How would Pokemon attacks be in real life?

[Gloryus]

Skull Bash: One devastating headbutt, will break bones.
Air Cutter: Wind moving incredibly fast, slashing the skin causing blood loss.
Thrash: Reckless assault by being attacked indiscriminately with punches, slaps and kicks.

 

[Kharma]

lol Silverwindstudios..I just ninja-ed you.lol..Yuh night daze would be destructive.
But wouldn't dark pulse be almost the same since it has almost the same power and it is of the same type? And if you see its animation in pbr battles then you will see that it is even depicted as a shock wave.

But oh well I think that every and i mean EVERY attack would either kill you instantly or injure you so severely that you would die from the injuries or survive with life-long consequences eg paralysis,blindness(flash cannon or solar beam...if you survived),psychological traumas(psywave,confusion)...

 

[PrismaticPrincessAnna]

Lulz, Pay Day would be epic to see how a Meowth uses it and money comes outta nowhere xD nya

 

[char char]

Explosion: See Al-Qaeda handbook Chapter 7 Page 343

Flare Blitz: See Al-Qaeda handbook Chapter 34 Page 1337

Sky Attack: See Al-Qaeda handbook Chapter 69 Page 2401

Selfdestruct: See Al-Qaeda handbook appendix "Variants of Explosion"

This XD
Haha oh wow

 

[Amaranth]

@ Amaranth :
1. Okay,you are not immature while all of us are.And if you fail to find this entertaining then make me a favor and get out of this thread.If you don't like the thread simply don't come in here again.And if you found it immature and boring from the beginning then why did you visit the thread and posted as well?So it's really not my fault if you don't like it.I find it entertaining and this thread is for people who like it.I didn't force you to come and post in my thread.You are either trying to act clever and mature while you really aren't since you react like that or idk what else.Never visit this thread again if you are not planning on replying seriously and I give you my word that nobody is gonna miss you.Just leave. If you don't like it then no point on arguing in here.

Listen, I have never said that this thread was boring; I am enjoying this discussion. I only said that it was disturbing, which I do not see how you could possibly disagree with this. I have never claimed that I was coerced, please stop accusing me of things that are not true.

I'm not trying to act clever or mature, I am just trying to explain why I do not agree with you. I am beyond finding this kind of humour funny, perhaps because yes, I am more mature or because I just don't share your sense of humour. My reaction doesn't make me immature, I feel that you should look back over the discussion we have had and actually ask yourself is this is a fair comment.

You have no right to speak to me like this, so please don't. I have been respectful to you throughout this thread, and do not expect this kind of response. I am not arguing with you, I am merely discussing your thread and your responses to my thoughts. I don't particularly wish to argue with you either, so don't suggest that I do. Nobody is going to miss me? That's so sad, I just despair at the idea of not being missed on Serebii. All of my real life friends just pale in comparison to you excellent people.

2. I didn't say that being either sensitive or compassionate is bad in any way.In fact it is really good to be compassionate as you feel what others feel and you can be really supportive.I just said that you are either sensitive or compassionate because only if you are like this in an extreme point makes you react the way you did.

This is hardly a problem; I am not making it one, and you shouldn't either.

@ 3. I would prefer 'A' ..A poor attempt at sarcasm.And it was actually good

If you are the only one who thinks that your joke was funny, that is a pretty good indication that it actually wasn't.

You've also made this thread twice, as these threads seem to be effectively the same.

 

[Eternal Draconic]

Judgement:

All evil humans are destroyed. Painfully. Slowly. With a moustache.

 

[Kharma]

@ Eternal Draconic : haha..with a mustache..epic..hhahaha

And Amaranth,I am not going to continue this discussion with you.Just answer if you really have fun.

 

[Silvershark]

"Gyarados used Aqua Tail!"
"It's Super Effective!"
-Charizard slumps to the ground with a broken spine-
"Go Durant!"
"Durant used Guillotine!"
"It's a One Hit KO!"
-Gyarados's beheaded body writhers on the ground-
"Go Chandelure!"
"Chandelure used Fire Blast!"
"It's Super Effective!"
-Durant is reduced to a molten puddle of metal and burnt flesh-
"Go Dialga! Finish this!"
"Dialga used Roar of Time!"
"Critical Hit"
-All that remains of Chandelure is a horrendously disfigured heap. Residual temporal micro-fissures proceed to unravel the fabric of time-

Suffice it to say, Pokemon would cease being a 'kids game' if the moves were more realistic.

 

[Eternal Draconic]

^ 100% agreed.

 

[darkrai4]

Hammer Arm: you would get smacked in the head with a hammer-like arm using colossal strenght. This would break your cranium, back, feet and column in little pieces thus killing you instantly

 

[Buchou]

People wouldn't live long if attacks were real. Quite a painful existence Pokemon live.

 

[Metagross Guy]

Destructive, imagine a hyper beam hitting some building.Damn.

 

[MegSuicune251]

Explosion: an atomic explosion that would literally kill anything within a 2 mile radius. NEVER EVER USE THIS MOVE.

Psychic: "Woo-hoo! I'm flying!"

Roar of Time: Basically ripping apart the Space-Time Continuum. Dont use this move either. Seriously.

 

[Turtlestarf]

Basically, we'd all be dead.

 

[*Jean Grey*]

Don't forget about Curse! It either you stick yourself with pins (for the Ghost version) or shout swear words! XD

 

[Kharma]

lol yeah curse would be horrible.you wouldn't be able to avoid it.it would be a certain death.imagine only one gengar cursing a whole city..the whole city would be dead by the next day.

 

[RoySceptile]

What about Explosion?The world would be at war.Explosion here, Autodestruct there,Eruption somewhere else...

 

[abrar14]

^lol world war 3

 

[Kharma]

You know what? Pokemon would beat our *** easily in real world.I mean watch this episode with venipedes.Only a colon of venipedes were able to cause complete havoc and destroy everything with their sludge bomb.ONLY VENIPEDES!!Imagine millions of EACH pokemon.And I also think that for some pokemon it wouldn't even be necessary to use their attacks since only with their special abilities they would be able to kill many.Skuntanks with their horrible,toxic stench.It is a natural poison gas but worse because it also smells awful.They would kill millions only by walking by.Most ghost type pokemon wouldn't even be forced to use shadow ball etc because they could easily just drain our life force in seconds,steal our soul and other terrible things.Also,Pokemon that can summon sandstorms,hailstorms and generally harmful weather would kill us all only by just standing there.I wonder why some people even think that humans would win.Because,I asked such a question an many people said humans would win.I mean,only a bunch of venipedes(VENIPEDES!Do you believe that?) almost destroyed a whole city..

 

[Silvershark]

^That's why in the games people befriended pokemon. It was a matter of survival.