Danisuke_San
Member
How would you describe cold wind around blowing around a person
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How to describe...
- Thread starter Danisuke_San
- Start date
Astinus
Well-Known Member
"The wind howled around [blah]. [Blah] shivered. The wind was cold, and it froze [blah]."
Not a lot there, but the best I can do with what you have given me. I mean, is there snow? Rain? Just a windy day? Or is it some giant mecha making the wind? By the way, [blah] is where the person's name is supposed to go. :/ Also would be helpful to know what the character is wearing.
But, in my not-too-important opinion, it's not a good idea to ask people how to describe something. Then the story becomes a little less yours. Use your imagination to see the scene in your eyes.
Not a lot there, but the best I can do with what you have given me. I mean, is there snow? Rain? Just a windy day? Or is it some giant mecha making the wind? By the way, [blah] is where the person's name is supposed to go. :/ Also would be helpful to know what the character is wearing.
But, in my not-too-important opinion, it's not a good idea to ask people how to describe something. Then the story becomes a little less yours. Use your imagination to see the scene in your eyes.
Danisuke_San
Member
Yes [blah]! lol
Well thanks! I'll follow your advice
Well thanks! I'll follow your advice
Saffire Persian
Now you see me...
I'll assume the character's human. XD
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For example: Viktor couldn't help but shiver. The temperature had lowered considerably in the past few hours as the city prepared for heavy snow. A whipper-whorl of freezing air twisted around Viktor's body unmercifully, shrieking as it went past, leaving an unpleasant chill in its wake.
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For example: Viktor couldn't help but shiver. The temperature had lowered considerably in the past few hours as the city prepared for heavy snow. A whipper-whorl of freezing air twisted around Viktor's body unmercifully, shrieking as it went past, leaving an unpleasant chill in its wake.
Shrike Flamestar
Video Game Addict
Hmm, perhaps something along this line...
“As the harsh wind whipped around his body, rustling his loose clothes and making his teeth chatter, Shrike couldn’t help but wonder why had only packed light, short-sleeved shirts for his entire Pokémon training journey. Crossing his arms and grabbing his shoulders, Shrike tried to shrug off and overcome the cold in the vain hope that the weather would turn nicer within just a few minutes. Alas, his unspoken pleas went unheard, God taking the chance to laugh in Shrike’s face by instead sending a powerful, icy-cold gust directly at him, head-on. Moaning to himself and wondering why God hated him so much, Shrike braced his body against the wind as it washed over and around him in a wave of frigid pain that must have lasted for what seemed like several minutes.”
I should write like that more often...
Really, something like this is all up to your writing style. As you can see, my example is drastically different than Hanako Tabris’ or Saffire Persian’s, each of whose was different from each other’s as well.
“As the harsh wind whipped around his body, rustling his loose clothes and making his teeth chatter, Shrike couldn’t help but wonder why had only packed light, short-sleeved shirts for his entire Pokémon training journey. Crossing his arms and grabbing his shoulders, Shrike tried to shrug off and overcome the cold in the vain hope that the weather would turn nicer within just a few minutes. Alas, his unspoken pleas went unheard, God taking the chance to laugh in Shrike’s face by instead sending a powerful, icy-cold gust directly at him, head-on. Moaning to himself and wondering why God hated him so much, Shrike braced his body against the wind as it washed over and around him in a wave of frigid pain that must have lasted for what seemed like several minutes.”
I should write like that more often...
Really, something like this is all up to your writing style. As you can see, my example is drastically different than Hanako Tabris’ or Saffire Persian’s, each of whose was different from each other’s as well.
Psychic
Really and truly
Danisuke_San, it would really help if you were more specific. For example, specify if you're writing if first or third person point of view. Tell us who the character is; male or female, long or short hair, clothing they might be wearing, you even have to tell us what species it is.
A good way to describe a scene like that would be something like this, imo at least:
A sudden gust of wind stirred up Alexandra's long curly hair, blowing it all over her face so it got in her eyes and mouth. Spitting out the brown locks, she wrapped her bare arms around her torso to keep from shivering as the bitter winds slashed at her unprotected body without mercy. She silently cursed herself for not taking the jacket her mother had offered her.
All rights to Psychic, no stealing please.
~Psychic
A good way to describe a scene like that would be something like this, imo at least:
A sudden gust of wind stirred up Alexandra's long curly hair, blowing it all over her face so it got in her eyes and mouth. Spitting out the brown locks, she wrapped her bare arms around her torso to keep from shivering as the bitter winds slashed at her unprotected body without mercy. She silently cursed herself for not taking the jacket her mother had offered her.
All rights to Psychic, no stealing please.
~Psychic
Danisuke_San
Member
That was cool! Thanks for all you guys. And if you want details:
He is 14 year old, and his name is Dani Niwa. His spiky,amber hair reached down to about half way down his neck, and about half an inch above his eyes. He wears his signature black shirt with teh collar sticking up over a black velvet belt that seperates the night sky black of his shirt, from the plain blue of his jeans. He wears black and white running shoes along with black sweatbands. He has a small pearl around his neck he obtained from his parents. His black and yellow backpack goes over his shoulders.
Theres an image I whipped up for the description, I forget which person is which. So heres an example,:
“Yeah, yeah...” Dani said still half asleep. About five minutes later Dani poked his head through his cover and saw the sun and almost immediately jumped up. He put his covers back on his bed. He looked at the bed and thought to himself,
Thats also alittel preview of the fanfic I'm working on
He is 14 year old, and his name is Dani Niwa. His spiky,amber hair reached down to about half way down his neck, and about half an inch above his eyes. He wears his signature black shirt with teh collar sticking up over a black velvet belt that seperates the night sky black of his shirt, from the plain blue of his jeans. He wears black and white running shoes along with black sweatbands. He has a small pearl around his neck he obtained from his parents. His black and yellow backpack goes over his shoulders.
Theres an image I whipped up for the description, I forget which person is which. So heres an example,:
“Yeah, yeah...” Dani said still half asleep. About five minutes later Dani poked his head through his cover and saw the sun and almost immediately jumped up. He put his covers back on his bed. He looked at the bed and thought to himself,
Thats also alittel preview of the fanfic I'm working on
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Oh. Goodness. >_>;
Really. If you write description like how everyone above me writes (all descriptive and la de da about it), then feel free to rant on about the wind. Or if the wind symbolizes something or plays an important role in the 'fic. Because that will be truly awkward if you have some parts described okay like the town and whatnot but BAM! COLD WIND!
The only thing you really have to say is like "A sharp, cold breeze whipped around [insert character's name here] as he trudged along the unkempt trail."
LaTeR dAyZ!
Really. If you write description like how everyone above me writes (all descriptive and la de da about it), then feel free to rant on about the wind. Or if the wind symbolizes something or plays an important role in the 'fic. Because that will be truly awkward if you have some parts described okay like the town and whatnot but BAM! COLD WIND!
The only thing you really have to say is like "A sharp, cold breeze whipped around [insert character's name here] as he trudged along the unkempt trail."
LaTeR dAyZ!