having sex so early.

But they do. The OP said he's in eighth grade and, unfortunately, it seems kids are having sexual encounters at younger and younger ages. Eighth grade is right on the verge of high school, a time when people are finding their places in society, their values, and a very impressionable time. They're influenced by the media, their peers, their parents, and a whole host of other sources. Abstinence should absolutely be discussed in sexual education, especially to this age group, but it should certainly not be the only thing they learn. Instead of telling kids "You shouldn't be thinking about it" they should be told "Hey, I understand how you're feeling/thinking at this stage in life and here's what you should know..."
 

Ghostie

Unidentified Ghost
I've been going through all these posts, and the the thing that strikes me is:
Where are these kid's parents? I keep on seeing comments on how 'kids should be able to make an informed decision....at 13, kids shouldn't HAVE a choice in the matter! They're NOT GROWN, and they don't have the RIGHT to make that choice yet.

My parents talked with me about sex when I hit 11, and they explained to me all of the reasons (religious, mostly in my case) as to why they wanted me to wait until I was married. They told me about how much better it would be if I waited. I listened to them, and I am SO glad I did...

While I have nothing against teaching kids about safe sex, and about STD's and all that, I don't think that they should be doing that in MIDDLE SCHOOL! That's just crazy. High school isn't much better.

I just think parents aren't strict enough. When I was in middle school, my parents knew what I was doing all the time. Even in high school they did, actually. Sex is for ADULTS, and ADULTS have the right to make a decision about whether to wait or not, not 13 year olds.
 

Pesky Persian

Caffeine Queen
I've been going through all these posts, and the the thing that strikes me is:
Where are these kid's parents? I keep on seeing comments on how 'kids should be able to make an informed decision....at 13, kids shouldn't HAVE a choice in the matter! They're NOT GROWN, and they don't have the RIGHT to make that choice yet.

My parents talked with me about sex when I hit 11, and they explained to me all of the reasons (religious, mostly in my case) as to why they wanted me to wait until I was married. They told me about how much better it would be if I waited. I listened to them, and I am SO glad I did...

While I have nothing against teaching kids about safe sex, and about STD's and all that, I don't think that they should be doing that in MIDDLE SCHOOL! That's just crazy. High school isn't much better.

I just think parents aren't strict enough. When I was in middle school, my parents knew what I was doing all the time. Even in high school they did, actually. Sex is for ADULTS, and ADULTS have the right to make a decision about whether to wait or not, not 13 year olds.

A lot of parents won't teach their kids these things. They're more likely to say "It's bad, don't do it" instead of informing them on how to be safe. Why shouldn't they be taught sex education in middle school and high school? I'd like to see some reasons why it's a bad idea. And people should make their own decisions on sex because it is ultimately an individual's decision, not their parents. Think about the adolescent psyche for a moment. Many young adults are more likely to rebel against what their parents are telling them. Teenagers are going to have sex. Not all of them, but many of them. It's better for them to know how to do so responsibly than to just allow them to throw themselves into those situations without any knowledge of how to be protected or the consequences.
 

ChedWick

Well-Known Member
I've been going through all these posts, and the the thing that strikes me is:
Where are these kid's parents? I keep on seeing comments on how 'kids should be able to make an informed decision....at 13, kids shouldn't HAVE a choice in the matter! They're NOT GROWN, and they don't have the RIGHT to make that choice yet.

I disagree. While I don't think they are mature enough to make a proper decision they most certainly do have that right.

While I have nothing against teaching kids about safe sex, and about STD's and all that, I don't think that they should be doing that in MIDDLE SCHOOL! That's just crazy. High school isn't much better.

Then you are a naive fool. Culture is ever changing and with influences from all forms of media young boys are more interested in sex than ever. This translate a lot of pressure on young girls. Middle school is the perfect time to educate on the matter. Even if they aren't going to be put in the situation to make the decision for many years they are informed enough to make an informed decision and practice safe sex when the time comes.

I just think parents aren't strict enough.

Being too strict can lead to resentment and I'm sure we all know how young teens act when they resent people, especially their parents.
 

CSolarstorm

New spicy version
Honestly I agree with Ghostie and I'm surprised it took this long in the thread for someone to say it. My parents explained sex to me at about ten or eleven as well, in increments. While one of my parents is religious, I wasn't raised in a religious climate.

Believe it or not you don't have to be religious to believe that you should be older to have sex. It's just a matter of well-being. I think in Middle School, that's when abstinence should be the focus, because just developing kids can be the brutal, immature romantic partners out there, and to have sexual activity at that age just sears those regrets in your mind. Sex-Ed can, it doesn't have to, but it logically can wait until High School.
 
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