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Decision

Quackerdrill

say yes to love
Hello, 'tis the Quackerdrill again, and for those who read "Destined Flames" (It's in Completed Fics for your info), this is the semi-sequel. I say semi because it is completely different in style and ideals to the true sequel, the third in the trilogy that is coming soon. But this needed to be written because of the way it bridges the gap between the two and answers some questions you may have had about the ending of DF. So, enough of my blather...

1

The summer sun shone down on the shores of Mikan Island like it had not in six years. Children were lining up for ice cream, people were walking their Poocheyena, and the waves crashed on the sand with a renewed sense of purpose. This sense found residence in most of the people on the island, except for one.

Lance sat on a bench, with an unkempt dark colored cape wrinkled under him, wearing a hat that just covered his head enough to shade from the sun. He watched the shore and the people running by with quiet attention, as people sat down on the bench next to him, and then quickly left. He thought that this stream would never end, as it seemed that he could time it to five seconds for each person, with seven minute intervals. He was obviously bored to death, and was hoping that sometime, someone would actually have a purpose to their arrival. Everything was viewed a bit off-kilter in his mind at the time, however, so in those five seconds, purpose may have been closer than he thought.

Lance tilted his hat up and gazed at the clouds. It had taken him a very long time to earn this kind of relaxation. Whether his mind determined this as his gift was doubtful. He was going through a time where everything was about self doubt; the kind of time where anything that went wrong could be easily assessed by becoming the cause. He had made a decision that even after one excruciating year still had him guilty, and yet, satisfied. This ambiguity was not a great feeling, but one that needed to escape.

A young girl came quickly up to the bench at this moment, paused, and collapsed in the seat. Her jeans were ripped and her shoulders revealed by a strapless top were a bright burnt red. She sighed and looked over to Lance.

“You trying to see pictures in those clouds or something?” the girl asked, getting no reaction out of him. He simply paid no attention and tried to use the girl’s suggestion. He found a cloud that looked like a Pikachu, and was too interested to bother keeping it in.

“That one’s a Pikachu, if that’s what you’re waiting for.” He pointed to the sky, his hand followed by the girl’s eyes.

“You don’t… look all that comfortable, I mean, you don’t see people wearing dark clothes that much in the summer, you know,” she said, examining Lance. “Are you okay? Seems like something’s really troubling you…”

Lance gave in again. “You have some guts to talk to strangers. I’m sure your mother would be glad to hear what you’ve been doing. Besides, you look pretty down, too.” He finally looked down at the girl. She was slumped and her black hair looked like it hadn’t been washed in days.
“You shouldn’t pry into the life of a stranger, you know,” she said sarcastically. “No, it’s just… life’s been tough. You know, school, training, family…” Lance raised an eyebrow.

“Come on, that’s just your teenage instincts kicking in. You won’t have any real problems until you’re older,” he said with a smile. “You have nothing to worry about.” The girl leaned her head on her hand and stared angrily at Lance.

“Nothing? Are you kidding me?” she shouted. Lance was taken aback. “I have so many darn things going wrong in my life, and you’re saying that this… this is all nothing?” She stared down at the sand beneath the bench and moved her bare feet across it.

“You have to realize something,” Lance said, looking down at her feet. “There was a time where I would have said that all the problems in life were trials meant to test you, and that you are not able to stop them, but now I’m not sure. I wish I could help. I really do, it’s just that I was a teenager once, and I thought I had problems, too. But now… I don’t know.” The girl looked up at Lance and brushed her bangs away from her green eyes.

“You do sound really… affected, to say the least… but I think that if destiny really existed, I wouldn’t have taken these things so hard. I see why you’re so confused… there’s a fine line between predetermined paths and human decision. I think of the latter to be true, myself.”

Lance couldn’t believe that he was slightly agreeing with the girl. His life had always been centered on a belief in destiny, and now it became an incomprehensible figment of imagination. How one decision can change a life was a question of importance to him, and he wondered about how this attitude would have changed if it hadn’t occurred.

“Life…is weird, I’m sure you don’t have to have a lot of coaxing to believe that. Destiny is more of a choice than something that already exists. If you believe, it seems like it happens. I should know…” Lance wearily told the girl.

“You don’t seem like that kind of person. I mean, if lame stuff happens, it’s because you brought it upon yourself. Stuff like fate is just the self-esteem saving chicken way out. Just my opinion, you know…” Lance found himself offended.

“What? Chicken… believing in destiny is not weak… wait, what am I doing?” Lance had realized that he was much more undecided than he thought. He never thought he would question his thoughts and beliefs like he had. He realized for the first time that there was a chance that he had been hypocritical for most of his life, saying that his life was guided by fate while making questionable decisions.

“Well, that doesn’t matter,” he said finally, “I guess I don’t exactly know where my life is leading, either…” The girl stood up, grabbed her belongings and smiled for the first time since Lance saw her.

“Well, I guess I should be going, I now realize that maybe there is some stuff I have to do, whether I like it or not.”

Lance watched as the girl walked away towards the shore, saw a young man by the waves and hugged him. They both then looked at the clouds, the girl’s finger pointing straight up. Lance thought about her words, and then, for the first time in weeks, a name came to his thoughts. Flannery.
 

billy5772

SENIOR
Good start Quackerdrill! I don't have a whole lot of time to review right now, but I'll be back to edit this post. There were some comma issues and an instance where you said:

"...a time where"

when it should have been

"...a time when"

I'll be back!
 

Breezy

Well-Known Member
Although I haven't read the prequel to this, I must say that I do like this all the same. *figures she should read the prequel in order to get why Lance is thinking about Flannery* Heh.

I like your style of writing for some reason. It's not chock full of description and doesn't smother you with five-dollar words. It's simplistic in a formal sense of style if you catch my drift . . .

Anyways, I like how that random girl made Lance think unexpectedly like that when she thought she had her own problems. Of course destiny pops in, but that's fine since it wasn't the cliche "destiny is yours to command".

A few mitakes in comma usage (too many and too less), but nothing to bad to worry about.

Whee. I like it so far. *sucky review x 100!* I apologize for my lack of skills today. ._.;

LaTeR dAyZ!
 

Quackerdrill

say yes to love
Whoo! I'm happy with the reviews so far! I know it's soon, but here's more... Just for your info, this is only a four-part fic, so it might be over faster than you think. Well, I've already said too much...

2

It had been about twenty minutes since the girl had left, and the sun was almost touching the waves in a brilliant orange horizon. Lance watched a flock of Wingull approach from the right and gazed at their formation.

“Aren’t they a wondrous sight?” a voice asked coming from his left side. Lance was shocked, as he had not even thought of someone coming to sit down.

He looked over and saw a fit-looking, albeit elderly man who was staring at the flock just as he had. The man finally looked down and smiled at Lance.

“This is always a great bird watching point,” he said, “and you don’t see Wingull over Mikan that often. They must be migrating from Hoenn… Oh, sorry to startle you…” Lance shook the man’s hand briskly, and looked over the other direction for a moment.

“Something troubling you, sir?” the man asked. Lance turned around, slightly annoyed. That question had already begun to grate on his nerves.

“Well, honestly, I just… have something on my mind, that’s all. You know the feeling when you made a decision, but aren’t sure it was the right one?” The man tilted his head down and mumbled to himself.

“All too well, son… all too well…” The man sank in his seat. Lance suddenly became curious.

“I’m guessing that you’ve been through your share of decisions gone wrong,” he said.

“Saying ‘just a share’ is a massive understatement, son. How about an entire lifetime?” Lance looked down and thought about the possibilities. Living a long life meant more challenges; he was kind of half-hoping to die young at the moment.

“Has it really been that bad? I’m sure whatever you’ve done, people have forgiven you.”

“Forgiveness is relative, son, it depends completely on the subject. Some things are just beyond forgiving. Some of the things I’ve done, I worry, hurt some people so badly that I seem to them a demon in disguise…” The man’s face was more wrinkled than before as he stared at the waves.

Lance took a moment to think about his words. He agreed that some things just couldn’t be forgiven, no matter how hard you try. But the fact that he thought that some people hated him because of these choices seemed strange. Lance knew that his choices weren’t always accepted in other people’s hearts, but he never thought they would have such a heavy resonance in other’s minds.

Of course, then there was Flannery. A decision so relevant in his mind that it almost overtook his life. It had never occurred to him that Flannery could have taken it a little harder than he did. Forgiveness is relevant, he thought. How would I have reacted if a girl whom I loved did that to me? Er, I mean, thought that I, er, she, loved me…what am I doing?

“You okay?” The man asked. Lance had been very quiet since his last comment. “If I’m boring you to death with my tales of woe, I’m welcome to move…” Lance looked up and smiled.

“I don’t think you need another feeling of mistake in your life.” The man slumped back into his seat, as if Lance’s words were comforting. “Maybe you have a point, just maybe, but thinking that negatively has got to do a number on your mental state. I’m sure whatever you’ve done, those people have forgiven you. Time heals all wounds, after all. In fact, you’ve actually made me realize that someone in my life may have been more forgiving than I thought.” The man opened his mouth.

“You are one strange man… to think of the thoughts going through your head. You turned around every darn word I said, didn’t you?” Lance smiled and pointed to the sky.

“That one,” he said, beaming, “is a Pikachu.”

“My gosh…” The man rose from his seat and slowly walked away, a flock of Wingull directly above him.
 

billy5772

SENIOR
in other’s minds.

"in others' minds."

Anyway, this chapter was just as good as the last one. OnLy FoUr ChApTeRs?! What's that about? Well, we'll see what you do with the 2 you have left. I like the way you're exploring Lance's philosophy through conversations with strangers. I'm guessing Flannery will be in chapter 4 after Lance has had time to think things through? Well, keep it up. Ol' Billy has to get outta here now.

-Billy5772 has left the thread
 

Quackerdrill

say yes to love
Well, those who have been reading this (Massive thanks to those people), here is part three. As for some... predictions that have been made, just wait and find out. I'm sure you'll be happy.

3

The sun had finally touched the waves, and the balmy breeze was cooling down. Lance had put down his hat and decided to check the time on his phone. As it always did, the phone’s arrival in his hands went from checking time to opening up to playing a game. He never knew why this happened; it was through some kind of ritual that the sight of his phone was enough to remind him of what an avid gamer he was.

“Tetris never gets old, huh?” Lance looked up to see a young boy with a grey jacket sitting next to him, looking over his shoulder at his phone. This reminded him that he still was playing a game, but before he looked back down, the results screen was already shown, and the score was abnormally low. The boy sat back down in the bench and sighed. “You have to pay better attention…” Lance shut his phone angrily and shoved it into his pocket.

“If it wasn’t for you, I’d have gotten a high score,” he said. The boy looked at him quizzically.

‘Oh, come on, I bet your girlfriend could get a better score.” Lance cringed.

“Correction; I don’t have a girlfriend and it would be none of your business if I did. Now let me to my own devices.” The boy didn’t leave; instead he just looked straight at the waves, occasionally taking a quick look at Lance. This wore on his nerves, but before he overreacted, he remembered what happened last time when he read into something. He quickly grabbed his hat and held it defensively on his other side, away from the boy. The silence was becoming equally awkward for both of them.

“Um… besides, you’re too young to be worrying about girlfriends,” Lance said, cutting the silence like a Scyther’s blades through a pillow. The boy was as if he had been woken up from a dream-laden sleep.

“Too young?” the boy said. “I’m fifteen, and my parents say its okay.”

“But do you have a girlfriend now?” The boy paused and looked at his feet.

“Well… not… exactly… no. I used to, but… I don’t want to go into that.” Lance was strangely interested.

“It probably isn’t my business, but was she cute?”

“Oh, she was the most beautiful girl… short brown hair and the grandest smile in all the Orange Archipelago. She would always have the greatest deposition and stature, always comforting me and praising me. I’m still not sure why she wanted to just be friends. Girls are a mystery…” Amen to that, Lance thought.

“She just probably changed her mind about her life. You know, when you’re a kid you don’t always know what you want to do exactly, and she must have seen a path she could take that… well, didn’t include you.” The boy became even unhappier than before.

“You may be right, but this whole love thing is just so darn confusing. I mean, I can memorize the Type Weakness Chart, all the badges and leaders in Kanto, Johto, and Hoenn, and all three hundred and eighty-six Pokemon, but I can’t get this girl thing down. Maybe she never really liked me…”

Lance couldn’t believe what he was hearing. No matter how hard he tried to deny it, having girls around him at every waking moment was easy, at least for him. But there were few that actually meant something in his mind, one being Flannery. The problem was, however, that whether she was just a friend or true love was a mystery. He never stopped to ask what she felt for him, sure she said that she loved him, but how could he not doubt it? He remembered the days of their journey together and thought about how it was only then that he was truly at peace, only then that the sunsets looked pure and clean. It was only then that the sound of someone’s voice was pleasing and happy than grating and angry.

Was that love?

“I don’t think that the question is of this girl’s thoughts, it’s probably a question of events. Were you sure that this was love?” Lance said while the boy sat up and put his head on his hands.

“Well, I really don’t know. It happened so fast and it was such a small thing I never gave it thought.” That sounds familiar… Lance thought. A little too familiar.

“Don’t give up, though. Love or not, this girl was important to you, and letting her go will only deepen the cut. Believe it or not, I think I just solved my own problem, too. Whatever you do, just keep true love to the adults, okay?” The two of them laughed as the boy rose from his seat, the wind blowing his jacket strings in its gentle hands.

“I don’t know whether I should thank you,” he said, his hand on his forehead blocking the bright orange sun. “I shouldn’t trust someone who has such low Tetris scores…” He ran away quickly, glancing back after every step at Lance. Instead of being annoyed, he was encouraged and revitalized. It was becoming a long day.
 

billy5772

SENIOR
“I’m fifteen, and my parents say its okay.”

its-it's

It was only then that the sound of someone’s voice was pleasing and happy than grating and angry.

There should be a "rather" in between "happy" and "than"

Besides those couple of mistakes, this chapter was very good. You've explored a different and interesting theme in each chapter thus far through conversations and it's been a very good read. The average length of your chapters is good enough for me but still kinda short relatively. I wouldn't suggest expanding them just to expand them though. If a chapter is done, it's done. Ya know? Well, is the next chapter the last? 'Cause didn't you say *checks earlier post* yeah. Four parts = four chapters? Well, if this is almost over, chapter 4 should be pretty good. Well, yup. This is still one of my favorite fics so keep it up!
 

Quackerdrill

say yes to love
First of all, I thank y'all for noticing those mistakes... Spellcheck doesn't catch everything! Now about the length; all my fics have very short chapters because when I read a fic, I just don't enjoy extremely long ones. I feel that for some people, having a ton of stuff to read may turn them off. It's also for dramatic effect, though, if there was more stuff going through Lance's mind, I would have wrote it, right? Now I do see how you may just want a little more, so that's why this is a trilogy. The third installment will hopefully fill everyones demand for a fleshed-out story. Trust me. Now, the final part...

4

The sun had set and Lance was feeling his eyes droop and his head fall. The wind had gotten chilly, and his light cape didn’t help much, as it floated in the wind like a flag. The lights nearby flickered on instantly as he saw yet another person approach the bench. Lance was not ready for talk, so he quickly closed his eyes and pretended to sleep, his hat on top of his face in a last ditch attempt to make himself seem to be in deep slumber.

It was a young woman with blonde hair and a bright purple sweatshirt who was approaching, and noticing the “sleeping” man nearby she softened her steps. Her purse was flopping against her back at every move she made, and by the time she had readied herself to sit down, it smacked Lance’s hat into the sand below. His expression was unmoved, and thus his eyes were open to the woman’s confused countenance.

“I bet you’re really sleepy…” she said sarcastically as she took her seat. Lance grabbed his hat off the ground and sat up, just enough to not look like he was still asleep. He then looked at the young woman, who had opened her purse and had begun eating a chocolate bar effortlessly. He looked into her blue eyes and then to the chocolate. It was dark chocolate, his favorite. The woman suddenly looked up.

“Don’t you mind? If I wanted to sit next to a creep, I would have gone to a Game Corner…” she wrapped her chocolate and stuffed it into her bag, much to Lance’s dismay.

The woman’s expression then went from annoyance to worry.
“Oh my gosh… that reminds me… I was supposed to Fly back to Celadon last week… oh no…”

Lance had forgotten about his prior vow of silence. “May I ask what you forgot and why it’s in Celadon?” The woman glared back.

“No, you may not, but it’s a bit late for that now. No, it’s just that my old job used to be there, and I was supposed to go back to clear all the papers. But I probably didn’t forget, I just told myself that I was too scared to go back and face what I had left.”

“What did you do over there?” Lance surprised himself over how talkative he had been this day.

The woman paused. “I sold the prizes at the Game Corner… I got fired because I sold the Porygon at an extremely low price. I felt so bad for all those people, though… wasting all that money on something they’d never afford… I had to do something.”

“That’s great! I may question those people’s habits, but they are trainers just like us, right? But besides that, having to face your fears is just something everyone has to confront. You’re going to have to go back no matter what.”

But in his heart, Lance knew one thing: that this had to do with him as well. It kept popping up in every conversation, that there were so many things that he had to question about his decision about Flannery. One of them was the question of facing the possible outcome of going back.

“You look troubled about something… girl trouble?” The woman asked. Lance was worried that this would come up. He straightened his back and got ready to wind the old tale.

“No, it’s just… I have a problem that has a similar solution. I made a decision, but I'm unsure if it was correct.”

“Why don’t you just use your own answer and face the facts? Huh?” The woman had obviously thought of Lance as a hypocrite.

“I would, but… it’s complicated. Maybe I should just… go back…”

Lance saw the writing on the wall. His own beliefs were twisted over a small dealing, and it was driving him insane. What he thought and what he did seemed to be polar opposites, and it had took complete strangers to understand what exactly he should do. Flannery became not just a friend in his mind, but a beacon that helped him through. He knew now what was needed of him, and how he was a complete idiot to have not found out on his own.

Lance got up, hat in tow, and stared out to sea. “Ever had the feeling that something needed to be done, and immediately? The kind of drive in your mind where you can’t stop to think of the consequences?” The woman appeared as she had an answer, but no words came from her mouth she just simply nodded and rose just as he had.

“Well, whatever you have on your mind, I wish you luck.” She leaned over to him and gently kissed his lips, then ran off and faded into the distance. Lance turned around, but saw nothing. He shook his head, as to knock some sense into it.

He then grasped a Pokeball from his side and threw it revealing an elegant dark blue creature with grand red wings and piercing eyes. He put his hand on it.

“You know where I want to go, Salamence,” he said, as the creature clawed up the sand, “you know.”

Lance moved himself onto the creature’s back, and then stared directly above him. In the moonlight he saw a cloud with the most wonderful design and texture of any of them. He sighed, and saw not a Pikachu, but a Raichu. Salamence started to flap its wings, and Lance readied for his trip. They sailed off into the distance with a single thought on their mind: unfinished business.
 

billy5772

SENIOR
Pretty good ending to this phase of the trilogy. I don't know what to say really as I'm a little tired and scattered feeling right now. Um,...I liked this chapter as much as the others and am anxious to see how things will turn out for Lance and Flannery. I'm thinking that it might not be a happy ending after all but what do I know? I have my theories about where this is going but I won't post them so that I won't ruin the surprise for other readers if I happen to be right. Well, great length for me as always. I agree that this bite size chapters are more easily digested than ones of more epic proportions and that has been a factor that got me to read the first part. Well, keep it up!

-Billy5772 has left the thread.
 

purple_drake

E/GL obsessed
I never completely read Destined Flames (>.< I can't imagine Lance falling in love, so romances which include him kinda turn me off) but this was touching in its own way; it shows just how difficult decisions can seem to be, only for you to realize they're actually so simple.
I loved how you had the Pikachu in the clouds (particularly in the second chappie when at the end he just goes, 'That one's a Pikachu' straight out of the blue XD) and in the end it changed into a Raichu. Being able to face your fears is indeed a sign of maturity, and there are many *adults* who are unable to do that. Great work.
 

Quackerdrill

say yes to love
it shows just how difficult decisions can seem to be, only for you to realize they're actually so simple.
I loved how you had the Pikachu in the clouds (particularly in the second chappie when at the end he just goes, 'That one's a Pikachu' straight out of the blue XD) and in the end it changed into a Raichu. Being able to face your fears is indeed a sign of maturity, and there are many *adults* who are unable to do that. Great work.
That's exactly what I was trying to convey, and big thanks for reading it. Oh, and about the Lance thing; It's not as gushy as you may think. I suggest you read it anyways. But don't listen to me, I'm kinda biased when it comes to my own works!! XD
 

billy5772

SENIOR
When do you think the next part of the trilogy will come out, quackerdrill?
 

Quackerdrill

say yes to love
billy5772 said:
When do you think the next part of the trilogy will come out, quackerdrill?
Hmmmm... let's say... June 24th. That way I can focus on the rest of school!
*starts writing so he can meet deadline*
 
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