In the Middle of the Road
Rated: G (fo' gangsta! Or... general audiences >.>)By: Breezy
Genre: Something o.o
Just a quick little one-shot I thought of when driving home earlier. =3 It's not necessarily funny (which I could of prolly turned this easily into a humor fic but . . . whatever). So we'll just shove it under general for now. Enjoy.
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In the middle of the road lay something dead.
It wasn’t often that Tyler cared for the unfortunate road kill that wandered about at the wrong place at the wrong time and was bewitched by the magical illumination that is car headlights, but the poor, rotting corpse that cars rushed past without a second thought tugged at his heart strings.
Being that it was close to midnight and the road from Slateport to Mauville was usually a more desolate one, Tyler pulled over to the side of the road, pebbles crunching underneath the tires. His engine halted to a stop as he turned if off and pulled out the key. He opened his door, climbed out of his car, and slammed it shut before looking both ways to cross the street. The only thing for miles were fall's dead leaves that scattered across the asphalt road thanks to the light breeze that blew to the east.
Tyler walked over to the dead body and kneeled down to get a closer look, thanking Latios that the wind blew the corpse’s smell away from him and that the wet grass overwhelmed his nostrils. Although the only source of light was the golden-orange streetlights that shined down from above and the pale silver moonlight, Tyler was able to tell that the thing was black and curled up in a ball in what seemed to be a desperate attempt to save itself from being a car adornment. He figured it was a Poochyena, and a young one at that due to its small size.
“Poor thing,” he muttered sympathetically. Building up courage, Tyler took one of his index fingers and poked it, jumping back onto his rear as soon as he touched it, shivers running up and down his spine. “I guess I should bury it . . . I mean, that is the proper thing to do than having it be run over until it’s mashed into the road . . . right?”
Tyler looked to the other side of the road where two lone trees stood, their branches groaning, the leaves crinkling and scratching against each other.
“Perfect! That spot is a nice place to bury someone where it will be protected from the sun! But I am going to need some help digging a hole. Hmm I guess Mightyena could help me.”
Tyler stood up and unhooked a Pokeball from his belt. He threw the red and white sphere into the air, their colors blurring together as the ball spun and a blast of light exploded from it. The light landed on the ground and started to fade, revealing a black, furry, dog-like being with sharp teeth and eerie red eyes. It wrinkled its nose as it sniffed the air, its ears flattening back as he sat on the street, eyeing his trainer wearily.
“Sweet Mightyena,” said Tyler in a soothing voice as he rubbed the Mightyena behind the ears. “Good Mightyena. See this thing here?” He motioned toward the road kill. “It was hit by a car, the poor thing. But no one seemed to care to move it. But I do. I care! And so should you!”
Mightyena looked up from his trainer down to the road kill. He bent over to sniff it, even prodding it with his cold, wet nose.
Tyler gasped and pulled Mightyena up by the ruff of his neck. “Don’t do that, Mightyena! Anyways, I want you to dig a small hole over there between those two trees.”
The hyena Pokemon looked at his trainer confused. He knew that Tyler was a crazy one, but this was truly a bizarre request.
“Just do it, Mightyena. Can’t you tell this is part of your kin? Don’t you want to give it your respect?”
Mightyena snorted and turned his head to the side, refusing to listen to his half crazy trainer where wind seemed to blow through one ear and out the other.
"Darnit Mightyena!” Tyler rummaged through his pockets and pulled out his wallet, flipping through it and took out a tiny metal pink heart split down the middle into a diamond shape only to reconnect at the bottom. “Do you see this? I control you with this!”
Mightyena rolled his eyes and walked slowly over to the space between the two trees, his head bowed down. When the land changed from hard, rocky asphalt to soft, green grass, Mightyena patted the dirt twice before starting to dig a small hole, two feet deep and two feet wide. He would do anything to shut his whiny trainer up.
After Tyler watched his Pokemon dig the hole and summoned it back to his side, a problem aroused to his thoughts. How was he going to bring the body to the hole? He was awfully squeamish of touching it and he didn’t want Mightyena’s wet nose to goad it on into the hole.
Searching the area around him, Tyler spotted two long, thin branches that broke off a tree to the side of the road. Picking them up, he attempted to pick up the body in a chopstick-like manner which proved harder than he thought. But nevertheless, Tyler managed to cart the body to the hole, dropping it a couple of times and making himself look like a fool, walking about with his knees turned in and his feet turned out. He ignored the amused snorts that came from his Mightyena behind him and promptly began to throw dirt over the corpse as soon as he got it into the hole, patting the dirt flat when the job was complete.
“There,” he said, wiping beads of sweat off his forehead, flicking flecks of dirt into his hair. “That is that. A job well done if I dare say so myself. What do you think, Mightyena?”
The Mightyena only panted, his tongue hanging out between a gap in his teeth.
“Yeah, well. I suppose the chopstick walk wasn’t needed either. Now let’s go home. I’ll fix us up something to eat.”
Tyler opened the door to his car, letting Mightyena jump in first into the front seat before getting in himself, turning the key in the ignition, the purring of the engine a nice hum to his ears. Singing along with the song on the radio, Tyler began to pull back into traffic. He however didn’t notice the long dead and long flat Ekans that he carelessly ran over like the cars before him, leaving a print of his tire tracks into his body. As a matter of fact, that Ekans was hoping to seek shade underneath a black sweater a little girl accidently let go of when driving toward Slateport around noon, that black sweater now buried in a hole two feet deep, where it will be protected from the harmful UV rays. Except for noon that is; there's rarely any shade at that time.
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Yeah. That's happened to me. Except I didn't bury it. I thought a black sweater was a scottie dog.
Haha it wasn't!
LaTeR dAyZ!
Haha it wasn't!
LaTeR dAyZ!
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