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comebacks/insults/pick up lines

Ice Blue Dragon

I belive I can fly!
^ that one was good.

When someone annoys me, I prefer to just yell a parodox at them and run.
 

streetlightdsb

Uni hiatus
If you get someone who keeps mimicking you...
"If I wanted my own comeback I would have wiped it off your mom's chin."

I'm so sorry.

If only I had been online 4 hours ago; this is exactly what I was thinking.

Besides that though, it depends on what's being said. I try to be wittier on the fly than to shoot off pre-planned comebacks!

Also pick up lines do not work.
 

Gelatino95

Not a tool
Besides that though, it depends on what's being said. I try to be wittier on the fly than to shoot off pre-planned comebacks!

That doesn't work for me since I'm a relatively slow thinker. I can rarely come up with witty material on the spot. Whenever I think of something good, it's too late and it would sound totally awkward if I said it at that point.

If you get someone who keeps mimicking you...
"If I wanted my own comeback I would have wiped it off your mom's chin."

I still don't get this one.
 
Get your coat I've got a knife made me chuckle the first time.

However, nothing will ever touch the revulsion/chuckle I had to suppress with "let's not turn this rape into a murder".

If you could use those and still pull, well played sir, well played.
 

Gelatino95

Not a tool
gf: you don't love me.
me: yes i do!!
gf: no you donttt. if you did, you would tell the whole world.
me: i love you.
gf: that wasn't the whole world -.-
me: you ARE my whole world <3
gf: awwwwwwwwwwhh! i love you too baby! im so sorry <3

That last line would never happen in our world.
 

Josiah

is your favorite
That doesn't work for me since I'm a relatively slow thinker. I can rarely come up with witty material on the spot. Whenever I think of something good, it's too late and it would sound totally awkward if I said it at that point.



I still don't get this one.
comeback
*** back
 

Tyranitarquake

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAX!!!
Gelatino95 said:
That doesn't work for me since I'm a relatively slow thinker. I can rarely come up with witty material on the spot. Whenever I think of something good, it's too late and it would sound totally awkward if I said it at that point.

It's the same for me. Not only comebacks though, almost everything. It's one of the reasons why I fail at english in school. Takes me a good chunk of time to think of something decent.
 

streetlightdsb

Uni hiatus
That doesn't work for me since I'm a relatively slow thinker. I can rarely come up with witty material on the spot. Whenever I think of something good, it's too late and it would sound totally awkward if I said it at that point.

I did say try :p I think if you're trying to seem witty by coming up with something you've prepared in advance then you'll look less clever than if you say nothing personally.

I think it was Lincoln who said "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to open one's mouth and remove all doubt".
 

abrar14

Statter Master
Your mums so ugly that when i took her to a haunted house she came out with a job application
 

natie

Mr. F
Summary of this thread: your mum.
 

Moneyy

INACTIVE
Whenever you get into an argument with a girl, just tell them a joke:

Women's rights.
 
if you're getting into a fight with one of those "cool" girls who think they are the Sh*t, just say

"you're as fake as your hair color"

if you're getting into a fight with a douchebag, just walk away and say

"tell your mom I'll be over at 8"
 

Asbestospoison

Excellent Driver
How appropriate. You fight like a cow.

Monkey Island references aside, my favorite comeback would have to be this:
Some prissy annoying popular girl:"That shirt is so stupid and ugly"
Me: "Said the girl wearing a Justin Beiber shirt"
Girl: "No one even likes Captain America"
Me: "No one likes you either, but I don't see you on anyone's shirt"
 
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