First of all, I'm not sure character profiles are entirely necessary. A small summary of them is fine, if it's out of story, like what you did with the introduction, but whole profiles don't really need to be included. You can do them for yourself, sure, to pin things down, but we, the audience, shouldn't need them. We should be shown what they look like, how they act etc., through the text, not shown pictures.
As for your protagonist...does he have any downsides? He's loyal, he's funny, and he cares about his friends (that last line, incidentally, can just be merged with "loyal"), but there aren't any flaws. He sounds perfect, and based on his appearance, looks perfect. We can't really relate to someone like that. And as Yami said, his appearance isn't that original; he just looks like Kaiba from Yu-Gi-Oh!. Really, the audience should be allowed to visualise the character for themselves, not have an exact representation.
Again, the appearance isn't original, just a moe anime girl that can be found virtually everywhere on the Internet, and no real aesthetic quirks. Most of the characters in Kingdom Hearts usually have belts and/or zippers, something that physically defines them, but the pictures you've chosen could apply to literally anyone.
Define what you mean by "blonde" as well, as I'm sure everyone has their own interpretations as to what it means: to some, a dumb bimbo; to others, a catty bitch. Moving aside from that, again she's a stereotypical anime girl, kind and caring and a regular little Florence Nightingale. Like before, there's no sense of originality, and again, she sounds perfect.
Again, I don't get a sense of originality or detail. What's his sense of humour - over-the-top slapstick, dry sarcasm, or loathesome "ZOINKS I'M MAD ME!!!!11" randomness? When would he start acting serious, if someone ate the last eclair or if someone was in danger? Please specify, and also show a bit of flair; make the characters stand out. As mentioned, there's the typical zips and belts, but also personal quirks. Maybe they have bad luck, maybe they get easily embarassed, maybe they have a distrust of squirrels.
And while we're on the subject, there needs to be a good reason as to why they have Oathkeeper and Oblivion; those are personal Keyblades to Sora, they represent Kairi and Riku respectively. You were able to create your own Keyblade for Jordan; make ones for them as well.
I won't bother with the rest, as I'm pretty sure I've made my point clear. Now let's get down to the festering bone marrow of the matter.
This is a common problem with first-time writers, in that you try to tell too much in too short a space of time. Pacing is crucial to any good story; it seems like you're rushed, like you're saying "OK, so this boy's falling into the water, then he's gonna get crushed, then he isn't, then he's on a stained glass platform, then he sees weapons, then he gets knighted by the King of France, then this, then that, then this, etc."
Do you get what I mean? You're trying to hurry the story along, so emotional impact - Jordan can see the potentially fatal wave coming towards him - isn't registered aside from a yell. You also have the habit of being listy; I'll show you what I mean using two examples, one's yours, one's mine:
You see? We know the boy has brown hair, but it isn't just read off like a list. We also know the boy is falling just through the description. I'm not asking you to copy and paste that, but try and do something similar: show, not tell.
And the use of Internet slang like OMG isn't really encouraged either.
I can tell he's surprised by a disembodied voice, but I get nothing else; indignation? Curiosity? Anger? And the weapon choices are ridiculously unbalanced: two are evil and nasty, the other is good and righteous. There's no surprise to be had there, as we now know what he's going to choose. The original Dream Weapons had their own pluses and minuses. The Sword represented courage but also destruction; the Rod represented intelligence but also ambiguity; the Shield represented kindness but also weakness.
Because we know Jordan will end up with the good option, there's no tension, and we don't even have to read what happens next. If you must have these, make them more balanced, don't just make one the right path. That's the whole point of the Awakening: to see which path best suits you.
I would also like to point out that just because you're a thief, doesn't mean you're a despicable coward. Look at Aladdin.
Again, you're listing, and you're also getting repetitive. "The Dealie came out from the Doohickey Orb. The Thingy emerged from the Fishhead Orb." Do you see what I mean? It just gets boring, and again we can just skip this because you've already told us in your profiles, and with the Trident, that he's going to go for Water.
Is there even a need for him to go to each one? Are all the Awakenings taking place simultaneously, or have some already chosen?
Again, pace yourself; you're going through this faster than is necessary. There's no build-up, no tension.
Pacing again, and you seem to keep changing tenses here. Also, we don't need him to keep speaking; describing his emotions, the fear on his face, his hands shaking despite him firmly grasping the trident; that would be fine. Have a bit of speech, but don't pepper us with it. It breaks the story's flow.
As of now, the biggest problem you have is flow. Remember, this is your story, it can be as long or as short as you like, but this being Kingdom Hearts, it will be more difficult. The games' stories are driven by relationships, by sinister powers, so you need to take your own time in writing it. Too fast, and you don't make any impact on the audience. Despite what the other people might say, I don't feel any emotional connection to Jordan. So really, I'd say work on the pacing and description.
Hope this advice helped you, and good luck with future writing.
and please tell me when you write your next chapter