~Inevitable~(one-shot)

[Chibi Pika]

Okay, you guys win, i'll revise Latias >> Looks like my plot of "showing not telling" didn't work. Regardless of whether "telling" what things look like is a crappy desciption method, it seems to get the point across better.

Okay, yeah, rant over XP

Hmm, I didn't reallly feel she was telling him what to do, I see it more as perhaps that she was offering suggestive insight. Lugia actually is older, Latios/Latias are the youngest in LC, but the ages never really come up, so it doesn't matter.

Heh, yes, I love his personality *huggles Lugia in chapter <insert big number here>* I can't wait until the first chapter in which he really gets developed.

Oh, and indigestable_wad: not fair, you predicted the theme of chapter <insert big number here> (the same one as above.)

~Chibi~;249;

 

[indigestible_wad]

Well I didn't mean to. You could have just let it be. I was reffering to the comment made to tell the humans not destroy themselves. Honestly, it wasn't my fault.

 

[Cs32]

Well, i'm finally here! I just read your pm and came here immeadiately. I loved the whole darkness thing of humans ending up killing each other, cause thats what the US had to do with what we had a view as terrorists. Though everyone has their own opinions about others, good or bad. I also saw that you used great vocabulary in this. I'm thinking that you used a thesaurous???
Later
~~CS~~

 

[lilbluecorsola]

Crud, I'm late. -.-

Gawd, Chibi, that was just pure awesomeness. =O A-ma-zing, is all I can say.

Didn't catch any mistakes either. o.o And of course, description was just magnicificent.

Although, when you started describing Lugia as a 'dragon', I kind of lost my visual image. I always pictured it as more of a bird.

Just another brilliant One-Shot Chibi. =O *Supa Lolly*

 

[Chibi Pika]

Oi, page 4, all cause I'm banned off of the comp. >> So you won't be seeing many reviews or any material from me for a while, unless I manage to get on during school. *Sigh* Ah, well...

I also saw that you used great vocabulary in this. I'm thinking that you used a thesaurous???

XP I over-abused it.
Alt

hough, when you started describing Lugia as a 'dragon', I kind of lost my visual image. I always pictured it as more of a bird.

Er, well, I just kinda seem him as being more draconic aside from the face. ^^

Thanks both of you, your words mean a lot!

~Chibi~;249;

 

[Burnt Flower]

Very nice one-shot, though I think I would've understand it better if I read the latest chapters of The Legendarian Chronicles (and while we're on the subject...Write another one-shot that isn't related with your story!!! )

I found one spelling error (on board-onboard) though the way it was spelled in the one-shot can also be correct. There was also a grammatical mistake that I'll show in the following example:

You forgot the last quotation mark:
“Humans did that. They are destroying themselves, and we do not have to prevent it.

And that's about it in the grammatical aspect.

I found the plot of this one-shot to be quite interesting, though the story: 'Almighty Pokemon God who hates humans because they're destroying the world' has been done before (though of course, this was done much better than most of those stories).

I liked Lugia in this (quite believable) and his narration, but my favorite line from this one-shot doesn't come from him:
“If we keep waging war upon the humans, then both they and we will fall in time. Why add to the inevitable suffering?”

I found that line to be quite profound, but the best thing about it is that one could analyze it.

Well, yeah, I had a random idea all of a sudden and just had to type it, but for LC readers, this explains why Lugia saved the Rebellion members and really has nothing whatsoever to do with the chosen eight, but Latias’s dialogue is perhaps the biggest plot hint of all time.

Ok, now I'm really lost in the storyline... ;_;

Good job!

 

[Chibi Pika]

Write another one-shot that isn't related with your story!!! )

Another? I've never even done one, but I know, I know, I'm trying ^^;;;;

I found the plot of this one-shot to be quite interesting, though the story: 'Almighty Pokemon God who hates humans because they're destroying the world' has been done before (though of course, this was done much better than most of those stories).

Heh, yeah, I know, I've seen it done before tons. Halfway through writing it, I realized that this could possibly even be accused of ripping off of Ho-oh's personality in lilbluecorsola's fics even *hides* I did get a lot of inspiration from her but...

Ok, now I'm really lost in the storyline... ;_;

XP In a nutshell, you read chapter five, right? Right, okay, remember when the storm ended and Rudy told Jade how it happened and gave a vague description of Lugia? Well, everyone's been getting in a bad habit of making assumptions with hardly any facts, so if you remember the reference Lugia made to the "Chosen Eight to ally with the Legendaries" in the Prologue, people assumed the reason Lugia saved the Rebellion members was because one of them was Chosen and it drove me crazy so I wrote this to prove them wrong. =P That made no sense whatsoever did it?

Beware, my next one-shot (assuming I don't manage the impossible and come up with an original idea for once) features characters from chapter nine. X3

~Chibi~;249;