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Joltorb rises!!

What should happen to J?(Whatever is voted will MAYBE happen!)

  • Total voters
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< My first Shiny!!!!
Joltorb rises!! Most likely PG for sad thoughts :(

Table of contents


Chapter 1.1 – fog (PG)
Chapter 1.2 - The Islands(PG)
Chapter 1.3 – Redson City Nears(PG)

Chapter 2.1- A small tower.(PG?)

Chapter 2.2- Fishing rally(PG)

Chapter 3.1- Scott and Ole’s shack(PG)

Chapter 3.2- Joltorb Rises(PG)

Chapter 3.3- A Never-ending battle(PG-13 to R)-Gore! YAY!

Chapter 4.1- the atom ball(PG)

Chapter 4.2- last battle(PG)

Chapter 4.3- end(PG)

The high street of Vermilion whistled with excitement over recent events. The shop windows were full of TVs telling rumors of Jerpho's "Poke'mon Problem" and all newsstands were sold out of their latest edition of "The Kanto Kweary!"(Yes it is a typo!)
One person affected greatly by this was Johto's respected Professor J. Of course you would too if you had to go to the "Haunted Island!"
As J ran down the street to the docks he pushed aside people in his path, to catch the giant boat crawling away from the city. He quickly flashed his ticket to the guards and yanked himself into the boat through the moving doors.
"Well," J said exhaustedly to his partner Charmelion. "We made it!"

-chapter 1-


The Sunday view from the S.S Anne looked much like a Picasso picture. The sky was as gray as the Vermilion City High Street buildings. The water's green color represented the Christmas tree waiting for Decorations.
Chameleon leaned over the side of the massive ship wondering if it would get light enough for him to spot a Juicy Magikarp to feast on. Professor J was leaning back on his private seat trying to spot Scarlet Dock. He knew that it would be almost a week before landing but he still eagerly checked for the Scarlet Mountains.
The day before when they were leaving the Massive Kanto Region. The sky was a vivid blue smiling on Cinnabar Island. The Tentacool swarmed around the boat, looking for protection. After leaving Kanto behind A fog surrounded them, like an explosion coming from Jerpho it swallowed them whole.
As they checked a news channel on T.V. for forecasts, they saw an unforgetful sight on the news. "Golden City home of the Jerpho Elite 4 was destroyed last night by a Poke'mon seeking global domination,” The anchorman said with sweat rolling down his cheeks.” I was there trying to avoid the monster, but citizens of Golden city were too late."
Chameleon made a frighten glance at Prof.J wondering what would happen to them...Scarlet was 23 miles East of Golden city! Then J turned to Chameleon and flatly said,” Our job was to find what mysterious power was in Jepho; according to this....Our search will not be in vain."

1.2-The Islands

It was Thursday on the S.S Anne. The sky still had not let up and Charmeleon was still looking for his feast. Today once they got to a nearby archipelago the S.S. Woodson was scheduled to escort them to the docks. The reports of Golden City were becoming worse every minute.

The death toll had reached 2,000 and damage costs to 1.4 Billion Dollars. Charmeleon was still shaken up by the news report but he had recovered. You see the thought of his brethren doing this made him think, “What is wrong with our world?” The power was nicknamed Joltorb, a mythical Poke’mon believed to originate north of Jerpho.

The Woodson met up with them at noon in a small island area. The captain was yelling,”GO BACK TO KANTO!!! NOW!!!” Then J replied,”We need to get to the docks!!!” The Woodson captain sat there then nodded.

Then the black waving clouds spawned a waterspout. It was dark green and looked like a wild roller coaster, waiting for passengers. The Woodson started turning away from the funnel and rushed to the side of the S.S. Anne. The captain jumped from the Woodson to grab on to the Anne. That was the last mistake he ever made.

“Put the ship in high speed!” J shouted to the captain. “We will burn our engines before we ever get close to Redson!” the captain shouted back. “I’m willing to take that chance!” J said while stumbling to the pilot seat and smashing the hi-speed button.

“But We will burn out the eeee eeeeeeee eeeeeeeeeee eeeeeeennnnnnnnnn nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!” The captain started to say before the ship blasted off into the sea

-Chapter 1.3-

- Redson City Nears-

The alarms of the S.S. Anne were buzzing out of control accompanied by red flashes lighting up J’s brown wavy hair. Then a noise from the engine room made all other noise seem to disappear. It had seemed that fireworks had exploded inside the ship. The S.S. Anne had crashed into land. A nearing fire made the evacuation quicker. Then the engine room was exposed.

In one flash, the ship was blown to pieces. The light had shown some nearby seaport. This was Redson, The Hub of South-East Jerpho.

The inner streets looked like an atom bomb had hit it. It was black were grass was most likely placed. The buildings were 2 stories tall and had all broken windows crammed with blankets and pillows belonging to the poor. The power lines were believed to have been knocked down by unhappy previous citizens.

As they reached Main Street they saw the only middle-class houses for miles. Turning towards Scarlet they found a destroyed sign that stated. SCARLET CITY 67 MILES, GOLDEN CITY 89 MILES and DANGER DO NOT ENTER SCARLET MOUNTIANS!

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< My first Shiny!!!!
my response

By the way please REPLY!!!
We need your thoughts on this story so far!!!!!!!!!
Thank you

by the way I am WORKING on chapter 2. Should be done next week!
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Please don't double post! That's what the edit button is for! (also to fix the typo you made)

The story is good and it is pretty descriptive, but it needs more length and more suspense and visual descriptions. But it has potential... I'm looking forward to seeing the next chapter!


< My first Shiny!!!!
Joltorb Rises Chapter 2

Thank you for reading the story so far!!!! Chapter 2 will be a lot better. Guaranteed or your money back!!! Subchapter 1 is very long READ AT OWN RISK

-Chapter 2-
A Small Path to Scarlet Cave

2.1 The Small Tower.

In Redson City the captain had left to go find a new ship, but had never come back. About a week after he left, the team started on their journey to Scarlet City. It has been more than a week since they left and they are 59 miles away from Scarlet.

DAY 15 ON LAND– 60 Miles Away from Scarlet Cave-

‘That’s great just great,” J said sarcastically. “We ran out of supplies and the closest place to get anything is 40 miles away at the Fishing Docks!”

Charmelion seemed to roll his eyes and say, “This would not have happened if you hit the Hi-Speed button!”

“I can’t change the past Charmelion!” J yelled back at the Poke’mon. (J had found a bond with Charmelion a long time ago, now it seems that J can “Hear” what Charmelion is saying to him.) “Just forget it!”

“Good morning trainer,” a rough voice stated from the bushes. “What brings you to humble Red City?”

“What?” J inquired. “A city, what city?” J yelled awhile jumping up from his sitting position.

“Not a city, a training facility,” The skinny young man stated with a roar. “You have not heard of the Poke’mon Training Facility?”

“Can I train here,” J asked excitedly. “What do I have to do?”

“Beat me in a 2 on 2 Poke’mon Battle,” The man stated quietly.

“You’re on,” J yelled.

“Come to my tower,” The man cheered pointing at a small red brick building with dust collecting on it.

The tower inside was as ugly as the outside of the building. There was a few scrolls pilled on top of one of the another. All stated important rules of the Dojo.

“Are you ready,” The man asked.

“Yes I am,” J stated pulling two poke’ balls to his sides.

“Tentacruel and Feralligater go,” The man yelled.

“Mewtwo, Charmelion show them how it’s done,” J said with a smile.

The fight began. Tentacruel shot Charmelion with a bright white hyper beam making Charmelion start to get pushed back. Feralligater spit out a big, blue, and eye shattering explosion at Charmelion. Mewtwo jumped in the way of the attack and shot a dark purple ball at the two un-expecting Poke’mon. All at once Charmelion and Mewtwo gave it everything they had and defeated the Water type Poke’mon in just a few seconds.

“Amazing,” The shaken man gulped watching J go off into the sunset.

And you thought that J would be a wimp!

2.2- Fishing Rally

“Welcome to Jepho Fishing Rally 2007!” The P.A. boomed. ”This year we are located 19 miles South-East of Scarlet City!”

“Wow, It took 17 days just to get to Scarlet Dock,” J exclaimed to Charmelion after seeing the tournament ahead. ”How about for fun we compete in the fishing rally?”

“Okay, As long as I get a fish to eat,” Charmelion nodded.

Overlooking the Fishing Rally J found that over 1,000 men were competing. All had on red vests and black pants and boots. To the left were 2 small boxy buildings with armed guards looking for signs of Joltorb. Children were goggle-eyed looking up at the black fog. After signing up and retrieving a uniform the PA sounded.

“Gentlemen here are the rules!” PA started. ”The First man with 20 Magikarp wins! You may only catch Magikarp! Other entries will get you disqualified! Keep on the lookout for Joltorb! Evacuate if seen! NOW BEGIN!”

All the men cast their rods like a wave going down the bridge. J got Charmelion to hit the Non-Magikarp back into the sea with his fire blast. By the time the lead fisher got 18 Magikarp. A loud hum came across the sky. The bridge lighted yellow and every-one stopped. J looked up into the sky and yelled,”Its Joltorb RUN!”

The guards started firing machine guns at the shadow. Then a fire ball came down and destroyed the buildings. The explosions were like a grenade sending metal everywhere.

The fishers started quickly stealing loose Magikarp Poke’ balls from the injured. 4 fishers all grabbed for the trophy until a fire ball sent them flying into the sea. J was racing away tripping the desperate crooks. Fireballs were flinging out of control behind him, following his every move. Of course crooks were following him, so he grabbed his Magikarp and started flinging the balls back towards the men.

Out of range of the attacks he heard piercing screams accompanied by large fire balls. The whole docks were in flames with a moving bolt of lightning orbiting it. No one could have made it out. This was the beginning of a Poke’mon War


Chapter 3 coming in next few days!
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It was okay, 'cept the description. I don't know what the guy looks like.
Charmelion, I know what it look's like, but it's still lovely to
hear it described.

It was short, to short, that's really all that needs to be fixed,
I can see it go far. I like it.

As always, be kind to the mime.


< My first Shiny!!!!
Joltorb Rises!!! Chapter 3.1

If you are wondering…..This chapter is THE BEST PART!!!!!

-Chapter 3-

Intro to c.3
After escaping Joltorb’s attack on the fishing rally, J and Charmelion avoided going in to the city and went to the West. Now about 4 miles West of Scarlet, They go to Poke’mon experts to find a way to defeat, no KILL Joltorb.

3.1 Scott and Ole’s shack

-FLASHBACK- 1998, Blackthorn City

A ten-year-old boy squatted on the ground outside the Ice Caves. He had bright brown hair and small freckles dotting his nose. He always wore a long white trench coat and long black pants. (To this day he still does!) His eyes sparkled Emerald with companion detached earlobes, which seemed to even his face. He was very tall, 5ft 6ins back at the age of 9.

Today his father would come back with his professor team. The name of this boy was James Elm jr. AKA J; his father had the same name. J. E. sr. was the head researcher of Johto. His new job was to investigate the East caves of Johto.

A Charmander was crying out “Char Char Char!” It was scooted up by the door to the caves. Two Rocket members were coming up with guns aiming for the Charmander. “CHAR!!!!!” He cried out.

“NO!” J cried out jumping in front of the blow. Then his leg seemed to burst.

And the rest is history!

-Back to the present-

J has had this dream for the last 9 years, repeated over and over again. Somehow he thought it was a vision. What might happen soon. He had camped out on the Peak of Joins Mountain, the 2nd highest peak in the Poke’mon Mountains. On the highest peak was a rusty old shack where the 2 best experts on Poke’mon in Jerpho lived.

Once up he crawled into the shack where Scott and Ole’ greeted him. Ole’ was the smarter of the two; He was a plump man that wore overalls with hick clothes. His feet seemed to be big enough to smash a Jigglypuff. Scott was much like J, but his eyes were a dark blue.

“You made it J!” Scott cheered. “I thought Joltorb would have got you!”

“Forget the greetings,” J stubbornly announced. “Let’s get to business.”

Awhile they discussed, J looked around at the shack. It was like Red Tower, a heap of brown nothingness. All that decorated the room were 2 gold computers.

The plan was to get Joltorb into the Scarlet caves where they could blind him. Then use a special new Poke’ ball design to catch him. “That would be easy to predict, why call you geniuses,” J joked.

The friendly laughter was stopped by a hum in the air. J looked down to Ole’ and Scott.


By the way who is the dummy that rated mine 2 stars?

If i double post it is becuase you, the reader are not repling and I want to make sure that they don't overlook the new sub chapter! They will avoid allready read things. Sincerley DUDE-Z
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< My first Shiny!!!!
Joltorb Rises chapter 3.2

Now witness the most important chapter. DUH IT’S NAMED AFTER THE STORY!!!!!

3.2- Joltorb Rises

J grabbed his coat and started down the Mountain. Scott and Ole’ were leading an army of giant Poke’mon down almost like looking at the 1700’s British Army.

The cold brisk air was freezing J’s face. All he could see was the city in ruins with a bright white light swarming around it. The explosions of buildings could be heard from four miles to the west.

Then a beam hit the peak of the Trinis Mountain. The three were thrown of the edge. In a frantic frenzy Ole’ was sending back his Poke’mon and flinging the balls back into his backpack. In his last moments of conscious, J grabbed the ledge of another mountain and pulled the other two on.

Scarlet City was a dark city with tall, steel, and rusty buildings. The city was surrounded by 3 caves and a massive forest. It was cut in half by a river. Above that river was a shadow a little taller then J with two red sparks on his face. Joltorb was standing right in front of three helpless men and a Charmelion.

A battle was soon to happen. Joltorb started to light up starting to show his true appearance. J grabbed another Poke’ ball from his belt, Ole and Scott grabbed two of their balls. Then at once the phrases were called out. “Mewtwo, Charmelion Destroy him,” Called J. “Raichu and Octillery get him,” Ole shouted. “Snorelax, Blastoise get rid of him,” Scott finished.

Joltorb’s true appearance was like a Mewtwo with Raichu ears. He was tall with yellow and red streaks going down his black body. Unlike Mewtwo his legs were more human-like. He looked extremely bored and seemed to want to actually have a challenge.

All of the team’s Poke’mon shot their best attacks all at once at Joltorb. Joltorb held up his hand and with no effort made a plasma shield and hit back the shots at the Poke’mon making them near their destruction. Joltorb laughed at them until he made another ball of giant flaming plasma.

Then Scott found a metal sword and ran at Joltorb aiming for the neck. With no alarm Joltorb morphed his plasma into a sword and countered the attack. Scott and Joltorb were chunking attacks at each other. Joltorb wasn’t even breaking a sweat, He was easily blocking everything. Scott gave one last shot; He jumped into the air with his sword above him yelling. Joltorb quickly decapitated him. Scott shouted one last thing to Ole before the attack was done, “Fuse the Atom NOW!!!!!”

Ole replied with pressing his watch. Then Scarlet City was destroyed. Everyone was thrown back, J sent back Mewtwo and grabbed on to Charmelion. The other Poke’mon was dead. All except Joltorb that is, the plan had failed and Scott was dead.


< My first Shiny!!!!
Joltorb Rises Chapter 3.3

3.3 A never-ending battle

Three bodies were lying by each other. A headless body was bathed in blood with a sword in one hand. A body of a scientist was slammed against the wall of the cave. A plump body was by the river with a leg bent out of shape. By them was a Charmelion under a pile of steel.

Joltorb was walking towards them with a sword in his left hand. He knew the scientist, the plump man, and the Charmelion were still alive. He stepped closer to the nearest of the three and was about to thrust down his sword. The scientist rolled to the other side of the blast only a foot away from the plasma. J grabbed Scott’s sword and started to duel Joltorb. Joltorb was blocking every shot by J. As the battle intensified Ole’ started to get up to see that a glow was coming from the pile of steel.

The plasma was burning part of J’s coat. He kept trying to protect the exposed skin from Joltorb. J thrust his sword at Joltorb with all his might. With one lucky shot he got 2 inches away from Joltorb. J was getting very tired from the battle and was hoping some help would arrive. Then the army answered his plea.

An army of 200 tanks and 1,000,000 solders had got on top of Mt. Apocalypse. Joltorb jumped into the air making him out of sight. “Where is he,” The Commander yelled at his troops. An explosion answered. Joltorb was running down the aisles of men destroying them with no effort. He got down to the last 200 tanks and the commander.

“You can’t destroy my tanks,” he laughed at Joltorb. Joltorb, angered by this comment, raised his hand and shot a huge plasma bomb and successfully destroyed the army.

Charmelion’s eyes went total dark ruby colored. His body was burning like the sun. The steel melt around him. Charmelion roared and seemed to explode. A tall dark dragon appeared instead of Charmelion. “Now Joltorb is going to get it,” Ole’ yelled.

Charzard sped at Joltorb. With no effort, Joltorb raised his hand again and shot Charzard. Immediately vaporized, Charzard was added to the death toll.

Just when it could not get any worse, it just gets worse
The ending chapter will be posted as soon as you reply so......... REPLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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this was agood story . i like all the elements. i dont like one thing in all though.


< My first Shiny!!!!
;351; thank you for your reply (at least you did)
chapter 4(the last chapter I might add!) will be put up next week!!!!!

meanwhile REPLY REPLY REPLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Let's just say chapter four fetures, J going loopy, Something happens to Ole' , and the stupid army tries once agian to defeat Joltorb.

The end is near.


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< My first Shiny!!!!
Joltorb Rises! The Final Chapter!

ummmm thanks(i think?!)

Welcome to chapter 4

-soon will edit, have not written 4.3 yet...-(edit:it is posted!)

Chapter 4- Captured and Abandoned

Intro to C.4- On September 17, 2007. Joltorb had single-handily destroyed the Jerpho armies. One person that was hurt not only physically but emotionally was a young Professor that had turned 19 the same day that his life-long friend died.

Chapter 4.1 - The Atom Ball

J was lying on the ground with no emotion visible on his face. He was gazing at the ground where Charzard was before he was vaporized. Once Joltorb had flown off, Ole had crawled to J.

“Come on J, we need to get back to the shack,” Ole yelled. J was forcing a pipe down on his neck. “Stop it J,” Ole yelled. “I know you have known him for almost 10 years but, this might happen to everyone if we don’t go capture Joltorb!”

J looked back and said,” No DESTROY Joltorb!” He got up and started to make a evil grin at Ole. “Make him suffer.”

Once in the shack, J showed Ole the plans to a new Poke’ball. The inside was a torture chamber that would destroy the “resident”

J demonstrated with a piece of steel wool. “Now watch,” J yelled. He caught the steel wool with the strange Poke’ball. He released it again to show a pile of dust quickly melting in the environment. J went on to say that it had the power of the Master Ball.

He named it the Atom Ball. They decided after catching Joltorb they would throw the ball into Mt. Ion, the massive volcano to be sure that they killed him.

The plan would be great and J’s greatest revenge.

Chapter 4.2- Last Battle

J and Ole’ had the country depending on them. They had made one last formation around Joltorb. J to the northeast of Joltorb, in charge of the one Atom Ball. Ole was 1 mile south of the battle in a large dugout battle ground along with 100 elites. The ground between Ole and J was a 10,000 men army surrounding the building where Joltorb was stationed.

“---Ole’, we have breached the bank building, can you see us?” J whispered into the COM watch.

“Yeah, something is moving on the top floor; try to get them to bomb it!” Ole’ yelled frightened by the yellow glow from the bank’s 12th floor.

“Code 15!” J yelled to the general.

The general nodded and pointed his 4th finger at the building. In a frantic frenzy, the men quickly ran from the building as they signaled for the fighters. A red glow filled the sky as the fighter swooped over the bank building. A bomb was dropped from its black bottom. At that second Joltorb crashed out of the building right in front of the army.

All at once the sky was glowing red as all of the tanks, solders, and SWAT opened fire on Joltorb. His plasma shield of burning yellow was quickly wearing away but his eyes burned red and he flew at the army shooting as many fire balls possible. J was running from the one thing that he was trying to destroy. Then J turned back at Joltorb, he sent out Mewtwo and ordered Mewtwo to shoot everything he had at Joltorb.

11,000 things were shooting Joltorb all at once. He was starting to burn, his power was for a first time failing. He fell down on the ground in a great pile. J walked up with the Atom Ball in his hands. He raised it then pressed a single button on the orb. All at once the sky was immediately cleared from its fog. The shine from the ball capturing Joltorb was too great to see. In a big cosmic blue flash everything possible was being sucked into it like a powerful Tornado. Everything but Joltorb was then thrown back nearly 1 mile from their starting point.

J’s coat was burnt to a crisp. The dugout protecting Ole’ had been worn away. The bank building quickly fell down on its supports. Everyone immediately sighed, it was almost over.

All that was left was Mt. Ion………………

Chapter 4.3- end

In Ion Village, everyone possible was celebrating as J and Ole’ strode into town. J had been grinning for the first time in 3 weeks, since before the fishing rally. Ole had a look of no emotion. It was not over yet, he was the only one that knew that. J had handed him the atom ball on their way to the village and Ole realized that Joltorb still had the power to break free. They HAD to quickly go up into Mt. Ion.

Ole was then separated from the others in flashing white paparazzi. He looked back then quickly darted up the steep hills of the volcano. J was yelling back at him to stop and get them out of that mess. “Hey he has Joltorb,” One girl reporter screamed at Ole. Everyone was trying to chase him down the hills around the volcano.

The ball was starting to force itself open on Ole’s waist. “I need to get up to the top,” Ole groaned loudly. The volcano was also shaking rapidly. He saw spurts of red flames touching the pitch black side of Mt. Ion. He kept running up the mountain faster and faster. By the time he got to the top the flames were coming down in a steady downpour.

The ball shot out a blue blast up out of the smoke. Ole was terrified more by this than the invisible lava coming around the other side.

To J and the reporters, it was a volcano just covered with smoke and an aqua colored blast shooting up to the sky. Then the intense, burning, and dark red lava poured down the side. Everyone started to scatter like little ants from predators.

J knew that he needed another plan.

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< My first Shiny!!!!
Thank you for replying! So who's next?
PS Be on the lookout for the sequl next year!
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Well-Known Member
The chapters are WAY too short. Only post one chapter at a time instead of chopping it into three pieces. The description is nice, though.

Concentrate on spending more time on the chapters so that they can be longer. Readers like a good chapter that takes a long time.
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