I greet the bedrock as if it were an old friend. I let it feel welcome in my presence. I remind it of it's victories and losses, subtly downplaying any success it's ever had, I say cruel words in a kind voice. I push the poor thing deeper and deeper into despair, all the while doing my best to give off the impression that I am here to help. I tell it that I am sorry for my cruelty but it should it hear the truth, of course I'm not sorry and it's not strictly the truth but that's neither here nor there. I warn it that all it touches crumbles, king midas but gold's replaced with failure. I sit down nest to bedrock and I cry, I tell it I'll stay by it's side forever, even if that means tainting my life with bitter sorrow.
Then I'll fake my own death and leave the bedrock to ponder. If it ever sees me again I'll tell that I'm not really there, that it needs to let go of it's failing's lest they haunt it. I'll tell it's in hell, 'It's only hell because you're here bedrock, I know that's horrible but I'm afraid my friend it's true, it's only hell because you're here.'