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Oh man. Too good. I have a lot of theories towards the council.... But I think I'll keep them towards myself. I love how you put cliffhangers every now and then. Top!
Heh, thanks. Yeah, the Council will (mostly) be explained in the next chapter, which I've just started on. Anyway, thanks for the review!
Sorry for the wait for this next chapter, as it's looking to be one, maybe two more weeks before I can get it done. Life is really hectic right now, so yeah. Thanks again for the review, DG (your name is too long for my impatient self to type out everytime. XD), and hopefully you guys will stick around for the next chapter.
So, now Dusek's (apparently) dead. I still wonder just how many meanings "dead" might have in the context of this story; just as I wonder about what might or might not have actually happened to Michelle, I wonder the same way about Dusek. Although... the fact that it was Giratina who (apparently) killed him does for some reason give me the sense that maybe Dusek is really dead, as in dead. Of course, there is that aforementioned "apparently" in the mix to bear in mind, so hmm.
At any rate, I guess the moral of that event is, "Don't **** off your boss." Especially if your boss happens to be Giratina.
The Resistance that has entered the picture is quite interesting--especially due to this:
"Your mother was the head of it, Duncan. I...Johto...the world owes her a great deal. As we owe you."
The teenager's eyes grew huge, and he slightly backed away. "No...way..."
River smiled. "Yes," he said, amused. "Team Knight was the beginning of the Resistance."
I thought it was cool to see Duncan and Dusek unleashing those powers. One of my favorite moments with regards to that was this:
Duncan's glowing blue eyes flew open. An unbelievable power was coursing through his veins. With each new beat of his heart, more and more of the power spread.
Gently, he rose up off the ground. His entire body was bathed in blue light, contrasting sharply with the dull pallet of grays that surrounded him.
Fury dictated his thoughts, leaving nothing left other than the death of those who had killed her.
The energy enveloped his arm, extending down beyond his fingers. With one broad, slicing motion of his arm, the energy ripped through the awestruck guards.
I liked how River just let his sentence trail off and hang there like that. ^^
Again, I'm not a good person to ask about that. Better left to those brains in the control room."
Duncan nodded silently, then frowned. A slightly disturbing thought ran through his head. "Normally this would sound odd, but not a whole lot does anymore so what the hell? Please tell me you're talking about people, and not brains here."
Immediately River laughed, which made Duncan feel better. Slightly.
So, now Dusek's (apparently) dead. I still wonder just how many meanings "dead" might have in the context of this story; just as I wonder about what might or might not have actually happened to Michelle, I wonder the same way about Dusek. Although... the fact that it was Giratina who (apparently) killed him does for some reason give me the sense that maybe Dusek is really dead, as in dead. Of course, there is that aforementioned "apparently" in the mix to bear in mind, so hmm.
At any rate, I guess the moral of that event is, "Don't **** off your boss." Especially if your boss happens to be Giratina.
Well look here. I thought this was asleep until I (eventually) post a new chapter. XD
Ah, our dear friend Dusek. Actually, next chapter (finally) the whole thing about what being dead is revealed. Of course, it won't make anything clearer. Just...more twisted. XD
Thanks so much for the review, Sike! Your reviews always make me grin. And I love your reaction to that last part. XD
Anyway...well, unfortunately the next chapter is still delayed. A lot. It's been what? A month or so since the last chapter? Right now I'm going to be away from internet again for a bit, but hopefully all this hectic stuff will calm down and I can finally try and iron all the (big) kinks in the next chapter.
Also...a bit off-topic, but I'm dividing my extremely limited writing time between TEN and my new Naruto fic, Fate's Creed. I'll do my best to keep pace with the new chapters of each, so no need (hopefully) to worry. BTW, if anyone's interested, Fate's Creed should be posted here in a week or so. Just finishing some of the editing on that, right now. See you guys, then.
Is it possible? Could the next chapter really be done? Yes, and I thank everyone for their patience. Just a quick note and then you can enjoy. This chapter has given me a LOT of trouble. I wrote it out entirely, didn't like it, then practically rewrote it from scratch (save for one scene). I'm still not a huge fan of it, but I'll be glad when I see the back of this one...so on that note, enjoy the big plot revelations.
blazing dreams: the eternal night
by duncan
this fiction is rated pg-13 for elements of violence and profanity
volume four: the resistance
His dark blue eyes looked up, taking in four people sitting on a raised platform directly in front of him. Each were dressed in long, dark robes, and were all looking down at Duncan with a kind of fervor, as if they weren't believing their eyes.
"Hello." he said sarcastically.
"Duncan, this is the Council," said River, ignoring the sarcastic tone in Duncan's voice. "On the far left is Murdock Whitney, chief builder of the New Johto Alliance."
The teenager's eyes found the man sitting in the far left chair. He was a stout old man, in his sixties. He wore large glasses, with thin white hair covering much of his head. He gave a small smile to Duncan, who nodded curtly.
"Next is Bertha Greenwich, who is our esteemed Council co-chairwoman."
A woman in her forties nodded at Duncan. She had short blond hair with a kind, gentle face, and was dressed in the same black robes, apart from a red collar.
"Next would have been the Council head, but he is absent at the moment, so..." said River, motioning at the empty middle seat. "Next is Timothy-"
"Look, I don't care about their names!" snarled Duncan, clinching his fists and glaring at the taken aback members of the Council. "Just...get on with the reason why I'm here."
Several looks and whispers were exchanged in the Council, but River didn't miss a beat. "Yes, that might be prudent...Ms. Greenwich, if you please...?"
The woman nodded sharply at River, then turned her gaze on the teenager. "Duncan, you do not understand what is going on, so I do not blame you for your outburst. Let me explain.
"About thirty years before the Eternal Night, your mother was...a thief, if I should put it so bluntly. One day, so it goes, she stole a prochecy made by none other than the divine Deity. It told of the Overlord's plot to take over the world, and so she created this Council. Two others that knew of the plot joined her, and together they created Team Knight. Lily knew little about the prochecy or it's implications, but she knew how to do what needed to be done.
"Which was simple. One man was to be chosen by Palkia. With him, the Overlord could take over the world with the Eternal Night. All that was...required, was for this person to be killed, something she was only too eager to do. The other two looked down on Lily with disdain for... her lust for killing. So, they split along their seperate ways. Lily took control of the new organization, and the other two fell into the shadows, giving her instructions on how to deal with the plot as she went along."
A palpable silence fell over the room as all eyes fixed onto Duncan. His face remained impassive, but inside the words were creating havoc.
A prophecy made by none other than the divine Deity...but she knew what needed to be done...one man was to be chosen by Palkia...with disdain for...her lust for killing...
"I see."
The words came, quieter than the grave. A chill ran across the room, and a wave of apprehension washed over the Council. "Where does Tay come into this?"
The Council remained silent, all visibly nervous save for Greenwich. She cleared her throat and spoke.
"He was in it from the beginning. We, that is to say the previous Council, paired him with another from our order, Hanaka Shinoku. They went looking for the Shadow Blade, a katana with frightening powers. You see, it posesses the power to banish whatever it slices into a shadow realm. It was originally made by Giratina, actually."
Again, the room fell silent. "Okay. What happened then?"
As if they all didn't know.
Greenwich nodded. "They were sent to dispatch Giratina, once they had found it. Then...they failed."
A surge of fury, deep in the pit of his stomach, flared. The teenager clenched his fists, trying to keep his mind away from the truth that had been looming. "He...failed?"
River stepped forward, setting a calming hand on Duncan's shoulder. "It's okay," he said quietly. "Perhaps we should finish this later...?"
Heavily lidded eyes looked up, staring Greenwich straight in the eye. "Tell me," he said quietly, his tone colder than ice. "What happened to Tay?"
"He died, Duncan."
~-~-~
Suffocating darkness descended upon her.
Help me...
Shards of death ripped into her body, prizing flesh from bone.
Make it STOP!
Blood spilled from her body, falling into the depths of Hell.
I CAN'T TAKE IT!!!
Slowly her screams petered away and with a final whisper of shadow, the woman fell silent.
"Now...to have some real fun..."
~-~-~
"We need your help."
It wasn't happening.
"To avenge your friend."
It couldn't be happening.
"Without you, Giratina will have won!"
Everyone...
"What we need of you..."
Is gone...
"Is to go into the Eternal Night, and find Tay's journal."
Tay...
"Without the katana, we can't survive. The barrier that protects us from the Eternal Night is crumbling!"
Allen...
"Will you let it happen, Duncan?"
Mom...
"Will you avenge them?"
Michelle...
Everything was liquid, or perhaps he was liquid. Nothing made sense, and yet the universe seemed at his fingertips. All he had to do was reach out, cast aside the shattered threads that held him firm to the world, and it would all be his. All.
Will you avenge them?
The call of revenge filled him up and emptied him out, and made it all the easier to choose. Of course he could leave, destroy the last feeble vestiges of bonds he had left...
Avenge them...
It was what he had to do...perhaps this way he could even meet up with them again...the Beast of Time roared its approval... yes...that is the way it will be done...
"Yes."
~-~-~
The sound of a thousand jackhammers awoke him. Cringing in pain, he reached out to block the wretched noise from his tender ears.
After a moment, however, the sound softened enough for him to open his eyes. A gray ceiling lay over his head, and for a moment fear overtook him. Was he in the Eternal Night again?
"Good morning, Duncan."
The teenager furrowed his brow, raising his head to look at the source of the new noise. River sat on a chair beside his bed, a book in one hand and a glass of water in the other. The rest of the small room was dark and empty, save for a table with a lamp on it beside the man.
"Not really..." he groaned, forcing himself into a sitting position. "What's going on? How long was I out?"
River chuckled. "You...fell over. And not all that long. A few hours, or so."
Duncan fell silent for a moment, knowing full well he had done more than fall over. "I imagine the Council is pissed at me, no?"
"Actually, not really. They sympathize with you, and understand what you've been through," He paused, looking thoughtfully at Duncan. "Although I feel you've been through considerably more than they know."
The teenager nodded, running a hand through his hair. "So...what exactly am I going to be doing?"
River sighed, looking over Duncan. "Let me say something to you, off the record. Personally, I feel that the Council could send any number of other people to go and retrieve Tay's journals, wherever they might be. But I trust them. If they think you should go, then you should. Even if they don't share all their reasons with me..."
Duncan chuckled, shaking his head at River. "Poor neglected you. So...care to enlighten me?"
"Sure. Well, we'll go and take a look at some of the old spots where Tay might have hidden his journal-"
"Wait a minute. We?"
River smiled. "Yes. Apparantly the Council is too pissed at you to leave you alone...or something like that."
Duncan laughed. It felt good, like he hadn't done it in a long time. "Okay, sounds great. Honestly, I'm only a little bit away from insanity, you know?"
"Yeah, somehow I can believe you there," said River, chuckling. "Duncan...I'm sorry about Tay. Honestly, I didn't know."
The smile slid off Duncan's face. "Yeah...I know..."
"Here, I brought something to cheer you up, though." said River, reaching down and handing him an aged yellow folder.
Duncan frowned. "What's that?"
"One of Tay's old journals. Go ahead, enjoy. We're going to be up to our necks in it come tomorrow, so relax, okay?"
"Yeah..."
With a smile, River stood up and left the room, leaving something in Duncan's hands that was more valuable than he could have imagined.
His heart racing, he thumbed open the folder and slid out the first page.
Tay's Journal
Entry # 3084893244444
Okay, so the entry name is wrong. Sue me, why don't you? This is my first journal since I joined the Council, so you better be ready to be amazed. Earlier, the Council paired me up with this hot chick, Shinoku something something. We're going on a mission to find some sword, I think? I was too busy looking at the girl's ass to pay much attention...
Hehe, you're right, this chapter has new plot developments.
I say, you're really getting better and better at emotions. Case in point, after Duncan found out Tay died. I love how you connect his death and also his love ones, thus leading his to avenging everyone he has lost. Not only that, nice style you used too. ^^
Here's one other thing I love:
Tay's Journal
Entry # 3084893244444
Okay, so the entry name is wrong. Sue me, why don't you? This is my first journal since I joined the Council, so you better be ready to be amazed. Earlier, the Council paired me up with this hot chick, Shinoku something something. We're going on a mission to find some sword, I think? I was too busy looking at the girl's a** to pay much attention...
XD Love that entry. Can't wait to see what other entries Tay has written. Should be both fun and educational.
Hm, so I guess Duncan must find both the entries and the blade, huh? However, I'm confused: since Tay and Hanaka found the sword and failed, how is Tay's journal going to help Duncan retreive it? Retrace steps, probably? Sorry if I missed something crucial there. ^^;
Again, great chapter. New developments are coming and also great improvement on the emotions there. Can't wait for the next chapter! ^^
Yes, I do indeed review. First of all, you should probably fix the it's/its muddles: it's is a contraction of it is, while its is the possessive form. I think a simple find-and-replace will suit you well here.
I wonder quite how many plots or conspiracies Lily has gotten herself caught in all those years. If it's not tied to any spoilers, could you define all the diferent bad guys we've been introduced to? There is Giratina, Dusek, the other servant who conspired with Dusek, and an Overlord. Is Giratina the Overlord, or are they different people?
You have an interesting style of showing intense emotion: the character is singled out, with no more indications of an outside world existing than a few disembodied voices; and stream-of-consciousness angst in the background of abstract musing. I like it. I could contribute that you consider a little moderation in it, but this is only a little notion of mine.
Looking forward to more plot complication and more of the teaser you gave for Tay's journal. Also looking forward to see his still-exuberant interactions with the apparently sober council and his partner. My review is shorter than was my custom, but this is because I feel any sort of review is better than the apologies and excuses I like giving.
Hehe, you're right, this chapter has new plot developments.
I say, you're really getting better and better at emotions. Case in point, after Duncan found out Tay died. I love how you connect his death and also his love ones, thus leading his to avenging everyone he has lost. Not only that, nice style you used too. ^^
Okay, so the entry name is wrong. Sue me, why don't you? This is my first journal since I joined the Council, so you better be ready to be amazed. Earlier, the Council paired me up with this hot chick, Shinoku something something. We're going on a mission to find some sword, I think? I was too busy looking at the girl's a** to pay much attention...
XD Love that entry. Can't wait to see what other entries Tay has written. Should be both fun and educational.
Hm, so I guess Duncan must find both the entries and the blade, huh? However, I'm confused: since Tay and Hanaka found the sword and failed, how is Tay's journal going to help Duncan retreive it? Retrace steps, probably? Sorry if I missed something crucial there. ^^;
Again, great chapter. New developments are coming and also great improvement on the emotions there. Can't wait for the next chapter! ^^
Haha, we can't forget our dear friend Tay, can we? He is a lot of fun to write. XD And you can be sure that his journals will be fun, and perhaps a bit educational? Heh.
Exactly, though not at the same time. What happened was after they failed (and I'm not going into details about that), they and the katana were lost. The Council searched for them, but never found anything.
So basically they're making Duncan and River start from scratch, and try to find Tay's journal, in the hopes that it tells where it is. Then they can go and try to retrieve it. Or so the hope is, anyway.
Thanks for the review, Bay, and hopefully (now that I'm finished with that chapter and can get all the ideas flowing again) the next chapter should be up pretty soon. Or at least less than two months. XD
Yes, I do indeed review. First of all, you should probably fix the it's/its muddles: it's is a contraction of it is, while its is the possessive form. I think a simple find-and-replace will suit you well here.
You do, eh? XD Thanks to you as well. And yeah, I apologize for that. I've pretty much always mixed them up for some reason, and I didn't do my usual grammar check for this one. I'll go back and fix them, then.
I wonder quite how many plots or conspiracies Lily has gotten herself caught in all those years. If it's not tied to any spoilers, could you define all the diferent bad guys we've been introduced to? There is Giratina, Dusek, the other servant who conspired with Dusek, and an Overlord. Is Giratina the Overlord, or are they different people?
Okay then. Well, there's Giratina (who is the Overlord), Dusek, the one mystery person who is now in Dusek's position. That's all of the current bad guys (that you should know of right now). Let see here...
Giratina is alive and well, although Dusek's betrayal was a pretty major problem. Dusek is...well, not helping Giratina anymore. And the mystery person is in many positions, only half of which I can explain. He blackmailed (or persuaded, whichever you like) Dusek into telling the Council (without their knowledge that Dusek was the one telling them) that the barrier is weakening. Then he stole the Eternity Crystal and we learned of a prophecy which states that only one will survive when Giratina breaks the barrier. Which may or may not be true. XD
You have an interesting style of showing intense emotion: the character is singled out, with no more indications of an outside world existing than a few disembodied voices; and stream-of-consciousness angst in the background of abstract musing. I like it. I could contribute that you consider a little moderation in it, but this is only a little notion of mine.
Looking forward to more plot complication and more of the teaser you gave for Tay's journal. Also looking forward to see his still-exuberant interactions with the apparently sober council and his partner. My review is shorter than was my custom, but this is because I feel any sort of review is better than the apologies and excuses I like giving.
Yeah, thanks again. Reviews always make my day. The one scene turned out a little better than I thought, but you're right when I need to work on that for the future.
There really won't be much more reading about Tay's journals, but River gave Duncan something pretty much telling him what he already knew. Of course, there will be some more Tay in it, rest assured. XD Thanks again, guys!
Haven't read any of this one yet, but I have read all your others. I am beyond hooked. It took me less than four hours to read all of them. Will start on this either later tonight, or tomorrow. Cheers.
Haven't read any of this one yet, but I have read all your others. I am beyond hooked. It took me less than four hours to read all of them. Will start on this either later tonight, or tomorrow. Cheers.
Yeah, I noticed the same thing earlier. Not a problem. Sure thing, and I'm glad you're caught up.
About the PM list...it has been getting far too large (especially because well over half of the people don't read at all anymore, I don't think). It dates back from LoS, and I think it needs some cleaning up. So, I'm restarting it and only putting on people who want on, or have reviewed lately anyway. If anyone wants back on, feel free to PM me and you'll be added straightaway.
Well here we go again guys. Back to the original chapter schedule, then. I've got a lot of Author's Notes, so they're in the spoiler. Feel free to ignore them and get to the chapter, of course.
This chapter represents somewhat of a turning point in TEN. The first four chapters were played on the defense, but this is where the tide begins to shift.
Also...I had a blast writing this one. My main focus was improving my lackluster description, and by reading the first scene the improvement should be clear. Not perfect of course, but better I feel.
I've got to say, this is my favorite chapter yet. The blend of everything that happens made me very satisfied with it. Of course, what you guys thik is very important, so lash into me, okay?
Oh, and last thing. I've been using the old introduction page for a while now. It looks so good in Wordpad, but on the forum it looks less than spectacular. So...I changed it to something much simpler. Tell me what you think about it. If you like, I'll edit all the old chapters with it as well.
Okay then guys. Enjoy the nice big chapter.
blazing dreams: the eternal night
by duncan
this fiction is rated pg-13 for elements of violence and profanity
volume five: a hero to die for
"Hello Duncan."
The white clouds, contrasting brilliantly with the vivid blue sky, began to part. A beautiful, willowy figure stepped forward, just out of reach. Her long, brown hair gently flowed in the breeze and a long, white dress rippled around her body.
Kind hazel eyes smiled at him.
"It's been a while..."
"Indeed." The figure nodded. Her vibrant eyes found his dead ones, and for a moment she was not looking at him, but rather inside him.
"I missed you..."
"I did too. But I'm here, now."
All the pain, the anger, the frustration that had formed a tight knot in his chest seemed to loosen. "...You are? Really?"
She smiled slightly, inclining her head. "Really. We have so much to talk about..."
He chuckled softly, casting his eyes toward her again. Just gazing at her filled him up with a sense of euphoria that was far more intoxicating than any drug. Her eyes, twinking like a far off star field, were enough to make his knees tremble.
"We do."
The pair stood together, drinking in each other's company. The moment was pure perfection, and nothing would or could change that.
Time was distorted, could they have been there for a minute now? An hour? A day? An eternity?
"I can't stay, you know."
A sad smile found its way on his sullen features. "I do..."
She smiled and leaned forward to whisper in his ear. "I'll always be with you, though. Always..."
She was fading, leaving again. His heart sped up, and pain threatened to overtake him again. It wasn't right...she had just returned to him...how could she leave already?
"Always..." he whispered.
~-~-~
He jolted awake, heart beating out of his chest.
Always...
"Hey...you okay?"
The teenager squinted up at the figure standing over his bed. River's smiling face loomed above him.
"Hey...um...back off a bit?" grumbled Duncan, pulling himself higher up on the bed.
This got a chuckle out of River. "Fair enough," he said, backing away a few steps. "Bad dream?"
Duncan frowned. "Yeah. The worst. What are you doing here?"
"Have you forgotten the whole save the world as we know it mission you volunteered us for?"
"Oh yeah, that one."
River laughed, clapping Duncan on the back. "I thought not. Get dressed and we can get ready for the duel with the Overlord, mate!"
"If you say so..." yawned Duncan. River laughed again and walked out of the room, leaving Duncan with his thoughts.
He ran a sweaty hand across his face, sighing. It was a dream...it had felt so real, though. Almost as if she really was...
He shook his head, repressing the emotions boiling in his chest. He knew that he couldn't keep it in forever, but it was certainly not the time now.
Pulling off the blanket, a yellow folder fell onto the floor beside his bed. Remembering, he walked over and picked it up.
Surely the Council wouldn't mind if he kept it...? A small price to pay, in his mind. Tucking it underneath his arm, the teenager walked out of the room.
~-~-~
"Got any guns?"
"No. We destroyed them all years ago, after the Great War."
Duncan frowned. "Great War? What's that about?"
River straightened up from his bag and looked at Duncan. "Well...about thirty years ago...there was a Great War."
The teenager blinked. "Okay? How the hell did that happen? Who were you fighting?"
River brushed him off with an airy wave of the hand. "Doesn't matter now. So, what all do you need? What kind of weapons do you use? I've heard you were pretty good with them back in the day..."
Duncan shrugged, looking around at the small armory they found themselves in. The dark gray paint over the lockers and walls gave him the uncomfortable feeling of being in the Eternal Night, but as he constantly had to remind himself, it looked the same as any other armory in the world. "Well...I'll take a knife. And some of those throwing stars. Maybe a sword for good measure..."
River chuckled. "Now that scares the hell out of me. You better know how to use this stuff..."
A huge grin unfolded itself on Duncan's features. "Oh, I don't."
"Great..." muttered River. "Okay, here's a knife, standard issue. And it's case, which you need to keep out of sight. Remember, although I really doubt we'll be able to walk in and not get into ten fights, we need to look like we're not crack commandos, okay?"
"We aren't." reminded Duncan, sliding the knife out of it's case and examining it.
"That's the spirit!" exclaimed River. "Okay...here are some of your 'throwing stars', and a case for them as well. Believe me, keep the latch closed on those. It'll make a right mess out of...just keep it closed..."
Duncan took the small pouch of throwing stars, chuckling. "Will do. What about a sword? I've got to say I'm pretty clueless about that..."
"Okay," nodded River, opening one of the lockers and withdrawing a short katana. "This here is a katana, not unlike what we're looking for. Except...I wouldn't advise stabbing Giratina with this one. Anyone else is fair game, though."
The teenager took the katana, testing it's weight in his hands. "Okay...I really don't know how to use this, though. I prefer my pistol...but this will have to do. Any pointers?"
"Surely," said River, pulling out an identical katana of his own. "Lift it up, and slice the hell out of anyone in front of you. Got it?"
Duncan chuckled, shaking his head. "Yeah...so what do we do when we find...a guard or whatever?"
River frowned. "What do you mean?"
"What do I mean? People can't die in the Eternal Night!"
The man paused. "What are you talking about? Of course people can die, those soldiers died when you killed them didn't they? And so did...other people..."
Confusion was etched all over Duncan's face. "I...what? Soldiers?"
River chuckled and stood up. "Don't worry about it. Everything got pretty hectic there in the heat of the moment. It's okay. Finish packing whatever else you want and meet me outside, just up the elevator here."
With that, he left the room. Duncan shook his head.
"What the hell have I gotten myself into...?"
~-~-~
"Okay."
"Good," said River, looking Duncan up and down. "Let's hit it, then."
Duncan nodded, watching as the secret elevator descended back into the ground above the Council. There were so many questions he had...
"Okay, so we're going to travel the whole day, I'd say. We have to be there by midnight, though. Hope you don't mind walking."
"Midnight? Why? And not really."
"You'll see." said River cryptically. With a quiet chuckle, he began walking, Duncan at his side.
As they began to walk, the teenager took in the scenery. Goldenrod City quickly fading behind them, the land was almost immediately overtaken by forest, with only a small, narrow path cleared to serve as the path.
The trees, Duncan noticed with a smile, were a vibrant green. The forest seemed alive with movement and noise, but something seemed off. He couldn't quite place it, but something was definitely different.
"Something's...different..."
"Hmm?"
"Look," said the teenager. "The forest...there's something missing..."
River paused, frowning. The pair looked around quietly for a moment, until River broke the silence. "It seems normal to me. Why, what's the matter?"
"I don't know..." He thought back, and the answer hit him almost immediately. "Pokemon! There aren't any Pokemon! Surely we should have seen something yet?"
River laughed. "Pokemon? There haven't been Pokemon around since the Eternal Night, not even in Johto."
"What?" frowned Duncan. "No Pokemon? That's screwed up. Where are they?"
The man shrugged. "I dunno. They all just disappeared, didn't they? Come on, let's get moving. Can't be late."
Shaking his head, Duncan began walking again. A world without Pokemon? What was going on here?
~-~-~
"Whew, I think this is a good place to take a break, don't you?"
"Yeah. Nice place, this," said Duncan, looking around. They had been traveling for about three hours now, and couldn't have picked a better place to rest. They were on the top of a cleared hill overlooking a vast valley of untouched forest. Mountains flanked them on three sides, but their path was clear. None of this was weighing on his mind, though. "What happened with Dusek?"
River jumped and shot Duncan a look. "What?"
"After Michelle...died...my memory's a bit hazy...what happened? What did you do to him?"
River frowned. "Dusek? I don't know what you're talking about."
The teenager frowned. "Of course you do. Don't give me that shit, River! What happened?"
"Drop it, okay?"
This surprised Duncan. Not the words, but the soft tone River said them in. "No, I won't. What did you do to drive him off?"
River paused, scutinizing Duncan as if to decide to answer him or not. After a moment, he sighed. "Duncan, I didn't drive him off. You did."
The words drove into Duncan's subconsious like a thunder clap. "What?" he asked, his voice sounding weak and far away.
"Let me tell you a very long story that should clear you up. Thousands, maybe millions of years ago, the first Eternity was created by Arceus, the divine Deity. He created Dialga, to marshal all of Time to create order. He created Palkia, to marshal all of Space to create a place to have order. Earth was created, and people and Pokemon were put upon it.
"Yet there was still a flaw in the plan. People prospered, and there was peace. But...as the centuries stretched on, old men and women who had been there from the beginning began questioning everything. You see, there was no death, no afterlife, nothing. Just the same life, the same things happening day after day forever."
"Are you serious?"
"Very. Realizing this, Arceus, who believed the best in everyone, created Giratina to create an afterlife, or middle life. Immediately, people began dying, going off to the middle life. Everything was restored to order again, and everything worked as it should.
"But there was conflict between Dialga and Palkia. Each believed they were superior to each other. So they began to fight, a battle that disrupted time and space and ultimately left the first Eternity in shambles.
"Furious, Arceus cast the pair in an alternate dimension, taking their power from them to use to create the second Eternity. Again, everything prospered. But the tainted power from Dialga and Palkia's great clash still remained, causing mistrust and hate among both Pokemon and humans.
"However, the squabbles never got to a level that was beyond control. While Arceus silently tended to the second Eternity, Dialga and Palkia continued fighting, their power slowly weakening without a base. Arceus realized this, and embodied two people with their powers.
"The first was Marvolo Dusek. He, given his lineage, was granted the Power of Space. Unknowingly, he anchored the world to Space. His first born son was to be given the Powers of Time, and therefore the second piece of the puzzle would be put in place. Duncan, you are that son."
~-~-~
“The truth sets in! You are no longer bound by the restrictions of your heart, the foolish part of you that dictates right and wrong! There is no good and evil, merely the workings of the universe! There are two sides. Space, represented by me. And Time, represented by you.”
"I know."
The man's eyes grew wide. "You do?"
“I understand now. It was destined for us to be here. But the outcome will be far different than what you believe,”
“What?”
“Yes. This is not about us. It is about the Legends of Time and Space!”
"Yeah..." The teenager shook his head, as if to dislodge the memories bubbling to the surface of his subconsious. "Why do you say it?"
River shook his head, and suddenly a shadow fell across his face. "Why? Are you truly ignorant of what gift has been bestowed upon you? Think, imagine, what all you could do! Dusek has power beyond belief and you have the same potential! Yet you ignore it?"
Fury exploded inside Duncan faster than he thought possible, and the truth dawned on him. River's friendly facade...had been just that. "Have you paused to think that maybe I don't want these powers? The responsibility?" snarled Duncan.
River's eyes flashed with anger. "Don't you understand?" he asked coldly. "If I had your powers, I could become a great hero of the people of Johto! I could use your powers to hold the barrier up longer, to rid the world of the cursed Eternal Night!"
"You don't understand!" yelled Duncan, closing his eyes. River's words cut deeply, and in return his arguments seemed feeble and weak.
"I don't understand? I don't understand? I've lived my entire life in the Eternal Night! The world is horrible! Think back, think about Michelle! Think about the millions of people who are sitting comotose right now, with not enough will to move. For years at a time! And think, think about you, who refuse to even acknoledge the fact that you could change it. Duncan, people would kill for that kind of power."
"Is that a threat?"
He's wrong.
"What if it is?" asked River quietly. "How does that make you feel?"
"I don't have to listen to this."
Lies. Lies. Lies! LIES!
"Yes, you do. If I don't get some sense into you, people will continue to die! Duncan, this is the only way! What do you think our chances of finding the katana are? Of course Giratina got it, of course he's destroyed it by now!" exclaimed River passionately.
"What makes you think that I can do anything in the first place?"
Yes, yes, nothing I can do...
"How can you not try? Believe me, this is a better way than what else could be done to you."
A threat...yes...he lies...
Duncan's eyes snapped open, and he flew to his feet, fists raised. River hastened to his feet as well, drawing his katana as he went.
The moment stood still, and neither so much as blinked. Suddenly everything sounded louder than it was; the wind, the trees, his breathing, his heartbeat. Everything.
"...If you want my powers so badly," said Duncan quietly. "Then come and take them."
River raised his katana a fraction of an inch, but didn't move toward Duncan. Regret had made its way onto his face, and with a sigh he lowered the katana and the tense moment passed. "No, I don't think that will be necessary. We need to get moving."
Duncan lowered his fists as well, and gave River a curt nod. "After you," he said with a hint of malice.
~-~-~
The moon was bright, lending the night sky a pale glow. Stars twinkled in and out of vision, and not a cloud was in sight. The wind had died down, and the night air was refreshingly cool and crisp.
Duncan took all of this in as he stepped out from the thick trees and looked up at the night sky. "It's getting late," he said tiredly. "Why do we have to be there by midnight?"
River nodded at the top of a sloping hill that lay directly in front of them. "Once we get to the top of the hill, you'll understand."
Frowning, Duncan stepped up his pace. The long days' trek had taken its toll on him, and he was aching for a bed. Or piece of flat ground. Maybe even a soft rock...
Without fully realizing it, he stepped over the top of the hill and kept going. After all, nothing seemed out of the ordinary. They were now in hill county, where one large green hill ran into the next, and the next.
Only a moment later he realized his mistake. He stopped in his tracks, mouth agape. "Are you kidding me?"
River stepped up next to him, shaking his head. "No. This is the boundary between Johto and the Eternal Night."
Duncan shook his head and returned his gaze to the field below. There was no physical change, but a massive line divided the field into two. One half, the one they were on, was normal in all ways. Past the line, everything was devoid of color. Completely. The long, ghostly line ran down the side of the hill and off to the left and right as far as he could see. It was an amazing sight, no doubt.
"Holy shit..." muttered Duncan in awe. "This...gives you a scope for the thing..."
"Yes it does," said River, not sparing the phenomenon a second glance. "You see, on our side the barrier weakens for a few seconds at midnight, every night. Just long enough for a couple guys to get through. Works the same way back, as well. But besides that...it's like running into a wall."
"I'll take your word for it..." said Duncan. "What time is it?"
"11:55. Lucky for us, we barely made it. If we didn't, we'd have had to camp out here until tomorrow night." said River, consulting his watch.
"This...is...yeah..." said Duncan quietly.
"I agree..." muttered River absentmindedly. "We need to be standing directly in front of it, so that when midnight strikes, we'll be ready."
"Yeah..."
The pair walked down the rest of the hill, coming to a stop just a few feet away from the barrier. A sort of energy was eminating from it, making the hairs on the back of Duncan's neck stand up. They remained silent for a minute, Duncan still absorbing the idea of the barrier.
"Okay, thirty seconds. Get ready, now."
"Yeah," said Duncan, clearly anxious. "Midnight...a fitting title, no doubt."
I can't comment on your current story, but I just wanted to drop in and say I'm trying to play catch up. I love fics that continue over multiple fics... I'm currently almost done Journey to Be the Best, and don't want to ruin anything in this one by reading ahead.
JtbtB is quite enjoyable though, really love the plot. I can only imagine the things that happen in the next couple fics. I imagine your I'll see a difference in your writing as you age too, which should be interesting to see. Can't wait to get caught up and be able to follow this one.
Just wanted to let you know I'm enjoying your story.
I'll do my best. Hopefully it should be about a week, but I really enjoyed writing this chapter so I spent a little more time working on it. And you think? So do I. I'll go change all the others...sometime. XD
And thanks so much for reviewing. It's been a while, didn't know you were still reading. I'll put you back on the PM list, then.
I can't comment on your current story, but I just wanted to drop in and say I'm trying to play catch up. I love fics that continue over multiple fics... I'm currently almost done Journey to Be the Best, and don't want to ruin anything in this one by reading ahead.
JtbtB is quite enjoyable though, really love the plot. I can only imagine the things that happen in the next couple fics. I imagine your I'll see a difference in your writing as you age too, which should be interesting to see. Can't wait to get caught up and be able to follow this one.
Just wanted to let you know I'm enjoying your story.
You're reading the first saga. Oh great, another tainted mind...let me assure you, it does get better.
Yes, the only redeeming quality about it is the plot. Thank you so much for your readership (?), and you're too kind about that. Don't want to give everyone else the idea, do we?
You see, that's the whole point. If you are craving more at the end of the chapter, you'll want to stick with me for the rest of it. Glad to see you're figuring me out. XD
Thank you as well for the review, and I'm really glad everyone has seemed to like the chapter as much as I did.
You see, that's the whole point. If you are craving more at the end of the chapter, you'll want to stick with me for the rest of it. Glad to see you're figuring me out. XD
Thank you as well for the review, and I'm really glad everyone has seemed to like the chapter as much as I did.
I can see why you like writing this chapter a lot. Quite a lot of character and plot development here. (nods)
I'll say I quite like the beginning a lot because I like how you put Duncan's emotions during the dream and after. I have to also say aw that him and Michelle together for a little bit. I must say this is Duncan's most blazing dream yet! (gets shot XD).
There is one thing I want to mention though:
The white clouds, contrasting brilliantly with the vivid blue sky, began to part. A beautiful, willowy figure stepped forward, just out of reach. Her long, brown hair gently flowed in the breeze and a long, white dress rippled around her body.
There's a reason why I bold a couple of the adjectives. As much as I love Michelle, I really do not like it when a narrator straight out saying this character is beautiful, ugly, mean, etc. If it's more based on Duncan's thoughts then I would be a little more lenient but there seems to be no indicator that Duncan is thinking Michelle is beautiful and such. The reason for that is because it seems like the author is labeling their characters and as if to drive home that the good guys have those qualities and the bad guys have those qualities. I'm not saying you're doing that but sometimes you have to be careful how you describe your characters and what words you used. Sorry if this is a bit harsh but this is one of my pet peeves and also I'm a believer that everyone has their own definition of beauty. ^^;
Another thing is the scene break thing again:
"The first was Marvolo Dusek. He, given his lineage, was granted the Power of Space. Unknowingly, he anchored the world to Space. His first born son was to be given the Powers of Time, and therefore the second piece of the puzzle would be put in place. Duncan, you are that son."
~-~-~
“The truth sets in! You are no longer bound by the restrictions of your heart, the foolish part of you that dictates right and wrong! There is no good and evil, merely the workings of the universe! There are two sides. Space, represented by me. And Time, represented by you.”
Maybe it's just me, but I feel once again the scene break broke the flow of the story. The thing is those two scenes are at the same time, same place. I would be okay when scene break comes if that new scene is at either a different time or different place. Since those two scenes are occurring at the same time and same place, they could just be together. I know you're doing that for suspense effect, but I felt that suspense effect could work well without the scene break.
However, love the last part. Quite like the intense moment Duncan and River had over the Sinnoh legend stuff. I admit they kind of gave up arguing a little too easy, but sometime tells me that subject won't rest just yet. Also, I love Duncan's thoughts at the end, very poetic. That, and also like everyone else it makes the reader want to know what's going to happen next. ^^
Again, quite love the chapter. Sorry if I talk about the negative more, but I also want to give advice on how to improve and also I tend to explain a lot. ^^; Before I go, I want to leave with my favorite part in this chapter:
River chuckled. "Now that scares the hell out of me. You better know how to use this stuff..."
A huge grin unfolded itself on Duncan's features. "Oh, I don't."
I can see why you like writing this chapter a lot. Quite a lot of character and plot development here. (nods)
I'll say I quite like the beginning a lot because I like how you put Duncan's emotions during the dream and after. I have to also say aw that him and Michelle together for a little bit. I must say this is Duncan's most blazing dream yet! (gets shot XD).
The white clouds, contrasting brilliantly with the vivid blue sky, began to part. A beautiful, willowy figure stepped forward, just out of reach. Her long, brown hair gently flowed in the breeze and a long, white dress rippled around her body.
There's a reason why I bold a couple of the adjectives. As much as I love Michelle, I really do not like it when a narrator straight out saying this character is beautiful, ugly, mean, etc. If it's more based on Duncan's thoughts then I would be a little more lenient but there seems to be no indicator that Duncan is thinking Michelle is beautiful and such. The reason for that is because it seems like the author is labeling their characters and as if to drive home that the good guys have those qualities and the bad guys have those qualities. I'm not saying you're doing that but sometimes you have to be careful how you describe your characters and what words you used. Sorry if this is a bit harsh but this is one of my pet peeves and also I'm a believer that everyone has their own definition of beauty. ^^;
Finally someone isn't just saying good chapter. XD *gets mobbed by now-angry reviewers* You have a very good point here. The scene was from Duncan's POV at first, but it sounded better in third person so I did it that way. And I wrote it like that because...erm...it looked good. XD I see what you mean, I won't do that anymore then.
"The first was Marvolo Dusek. He, given his lineage, was granted the Power of Space. Unknowingly, he anchored the world to Space. His first born son was to be given the Powers of Time, and therefore the second piece of the puzzle would be put in place. Duncan, you are that son."
~-~-~
“The truth sets in! You are no longer bound by the restrictions of your heart, the foolish part of you that dictates right and wrong! There is no good and evil, merely the workings of the universe! There are two sides. Space, represented by me. And Time, represented by you.”
Maybe it's just me, but I feel once again the scene break broke the flow of the story. The thing is those two scenes are at the same time, same place. I would be okay when scene break comes if that new scene is at either a different time or different place. Since those two scenes are occurring at the same time and same place, they could just be together. I know you're doing that for suspense effect, but I felt that suspense effect could work well without the scene break.
Okay, I have a good explanation. Honest. See, even though it was mainly for the suspense, also Duncan's thoughts kind of came through in the next section. I got into his head some, almost a bit like last chapter I guess, except not that bad. I will try to tone those down in the future, though. They're just so fun to write!
However, love the last part. Quite like the intense moment Duncan and River had over the Sinnoh legend stuff. I admit they kind of gave up arguing a little too easy, but sometime tells me that subject won't rest just yet. Also, I love Duncan's thoughts at the end, very poetic. That, and also like everyone else it makes the reader want to know what's going to happen next. ^^
Again, quite love the chapter. Sorry if I talk about the negative more, but I also want to give advice on how to improve and also I tend to explain a lot. ^^; Before I go, I want to leave with my favorite part in this chapter:
River chuckled. "Now that scares the hell out of me. You better know how to use this stuff..."
A huge grin unfolded itself on Duncan's features. "Oh, I don't."
Thank you! Yeah, they gave up way too easily, but River kind of realized that he wasn't getting anywhere, and he needed to have them both cool it fast. And oh no, that subject is just beginning. XD
And Duncan's thought at the end almost didn't go in there. I was just going to have them walk through the barrier, but I love countdown scenes, so I added that at the last minute. XD
Heh, yeah she did. XD Thanks for the review, Bay, and also the concrit.
Yeah. XD