Inside joke from work. Anyhow, I just learned about the stupid sex differences between Pokemon in dimaond and pearl. I ain't happy. But in spirit of the game, here's some sexual dimorphism of my own!
Machoke: we all know that Machoke is little more than a grey human, and human females are NEVER muscular and ALWAYS busty, and Machoke is no different! She has huge hips for which to pop babies, because women have little other use besides cooking, am I right? She has no crests because that's too masculine, and finally this beauty has flirtacious eyelashes because love is more important than fighting.
Gardevoir: Like Machoke, Gardevoir is just a white and green human, and because all human men are ripped and have testosterone to blood ratio of 3:1 (if that makes sense), male gardies are just big muscleheads who smash beer cans and snarl all day.
Houndoom: like in nature, male animals are strong and hunt for the weaker females who just wait patiently at the nest taking care of the babies, so female Houndoom have small muzzles and no claws or fangs and almost non-existant horns. She has a flower around her neck because skulls are scary and she must look pretty for her strapping sperm-shooting mate. She also has big innocent eyes to indicate to other Pokemon that she is very freindly and docile, just like all female animals.
Clefairy: pink is a girl color, and smiling is a girl expression, so this blue bad boy just stands around and frowns all day. He also doesn't frolic because that's gay, and I bet all Pokemon are straight just like humans, who are only gay when tempted by Satan. Also, he has no curls, because it's not like it's important to the species' physical appearance or anything, right?
Machoke: we all know that Machoke is little more than a grey human, and human females are NEVER muscular and ALWAYS busty, and Machoke is no different! She has huge hips for which to pop babies, because women have little other use besides cooking, am I right? She has no crests because that's too masculine, and finally this beauty has flirtacious eyelashes because love is more important than fighting.
Gardevoir: Like Machoke, Gardevoir is just a white and green human, and because all human men are ripped and have testosterone to blood ratio of 3:1 (if that makes sense), male gardies are just big muscleheads who smash beer cans and snarl all day.
Houndoom: like in nature, male animals are strong and hunt for the weaker females who just wait patiently at the nest taking care of the babies, so female Houndoom have small muzzles and no claws or fangs and almost non-existant horns. She has a flower around her neck because skulls are scary and she must look pretty for her strapping sperm-shooting mate. She also has big innocent eyes to indicate to other Pokemon that she is very freindly and docile, just like all female animals.
Clefairy: pink is a girl color, and smiling is a girl expression, so this blue bad boy just stands around and frowns all day. He also doesn't frolic because that's gay, and I bet all Pokemon are straight just like humans, who are only gay when tempted by Satan. Also, he has no curls, because it's not like it's important to the species' physical appearance or anything, right?
