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It all starts here

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Pokechuppa

'Bi-bi!'
I'm not sure why this image isnt coming up??? any ideas? It shows up on my Signiture


for some reason, mainly through boredom, i've decided to create somesort of theory about how pokemon were made.
i'm sure there are plenty of threads like my one, but i just thought i'd have a little go at my own theory.

I shall update this whenever i can and i hope you enjoy this fanfic and begin to ask questions. Please feel free to comment, whether its good or bad i'll hopefully reply.​

Character list with short bio:

Yit -
Deoxys Leader.
First appearence: Wish 1
Form: Normal
Bio: Yit was appointed to be the Leader of the Deoxys after the 4 Ability Deoxys had sacrifised themselves.

(All main characters will be put here once they have appeared in the fic.)

so lets begin...

Intro:

Since the dawn of earth, many creatures have roamed its grounds, interacting with one another. It was the year 6. The 6th day, on the 6th Month, in the Year 6 (-06/06/06-). On this special day, once every three years, a Gas is let off from another Planet, called Klinimachi. This gas is let off and travels to the Earth. At emense speeds it hits the earths grounds and pierces the skin of the planet till it reaches the core. The Core; lit up by a series of flames flickering between the rocks, is highly dangerous to anything that enters it. The cave being emensly high and quite wide is quite a challenge for an exit, no natural light enterd as the cave had neither an exit or an entrance. The floor of the cave was a random series of pools of Lava. Once the mysterious gas settles in the core, it thickens, until it becomes a sludge type liquid. the colour of this liquid is Pink.

Each time this Sludge is sent to the Earths core, its shape changes, until 57 years later, its shape had finally taken a human form. Still being Pink, this human sludge creeps around the grounds of the Earths core; unaware of where it is. Each step it takes, it gains experience and levels up. By leveling up, its appearence begins to mature.

it is the 17/11/78. 78 years since the Earth was made, Our Pink sludge has matured its body, colour and shape. through time our Gas has formed what we know today as Deoxys. Having the ability to make dark clones of itself, it does so. Since Deoxys has still got along time to fullygrow, our clones are mearly Gas form and have to go through the Sludge stage still. Deoxys waits. The only attack it knows is struggle. It continously uses this move to try and get out of the Earths core and experience the rest of the worlds areas. Unable to break through, Deoxys wears itself out; it faints and goes to sleep, till it's finally awoken by its clones.

it is now the year 205. And our deoxys has finally awoken from its sleep to regain its energy. It's clones have formed and through time have slightly changed their appearence. (-defence, speed, attack and Normal-). With its new clones (-which are still creating more gas clones-) it points out the strongest of each ability (-defence, speed, etc.-) and absorbs their strength to perform an ancient art called Gikochimii. this art is based on Sacrifise to perform 4 wishes. By sacrifising itself along with the strongest ability Deoxys, it gives the remaining Deoxys 4 wishes.

Their bodies all flare up and intertwine each other. As they burn the flames size increases till it is at a maximum size, and without a moment to spare, it dissapears and is gone. Confused as the Deoxys are, they knew that a sacrifise was needed and so they search to find a new Leader, by going through a series of tests.

Only one shall prevail. And that one was found very soon after the tests had begun.

After pointing out a new Deoxys Leader, they discuss what they should wish for.

After 4 weeks of discussing, the Deoxys Leader, i'll call him Yit, uses one of his wishes.

Wish 1:

Yit opens up his arms and begins to twirl upwards, realeasing a series of sparkling stars, that reflect the brightness of the flames. After moments of him spinning, his body began to change, He went through all his abilities till he stopped at defence. His time has come to reveal his first wish.

"I wish for an exit to this cave."

After moments of silence and suspence, a bright, golden beam of light enveloped Yit, Evil and Good surrounded him. Sparks of Power began leaping of Yits body and fused with some of the Gas clones. All the other Deoxys fell back as the power of this beam was to strong for their premature bodies to handle.

The beam continued to evelope Yit for many hours. Eventually, the power of the beam began to decrease, and the Deoxys were able to stand up to gaze apon the beam of heavan and hell.

Suddenly a heavy breeze entered the Cave and fused with the beam of light. The beam went clear; almost glass like. It solidified. Yit was solidified in a Glass beam, unable to move or anything. The Deoxys began to panic and rampaged inside the cave.

One Deoxys noticed a small opening at the top of the cave. (-Being Pre-mature, all the Deoxys in the cave were unable to fly.-) Fortunately, the Glass beam came down to the floor so the Deoxys were able to climp up it.

It was a long period of time before the first Deoxys reached the top of the cave. It was the first time a Pokemon had seen the Earths Nature.

The Deoxys softly said under its breath

"Thankyou Yit and thankyou Illii."

"WHO'S ILLII? WHAT DOES THE EARTH LOOK LIKE TO THIS NEW DEOXYS? WHENS THE NEXT CHAPTER COMING? :D"​

I'll post the next chapter once i have 8 replies to this.

please leave a comment

thanks

Pokechuppa ;026;
 
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Yami Ryu

Well-Known Member
...

Bumpings = against the rules. Unless it's a chapter.

D: no chapter = spaaam.

... so gas randomly SHOOTS OUT from RANDOM PLANET, strikes Earth in its budding days and ZOOM! Past rock and more rock and lava and rock to THE CORE OF THE EARTH! Which scientists think could pretty much be a ball of molten liquid, not a cave.

Already this sounds like a rip off of 'journey to the center of the earth' and 'Dragonriders of Pern'.

Not a good thing, really.

After 4 weeks of discussing, the Deoxys Leader, who is called Yit, uses one of his wishes.

Saying 'I'll call him Yit', is sorta breaking the fourth wall.

Overall, you don't really explain how the clones are really, alive, oh yes they formed after time from being Deoxys shadow clones, but how? I mean if they're shadow clones, ain't got much substance? And how was Deoxys able to survive anyways? And this is very, very throwing away the data known about Deoxys, I mean it comes from space, is DNA+virus, it gets power from a crystal, mean makes me like the anime movie/want to see it.

And if the 'Deoxys Leader' kills himself and his strongest Deoxys clone .... why does he do it? I mean... wishes? And not for himself? ... and if there's no way out then how did the Deoxys locate this person you dubbed Yit? Is Yit even a Deoxys?

Overall description is... tacky at best. And it's not very long, mean the INTRODUCTION is longer than the first chapter! I think you should put more effort into the story than making it look all oooh fance small text.

:/
 

Pokechuppa

'Bi-bi!'
Saying 'I'll call him Yit', is sorta breaking the fourth wall.
Okay, so the only reason i called him Yit was instead of saying ' then deoxys said to another deoxys who told his brother deoxys. i suppose the way i had written it might have totally put off the story, as its about the past and tehn i come in 'i'll call him yit'

Overall, you don't really explain how the clones are really, alive, oh yes they formed after time from being Deoxys shadow clones, but how?
It says in the intro: every 3 years, a burst of gas is let of from a planet. This gas is sent to the earth in a magma cavern. Through time this gas goes through the stages of gas - sludge - human shape - Deoxys. Then deoxys, having the ability to make clones, does so. but its not fully grown yet, so the clones are gas and have to go through the stages.

I mean if they're shadow clones, ain't got much substance?
I dont know what you mean 'aint got much substance'

And how was Deoxys able to survive anyways? And this is very, very throwing away the data known about Deoxys, I mean it comes from space, is DNA+virus, it gets power from a crystal, mean makes me like the anime movie/want to see it.
'it comes from space' well the planet where the gas comes from, happens to be in space :S 'DNA and virus' i.e. the gas!

And if the 'Deoxys Leader' kills himself and his strongest Deoxys clone .... why does he do it? I mean... wishes? And not for himself?
He wishes for freedom, for all. even if he cant be free.

... and if there's no way out then how did the Deoxys locate this person you dubbed Yit?
do u mean how did all the deoxys locate 'yit' because yit is in the same cave :/

Is yit even a deoxys
well he's not going to be anything else since its the year w/e before humans or anything.

oh yeah and the fancy font thing, i happen to like that font...

pokechuppa ;026;x
 

DarkPersian479

Well-Known Member
Despite your attempt at explaining this mess in the last post, I am still utterly confused. From what I understand, some planet farts and releases gas, that gas somehow penetrates the Earth's core and turn into Deoxys. Deoxys creates four clones of itself and they grant it a wish to escape the core.

Is that what's going on? Sorry to say this, but it still doesn't make a lot of sense, or draw my interest. On top of that it's rushed and way too short.
 

Pokechuppa

'Bi-bi!'
basically its a ("how can i put it") a plan to a future fan fic ("plan!") later on, it explains how deoxys created the world of pokemon etc.

but i know its rushed because its just a quick 'plan'

if you have any advice on how i could make it more 'detailed' then i'd like to know.

but thanks i may have not made it clear that this is a plan of a future fan fic. i'll do so.

sorry for the confusion

pokechuppa x ;026;

oh and also, wish 1 is not chapter 1, chapter 1 comes after it
 

Sybot

Well-Known Member
If its only a 'plan' and not the real fic then this should have been posted in the Authors Cafe. Ask a mod to move it there.
 

justice_pie

-swampert used gasp!
in the pokedex,it says deoxys was created by a laser beam hitting a spce-virus, which plummeted down to earth and became deoxys, just thought i'd point that out,and i thought that deoxys was just one pokemon, that can change shape.

and if its a plan shouln't it have been put in the aspiring authors section?
 
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Pokechuppa

'Bi-bi!'
yes i found that out after a few people had begun posting, i havent really ever used or even looked at the fan fic section, mostly based myself in the fan art section.

i know the facts about deoxys and therefore thats how people could critisize my fan fic for being incorrect, but i didnt write this fan fic 'plan' for facts i'd written it purely based on the fact that i was bored. so sure people could 'have a go at me' for my lack of detail, or lack of enthusiasm towards it, or even the research done to make sence with the conspiring games.

but this is written for fun not a serious story. how much time do you think i have?!

pokechuppa x
 
I dont have much time either ... I run the What happened to Ash's pokemon before he caught them thread... and its not very easy......
 

Pokechuppa

'Bi-bi!'
i know, its so hard, cause i love making pokemon sprites aswell, ive got a future comic coming out, i have 2 check this and i've got quite a few polls of mine i need to keep checking and sometimes updating and then theres the posts of other people that i like to look at when i new post has been made by them becuase i adore them... yeah.

POkechuppa x ;026;
 

Yami Ryu

Well-Known Member
... Gawd this is not a place to chat over how you use lame excuses of I don't have enough time to write. Well guess what, maybe if you used your mind, and only wrote a little at a time, and worked at it, and really tried to make it good, people would read your fic. But no, you have to use lame excuses to try and get off the hook.

Oh and you know something for a little slice of reality?

If all the Deoxys are at the center of the earth, and note you have yet to describe a Deoxys, or let anyone know Yit was a deoxys, seriously. That's just pathetic you want to continue to use excuses >> anyways, if all the darn deoxys are at the center of the earth which is under many, many miles of rock and lava and other layers of earth crusts, how can a beam of glass go slicing down, down down, to the center of the earth...
 

Pokechuppa

'Bi-bi!'
well, the beam is not made of glass when it hits the earths crust

After moments of silence and suspence, a bright, golden beam of light

But no, you have to use lame excuses to try and get off the hook
i dont have time since im out with them most of the time. and the fact this was only written out of boredom, i dont expect it 2 b great, i wasnt even expecting anyone to reply to it as i just posted it for no reason.

i like productive comments, not so much 'lets have a go' complaints
pokchuppa x
 
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CWisgood

Coral Eye Trainer
Don't have time? Save the file and write at some other time. Don't make an excuse to accuse someone of being friendless and having no life because they criticized you.

Nobody's making you do this GCSE level. :/ Just write it well enough.

And "I didn't expect replies"?

I'll post the next chapter once i have 8 replies to this.

please leave a comment

Why post this then?
 

Pokechuppa

'Bi-bi!'
thats wot im doing, ok im sorry for being so harsh but im just so busy with more important thing and i dont know why i had written that cause i was going to update whenever but i probz wont cause theres too much else for me 2 do

pokechuppa x
 

Yami Ryu

Well-Known Member
well, the beam is not made of glass when it hits the earths crust

Lol I love how you only respond to part of the comment. It still has to cut through MANY LAYERS OF CRUST AND LAVA. And crap. It'd have been more realistic if they'd just been.... teleported.

i dont have time since im out with them most of the time. and the fact this was only written out of boredom, i dont expect it 2 b great, i wasnt even expecting anyone to reply to it as i just posted it for no reason.

i like productive comments, not so much 'lets have a go' complaints

... lol if you don't want to get better. If you don't want to accept knowledge how to get better, if you don't wan't to be great- then why write when you're a 'bleep censor' spriter? Would you make up such lame excuses for crap sprites? Writing is no different. So how about you get off your high horse, or since you want to keep saying you don't have enough time, to even write a bit a day, and then lump it all together over many days, I'm just gonna save you a heap of trouble.

It's called, poking a mod and pointing to thread. And thread likely getting closed.
 
Then hold it off for a rainy day and quit acting all "oh poor me I have no time" while fobbing off any potential hiccups in plot with excuses and using this thread as a demi chat room.

I don't have time currently to write myself, big deal.

Sandra
 
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