Advice thread

[intergalactic platypus]

Question:
How do I make a Facbook without it completely being noticed by my parents?
And how can i access it regularly without them knowing? (lolparentalcontrols copies visited website info)

I want a Facebook badly.

First off, how old are you? If you're an older teenager, you could make the argument to them that preventing you from having something as mundane as a Facebook is ridiculous at your age. Otherwise, use a school computer or something

 

[Zenotwapal]

First off, how old are you? If you're an older teenager, you could make the argument to them that preventing you from having something as mundane as a Facebook is ridiculous at your age. Otherwise, use a school computer or something

I'm 15.
Schools block all social sites.

You think I could use a older computer to make one, and access it from that computer only?
And how would I keep this conceiled form my parents effectively?

 

[Wartortle90]

go to tools, in private browsing? they might see you went private, but not what you did?
maybe delete that off the history entirely, er use a different computer?

 

[Cain Nightroad]

You could easily just talk them into that by allowing them to monitor everything that's posted to your "wall." As long as you don't have any extremely inappropriate friends, it's simple to get by. And even if you know someone who acts like an idiot in real life, I know people who act like little angels on Facebook because their parents monitor them.

It's also GREAT for school work, which may be good for your case with your parents, but is also quite truthful. If you forget to write down homework or need to work on a project without driving to another person's house, then all you need to do is communicate over Facebook. You'd be better off using these arguments than trying to conceal a Facebook page, as you'll be in more trouble if you try to hide something from your parents. Besides, it can always be a backup plan; trying the diplomatic method doesn't hurt.

 

[Juputoru]

Don't hide this from your parents as a first resort. If they catch you sneaking behind their backs to go on Facebook they're less likely to listen to your arguments about why you deserve to have one. They're also likely to become even stricter about what you can do on the internet. I know you're a teenager and hiding things from your parents can seem easier than just asking for permission, but doing whatever you want to and dealing with the fallout later is a bad habit to get into.

To actually deal with your problem:
Ask parents if you can have a Facebook. Point out that you're old enough to be afforded a bit more freedom in browsing the internet, that you can ask for help with schoolwork/forgotten notes/whatever more easily if you have one, and that you're not going to do anything dumb to get stalkers or pedophiles on your case. Basically emphasize that you're not an idiot and you're not going to be irresponsible if you get a Facebook. (disclaimer:Argument works best if you're actually not an irresponsible idiot) Also let them monitor your Facebook if they're that worried about it. It sucks, but life is about compromises like that.

If they say yes: Congrats, you have a Facebook. Make sure that your page is set up to prevent everyone and their brother from seeing everything about you.
If they say no: Live without a Facebook. This may sound completely impossible, but it isn't. Really. It's not a big deal, no matter how much you think it is. You'll get over it. If you're stupid enough to go behind your parents' backs after they say no...it wouldn't be anything unusual at your age, but it's still going to bite you in the ass once they catch you. And they will catch you if they're the sort of parents who monitor their kid's internet usage that closely.

 

[Mr. Mudkip]

I'm 15.
Schools block all social sites.

You think I could use a older computer to make one, and access it from that computer only?
And how would I keep this conceiled form my parents effectively?

InPrivate browsing/kick filter *** with ip adresses. (Aka http://66.220.145.11/)
And just make your profile friends only everything.

 

[Sha742]

I'm currently holding a decimal point GPA in my Junior year of High School. I have no ambition to go to college simply because the six years of 7th-12th had been fruitless and drama-wrought enough to turn me off the idea for continuing for four more years. My mum, who had passed away around the time I started high school, had pushed me to excel in academics, and from her I've learned to like searching out different paths of intellectual pursuit; my current field of study being transcendentalism.
After reading the works of Emerson, Thoreau, and less note-worthy writers in the philosophy, the importance of following the set curricula of each year seems to fade, while my antipathy and apathy shines ever clearer.
To sum up the main point of transcendentalism, it is to reject societal norms or laws if they become destructive of your individuality or perceived morality. However, it acknowledges that there will consequences to that, and I am as well.
Despite my 2230, having a .8 GPA will not get me into college. I'm willing to accept that. I can't see anything that college would have to offer me that I can't self-teach myself. The career path I'm seeking doesn't require a college with a prestigious name on the resume; the prerequisite of becoming an author is diligence and ability.

My high school counselor calls me up near-weekly to tell me that I'm wasting my potential, the teachers' time, the State's money, and his patience by sticking to my path. Each time I tell him that I'm staying in class, listening and reading the material, but in terms of doing projects I deem superfluous or homework I call tedious, I hold my effort.

I don't want to paint the wrong picture; I don't sit in class and brood and watch others do what they're told with a smug sense of superiority, I just do something else. In Physics, when we're not doing an experiment, often times I'll just be reading the textbook instead of doing the worksheet.
http://i100.photobucket.com/albums/m8/Sha742_2006/grades.png
That's my Physics Honors progress report.

So I ask you, members of Serebii, what do?

 

[blueguy]

@Sha742... You seem like an intelligent person, so it's a shame you're so lazy. You may be "too smart" for the classes you're taking, but by effectively not trying, you're just going to end up living in your parents' basement for the rest of your life, no matter how bright you may be. The same goes for being an author, if that's what you want to do. My advice is to get over yourself a bit, and just do it. :3

 

[Sha742]

Er, I think you missed a bit of my post. One point being I don't have parents, haha. I'm not 'too smart' for my classes, otherwise I wouldn't attend. I just don't do an occasional assignment because I'm not dependent on a grade. I stick with AP and Honor classes not to get college credit, but to have the opportunity to learn in the compulsory hours.

I want to know why college is imperative, and what people have to say regarding my situation or a way out of it.

 

[facetious]

I want to know why college is imperative, and what people have to say regarding my situation or a way out of it.

You didn't really qualify what you meant by "author." Author of what? Fiction? Scholarly journals? Weblogs?

I'm assuming you meant scholarly journals. You can't write an article/essay for a scholarly journal without a college degree; people who are reading those kinds of journals want to be reassured that what they're reading is credible and from somebody qualified, and I'm sure the journal editors want the same. What would a journal editor prefer to publish? An essay from somebody with a PhD and years of experience in the area of transcendentalism, or somebody with an interest in transcendentalism but without a college degree? It's a no-brainer.

Unfortunately, you need to conform to the system to get anywhere. Having said that, college isn't "imperative;" if you have another means to go about achieving your goals, by all means, do it. You'd be taking the most difficult road possible by doing so, and you'd be fucking yourself over if it turns out that path leads to no where (which it most likely will).

 

[Sha742]

I spose I need to clarify what my scope would be. Fiction, really. Be it by ghost writing (which of course would call for either precedence in writing or earned degrees) or blazing with my own work. I can't see college being able to help me with that any more than a series of Wikipedia articles would be able to. I understand the necessity of secondary school in some fields, but not one that requires both left and right brain strengths.

 

[intergalactic platypus]

Er, I think you missed a bit of my post. One point being I don't have parents, haha. I'm not 'too smart' for my classes, otherwise I wouldn't attend. I just don't do an occasional assignment because I'm not dependent on a grade. I stick with AP and Honor classes not to get college credit, but to have the opportunity to learn in the compulsory hours.

I want to know why college is imperative, and what people have to say regarding my situation or a way out of it.

Think of this realistically. The vast majority of authors are not able to make a living off of their writing alone. Compared to the number of people who want to write, the actual chances of success are pretty low. Without college, you're really gambling with your future. It may seem cool and romantic now to pursue your dreams as a starving artist, but it will not be cool when you can barely pay your rent. My suggestion is go to college, get a desk job or something, and write when you can. Pursue your goals while still being able to live

 

[Zenotwapal]

Don't hide this from your parents as a first resort. If they catch you sneaking behind their backs to go on Facebook they're less likely to listen to your arguments about why you deserve to have one. They're also likely to become even stricter about what you can do on the internet. I know you're a teenager and hiding things from your parents can seem easier than just asking for permission, but doing whatever you want to and dealing with the fallout later is a bad habit to get into.

To actually deal with your problem:
Ask parents if you can have a Facebook. Point out that you're old enough to be afforded a bit more freedom in browsing the internet, that you can ask for help with schoolwork/forgotten notes/whatever more easily if you have one, and that you're not going to do anything dumb to get stalkers or pedophiles on your case. Basically emphasize that you're not an idiot and you're not going to be irresponsible if you get a Facebook. (disclaimer:Argument works best if you're actually not an irresponsible idiot) Also let them monitor your Facebook if they're that worried about it. It sucks, but life is about compromises like that.

If they say yes: Congrats, you have a Facebook. Make sure that your page is set up to prevent everyone and their brother from seeing everything about you.
If they say no: Live without a Facebook. This may sound completely impossible, but it isn't. Really. It's not a big deal, no matter how much you think it is. You'll get over it. If you're stupid enough to go behind your parents' backs after they say no...it wouldn't be anything unusual at your age, but it's still going to bite you in the ass once they catch you. And they will catch you if they're the sort of parents who monitor their kid's internet usage that closely.

I'll try to consult them with the fact they'll be able to monitor my Facebook.
I won't try to sneak it, as I would get heavily punished for doing so.
Thanks for the help everyone.

 

[kochoupink]

I spose I need to clarify what my scope would be. Fiction, really. Be it by ghost writing (which of course would call for either precedence in writing or earned degrees) or blazing with my own work. I can't see college being able to help me with that any more than a series of Wikipedia articles would be able to. I understand the necessity of secondary school in some fields, but not one that requires both left and right brain strengths.

Even "real" authors (Jonathan Safran Foer, for instance, who achieved rare and almost immediate success) have day jobs, often as professors, which require advanced degrees. Writers of genre fiction, unless they are highly successful (Stephen King or what have you), also have day jobs.
Consider also that for every published writer, there are millions more unpublished, some of whom may deserve it more. Sometimes it's not about ability, but connections, and college helps you make those.
Moreover, those who self-identify as having enough "ability" to write often don't. You fall into this category. Your posting of your own SAT score and physics transcript (which I thought was a rickroll when I clicked it and, had it been a rickroll, would have been better) suggest that not only do you have a hyperinflated view of your own intelligence, but you would like us to have the same. (You say otherwise, but your actions speak for themselves)

We don't. Get over yourself and start working in school. Yes, the assignments are pointless. Great. Finish them within ten minutes and get the completion grade. You don't need to study in high school, so don't. In college, you will be graded on your tests and only your tests. It's lovely. Pull up your gpa and get your *** into college so you can get to that sooner rather that later. Secondary school is absolutely necessary for an "author" because, provided you do possess the ability, it will help you get your work into the hands of people who can help you get it published. It will also get your work to a broader audience who can look it over and (most likely) tell you to find another career.

tl;dr: no sympathy. Go to college or work minimum wage for the rest of your life. Good luck!

 

[Sha742]

I hold two part-time jobs. The relevance of college then is...?

 

[kochoupink]

I hold two part-time jobs. The relevance of college then is...?

To not be holding two part-time jobs the rest of your life? To have a meaningful, fulfilling career that supplements your possibly nonexistent career as a writer?

Was that a serious question or are you playing with me?

 

[Sha742]

You're doubting my ability to write because you want to slam me into a vain stereotype. Yes I think I'm intelligent and there's proof of that in historical precedence. Humility is the ultimate form of vanity since denial requires acknowledgment.

I know the importance of a steady job, just not why college is the only path, or the cheapest and least time-consuming. I take the occasional commission for graphic design, and I'm good with my hands otherwise. There's a niche somewhere I could fill that would keep me from falling to the dregs of poverty, and college isn't a necessary stepping stone.


EDIT: No, Serebii posted the post before I had a chance to add anything more to it. I was going to say that I have the diligence to hold jobs to write in my free time, but I decided to just repost and delete it after.

 

[Aquadon]

The thing is Sha, you honestly have no credibility to your name. By going to College, you show employers that you can actually do REAL work (not that rubbish they call work in High School), as well as having four more years to help perfect your work (because to be honest, you're not the best; right now you're just dreaming big). Not to mention the things you can do at College are highly unique; as stated earlier in this thread, you'll never have an experience better than the one you'll get at College.

Depending on what year of High School you're in, I'd say get your act together and actually DO WORK. It's 10 minutes out of your day, and then you can go back to playing Narcissus. Also, depending on where you are, I'd say go to a Community College and use the credits to transfer to a better University/State College. Hell there are actually Colleges with 100% acceptance rates, so you should be able to continue your education (though maybe not at the level you want). As for your "drama" issue, you're going to find that everywhere; not just in High School. Most people at College though are a lot more mature, so you should be able to actually make friends and end up actually enjoying yourself while getting the type of education you want.

 

[Sha742]

Daily homework took about two to three hours when I did it. It's not just some ten minute inconvenience.

Can someone also tell me where the line is between self-confidence and narcissism is? I'm smart. I can excel with effort. That isn't a love for myself so much as assurance in ability.

College isn't free, nor is it in a zone where time doesn't pass and classes don't take hours. Even if the drama is at a more subtle level in college, it isn't worth the x-amount of dollars for a better chance at jobs that I won't bother considering. I'm aware I don't know enough to jump into any field and align a career to it, (Hell, even my knowledge of physics is shaky outside of inapplicable theoretics) but in terms of Graphic Design, Geek Squadin', and other abilities I picked up, I can carve through life just fine without a go at secondary schools.

 

[Krake]

Well, my school's prom is coming up. Weeks ago, I had asked my crush to go with me, to which she said she was already going with someone, but she agreed to save a dance with me.

I originally intended on finding out her feelings for me, but my mom just finished talking to me about how I might need to rethink what I say. I want to find out how she feels about me before I graduate (since graduates get out of school earlier than the underclasses and I'm a grade older than her) and hook up if at all possible before then, but at the same time, I don't want to waste time worrying over it.

Any advice?