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Johto's Gold (PG-13)

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Intelligence, Sep 7, 2009.

  1. Intelligence

    Intelligence Wild Young Hearts

    Hi! Welcome to my new fic, 'Johto's Gold'. It basically tells my own version of Pokemon Silver/Soul Silver, with various plot twists and just general changes here and there, but still completely my own. For example, Soul is included, by I think having someone travel along with the main character is too cliche, so I've made it so that she's already done her jounrey, and is now simply 'travelling' the Johto region, whilst appearing here and there when they are in the same places and helping out, like at the beginning, when Elm is taken to hospital, and near the end, when the Rocket's take Goldenrod City under a siege.

    Anyway, I'd jsut like to point out that the team of Pokemon that the main character has, I am hoping, will be my future team on Pokemon SoulSilver. Okay, Let's get on with chapter one!

    Chapter 1: Johto's Gold

    Gold hated being woken up from good dreams. Or, more specifically, woken up form good dreams by his alarm clock, which his mother had somehow rigged the volume level to near maximum, a trick he’d been unable to figure out, and thus had been unable to lower the volume. He groaned, and flung his arm out to stretch, and in doing so, knocked the said clock from his chapped, wooden bedside table.

    A brief flicker of satisfaction and smug victory wavered across his face, before it was snatched away by a call from his mother from downstairs.

    “Honey? I can hear that alarm clock, so I know you’re awake. Prof. Elm called earlier this morning. He wants you for... something or other. I can’t remember exactly. So hurry up and get down here! I’m making pancakes... I’m trying to make pancakes; you can have some when you come back.” He heard a clatter of pans, and was sure he could hear his mother curse to herself quietly; the floorboards were so thin, and his mother was so loud, it wasn’t that hard not to.

    He groaned, reluctantly dragging himself from his soft, fluffy bed. He rubbed the sleepiness from his eyes, scratched his stomach, and stretched, not knocking over any alarm clocks in the process. He drowsily made his way to the small, white-tiled en suite, to the right side of his bedroom, and... Did his business, brushed his teeth, the works.

    20 minutes later, his mother heard the dull footsteps that signalled his coming down the stairs.

    Meredith - Gold's mother - had a dark brown poodle-like perm, which seemed to bounce back into perfect place even after she'd gotten out of bed. She had her favourite red-hooped earrings on, which swayed gently when she walked. They had been her mothers before she had died, so she made an effort to wear them as often as she could.

    She had on a light pink blouse, which was, as ever, crease-free, some black jeans, and her favourite tennis shoes. By some, she'd been called beautiful. By others, eccentric. But Gold never mentioned it, because Meredith always went into a mood when people commented negatively about how she looked. Gold always thought it must have been a 'girl' thing.

    She scowled as he hopped down the last steps, dressed in his casual clothes. Black cap, with a wide yellow stripe at the back – although, since it was turned around, the stripe was at the front, with the strap – and a spike of his unruly lack hair that fanned out from underneath the cap’s rim. He had a red hoodie jacket with a black rimmed collar, with a soft, white inside, and black shorts that went down to his knees. He had red and white shoes, with three Velcro straps and, strangely, no socks.

    His mother, Meredith, handed him a plate with two slightly burnt pancakes, with an extra dollop of ‘Mr. Honeez’s Imported Combeez' Syrup’ to hide the taste; however, it wasn’t something Gold ever particularly noticed. He and his mother were so close, he’d gotten quite fond of her unusual cooking methods. They both ate it with gusto, savouring its sweet, sticky taste.

    Gold dabbed at a runaway fleck of syrup on the side of his cheek, and licked it from his finger. His mother laughed, before clearing away the plates from the table. Gold stood up, brushing off his sleeves and licking his fingers clean.

    “I suppose I’d better get going. I’ve kept the Professor waiting for almost an hour already.” He smiled, and headed for the door.

    “Oh!” his mother exclaimed, rushing to get something from the cupboard. Gold paused at the door, and turned to see his mother rushing towards him with a dark blue device. “Here, honey, your PokéGear came back from the repair shop! Don’t sit on it this time!” she said, hurriedly trying to get in on his wrist. Gold protested, and did it himself.

    "Mum, for god's sake, it's not my first day of school!" he exclaimed, to which she just giggled.

    "I know, I know. Sorry dear. Now, you'd better hurry. It's been almost an hour since the man called." She sent him of with a brief hug, before closing the door behind him.

    New Bark Town was a small, but refreshing village. Gold’s house was one of the smaller houses, but wasn’t attached to a string of other houses like lots of his other friends’ were, which counted for something. A row of tall, flourishing green trees ran along the side of the road, and they each whizzed past at a seemingly breakneck pace, as he sprinted towards New Bark Town Laboratory, owned by a mister Steven Elm.

    It was a large, dome-topped building. The glass dome on the top was held up by a symmetrical maze of white metal bars, which caught the sunlight and reflected it to various places around the town. It had a square annexe off the left side, with a balcony that ran all the way around, with around 5 accessible doors that each led to bedrooms, living rooms and such. Gold guessed that this was where he and his family stayed, as he’d never actually seen him go inside, nor had he ever been inside himself.

    “Ah, Gold. Not too late, not too late, I see. Come in, come in. I have something for you.” Elm was a young man, with brown, spiky hair, a blue shirt, brown trousers, and a long, white lab coat. Elm led Gold to a large room with many intricate and complicated looking machines lining the walls, which were a light green, as opposed to the blue tiled floor. Near one of the largest machines in the room, with a cylindrical device, with a glass case inside, with three Poke Balls placed in a triangular pattern.

    “Gold,” Elm explained, “inside this capsule are three Pokémon. Each on of them is extremely rare, and native to Johto. I’d like you to take one.” He pushed a round, yellow button on the control panel of the machine, and a blue screen flickered into life. It was a grey-brown background, with a spinning white platform in the centre of the screen. “You see,” he continued, “I need you to run an errand. Just past the next town, Cherrygrove City, there is a house belonging to an acquaintance of mine, Mr. Pokémon.”

    He led Gold over to digital map on a screen, which was mounted on the wall. He repeatedly touched an area, which magnified with each prod, until it came to a grassy clearing, and a house, surrounded by trees.

    “I’ve received word from him, that he’s discovered an important... well, discovery. I’d like you to—“

    “—to go and see what he’s found, yeah.” Gold finished for him. “And you want me to take a Pokémon with me, to keep me safe, right?” Elm nodded, smiling.

    “Correct. Now, if you could make you choice and be off as soon as possible, I’m sure Mr. Pokémon is waiting. He says it’s a very important discovery—“

    “I know, you said.” Gold walked over to the device, and looked over the choices.

    The first was Chikorita, a small, creamy-beige coloured Grass type Pokémon with a leaf on its head, small bud around its neck, and bright, gleaming red eyes. He pushed a button, which spun the platform, until another Pokémon’s data came up on the screen.

    ‘Cyndaquil’, a Fire type Pokémon. It was small, with a creamy-white underbelly, small paws, blue fur on its back, and four red spots which, apparently, spouted fire. It said on the screen that the amount of fire and the way it flickered reflected Cyndaquil’s emotions and feelings at the time.

    The next Pokémon, Gold took an instant liking to. It looked like a small blue crocodile, with a yellow belly, sharp teeth, red spikes down its back, and lively, energetic blue eyes. Simply looking at it filled him with a warm, anticipated feeling. Totodile, the Big Jaw Pokémon. He read the data, eagerly. Its jaws may be small, but they have the capacity to crush almost anything. Even its Trainer must be wary. Gold smiled, and knew he’d found the Pokémon he’d be taking.

    “I’ll have Totodile, please.” Elm nodded his approval, and typed something into a keyboard next to the machine one the wall. The Poke Ball with Totodile disappeared disappeared down a hole, and came rolling out of a hole near the bottom of the machine, into a small metal container, from which he picked it up.

    “Where do I put it?” He was at a loss of any pockets big enough to to put it in, and he didn’t have his bag with him. Elm looked up from a device he was fiddling with.

    “Just let it follow you around for now. I’ll give you a belt when you come back.” He said, and continued with his... fiddling.

    The exit from New Bark Town was a long, winding path, surrounded by trees from all sides, until it came to a grassy clearing. Totodile hopped happily along, snapping his jaws. He seemed happy already, which made Gold smile.
    Now that Gold had a Pokémon, he wasn’t quite sure what he wanted to do with his life.

    He’d thought about becoming a Pokémon Trainer, like everyone else, but that seemed a bit common. He thought becoming a Coordinator wasn’t quite his thing, but then that left... what? He looked down at Totodile, and wondered what kind of adventures they could have. Perhaps he could become some sort of archaeologist, or scientist. He’d often thought about wandering the Earth, searching for new species of Pokémon, but that seemed more daunting than going on his own Pokémon journey.

    He was snapped from his trance when he felt a tug on his trousers. He looked down, to see Totodile pointing at something. Upon looking, Gold saw the path come to an end in the near distance, which he guessed led to Cherrygrove City. He began running for it, Totodile happily keeping up.

    Cherrygrove city was larger than New Bark Town, understandably, and it was the first time he’d been there. The first thing he saw was a large, cylinder-shaped building, with a domed, red top, and a poke ball sign on the roof. He guessed that was the Pokémon Centre.

    Next to that was a long building, with a blue roof. There were many glass windows along its front, through which he could see it was the PokeMart. There were two streets of houses, behind which were more streets, lanes, and avenues, filled with whatever restaurants and cinemas and other shops their might be.

    “Right, so, I need to go somewhere around here...” Gold flicked on his PokéGear, and checked the Map application. According to it, he needed to go to the top left area of the city. Flicking off the map from his PokéGear, he set off at a run, Totodile in tow.

    It was a good hour and a half before he reached Mr. Pokémon’s house. It was a small bungalow, in an empty field, that was surrounded by trees. Gold wondered up to it, and knocked on the door. A man in his thirties answered. He was tall, had combed brown hair, and wore a dark blue suit, with a white shirt and a red tie, and polished black shoes. He had clear, round spectacles resting on the end of an almost perfect nose. An average Joe, as Gold would usually say.

    “Yes, young man?” he asked, showing lovely white teeth.

    “Um, I’m Gold, Professor Elm sent me?” said Gold. A look of realisation passed his face, before inviting him in.

    Gold sat down on a comfortable couch, and declined the offer of a drink; he was eager to get out of this house as soon as possible. There was something strange about it, and it felt... not right. Hostile, even.

    “He said you’d made an important discovery?” Gold asked. The man’s face brightened, and he went to his desk. From out of it, he took... an egg. It was smoothly round, cream in colour, with various red and blue triangle patterns and spots.

    “Is that... an egg?” Gold asked, still staring at it. Mr. Pokémon nodded, as he sat opposite him once more.

    “I think it may be a new species,” he said, looking more closely at it. “I’ve never seen any other egg that looks like it. Although, it does bear resemblance to Togekiss, which is native to the Sinnoh region.

    Gold had heard of Sinnoh before. His mum had told him stories of the water-rich Sinnoh, where the supposed representatives of time, space, and anti-matter took rest. He’d also heard one wild rumour that to God of all Pokémon resided in Sinnoh, but he wasn’t going to get his hopes up.

    At that moment, the door opened, and an elderly man came in. He had brown, spiked hair, although it was much older, not like Elm’s. He, too, wore a long, white lab coat, but had a beige jumper on, a blue collar, average dark-brown trousers, and worn, black shoes. He looked like Professor Oak, whom Gold had seen on TV.

    Sorry, I’ll have to be quick. Dragonite’s outside, I need to get back to Kanto very quickly. I have the data you wanted. Mewtwo is a very rare Pokémon indeed.” The man said. He then noticed Gold, and his face lit up at the sight of Totodile. He pointed at Gold, and said “Pokémon Trainer?”

    Gold hesitated, before shrugging. “I’m still not sure.” Oak laughed, and placed the black disc he appeared to have been holding in a drawer in Mr. Pokémon’s desk, where he slammed it shut a little too hard for it not to look suspicious.

    “Never mind, my boy. You’re at the age, now, where you’re not quite sure what you want to do with your life. I know it happened to me when I was younger. Err, Mr. Pokémon, could I have a drink?” he asked, to which Mr. Pokémon smiled, and scurried off into an unseen kitchen through a door Gold hadn’t seen beside the desk.

    The moment he was gone, Oak slumped back into the chair next to Gold, and leaned over to whisper.

    “Jeez, I can’t wait to get home. I have to wear these darn clothes every time I come over here, they’re too tight. He sure is a strange man, isn’t he?” he gave a hearty chuckle, and Gold decided that he liked Oak more than Mr. Pokémon. He seemed to have more to him. Despite his age, there was a look of exuberant, lively youth in his eyes, as well as that of age-old knowledge.

    Gold smirked, but hid it quickly as Mr. Pokémon came back in, and decided he’d better be getting back, now that he’d gotten what he’d come for.

    He stood up, and announced that he’d have to go. Oak stood up almost immediately after he’d said it, draining his drink in one gulp, and announced that he’d better be getting off too. Mr. Pokémon’s face dropped, and Gold suddenly felt a pang of pity for him.

    But he was just as determined to get away from the strange man. As he stepped outside, Oak turned to Gold and took something out of his pocket. It was a smooth, slender red device that looked like it swung open somehow. He could see a flat, blue light on the edge, which made Gold realize it was a PokeDex.

    “Listen to me, Gold,” he said. Gold was confused, but let the professor continue. “When I saw you and your Totodile together, I just knew you were going to do great things. It’s clear with its posture and attitude that it already likes you, yet its actions and features imply it has impressive, perhaps even exceptional battle skills.” Gold was quite lost, and still confused, but kind of got the idea. “So,” Oak continued, “here’s what I want you to do...”

    PokeDex stowed away in his pocket, Gold had decided how he wanted to travel the region of Johto; he considered it partly his very own adventure, collecting Gym Badges and training Pokémon, and partly a really long errand for Professor Oak, to travel and get the data for every Pokémon in the region on his PokeDex, for Oak to study. He was also quite tired, after carrying the small but surprisingly heavy ‘Pokémon’ egg from Mr. Pokémon’s house.

    He was nearing the exit route of Cherrygrove city, when someone jumped out from the bushes. It was a girl, a rather good-looking girl, was Gold’s initial thought. She pounced onto the road and pointed an accusing finger at him, as if she were some world-renowned detective, having just caught an elusive criminal. Gold was startled and rather taken aback, by her unexpected and uncanny appearance.

    “A-ha! Caught you!” she exclaimed, looking proud of herself. Gold sweat dropped, before asking who she was, and what exactly she thought she’d found in him.

    She giggled, before replying. “I’m Soul. Nice to meet you. Now, I’m afraid you’re going to have to come with me.” She tried to grab his arm, but he pulled it back.

    “What!? Who are you, some policewoman?!” he exclaimed, and she sighed, and made another grab for his arm.

    “Hey! Come with me! And you’ll need to return that Totodile to Professor Elm, thief!” she said, and made another grab for his arm, which he effortlessly swatted away.

    He got a proper look at her, and saw she looked like some kind of farmer. She was wearing a red top, whose sleeves’ stopped about two inches before it reached the wrists. She was wearing a pair of blue dungarees, red shoes, and really long white socks, that came up well past her knees, and ended in a large, wide black stipe. She was wearing a big, bouffant looking white hat, tied up with a red ribbon, and had a large, heavy looking yellow bag strapped over her shoulder, which she now put on the floor.

    For the first time, he noticed that a Quilava sat at her feet, silently waiting for an instruction.

    “What!?” Gold exclaimed. “Thief?!” Soul realised he was truthful, and did indeed, not know what she was talking about.

    “Yes! Someone broke into the laboratory and stole a Pokémon! I assumed it was you, since there was no Totodile. But, then again, there was no Chikorita either. But, the Professor...” she trailed off, her face awash with worry.

    “What? What’s wrong with him?” Gold asked, somewhat worried. Soul bit her lower lip.

    “Well, the thief detonated a bomb when he broke in... the Professor is being taken to hospital! And... The doctor said it’s not looking good...”
    Last edited: Sep 13, 2009
  2. Janovy

    Janovy Banned

    OK, I am not much of a reviewer but I will express my thoughts. I was thinking already someone would have come up with the fan aficionado promoting HG/SS but I thought of it somewhat different :)

    But I have one question though, how come Soul has Cyndaquil even though she has already traveled the Johto. Does she like it the way it is or what?

    Everything else was pretty good, the description was nice and I like the use of the bomb. Can't wait to see what happened to Elm?
  3. Intelligence

    Intelligence Wild Young Hearts

    She has a Quilava, and yes, you're bang on, she prefers it that way. You see what happened to professor Elm in chapter 2, and you also learn a bit more about Soul and Gold's past, as well as part 1 of the first gym challenge. Chapter 2 will be longer than the first one by, let's say, 463 words?
  4. Intelligence

    Intelligence Wild Young Hearts

    Chapter Two: Red-Haired Boy

    A look of alarm spread across Gold’s face, and he set off at a sprint towards New Bark Town, Soul on his tail, Quilava and Totodile behind them both.

    Almost out of breath, Gold ran into the town to see an ambulance being loaded with a stretcher, lying on which, was Professor Elm. His face was badly burned, the skin charred, red and blotchy in places. His hand was hanging limp off the stretcher, and Gold could see it was much worse than his face; blackened, peeling and bloody. Perhaps he was covering his face with his hands, which meant they got the worst of it.

    Gold brought a hand to his forehead, unable to believe that all this had happened while he was gone. The normal, lively Professor Elm, now blackened and burned on a stretcher, driven into hospital... it didn’t seem right. He was one of those people who seemed like they’d never actually be in any bad situation, who always had everything sorted, but in a funny, clumsy way. A happy, kind and considerate person like him didn’t deserve this. Gold felt a surge of anger towards whatever pathetic excuse of a person could do a thing like this to such a nice person.

    Soul caught on to his sadness, and clamped an assuring hand on his shoulder.

    “I knew him, too. He gave me my Cyndaquil, last year, when I started my journey. He was so...” she trailed off, again, and Gold knew that she was feeling the same as he was. Both of them stood and watched, helpless, as the ambulance drove off down towards the small, tacky town hospital.

    Gold’s mother stepped up beside him, a worried and slightly upset look on her face. After 16 years of knowing his mother, Gold knew that she was feeling much more upset and worried than what her face said she did, but she did a good job of keeping herself composed, and not breaking down like she did when the news had come that Gold’s father had died in an explosion at the factory he had worked in.

    Gold still had a photo of him, his mum, and his dad, from about 5 years ago, the year he died. Gold sometimes lay awake at night, often crying lightly, upset that he’d never be able to spend any quality time with his dad, all those conversations he’d never take part in. All those chats about Pokémon, football, life and girls that all his other ‘guy’ friends chatted about with their dads. No. He didn’t get any of it, because some jerk at the factory was too lazy to check whether the pressure gauge hadn’t ‘filled up’ yet.

    With the sudden memories of his father, and the current situation with Elm suddenly crashing into him with the force of a TGV, Gold felt an unexpected urge to curl up and have a good old cry. He turned and walked away, silent tears streaming down his face, but wiped them away with his sleeve before anyone saw them.

    His mother sighed and came up to him, wrapping a reassuring arm around his shoulder.

    “Hey... that’s enough of those silly tears,” his mother said with a slight chuckle, and rubbed his back with her soft, warm hands. “You know Professor Elm... he’ll be okay. And... Well, it’s not as if an explosion as small as that could kill anyone, I mean, his hands got the worst of it...” Gold gave her a ‘look’. She smiled. “Sorry, that’s not really helping, is it?” Gold laughed, quietly, and his mother joined in. Gold nodded, and wiped his eyes.

    “Can we go visit him?” Gold asked. His mother nodded, and asked if his ‘friend’ wanted to come too. She turned to Gold’s ‘friend’, only to find she already knew her.

    “Soul? Soul, is that you!” she exclaimed, and Soul smiled, relieved that Gold’s mum had finally recognised that they knew one another.

    “Yes, hi Meredith!” she said, happily, and they exchanged a brief, friendly hug.

    “God, it’s been years! How’s things been? I watched you on the television last year! You were wonderful!” Gold’s mum asked, all the while Gold looked on, bewildered, and completely confused.

    “Wait, hold on, you two know each other!?” he asked, pointing an accusing finger at the two females. Meredith nodded, and explained that she and Soul’s mother had been best friends in their youth, and that she still sometimes visited, although it had been years since she’d actually been with Soul, the last time being 12 years ago, when she was 5 and Gold was 4. This time, it was Soul’s turn to be awestruck with a sudden epiphany, as while she remembered Meredith, she had all but totally forgotten that Gold was one of her childhood friends until they had moved to Olivine city, whilst Gold’s family remained in New Bark Town.

    Meredith smiled, and decided to embarrass them both. “Oh, you two were inseparable, once upon a time.” She added the latter expression to make it seem like some romantic fairy tale. “Georgina and I made a bet on who would ask who to go out with them first when they were older. Of course, I was completely sure Gold would have mustered up the courage and asked by now, but then came the move...” she said, and whilst Soul and Gold blushed madly and avoided each other’s eye, she remembered that the small lake between New Bark Town and Kanto was were Soul’s father, who was a sailor, had worked, before he had been promoted to a captain, but had unfortunately had to move to Olivine city, where he sailed Johto and Kanto’s finest cruise liner, the SS ANNE.

    Professor Elm was lying in a bed in ward 26. He had a bandage around his forehead, where he had been knocked unconscious by debris sent flying from the explosion. His hands were covered in bandages, and they couldn’t even leave him alone with his friends, having to leave a nurse at the ready, because he was in a state where he could need attention at any time.

    He’d been unconscious when they’d arrived and, now, just under an hour later, he was still in the same state. In fact, he’d barely moved more than twice in the time they’d been there. For some reason, Gold’s mum sat, stroking his hand, but it was hard to tell, by the expression on her face, whether she realised she was doing it. Soul sat, a grim look on her face, which showed she wasn’t sure what she felt for him. She was upset, obviously, but she didn’t see any signs that he was going to die, taking in that he’d barely moved within the last hour, and there was a nurse on hand who could help, and who would immediately call the doctor’s should the need arise, which meant she was sure he would be okay, which made her worry less about him, which made her sad that she wasn’t worrying that much about him.

    She’d been visiting when the explosion had taken place. Just outside of the laboratory, in fact, and Elm had seemed reasonably okay when he’d told her to go and find the boy who had just run out of the window with a Poke Ball in his hand, which meant that either he was in a worse condition that she remembered, and she had not seen the injuries that had taken place. Then again, it was full of smoke, and he had somewhat covered his hands. She remembered a few burns on his face, but they must have developed and worsened while she... while she wasn’t there.

    “Well...” Meredith started, giving his hand one final clasp, before standing up, and placing a bouquet of flowers she’d bought from the shop (so tacky) on the way into a clean, shiny glass vase that was on the bedside table. “I think we should leave him now. He’s under good care,” she said, smiling warmly at the nurse, who returned the smile, a began to draw the curtains round at the sign that his visitors were leaving, so she could attend to him in privacy.

    Gold wanted to stay until Professor Elm was recovered, but his mother wasn’t having it

    “No, now you listen here, Gold.” She was determined to get him off on his own adventure. “The Professor will be fine, and you need to get to Cherrygrove city and sign up before it closes. Didn’t you know that today is the last day?”

    Gold looked alarmed, and looked hurriedly at his PokéGear, finding that there was only ten minutes before the Pokémon Centre in Cherrygrove city stopped taking in registrations for this year’s Pokémon League Tournament.

    “Oh, no! I’ll never be able to sign up in time!” he exclaimed, and mentally kicked himself.

    “Well,” Soul said, “I could always take you on my Pidgeot?”

    Pidgeot landed, lightly and gracefully, in front of the Pokémon Centre, and Gold jumped off the moment that it touched the ground. He ran into the Centre, and came up to the desk, where Nurse Joy smiled happily.

    “Is it too late to sign up for the Pokémon League?” He asked, desperately. Joy smiled it his hopefulness, and nodded, smiling, again.

    “Of course not! Now, you need to sign this...”

    Gold came out holding a shiny new Badge Case. It was green, with a sleek, midnight blue stripe diagonal across the middle, with a Poke Ball in the middle. Inside was a soft, smooth velvet cushion-like fabric that kept the Badges smooth, and without scratches. There were eight holes in all, each on shaped to fit each of Johto’s official Pokémon League Badges. He grinned at it, as if it were a new toy he’d gotten for Christmas, and stowed it away in a pocket in his backpack, which his mother had generously packed for him. The egg was also in there, which his mother had kept since he’d ran back home when Professor Elm was being carried on a stretcher.

    By now it was night, and Gold was unsure of where to go. Soul had come into the Pokémon Centre when he was signing the forms, and filling Nurse Joy in with details about his age, height, et cetera, to say that she was going, and when he came out with his Badge Case, she had already long since flown off on her Pidgeot.

    He had no where to stay, and suddenly had an idea. “Hey...” he said, as he turned and walked back into the Pokémon Centre, which was just closing up.

    The next morning, Gold was determined to get a start on his journey as soon as possible. His mother had bought him some supplies with her own money for the first time, but warned him that when he got prize money from other trainers, he’d have to buy it himself. But he could always send a small portion home to her, in case he ever ran out, and then he could come home and get some.

    Enormously exited, Totodile mimicking his emotions, Gold set off at a jog for the route 30, Totodile happily hopping along behind.

    In the grassy area, where the path split up into two, one that led to Mr. Pokémon’s house – which he carefully avoided - , the other leading to a different route which, according to his PokéGear, led to Violet City, the home of Gym #1. Taking off excitedly down that route, he almost tripped over a small, hunched over shape on the ground. He skidded to a halt, balancing on one of his feet.

    The small shape looked up, and angrily pounced to its feet, revealing itself to be a person. Or, more accurately, a very angry person, who was flailing something about not being noticed because he was too small. Gold sweat dropped.

    The boy had spiky, red hair, a dark purple jacket with a red zip, dark grey trousers, and burgundy shoes. He wore an arrogant, cocky smirk, with piercing silver coloured eyes.

    “Well... what were you doing on the ground, then?” Gold asked. The young boy pouted, and explained that it was none of his business. Then he got more on the defensive, and challenged him to a battle, as ‘penance for his sin’. Gold happily accepted all hyped that it would be his first battle.

    The boy grabbed a Poke Ball from a belt concealed under his jacket, and threw it into the air. Out of it, in a harsh, white light, burst the Grass type Pokémon from Elm’s lab, Chikorita.

    “Go, Chikorita!” he yelled, and Chikorita glared at Gold’s Totodile. Totodile dashed out from behind Gold’s legs, and glared right back, before flicking Chikorita on its nose. The red haired boy exclaimed that it wasn’t fair, but Gold merely suppressed a smirk.

    “Okay, let’s do more than just flick! Use Scratch!” Gold pointed a finger at Chikorita, as if directing his Pokémon to its target. Totodile bounded over in one leap, and began wildly swiping at Chikorita with it’s small, but sharp claws. Chikorita looked startled, its eyes clenched, and began to back away, but Totodile advanced. Chikorita then retaliated, by swiping Totodile away with it’s leaf, and while the small croc was distracted, jumped out of the way.

    The red-haired boy smirked, before ordering a Razor Leaf attack. Totodile knocked them away with a Water Gun, but some of them kept coming and hit him in the face. Totodile shook the pain from his head and, under instruction from Gold, blasted a Water Gun at Chikorita, which hit it square in the face. It tumbled, and was slammed against a tree when the blasts kept coming.

    When Chikorita stood up again, it waited for an order, but it didn’t come. It looked at its trainer, and saw that his hair was covering his eyes, and he withdrew his Chikorita, and smirked smugly.

    “Your Totodile’s weak,” he said. Gold’s jaw dropped.

    “What? He was just about to beat your Chikorita, but suddenly, he’s the weak one?!” Gold exclaimed, unable to believe the red haired boy’s cockiness. He just smirked, amused.

    “I don’t have time for a time-waster like you. You and your Pokémon alike are still both babies. I need a real challenge.” And with that, he walked off. Gold was fuming. He absolutely despised people like him, who thought they were above everyone else. He just sighed, and suppressed his anger.

    Totodile looked sad, under the impression that he’d lost the battle. It moaned, and looked up at Gold, sadly. Gold smiled and bent down, patting it’s head.

    “Don’t worry, you did great. You almost beat him, but he was stupid, and walked away.” Gold said, and smiled, which made Totodile smile back, his self-confidence coming back.

    As they walked on, Gold wondered who that boy was. He hadn’t even gotten his name. He sure was strange, though. He had strange eyes, as well.

    It was around an hour later, and Gold had just come to the end of a long, winding grassy route. The grass was long, the day was hot, and Gold was tired. He’d taken his hat off, and asked Totodile to wet it with water gun, so it looked wet and occasionally dripped water from it. He’d shaken it like a dog when Totodile had squirted it, but it was still quite wet, so Gold decided not to put his hat on just yet.

    He came around a corner, and in front of him was the entrance to a large cave. Gold decided it best to keep going, and explore it later when he was more experienced. He kept going, and saw a building some way in the near distance. There was a large, blue sign on its roof, that said: ‘Violet City: This Way’, with an arrow pointing downwards towards the doors. Gold grinned, and ran for it.

    Violet city was just as Gold had seen it on TV. The Pokémon Centre was the first thing he saw, and behind that was the Pokémon Trainer’s School, which was a long, grey building with a brown, slated roof. The most striking feature in the city was the very tall Sprout Tower, which was guarded by two large stone statues of Bellsprout; the very Pokémon the tower was dedicated to.

    Then, at last, there was the Gym. It was domed, a sky blue in colour. Gold imagined, knowing that it was a Flying type Gym, that the top of the large building probably opened up to allow the bird types to fly in the sky, but if it did, it wasn’t open now.

    Gold felt something rattle inside his bag, and he had a sudden urge to throw it on the ground, but then he thought of the egg inside. He gasped, and quickly took his bag from his shoulder and gently lowered it onto the ground, before sifting through it and taking out the egg. It was rocking, seemingly on its own, and Gold knew that it was close to hatching.

    He stifled a giggle, because he thought it would make him look childish, but really he was excited about the egg hatching. If it came out a really tough Pokémon, then it could travel with him, and become part of his team. Once it hatched, Gold made a silent vow to go and see Professor Elm in the hospital and show him the Pokémon.

    For now, though, the Pokémon Gym was his next destination. He strolled up to it, and pushed open the orange coloured double doors. Inside, he saw quite an amazing sight. He was standing on a platform, attached to a wall, and it was just that – a platform. Underneath was what looked like a very far drop. He gulped, and took a step backwards from the edge. He looked up, and saw more platforms floating in the air, with many tiny propellers on the underside, accompanied by one giant propeller.

    There was one large platform in the middle, with two smaller ones at each end. Gold guessed that that was probably the battleground.

    “Hello?” He shouted into the gym, and it was a while before he got an answer. Some guy with blue hair, stuck up in some really weird hair style, wearing blue shorts and a white t-shirt, peered over the edge.

    “Hi! Come on up! Just jump from that platform onto the beams on the wall, shimmy your way up, and then jump backwards, and you’ll land on your platform.” He said, simply. Gold’s jaw dropped, and at the sight, the Gym Leader just laughed. “Nah, jus’ kidding. Press that button on the side of the wall, and the platform you’re stood on will lift you up.” He then went back out of view, leaving Gold to push the button.

    As the platform sped towards the floating battleground, Gold sighed, glad that he’d just rid himself of a brief ‘Lara Croft’ escapade. Finally, the platform arrived, and he stepped onto his own platform at the end of the field, seeing the Gym Leader, Falkner, at the other end.

    As the entrance platform sped back down, Falkner introduced himself as Gym Leader, while Gold told him his name.

    “Well, let’s get the battle started, shall we? Go, Pidgeotto!” he said, It had light brown feathers, and creamy beige feathers on its belly, and on the tips of its wings. It had pink feathers jutting out from the crown of its head, with some yellow ones thrown in there as well. Gold guessed that it was the pre-evolved form of Pidgeot, partly because it was smaller, and partly because he knew it wasn’t the baby form, knowing that that was in fact, a Pidgey.

    “Okay, let’s go, Totodile!” he said, and Totodile punched the air with its tiny fists, and bounced up and down on the battle ground, as it jumped across the small gap.

    “Okay, use Gust!” Falkner shouted, and Pidgeotto began to flap its wings, hard, so that a torrent of air began speeding its way towards Totodile, who managed to stand his ground, but was pushed slightly towards the edge of the platform.

    “Totodile, use Water Gun!” A blast of water powered out of Totodile’s open jaw, and crashed into Pidgeotto, who flapped to keep balance, its feathers ruffled and disorderly. It cawed, and eyed Totodile, evilly, but shook its feathers back into place.

    “Use Peck!” Falkner shouted. Pidgeotto’s sharp beak glowed white, and it began flying at a great speed towards Totodile, who jumped out of the way, and onto Pidgeotto’s back. Pidgeotto began flying around, crazily, trying to shrug Totodile off, but the small blue croc just held on, refusing to let go.

    “Use Water Gun on its head!” Gold instructed. Totodile blasted a powerful jet on the crown of Pidgeotto’s head, and the bird was sent crashing towards the ground. But it rammed into the edge of the floating platform, and Gold gasped as an injured Pidgeotto and Totodile flew from the edge, and tumbled down into the darkness...
    Last edited: Sep 9, 2009
  5. Janovy

    Janovy Banned

    Hi :p

    Sorry for answering so late, but I was very busy with all this stuff around HGSS, man are the games cool :)

    Anyway, I liked the chapter, especially the part when they teased Soul And Gold about being a couple, lol. I hope for some more shipping in the following chapters and great battle.

    When talking about them, you could have used a bit of more description so it would look more realistic. Other than that, good job. I wonder who is going to win ;)
  6. Intelligence

    Intelligence Wild Young Hearts

    Thank you very much! Could you tell me a bit more specifically about which bit needed more description? I'm not sure which part you meant. Anyways, glad you enjoyed it, and please keep reading!
  7. sweet_piplup123

    sweet_piplup123 I lost the game?!?!

    I just started reading this, and I'll review the first chapter. I'll read the rest later :)

    Okay, firstly, I know you need to be descriptive, but:

    You could spread out this description a bit more, rather than describling the mother all in one go. Like perhaps describe her hair in one part and maybe describe her clothes whilst she's setting up the table for breakfast...you get what I mean? :)

    Now this sounds bland, doesn't it? You could try:
    Overall, you have good description, but try not to describe everything at once, and have more interactions between the charqacters, as this brings out the personalities of the characters.

    I hope I was helpful :)
    sweet_piplup123 ;393;
  8. Intelligence

    Intelligence Wild Young Hearts

    Yes, thanks, it was! I'll go and edit it now. Hope you keep reading! ^^
  9. Deadly.Braviary

    Deadly.Braviary Well-Known Member

    Not bad. I'd like to see the rest of it.
  10. lugia*master

    lugia*master Cheese XD

    Loved it! Any good story about Johto, and I'm in there. Way to go, Intelligence.
  11. sweet_piplup123

    sweet_piplup123 I lost the game?!?!

    Okay, let's get onto reviewing chapter 2.

    Firstly, numbers such as one and two should be written in words, so get into the habit of writing them. I got this advice off the other writers :)

    As I was saying before, the description is accurate, but give them some interaction, something like, I dunno:
    and etcetra.

    This concludes my review, keep it up :)
    sweet_piplup123 ;393;
  12. Intelligence

    Intelligence Wild Young Hearts

    Thanks alot! ^^ I'll do my best to remember and act upon the advice in the future!

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