All in a Life Time

[Flaming Lip]

'Tis pretty crappy, but I am finally starting to get back in the had of writing poems >>

*kicks self for having a 2 month writers block*

All in A Life Time


Look at him standing there

Running a hand through his hair

Behind him, a home and his sins,

Ahead a new life to begin


He heard, beyond hardship’s cold stare,

There was glory; a breath of air

And to him there was nothing more,

But a shadow drawn, and tattered war.


And so much he did

And so much he learned

And so much was lost

All in a lifetime


Torn and resigned, he gives out a sigh;

Mingling in the air with the truths and lies

A possible future finally gave its last breath;

And a mad resolve suddenly left


And in return came nothing, no tears cried;

Only a lifetime, there to remind

That there’s a time and a word

Then and never; ‘least that’s what he heard


And so much he did

And so much he learned

And so much was lost

All in a lifetime

And in return came nothing, no tears cried;

Only a lifetime, there to remind

That there’s a time and a word

Then and never; ‘least that’s what he heard

 

[xXSaberXx]

Beautiful. Very two sided, bittersweet and perfect. ^.^ Though this one didn't make me cry, it made me stop and think, which I think ALL poems should do.

For some odd reason, when you mentioned war and the rest of the poem then tied into what I thought was very World War II ish. o-o That may just be my opnion, but it reminded of it. ORRRRR an emotional World War II.

Excellent, all the same. The ryhming and meter was very even and fluid. ^.^

 

[Espeon]

It fits perfectly with my current mood, dark and gloomy.

I like it. It seems to have a mysterious atmosphere around it. I like the way organized the poem. The ending ends the circle and go along well with the beginning. Very good.

 

[Quackerdrill]

Ah! A valiant return. Those two months were heck without a NiGHTS poem to fall back on, man! *probably exxagerating* Anyhoo, this was just as good. Reflective, with an interesting take on life's path and how it's gone before it starts... hmmm. Well use of repettion seems to be a trademark of yours, and this may be the best example of said style here. I'm not exactly sure of any connection to a war as a physical conflict, but more as a mental resolution of past sins. XD Oh well. This was great! I hope your return means more of these more often.... (Awfully demanding of me, huh? >_<

 

[Flaming Lip]

Heh. This poem went of better than I thought it would.

No Quackerdrill, from now on my work is going to be about bunnies trying to grow aposable thumbs by twitching their noses.

I sure hope my poems at least stay the same quality. Or better yet, get better.

 

[Kiyohime]

....bunnies with opposable thumbs...oh, dear God no. Then they'll learn how to use bazookas, and then we're all doomed because they multiply like the plague. >.<

What can I say that hasn't already been said? It's about time you came back. ^^ Nice circular theme, and this piece is my favorite:

"He heard, beyond hardship’s cold stare,

There was glory; a breath of air

And to him there was nothing more,

But a shadow drawn, and tattered war."

Very good imagery. ^^

 

[billy5772]

And so much he did

And so much he learned

And so much was lost

All in a lifetime

That alone was pretty profound. The parallelism truly was put to good use. Man, I love that quote right there. That was awesome. It's so, like, belittling the length of a lifetime [even though it's the longest thing any of us will ever do!] and accentuating the gravity of what was accomplished in it at the same time. Awesome.

Yeah, this poem was pretty awesome. Previously, I had thought about trying to write a poem [besides a spoof poem that I wrote], but after reading this, I think I'll leave it to the pro.

 

[Flaming Lip]

Thank you!

*Flan*

Interestingly enough, when I write poems, I don't really have a set meaning involved. I have intentions with my lines, but the human mind will always intepret things differently. Its really fun to see how people interpret my poems.

Anyway, thanks!