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Metroid Hunters: Deadly Invasion

NFreak

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EDIT: I forgot to put the rating in the title. it's rated PG-13. Violence, weapons, and slight swearing.

Ok, this is basically my first ever fanfic, so don't be surprised if it's a bit, er, terrible. =P Anyway, though, in order to understand this, you'll need to read one of the Alimbic Lore from the actualy game (which I'll post at the end of chaper 2, since then you'll understand what happened). Also, you might not understand this if you've never played Hunters, but hey, you might. xD Well, might as well try it now.


________________________________________________________________
Chapter 1 - Unwanted Reunion

"Samus Aran, your mission is complete. Head back to the Galactic Federation immediately."

The Alimbic Cluster is saved. The evil known as Gorea, whoch had wiped out the whole Alimbic Order, had been defeated. The "Ultimate Power," the Omega Cannon has been put in a safe in Samus's ship. Samus was just heading back to Federation to recieve her next mission, and to rest. Until....

"You dare try to interfere with my plan of obtaining the Ultimate power for the Kriken Empire?!"

Trace, a spider-like Kriken, was directly behind Samus, tracking her down. Then, a barrage of deadly Imperialist lasers!

"Is that... Trace? His ship has built-in Imperialist cannons?!"

But, Trace wasn't the only one there. Pretty soon there were six ships behind Samus!

"Of all the times for my ship's weapons to be in Federation for repairs! Attention Federation. I am under attack by the six others who were after Omega Cannon and Gorea. I may not make it back. Send backup immediately."

"Where are you?" asked one of the operatives at the Federation.

"Alimbic Cluster Outskirts, close to the Celestial Archives. Heading towards Base."

"Affirmative."

"Activate autopilot, Galactic Federation," Samus commanded the ship.

Samus soon ran to the safe, and grabbed the Omega Cannon, and climbed through the ship's hatch.

"I could get killed for this, but I have no choice."

With one well-aimed shot, the Omega Cannon fired and hit Kanden's ship directly on the nose. from there, the blast caused all seven bounty hunters to lose control of their ships. Samus tried to get back into the ship, but the hatch was unoperational!

"The captains always go down with their ships."

And Samus Aran stood there, staring into the distance, knowing she was about to die. But, off in the distance, in the Alimbic Cluster....

"Meteor shower? But... nothing like that can ever happen in the Alimbic Cluster. But, what are they? Wait a second....."

But, the other hunters gained control of their ships, but they weren't shooting at Samus. They were looking in the same direction. But, little did they realize that another ship, and a giant one at that, was coming towards all seven of them.

"Oh... My.... God... Those aren't asteroids..." Samus said in shock.

Then, while they were all staring, they were being sucked into the giant ship behind them!
_________________________________________________________________




Kinda short, and dumb, but hey, it's my first fanfic. Chaper 2 coming soon! And any advice and critiques welcome. ^^

I promise, the next chapter'll be longer.
 
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Well, this was pretty interesting. I don't have a DS, so I've never played Hunters, but I could understand what was going on pretty well. I didn't see any mistakes in your grammar, so that's good. But you didn't give us enough description, so that was really the only con. Overall, it was a pretty good story. I'll be reading the next chapter.
 

NFreak

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Fez the Mysfit Elf said:
But you didn't give us enough description, so that was really the only con.
Thanks, I'll keep that in mind. ^_^

Btw, here's the Lore quote I mentioned.
At first we thought Gorea was a comet. It crashed upon our planet
and emerged as a vapor.
There's a lot more lore on it in the game, but I'd rather have you wait. >=)
 
i'll be awaiting the next chapter too, I've just started to write my own Metroid fic, so be prepared for some competition! Don't worry though, I'm not here to steal ideas, just to observe and critique.

~fuzzy out~
 

NFreak

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Thanks for the comments. Chapter 2 is coming this afternoon, after I think about it a bit more. Unless two of my friends come over, then you'll have to wait. But think about it, the longer you wait, the more time I have to think of ideas, and then the next chapter'll be even better! xD

EDIT: Sory guys, might take a bit longer. My week off from school just ened and I don't have much time to write. I'll try to get it tomorrow, though.
 
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NFreak

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Chapter 2 - They're not Asteroids
____________________________

The hunters were completely nervous. Where are they? What happened to them? And what was with that meteor shower? Samus was still trying to hold onto her own ship in the vacuum-like tunnel. Losing her grip, she immediately crashed onto the front of Trace's ship.

"Get off my ship, you pervert!" shouted Trace, annoyed, yet still wondering the same three questions as the others.

Samus just ignored him, mainly to the fact that the pressure of the tunnel was pushing her against the ship. But then, she quickly flew right back into the back of her own ship. Looking around, the hunters guessed it was a docking bay. Small robots teleported into the room, and Samus quickly recognised them; Federation docking bots.

"What kind of retard would send those things to try to attack us?" Kanden said, laughing like crazy. "Hey, wait. Let go of my ship you little pests!"

Their ships were easily carried by the bots to open areas, in front of airlocks. Samus was already walking towards the docking bay's lockdown switch, since six dangerous bounty hunters were in the area. A nearby screen soon turned on, showing one of the Federation's leaders; a video transmission.

"Samus Aran. Your mission is complete, but there are still some problems. You cannot rest. There is another mission ahead of you."

"Yes, I know. These six were after the 'ultimate power' for their own reasons; Trace, for acceptance and to lead the Kriken empire to universal invasion. Kanden, for terrorism. Noxus's reason is unknown. Sylux, to destroy the Federation. Spire's reason is also unknown. And Weavel, to kill me due to our past battles, where I was always victorious." Samus said that last part with a bragging tone.

"Stop being cocky, this is serious," sternly stated the leader.

"Sorry, sir. Anyway, they must all be destroyed, or put into the prisoner cell."

The hunters were now all wondering what would happen to them. They tried to activate their ships, but the lockdown disabled them, due to the Federation "tags" the bots attached to them. They were now forced to accept their fate.

"Actually, Samus, they will not have any punishment," the leader stated, now more serious than ever. "You may have noticed a meteor shower as you were leaving the Alimbic Cluster."

"Yes, I have. And I have also found something out before I was brought into this base."

"We have already found out. Anyway, you all need rest. We will take the weapons and disable the alternate forms of the other bounty hunters. You will all need some rest before your next mission."

Samus could not control her rage any longer. "What?! There's no way we're keeping them in here! They're dangerous criminals and must be eliminated!"

"SAMUS! CALM DOWN OR YOU WILL BE PUNISHED! Anyway, they are all needed on our next mission. Now, go get some rest."


Later that day (or as the clock in the base shows), Samus was starting to control herself. But, there were still many things on her mind. Why were the other hunters being allowed to stay in the base and not in the prisoner chamber? And why were they necessary for the next mission?

"I've got more important things to worry about. What's for dinner? I'm starving!"

As if they read her mind, the speaker in her "room" called to her, "Samus, Kanden, Spire, Trace, Noxus, Sylux, and Weavel, please report to the dining area." Surprisingly, when Samus got there, she noticed the other hunters acting very polite, as they were told to do.

"How much did they bribe you to act like this anyway, Sylux?" Trace whispered to Sylux.

"Actually, $250. Then again, they're humans, so I don't know how much that is in my own area."

Many other side conversations started while they were eating (including the fact that all the other hunters were surprised that Samus was human, and even more surprised she was female). But then, the leader who appeared on the transmission in the docking bay came out onto a stand nearby.

"Attention. Attention."

At that moment, everyone became silent.

"I am sure you are wondering why we have not put you into the prisoner chamber. And why we let you stay in some of our best rooms. It is because you are all needed for the most dangerous mission we have ever had."

At this moment, Samus came onto the stage.

" We understand that you and I are all rivals. But this is an important mission. That was not a meteor shower in the Alimbic Cluster earlier. I have looked as far as I could, and had discovered something. Those were not meteors."

"Then what the heck are they?! Cause unless it's something that could destroy the entire Kriken Empire, I won't do a thing!" Trace screamed.

"Oh, you will need to help. This could destroy more than the Kriken Empire. It could also destroy Cylosis, Vho, and the entire universe. There were millions of meteors. But they are NOT meteors....

Everyone was silent and seemed to forget their rivalries at this point. They knew it was something awful.

"They're Goreas...."
_____________________________________________

Imo, I'm getting better at this. =P But, I'm open to comments and critiques, as always. So, just say whatever you want about it. xD
 
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dumdumDUM! XD sorry, it's just the way it ended. I'm not sure though, wasn't Gorea one-of-a-kind? like a somewhat superasteroid yet not an asteroid at all but alas a strange 'alien' if you will? anyways just two mistakes as far as i could see would be you spelled Cylosis wrong, no c after the y and also Vhozon would be the race, Vho is the planet (don't believe me? look at the main movie at the beginning of MPH). Just wondering though, is this supposed to be a somewhat comedy? I'm not 100% sure by the way you used some words...do they even know those words? anyways, good start for your first fic.

~fuzzy out~
 
Well, it was a good chapter, but seeing as how I never played "Hunters", I pretty much am at a loss at what they're talking about in this chapter. Are those other bounty hunters she's with the ones from the Wi-Fi section of the game? Just curious.
 
they are. Trace is the red one, Spire is the one with spikes all over, Kanden is the green and black one, Noxus is the one who turns into a top (the blue one with somewhat skinny legs), Sylux is the other bluish one with the greenish lines in some places and the somewhat rectangular head, and Weavel is the one who has a pony tail. Sorry Nintendo Freak if I'm answering your questions. I'm just a fan/reviewer.

~fuzzy out~
 

NFreak

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Thanks for the comments! ^_^ Btw, fuzzyqwilfish, I edited those spelling errors you pointed out. And yeah, it's kind of an action/comedy thing.

Well, chapter 3 will hopefully be up tonight. If not, sometime soon.

Don't expect any chapters next Thursday and Friday, though. Going to Boston. =)

K, l8er.

EDIT: Sorry guys, chapter 3'll take a while. There's a lot on my mind today, and probably tomorrow, too. And it's kinda hard to write on a day I have school. So just wait a while, k?
 
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NFreak

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Well, just got back from Boston and chapter 3 is here! xD

____________________________________
Chapter 3 - Into the War

At this time, everyone was too shocked to move. Even Sylux, who would have tried to destroy Federation by now wasn't even moving. The room was filled with dread and terror.

"We do not have much time. The Alimbic Cluster, as you know, is void of any intelligent life. The Goreas will train, reproduce, and evolve. There are still traces of all our affinity weapons left on the planets there. The Goreas will eventually be unstoppable. Whether you are a criminal, hero, or looking for your past, WE MUST FIGHT BACK NOW!" Samus screamed, now out of breath.

"But what if-" Noxus started to say, but was instantly silenced.

"There are no buts in right now. For the next week, we will all be practicing advanced combat techniques, techniques I haven't even mastered yet. The Federation has researched all of your species, and have created new 'powers' for all of you; they are the same powers that the Chozo have invented years ago, the ones that are used in my own power su-"

An alarm suddenly started blaring through the station. Blinding flashes of red lights were everywhere. It was the attack alarm!

"The Goreas have crashed through the docking bay windows! Take evasive action IMMEDIATELY!" screamed one of the guards.

"We have no chance to survive! We must make our time! Everyone, use your alt-forms to go grab your weapons! A path to the docking bay will be lit normally, no alarm lights. Use that path to get the docking bay!" Samus was giving out as many orders as possible in this small amount of time.

At this time, however, Samus remembered the Omega Cannon, still in her bunker, which is the farthest from the docking bay than the other hunters'. She would never make it to the ship, but if she left the Cannon, then one of the Goreas would absorb it. The traits would pass to its offspring. They would all have the Omega Cannon ability, at ten fold. Eventually, they would be able to destroy the entire universe. She must go back and get it.

"Samus, what are you doing?!" Sylux screamed. He saw that she was heading for the complete oposite side of the station.

"The Omega Cannon! It's still in my bunker! The Goreas cannot retrieve it!"

"I'll get it! Get back to your ship!" Sylux ordered. Although, the only trust in his voice was fake.

"I can't trust you just yet. We're in a Federation research ship, and everyone knows your grudge against us." Samus then ordered a guard to follow Sylux on his way to the docking bay.

Samus was already almost to her bunker. Getting closer, though, she sensed life.

"That's no guard..."

Next thing she knew, she was face-to-face with another Gorea. But this time, there was no way to fight it without destroying the station. There had to be a way around.

"The leaders are gonna hate me for this..."

Samus then aimed a fully-charged missile directly at a certain point in the wall. It was still being repaired after a major accident months ago. With a deafening explosion, the construction site was yet again an open hole into her bunker.

But then, something quickly grabbed her from behind and started to throw her all around the room! It was a tentacle, the kind that gave the Goreas the hunters' weapons in the first place! But wait. How does it have this ability without the seal sphere?! But there was no time to think about that. The tentacle was smashing her against the wall, destroying everything in sight! Then... another tentacle?! This one looked more menacing for some reason. Now she knew why. It went straight into her chest like a bullet! Weakening, Samus started to collapse. Everything then went black.


Samus came to several hours later. Where was she? She looked around, seeing a very primitive-looking ship. Made of.... rocks? Looking out the ship's window, she found her own ship being towed by this one. Then she realized. She was in Spire's ship.

"Spire? What the heck happened?"

"So, you're awake. Anyway, we were all in the docking bay when we realized that you were missing. The others didn't care. But I know what it's like to lose a... never mind. Never mind. Just a flashback from my past, before the rest of the Diamonts went extinct, when I was only about two. I still don't know what happened.... Anyway, the others were already leaving, but I decided to run back. I remembered you talking about an "Omega Cannon" and figured you were trying to retreive it before a Gorea did."

Samus then looked down at her arm cannon. "Oh... my... God.... That Gorea... it sapped the Omega Cannon right out of me!"

"WHAT?! Isn't that the ultimate power we all heard about? And they took the whole thing... not just a small part like that other Gorea did with the rest of us.. If that's true, then the Goreas will eventually have an army of Omega Cannon users! I'll tell you the rest later. Right now, we gotta catch up with the others and find the Gorea that took the Cannon."

The ship then went into max speed. The Gorea's had the Omega Cannon, able to be passed easily to other Goreas, due to their ability to absorb weapon shots. The war was over before it started....
___________________________________________________________

A bit shorter than the last chapter, but there wasn't much to put in this one anyway.

(Btw, there's an "ALL your base" referance in here somewhere. xD)
 
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You mean this All your base refrence?

Nintendo freak said:
"We have no chance to survive! We must make our time!

Also you didn't realise something. The seal sphere was only on the Gorea that attacked the Amblic's because the Elders put it on him to seal him in the Oblette. In the fic in states the another Gorea has a seal sphere.
 

NFreak

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Controller of Flames said:
You mean this All your base refrence?



Also you didn't realise something. The seal sphere was only on the Gorea that attacked the Amblic's because the Elders put it on him to seal him in the Oblette. In the fic in states the another Gorea has a seal sphere.
Oh, woops. Forgot that. I'll try to somehow state how they got it in the next chapter. I'm thinking just from deep inside Alinos or something, just to give them more power.
 

NFreak

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Controller of Flames said:
You're going to have alot of explaining with the other Gorea's getting the seal sphere's because it states quite clearly in the game that the Ambalic's made only one.
Actually, I was just thinking about that. I might just go back and edit that chapter, make it so it's just a normal Gorea ability, take out the seal sphere completely.

EDIT: Sorry I keep getting busy, but that's life. Really bad allergies, and I'm trying to get this girl to like me (seriously). Mainly cause of my allergies, though. So the next chapter might not come for a few days. Be patient, though. I have a lot of ideas for chapter 4.
 
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No rush, I'm sure we all can wait a bit. I can at least. Only one thing. I know you have to accomidate 7 hunters, but you should give Weavel or Kanden a somewhat big role in the next chapter. Just a thought.

p.s.
good luck with that girl!

~fuzzy out~
 

NFreak

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Actually, I was planning on giving each one of them like a side-story part, when it gets into the war. (Spire just had a somewhat bigger role.) Anyway, you've been waiting for it, and now it's here!

________________________________
Chapter 4 - The Second Secret of Alinos

The Alimbic Cluster was nearer, covered in flames. The Goreas had taken over, and were fighting for supremacy. The other hunters, all ahead, could not get past the falling Goreas. There was almost a solid wall of them.

"Oh my God. They have already spread the Omega Cannon," Samus stated. She had just seen a huge explosion on the Vesper Defense Outpost.

"I'll take care of this," Spire said, confidently. He stepped right out of the boulder-like ship, and started firing Magmaul blasts.

"I think I just found their weakness. They always change to different elements, as we already knew. But, apparently, they all change at the same time! That's why your Magmaul was able to blast through them all!" Samus exclaimed.

Spire then came back into the ship and immediately flew into the rain of Goreas. "Yeah, but eventually they'll be too powerful for these weapons. They always raise their defense, in case you haven't noticed. And... they also have an "alt-form," in a way. Remember, you need the Cannon to defeat that form?"

"Oh cra- Wait a minute. How come there's more fighting on Arcterra, VDO, and the Celestial Archives than on Alinos? Spire, set course for Alinos. There's something wrong there," Samus ordered. She was right. Something was wrong on Alinos... but what?


"Ok, we're here. Now what?" Spire asked, bored.

"Get Trace. We're gonna need stealth here. And if you can, repair my ship. It was slightly damaged from being towed. We'll need it later," Samus ordered.

"Right." Spire unhooked Samus's ship from his own, thenmessaged Trace.

"Trace. This is Spire. We need your help on Alinos; stealth is necessary. Come A.S.A.P. Over."

Almost immediately, Trace came down to the Alinos Gateway. Spire started to get to work on the Samus's starship.

"All right. Samus, you'll need this. It's a cloaking medicine. Usually, we Kriken use them for viruses that disable our natural cloaking ability. It has never been tested on a human, though, so it may be fat-"

Without letting him finish, Samus immediately took off her helmet, held her breat, and swallowed the medicine.

"-al. Did you really just do that?!" Trace finished.

"Well, apparently it's safe. Hey, wait. Why are you trying to help me in the first place?" Samus asked, suspicous of Trace.

"Long story. I'll tell you later. We gotta hurry, though. That medicine will wear off if taken by anyone other than a Kriken. Oh, and in order for it to work, you'll need to be in your Morph Ball, or have the Imperialist equipped. Now, let's hurry!" Trace ordered.

After almost an hour of searching, the two hunters had no idea why the Goreas were afraid to come here, except for a few. And one of those few was right in front of them! Trace immediately held out his arm to block Samus's path.

"What are you do-" Samus began, but was silenced by Trace.

"Gorea. Stand completely still. Even these things can't detect cloaked lifeforms. The cloaking will only be in effect if you stand completely still," trace whispered to Samus.

The Gorea started walking towards them. Trace was right; the Gorea cannot detect them.

"Raaagraah!" The Gorea screamed, frustrated. It then went down into the Council Chamber, out of sight.

"That was close. But... is it just me or is that thing headed to the core of Alin- The core! Years ago, it imploded. That's why Alinos is a molten planet now! Hurry, we have to make it to the core first!" Samus exclaimed.

Trace just shook his head. "No, impossible. I tried when I was looking for the Octoliths. No way down."

"Yes, there is. There is a room near the Combat Hall. it's where I had to place the Octoliths to reveal the Oubliette. There was this thing on the wall, I couldn't scan it or anything. It's probably a new path!" Samus immediately grabbed Trace by the arm and started running towards the Combat Hall.



"C'mon, these things are just gonna keep on coming!"

Kanden and Sylux were on the Oubliette, seeing if there was anything here to defeat the Goreas.

"It's no good! Just run! That place where we were almost killed!" Sylux ordered.

"You mean....," Kanden began to say.

But before he could finish, another ten Goreas were after them. They were in BattleHammer mode!

"Barrage! Go in alt-form!" Kanden shouted.

Kanden easily folded up into the insect-like StingLarvae, as Sylux did into the LockJaw. Leaving behind tons of bombs, they reached the dome-like room, leading to a portal. But, another Gorea was blocking the door!

Coming out of alt, Sylux said in shock, "Oh crap! It's turning black, invincible! It's gonna USE THE OMEGA CANNON!"

And after a huge explosion, the Goreas left this area. Sylux and Kanden were nowhere to be found....


"What the hell is that.....?" Samus said, staring into the (now dry and cold) core of Alinos. There was some kind of huge craeture's body lying there.

"I don't know, but I sure hope it's dead..." Trace said, shocked.

At that moment, Samus accidently released a shot from her arm cannon, shooting the ground below her.

"Nice going, Samus. You just made me realize that... that thing... is.... alive...." Trace said, now starting to back away.

The creature then started to stand. A six-armed, mutant reptile-like thing, and.... it looked even stronger than a Gorea!

"If we can just find a way to train this thing, we'll be able to- OH MY GOD!" The creature just grabbed Samus in the middle of her idea. She could feel her suit slightly snapping under the power of this creature.

"Samus, I just found out what it is! And I could've sworn Metroids weren't in the Alimbic Cluster!" Trace shouted. But then, he immediately started firing Imperialist shots at it.

"Aim for the eyes, Trace! The eyes!" While shouting this, she looked at the thing trying to suffocate her. It was.... some kind of fusion of an Omega Metroid and a Metroid Prime?!

"Samus, try to use your ice beam! This thing lives on Alinos cause it has a giant weakness to cold!" Trace commanded.

Samus was starting to feel dizzy. She would pass out at any minute. just one chance, she thought. Getting some energy into her arm cannon, she fired her Ice Beam. Wait. I also have Noxus's Judicator! Realizing this, she tried to combine the two, just by using the energy in her right arm. A slight fusion shot, and now she just had to FIRE!

The creature's arm immediately froze! "Trace, missiles! Fire as many as you can!"

Under order, Trace shot at least twenty missiles at the Metroid's forearm. Trace's plan worked. The arm cracked off and samus was freed.

"Trace, c'mon. We gotta get out of here! This thing'll kill us if we stay any longer!"

"We just have to remember it. We may be able to free it and have it kill the Goreas later on" Trace said, while running for the exit.

"We can only use that as a last resort. It's too dangerous. Just worry about getting out of here alive!" Samus yelled.



"Ok, we're all gonna need some training. The first day of this war, and all seven of us were almost defeated. Alinos is basically deserted of Goreas. There are only about seven or eight there. We head there in the morning." Samus was sending a transmission to the other hunters. They were all in their own ships on the outskirts of the Alimbic Cluster. They could still see Goreas orbiting around the five planets. The Goreas may be the universe's dominant species soon...
___________________________________________________

Feel free to comment, as always. Now you see what I meant by I was thinking of ideas for this chapter? *shot*

Any way, if you want, I can find pictures of Metroid primes and Omega Metroids, and try to sprite the Metroid that was in that chapter if you want. And I'll scan a picture of a Gorea soon, too. K, later.

~NF

EDIT:
There's a scan from NintendoPower that has a guide on how to beat Gorea. Pictures of Gorea included.

~NF
 
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Good Chapter. I like how you chose one planet and had them "afraid" of the planet. Good chapter, I've got nothing bad to say.

~fuzzy out~
 
A Hunters Fic :) Just what I was looking for. Sometime in the future, I'm planning on creating a Hunters/Pokémon crossover Fic, and I'm quite keen on reading some Fics that involve Hunters.

I like the concept of this. Gorea certainly is the ultimate evil. But millions of them? My gosh, that's just too cool =D

There are certain ideas of yours I really like. Like that medicine Trace gave Samus, and the Omega Metroid Prime.

However, and I'm sorry to say this, but this Fic is not without its problems. It's nothing too major; this is probably one of the first Fics I've read in a long while that has caught and held my interest the whole way through.

The characters are a little dull. If you didn't tell me which character said what, I woulnd't be able to tell who was talking. I can see Spire's personality developing, but apart from that, the characters are a little too similar, which doesn't work well with seven very different characters.

The description is a tad lacking. Again, it's not something to worry about. I can imagine all this happening, and that's because your description is perfectly fine. But at times, the description is lacking, and it sort of throws off the pacing of the story, if you catch my drift.

Other than those two problems, though, I think this is a marvelous story. The premise is excellent, and I'm always interested to see what happens next at the end of your Chapters :) I'll definitely be keeping my eye on this, as this is one of the most promising Fics I've read in a while.

~*CB*~
The 8th Champion
 

NFreak

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Thanks for the comments! And Blizzard, thanks for the tips. This is only chapter 4 out of... I don't know how many xD, but I'm planning on giving each character like a sidestory thing, like their part of the war. During that time, you should start to see a bit more personality, since there wasn't a lot in the beginning chapters.

So, I'll take your advice, and thanks for the comments, too. Chapter 5 should be up in a few days, probably Wednesday. ^^
 
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