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Dragoniteftw's Poetry Corner

Dragoniteftw

SWAGONITE
New poem in the OP

hope it lives up to the first one :)
 

Dragoniteftw

SWAGONITE
I don't approve of dissing Emolga, but funny poem.
Nice work.

hehe, I like him really it was just for comic affect. But I do find it unnecessary to have another electric pikachu look alike
 

Becoming

┓┏ 凵 =╱⊿┌┬┐
Ok, these are quite good :D Even though I dislike the Emolga bashing, it's still quite funny. The only thing you really need to look out for is proper grammer (mainly name capitalisation). You should read over that. Apart from name capitalisation ('cause that takes like two seconds for you to do) i've found some other mistakes,

4x weak against common pokes like Gurdurr.

I think "4x" should be written as "four times." But it's your choice, I guess.

But Ev training your speed is too essential.

I'm not actually sure what the proper spelling is, but i'm sure that ev is either all caps or neither caps. Doesn't really matter which one.

Dark/steel wasn't gamefreaks best move

gamefreaks should be Gamefreak's, it need an apostrophe 'cause they own it.
and the Base speed of 70 is something I'd improve

Even-though smogon members think your a joke.

smogon is a name, so that should be Smogon.

Dear emolga,

Emolga should be capitalised 'cause it's a title.

When I first saw you on the new pokemon page

pokemon needs a capital letter . . .

The fact I cannot use ground attacks is not my only complaint

Ok, so this is just a suggestion, change cannot to can't, IMO it makes it flow better.

Overall As a pokemon you're a pile of s***

As doesn't need a capital letter.

Ok. so overall, apart from the small grammer errors, this is quite well written, and I enjoyed 'em. Keep up the good work :D
 

NinjaScepSneasel

Reviewer and writer
These made me laugh with their awesomeness. It was a classic idea to write poetry on stuff like this, keep it up. Anyway, down to buisness. The first one had some classic lines about smogen and typing and stuff that I never would have thought of. Pure mastery.
And the emolga one... Actually, I've never seen a wild Emolga. I really liked the comedy things in there, like the sewing machine. Again, although I don't hate Emolga, it was still very good.

I won't bother pointing out the grammer as Kjt has already done so. I can't wait to see more of these.
 

Dragoniteftw

SWAGONITE
thanks NinjaScepSneasel, SGG and KJT

Wasn't my orginal intention to put any of these up so grammar wasn't my main concern, but I have checked most things that have been suggested.

Hopefully I can bring out some more in the near future, I am probably going to keep with the theme of reviewing the a Pokemon while trying to include touches of humor, and references to what competitive battlers think, also 'Smogon University' controls what people think about different pokemon which makes me laugh so I will use that idea again in the future.
 

Canto

Well-Known Member
I like these poems, they're really funny. :)
My favorite is the Emolga one, I definitely feel your pain on the shaking grass thing.
 

maxximuscree

Snorlax User
laughed when i saw the emongla and the bisharp poems.
 

SerenadeSP

My Loyal Feraligatr
The Chadellure poem basically sums up my thoughts on it. Very well thought out. The only line that I had a problem with is this:

Funny how dinner table lamps can put gengar to shame.

because it's a little longer than the others so it seems to break up the flow you had going. Not sure how you can fix that though. Maybe cut out the first few words and replace it with synonyms for them?
 

Dragoniteftw

SWAGONITE
The Chadellure poem basically sums up my thoughts on it. Very well thought out. The only line that I had a problem with is this:



because it's a little longer than the others so it seems to break up the flow you had going. Not sure how you can fix that though. Maybe cut out the first few words and replace it with synonyms for them?

thanks for the feedback and returning to the thread :)

I will make more soon so look out for them :)
 

PokemonRoss

Graphic Artist@17 :)
I love them!!
Especially the one about Emongla, as I too have that EXACT SAME PROBLEM!

Would you do a request if I asked for one? ^.^
 

Dragoniteftw

SWAGONITE
I love them!!
Especially the one about Emongla, as I too have that EXACT SAME PROBLEM!

Would you do a request if I asked for one? ^.^

well, I'm not sure how good it'll be, but seeing as you are also from SURREY i can take a request :)
 
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