• We're currently experiencing a minor issue with our email system preventing emails for new registrations and verifications going out. We're currently working to fix this
  • Be sure to join the discussion on our discord at: Discord.gg/serebii
  • If you're still waiting for the e-mail, be sure to check your junk/spam e-mail folders

Hoennshipping General Discussion

Status
Not open for further replies.
Marichi said:
Although, if that over protectiveness turns Brendan into a girlfriend-control-freak, than I'd have to disagree...but that wouldn't be hoennshipping now, would it?

Oh good. I guess these were more popular than I thought. Nah, anyone can hand out themes. I remember there were some good drabbles from our last thread. Hey, what ever happen to Shinndoh? The drabbles he wrote were epic.

@ CC: Thanks, and here I thought I lost my touch.
Agreed! I'm certain it wouldn't get to that point; we're trying to create characters with stylishly flawed personalities, but not to the point of being sociopaths. XD

Oh, of course they were! I suppose I'd try my hand sometime, but I would need lots of prep time, thanks to my annoyingly transient muse. ^^;; Yeah, I was wondering, too... he seems to have kinda disappeared off the face of the earth.

Oh, you're quite welcome. ^^

LH said:
I've improved in art a bit... so maybe I'll draw a few hoennshipping fanart :>.

And it's never to late to become friends.

Not PG...? For me, it could be anything. If you know what I mean ;D *pelvic thrust* Yeah, yeah?

... I've grown into a big pervert over these past 5 years.
I wouldn't mind seeing some of that. ^^ Whenever you're ready, of course.

I'm glad to hear it!

Glad to see someone else is willing to go there. XD

You certainly wouldn't be the only one; the other is currently replying to you, and I'll have you know that at least a couple of other people hear have dabbled as well (not saying who, for fear of retribution... xD).

@Kanta: Yes, Breezy does seem to be the only one still in top-form as of late... of course, with all the inspiration we're getting now, it shouldn't be that way for much longer. =D

Interesting story! I'm almost tempted to ask where it would've gone had it continued... but I understand that we're in mixed company, so I'm okay. XD'

Don't worry, I remember Christina. ^^ She was one of the only prominent OC's that wasn't one of us, so it wasn't too tough.

Ooh, if you do get around to that rewrite, I should like to see it sometime. I liked the original, so this should be great, too. ^^

Icy said:
Ohhh like Johnny's Entertainment's boys... Wouldn't have thought of that from such a random reference. but IMO, not many of them are actually that good looking o_O;; Some are quite yummy though XD

I just realized... you really like the whole alliteration thing... KK, CC, SS... @_@;;

Actually, not really... lol I only use it for crack... Generally works ^^;;
I myself have become more acquainted with them than I would've liked, thanks to the time I spent with Kyoto and Toge-chan over the last couple of summers; it's had quite an... effect on me, I must say. XDD

Really? Honestly, I never noticed until now. o_O;; Weird... but kinda cool, too.

Ah, I see. ^^;; Well, it certainly fulfills that role!

DS said:
LH - no remember DS? Just call me Joe or Saran now. Don't ask about the Saran nickname.... Oh man.. R rated Hoennshipping sounds more vulgar than interesting :O

Codeh - I base Brendan, 5 years ago off of my alter ego basically. Now I base him off of a kid in desperate need of adderall. LOLOLOLOLO

Gah I feel soooo young again and sooo corny at the same time but Im happy

New topic from str8 off my head - I wonder how they would talk in an IM session, no pervertingness intended.

Kanta - I believe this is going to be great, with open office and all these ideas and crazy things happening I should be able to get this one-shot in order. Of course a good bit o chapters... 4 or 5 (does dat still mean one shot?) Then again I have to make them into different characters, its hard as hell to not base them off HLBMA because it is definitely the best interpretation of hoennshipping.
It's okay; she seems to be the forgetful type. XDD Just kidding! I suppose it [R-rated Hoennshipping] can sound that way, but I think it's all in the presentation. I mean, I've seen one or two that were alright. ^^ (Don't ask for them; I'm pretty sure they've vanished into the ether of the Internet by now. XD)

Really? That's funny; back then, I kinda wrote him as an author-insert, too. Nowadays, he's more like an amalgamation of game/anime Brendan, Ruby, various characters from other series, and a few hideously exaggerated bits of my own personality. Yes, I think very hard when devising characters. XD

As Dawn would say, "No need to worry! =D". I'm pretty sure we've all felt like that at one point or another in this thread.

Ah, more topics! My slow brain needs more time to think. ^^;;

I kinda had trouble making them act different from Breezy's interpretation, too; one can't really help it, considering her work is awesome. ^^ I'm dedicated to making them my own, though, I so I try my best to stray away from her characterisations. While still respecting them, of course.
 

Dark Sentry

Kenta gud trainer
CC, i know you do not watch the abomination known as D&P. Should have done a spin off with Wally, May and ol' B-Boy. I would actually watch the TV show again, even with all the corniness.

Maybe I had a gutter mind on the R rated stuff. I can understand explicit language and use of alcohol and tobacco or something, but i think sexual related stuff would murder the rest of the kid i have in me.

How about Brendan playing online gaming on say a Wii, is over at May's house and looses to some guy in a game of Brawl, of course using ZZS >_> (XD)
Gets mad and slams the wiimote into the LCD screen, shattering it. What happens now?
May:.............. or The Maples:.....................................!
Brendan: Oh Sh--
Wow im one corny SOB
 
CC, i know you do not watch the abomination known as D&P. Should have done a spin off with Wally, May and ol' B-Boy. I would actually watch the TV show again, even with all the corniness.

Maybe I had a gutter mind on the R rated stuff. I can understand explicit language and use of alcohol and tobacco or something, but i think sexual related stuff would murder the rest of the kid i have in me.

How about Brendan playing online gaming on say a Wii, is over at May's house and looses to some guy in a game of Brawl, of course using ZZS >_> (XD)
Gets mad and slams the wiimote into the LCD screen, shattering it. What happens now?
May:.............. or The Maples:.....................................!
Brendan: Oh Sh--
Wow im one corny SOB
Don't worry, I definitely do not, except maybe once in a while, and just to marvel at what a trainwreck it's become. I just happen to have a soft spot for Dawn and her endearingly moe personality. Otherwise, the show suffers from a serious lack of Brendan, Wally, Lucas, and other worthwhile characters. xD But, I digress.

The cussing and drugs I can do without. >_< As for sex, yes, normally that would be childhood-killing. But, if done with suitable buildup and convincingly portrayed as an act of love and passion, it could just work. It'd be really hard to pull off, though.

Brendan always seems to get the short end of the stick in these scenarios. XD What about Brendan winning, and May being surprised when he acts gracious in victory instead of gloating?

Not much cornier than the rest of us, anyway. =P
 

Dark Sentry

Kenta gud trainer
Don't worry, I definitely do not, except maybe once in a while, and just to marvel at what a trainwreck it's become. I just happen to have a soft spot for Dawn and her endearingly moe personality. Otherwise, the show suffers from a serious lack of Brendan, Wally, Lucas, and other worthwhile characters. xD But, I digress.

The cussing and drugs I can do without. >_< As for sex, yes, normally that would be childhood-killing. But, if done with suitable buildup and convincingly portrayed as an act of love and passion, it could just work. It'd be really hard to pull off, though.

Brendan always seems to get the short end of the stick in these scenarios. XD What about Brendan winning, and May being surprised when he acts gracious in victory instead of gloating?

Not much cornier than the rest of us, anyway. =P
I'm a big man now, sex is like candy for most of us. It's just weird thinking sex and pokemon. Ever heard of the joke where pokemon where trainers and vice versa, the pokemon drop ash and misty off at a daycare, wouldnt you know it they find an egg? XD

Brendan: You played a fair game chap, but alas I bested you. Great game mahboi.

I'm not feeling that at all. Drama is way more funnier
 

Ice-Phoenix-chan

gone with the wind~
I myself have become more acquainted with them than I would've liked, thanks to the time I spent with Kyoto and Toge-chan over the last couple of summers; it's had quite an... effect on me, I must say. XDD

Really? Honestly, I never noticed until now. o_O;; Weird... but kinda cool, too.

Ah, I see. ^^;; Well, it certainly fulfills that role!


It's okay; she seems to be the forgetful type. XDD Just kidding! I suppose it [R-rated Hoennshipping] can sound that way, but I think it's all in the presentation. I mean, I've seen one or two that were alright. ^^ (Don't ask for them; I'm pretty sure they've vanished into the ether of the Internet by now. XD)
lol sounds... fun? I suppose you're sick of them by now?

I don't mind typing it... less work for me to find the letters XD

^^;;

Well, R-rated Hoenshipping would be kinda akward considering that they're like 10-13 or w/e (don't remember, some correct me) so... unless you make them older. Plus, this forum should be open and accessable to the public and we don't want to go corrupting kids now, do we?

DS said:
How about Brendan playing online gaming on say a Wii, is over at May's house and looses to some guy in a game of Brawl, of course using ZZS >_> (XD)
Gets mad and slams the wiimote into the LCD screen, shattering it. What happens now?
Then Norman will do the whole angry father thing an be all like "you're not dating my daughter/coming over again"
Then they'll have to meet in secret =)

CC said:
Brendan always seems to get the short end of the stick in these scenarios. XD What about Brendan winning, and May being surprised when he acts gracious in victory instead of gloating?
good call... maybe we should add that in... *out of ideas atm*
 
Icy said:
lol sounds... fun? I suppose you're sick of them by now?

I don't mind typing it... less work for me to find the letters XD

Well, R-rated Hoenshipping would be kinda akward considering that they're like 10-13 or w/e (don't remember, some correct me) so... unless you make them older. Plus, this forum should be open and accessable to the public and we don't want to go corrupting kids now, do we?

good call... maybe we should add that in... *out of ideas atm*
Yeah, I guess you could say that. XD

Well, if it's easier, that's good! ^^

Yes, that's rather true... ^^;; Of course, what I've seen usually did correct the age issue... regardless, your point stands. Perhaps that kind of stuff is best confined to outer reaches of the net.

Thanks. Yeah, I'm starting to run a bit low, too...

DS said:
I'm a big man now, sex is like candy for most of us. It's just weird thinking sex and pokemon. Ever heard of the joke where pokemon where trainers and vice versa, the pokemon drop ash and misty off at a daycare, wouldnt you know it they find an egg? XD

Brendan: You played a fair game chap, but alas I bested you. Great game mahboi.

I'm not feeling that at all. Drama is way more funnier
Of course! Yes, you do have a point, there. Er, no, I don't believe I've heard that one, but I definitely get it. XD

Just different kinds of drama, if you ask me. Yours is certainly funnier, I'll give it that. xD I was always one for the touchy-feely crap, though.
 

Dark Sentry

Kenta gud trainer
Of course! Yes, you do have a point, there. Er, no, I don't believe I've heard that one, but I definitely get it. XD

Just different kinds of drama, if you ask me. Yours is certainly funnier, I'll give it that. xD I was always one for the touchy-feely crap, though.
I can do Touchy stuff but I gotta leave them both with dignity. And Icy hits the spot with this is a child's playground not a perv-fest, but we tend to make it one anyway

I really just want to see a typical day with them, I say one being about 16 and the other 15, you choose. Go and have a walk in the park or maybe a heart to heart, anyone got a opinion?
 
I can do Touchy stuff but I gotta leave them both with dignity. And Icy hits the spot with this is a child's playground not a perv-fest, but we tend to make it one anyway

I really just want to see a typical day with them, I say one being about 16 and the other 15, you choose. Go and have a walk in the park or maybe a heart to heart, anyone got a opinion?
No one ever said anything about a lack of dignity. ^^ Yes, I'm definitely on her side with that now, although you do have a point about our occasional noncompliance...

I'd rather like that, too. After all the crazy stuff we've come up with, it might be refreshing for them to just relax and enjoy themselves. As for the age thing, that's rather murky territory. Only anime-May has a given age (10; not that anyone believes that, for obvious reasons. XD), while Brendan's could be anything. Ruby and Sapphire, on the other hand, are canonically 11 and 10, respectively. I, myself, typically imagine Brendan and May as being 13 and 12, though I do age them up from time to time as appropriate.
 

Healing-D-Vision

The Road of Life
It just makes more sense for Anime-Brendan to be at least one year older than May.

again, back to his first cameo, he was in a League match with rather strong Pokemon. I like to think that he had started at 10, like most others, and that he had started a year before May had. Although, that is a lot of power to gain in just one year, but that's what makes him a Prodigy(in my mind)

There is never an easy way to incorporate sexual scenes in something like this. I feel it's OK AS LONG AS IT IS DONE IN GOOD TASTE Which is almost never the case.

I have completely come around and fully support that Brendan has black hair and he wears a hat.

Makes me want to try at another HS drabble......

In defense of the D/P anime, it was already a trainwreck when the Hoenn series started, in fact, I see the D/P series as a vast improvement. Still not good, but not as bad as AG was.
 
It just makes more sense for Anime-Brendan to be at least one year older than May.

again, back to his first cameo, he was in a League match with rather strong Pokemon. I like to think that he had started at 10, like most others, and that he had started a year before May had. Although, that is a lot of power to gain in just one year, but that's what makes him a Prodigy(in my mind)

There is never an easy way to incorporate sexual scenes in something like this. I feel it's OK AS LONG AS IT IS DONE IN GOOD TASTE Which is almost never the case.

I have completely come around and fully support that Brendan has black hair and he wears a hat.

Makes me want to try at another HS drabble......

In defense of the D/P anime, it was already a trainwreck when the Hoenn series started, in fact, I see the D/P series as a vast improvement. Still not good, but not as bad as AG was.
You're right, it does, considering, like you said, the level of skill he seems to show in his few onscreen appearances.

Seeing that part, I actually thought that maybe he was already the same age as Ash by that point, and that he had been a trainer for a while, which both explains his skill and fits with the description from the game of him having "an extensive history as a trainer already". The "prodigy" explanation is cool, too, though, and adds a bit of extra colour to his character.

Quite true. Even a lot of so-called "professional" romance authors seem to screw that part up. It's probably best left alone.

Hm... to each their own, I suppose. I stick by the "it's his hair" theory; I guess I've just seen way too much Japanese fanart of him looking extremely cool with white hair. xD

Go ahead! We always enjoy reading those.

You do have a bit of a point. There are considerably less painful things to see in the D/P series, but I still wouldn't consider it on the same level as the Kanto episodes. But, of course, that's neither here nor there.
 

azngirlLH

Battle Pyramid Champion
xD Nono, Christina is my original character in a fanfic I wrote. She wants Brendan all to herself. :p

LAWL. She could want anything. ;) Not that I'm implying anything over PG...

*gets whacked by Brendan and May* x_X;

EDIT: Hey, LH, is it alright if I use/rewrite your old fic "The Old Beloved Camera?" :D
Of course :O I deleted all my fics years ago... but if you actually still have it... then wow o.o.

Marichi - Don't worry I just need more details for a better build up.... I'm kinda going off how my Drama year was, using the teachers name and attitude. She always called me a jackass :) I didn't see no football thing or w/e in the old thread but your probably right

Kanta - I believe this is going to be great, with open office and all these ideas and crazy things happening I should be able to get this one-shot in order. Of course a good bit o chapters... 4 or 5 (does dat still mean one shot?) Then again I have to make them into different characters, its hard as hell to not base them off HLBMA because it is definitely the best interpretation of hoennshipping.

LH - :( no remember DS? Just call me Joe or Saran now. Don't ask about the Saran nickname.... Oh man.. R rated Hoennshipping sounds more vulgar than interesting :O

Codeh - I base Brendan, 5 years ago off of my alter ego basically. Now I base him off of a kid in desperate need of adderall. LOLOLOLOLO

Gah I feel soooo young again and sooo corny at the same time but Im happy

New topic from str8 off my head - I wonder how they would talk in an IM session, no pervertingness intended.

Yo quiero reunirse con mis amigos y amigas! Yo quiero TacoBell, tambien.
... I don't remember you at all, sorry T_T.
 

Healing-D-Vision

The Road of Life
Originally posted by Summer Sturgeon
Seeing that part, I actually thought that maybe he was already the same age as Ash by that point, and that he had been a trainer for a while, which both explains his skill and fits with the description from the game of him having "an extensive history as a trainer already". The "prodigy" explanation is cool, too, though, and adds a bit of extra colour to his character.
I love the Prodigy angle, I'm using that in my current project. Just like recently in the D/P ep's where May returns, she was apparently given the name "The Hoenn Princess" in Jhoto

so, my angle will be "The Hoenn Princess Vs. The Hoenn Prodigy"

Originally posted by Summer Sturgeon
Hm... to each their own, I suppose. I stick by the "it's his hair" theory; I guess I've just seen way too much Japanese fanart of him looking extremely cool with white hair. xD
Once you show me good art of him with white hair, I will keep seeing stuff as awesome as this.(Granted, it's Franticshipping)
 

Sequoia

Well-Known Member
Ahhhh cbb multiquoting. :3

@CC: We got brainwashed into thinking he's got white hair. XD I still liek the idea of Brendan getting his hair accidentally bleached when he was younger, though~ (who came up with that? :eek: )
@Icy: If we started doing R-rated stuff, we'd so get kicked out of the running for "Most Friendly Shipping Thread". :B (even though we probably got kicked off years ago..)
@Kanta: O: she could be asking for that famed second button.
@Marichineesy: B-boy's totally not touching her butt. :3 Perfect gentlemen he is.
@HD Vision: You know what my absolute favourite part about Ruby's hair is? The little piece that sticks up~ 8DD

--

:) About the Festival.. I've forgotten all the rules and things we set down, but if we have a festival every week it won't be special. So I propose.. SEASONAL FESTIVALS! Poetic and just often enough to make it awesome. :D The only problem would be which season, cos I'm Southern Hemisphere.. and the rest of you are Northern.

(and I'm essentially the HSer who doesn't write so I can't fill up my post with a drabble. :B)

[IMG200]http://img520.imageshack.us/img520/1605/hsfest.th.jpg[/IMG200]
 

Dark Sentry

Kenta gud trainer
CC - You and me both for the white hair! It was that color, at least to me.

HDV - I never really gave the american anime to pokemon a try. I think after the Kanto, or first season I was almost full of how corny the show was. Kind of like what 4Kids tends to do, and Funamation with DBZ. Even in the games, there was always something that could have been said different, but I could get past it quick via the b or a button. I pictured Brendan in the cameos to be about 14 or 15, given his height. And we all know he could kick Ash's *** in a real battle. How long does it take him to become a Pokemon Master, from age ten in 98 til now. 11 years. WOW. too think I chose you for a Halloween costume -.-; If the anime was more... adjusted to my age(endless perv possibilities with Brock LOL) I would enjoy it as much as I enjoy Bleach or DeathNote. A little bit of language and suggestive themes never hurt anyone.

LH - sssssssaaaaaadddddfffffffffffffaccccceeeeeee. Oh well at least you don't remember the agrivating me :D.
 

Ice-Phoenix-chan

gone with the wind~
HDV said:
It just makes more sense for Anime-Brendan to be at least one year older than May.

again, back to his first cameo, he was in a League match with rather strong Pokemon. I like to think that he had started at 10, like most others, and that he had started a year before May had. Although, that is a lot of power to gain in just one year, but that's what makes him a Prodigy(in my mind)
Yes it would but I wouldn't want Brendan to be too old... creepy older guys for just-out-of-pre-teens-girls is :S

(OT but did you know Sailor Moon is like 13 and Tuxedo Mask is like 20? that's just creeeeepy... get the situation?)

Plus, I like him being a prodigy XD Makes him cooler and gives him bragging rights to be cocky XD
Giving him 2-3 years is okay, IMO.

You're right, it does, considering, like you said, the level of skill he seems to show in his few onscreen appearances.

Seeing that part, I actually thought that maybe he was already the same age as Ash by that point, and that he had been a trainer for a while, which both explains his skill and fits with the description from the game of him having "an extensive history as a trainer already". The "prodigy" explanation is cool, too, though, and adds a bit of extra colour to his character.
How old is Ash now (or at least during the Hoenn Arc)? o_O;; While I'm at that... what about Wally (around same age as May?), Shuu (May's age +1) and Steven (16-20? more towards 20 but then May's age would have to be bumped up for fic purposes XD)?

=HDVI love the Prodigy angle, I'm using that in my current project. Just like recently in the D/P ep's where May returns, she was apparently given the name "The Hoenn Princess" in Jhoto

so, my angle will be "The Hoenn Princess Vs. The Hoenn Prodigy"

Once you show me good art of him with white hair, I will keep seeing stuff as awesome as this.(Granted, it's Franticshipping)
It is an intersting angle but a word of caution against Mary Sues and... I don't remember the guy version of it... lol But its a nice title XD Sorta cheesy but who doesn't love cheese?

BTW, how was she named the "Hoenn Princess"? Contest successes?

Hmm... convincing and a very persuasive fan art you have there... but I do still like him better with white hair XD

Seq said:
@Icy: If we started doing R-rated stuff, we'd so get kicked out of the running for "Most Friendly Shipping Thread". :B (even though we probably got kicked off years ago..)
Yes, I have realized so that is why I just didn't bother to mention it/bother commenting on it after my feeble attempt of rejustification and ending it there. Probably shouldn't have brought that into the thread in the first place. -_-;;

@your pic lol so much for the anti-R-rated-ness =P
 

Toge-chan

Lalala~~
OKAY. Too many things to quote. Screw it. XD

@ CC: Why wouldn't they want to know? D: Pretty boys are always a good thing. :p
@ Kanta: I think it has to do with Kyo, because I haven't talked to Kam at all. D: *runs* AND I don't mind if it's more than PG. *perv*
@ Icy: I don't dislike any of them, but I agree some have better looks than others, haha.
@ HDV: I don't think there's a way to properly insert sexual content to pokemon. XD Idk. AND OH GOD.
@ Jane: Haha. B&M in the pool. So cute and amusing. And I agree! We should make the festival seasonal, that would make them more interesting.

I'm guessing he'd be around 13/14 by the Hoenn arch? I don't know. D:
 

Kanta-chan

Well-Known Member
Let's stop talking about rated R. ^^;;; NEW TOPIC.


D: My post is too long to put here. I made a teaser for Hoennshipping Chaos and a spin-off from LH's old fic.

See story here.
Any comments? O:


I'm thinking about making it into a fic. Btw, I'm aiming for a humor fic. P: There aren't enough Hoennshipping humor out there. I'm so bad at fluff now.
 

Kana

kisses
---

*can't finish the rest* ;_; It won't be PG.
Oh dear, Christina's such a creeper. Poor B-boy.

The cussing and drugs I can do without. >_< As for sex, yes, normally that would be childhood-killing. But, if done with suitable buildup and convincingly portrayed as an act of love and passion, it could just work. It'd be really hard to pull off, though.

Brendan always seems to get the short end of the stick in these scenarios. XD What about Brendan winning, and May being surprised when he acts gracious in victory instead of gloating?
I don't mind cussing unless it's absolutely... uh, overwhelming and unnecessary (i.e. multiple cuss words in a row repeatedly). As for sex, I'm with Dark Sentry on this one--Pokemon + sex = ....... incompatible xD

A:) About the Festival.. I've forgotten all the rules and things we set down, but if we have a festival every week it won't be special. So I propose.. SEASONAL FESTIVALS! Poetic and just often enough to make it awesome. :D The only problem would be which season, cos I'm Southern Hemisphere.. and the rest of you are Northern.

(and I'm essentially the HSer who doesn't write so I can't fill up my post with a drabble. :B)

[IMG200]http://img520.imageshack.us/img520/1605/hsfest.th.jpg[/IMG200]
Yeah, hemispheres are a problem :/ How 'bout we just have our festival based on a "month," and throw in our own contributions based on what that month means to us? Like, May (the month!) to me means flowers, schoolwork, warmth... but it might mean something totally different to you, which would be interesting. :D

<3 THE BANNER! Lavaridge eh ;) Gah, I miss R/S/E.

(OT but did you know Sailor Moon is like 13 and Tuxedo Mask is like 20? that's just creeeeepy... get the situation?)

Plus, I like him being a prodigy XD Makes him cooler and gives him bragging rights to be cocky XD
O__O Whoa! I didn't know that! That's REALLY creepy. Isn't that illegal? xDD

Mmmm yeah. Smart jerk? Not too jerky though :]

@KANTA: I'll comment~ ^-^

Wally is up a tree
Up in a tree, perhaps?

let's just say that Wally is sent
If he is already beat up, shouldn't it be written in past tense?

An hour pass.
Passes or passed, which tense are you going to use?

Overall: Good, just be careful with the tenses; you seem to switch them a lot.

I vaguely remember this story~ I never imagined Wally could be so bold. xD It must've taken him forever to climb that tree :p

You're making me excited for Hoennshipping Chaos! Are we going to send in new OCs?

- - -

Writing exercises to ease me back into descriptive writing... still need to work on dialogue. T_T

Thunder

Shadows danced on her shoulders as she twirled, singing dreamily as the wondrous ribbons of silver rain coiled down. She held his heart in one hand, and his hand in the other as she danced, spotlighted by the streaks of white lightning and awarded with the roaring applause of thunder.

“Isn’t this dangerous?” he’d inquired nervously, the sweat in his palm disguised as rain.

She had responded with a coy smile and a mischievous laugh, gripping his hand even more tightly and dragging him along as she pranced through the empty streets, her singing and his shouting thundering rhythmically, muffled by the sound of gently falling rain.

Freeze

He had those deep crimson eyes that pierced her skin and speared her chest. At a moment, there was fire, melting the glass to his soul for her to see. For a moment, then, she would recall the love that once came spilling out of those ruby chambers and the soft, fragile heart she found beneath his iciness. But, as soon as the windows opened, they were shut once again—once and for all. She felt chills tingle her spine. All of the affection in her memories disappeared with the return of his cruel, heartbreakingly passive eyes.

He held her heart in that frozen gaze. He could make her rumple and tear, scream and suffer, weep and remember as the love flooded back… as he stomped on her, pulled her hair, let her feel the warmth of his hand for a moment. She called his name, and then he crushed her once and for all.

- - -

Critique? Comments?
 
HDV said:
I love the Prodigy angle, I'm using that in my current project. Just like recently in the D/P ep's where May returns, she was apparently given the name "The Hoenn Princess" in Jhoto

so, my angle will be "The Hoenn Princess Vs. The Hoenn Prodigy"

Once you show me good art of him with white hair, I will keep seeing stuff as awesome as this.(Granted, it's Franticshipping)
It actually does work quite well. For the sake of consistency, I think I'll stick with the veteran angle for my own project, but the prodigy approach definitely has my support now.

Matching titles? I like it!

You're on.

Icy said:
Yes it would but I wouldn't want Brendan to be too old... creepy older guys for just-out-of-pre-teens-girls is :S

(OT but did you know Sailor Moon is like 13 and Tuxedo Mask is like 20? that's just creeeeepy... get the situation?)

Plus, I like him being a prodigy XD Makes him cooler and gives him bragging rights to be cocky XD
Giving him 2-3 years is okay, IMO.
It's not that weird! I mean, I was three years older than-- well, okay, I won't unload my dirty laundry in the thread again, but you know what/who I mean. ^^;; I'd say that, as long as one is not a legal adult while the other isn't, a slight age difference isn't so bad.

Good point! Although, I still kinda like the idea of the idea of an older, jaded Brendan with lots of experience and such... I dunno, both ideas work. ^^
I'd agree with that, too.

As for Ash's age, I'm pretty sure he'd be about 14-15, assuming each region equals one year. And, concerning May's title, I'm almost certain it's from Contest victories.

@Jane: Excellent banner! I especially like the picture and captions; very cute, yet funny, too. XD

I also like the seasonal festival idea. There is, of course, the hemisphere problem, but we should be able to work around it. ^^

@Kanta: Nice work. ^^ Basically, what Cherri said about the tense is all you need to worry about.

@Cherri: Your drabble's great, too! A bit too descriptive at times, though. I know that's what you're aiming for, but sometimes too much purple prose causes a story to sound overblown and detracts from its quality. All in all, though, I still liked it.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.
Top