Muddy & Flare
Summary: Two Pokémon, one of idiocy and the other of sarcasm ... y join together to answer questions from the audience. And, er, other things. >>
Rated: PG (PG-13 later on for language)
Screw it, I'm reposting Muddy & Flare, the ownage of all talk shows. XP
Just kidding! I'm sure the others pwn this one. But it's okay. Because-
Muddy: I just plain rock.
...Yeah.
Muddy: Hoy!
>>; Anyhoo, the dialouge remains the same, along with the concept, but, of course, in order for this to be here, we have to make it, dare I say, script like.
Muddy: The horror.
Flare: You don't even know how to write-
Shh! They don't need to know that! Enjoy. The first chapter sucks because, er, there are no questions to start it off. Ja.
------------------------------------
::The audience is empty as two lone Pokémon are comfortably seated in two plushy red loveseats, their toes snugglings in between the shaggy, white carpet. The lights blazed hotly above their heads in a warm, golden glow as a sleepy looking Swampert, scratching his light blue head before fiddling with his orange whiskers, wondering what to talk about::
Muddy: ::looks at the camera where a bored Machoke looks through and grins:: Sometimes I wonder at night how my life would be if I wasn't stupid and . . . some other big word like that. Wow . . . life would be that dull? Gasp gasp there buddy . . . haha! Ah, but anyways, I'm-
::The other Pokémon sitting next in the other loveseat pipes in, raising her arms, clicking her talons. She preens down the fiery blaze of orange, red, and tan feathers and directs her sharp, amber eyes toward the Swampert, who's own orange eyes were cast toward the empty audience.
Flare: Stupid? ::ruffles her feathers and smiles innocently at the bored-looking Machoke behind the camera::
Muddy: No, Flare. I'm-
Flare: An idiot?
Muddy: No! I'm-
Flare: Latios?
Muddy: No- well, yeah I am haha, but I'm Muddy!
Flare: Wow, I certainly did not know that at all Muddy! Wow.
Muddy: Well, you sure are stupid then Flare, our name is the title of this story after all! ::looks at her as if it were obvious::
Flare: :
bviously knows that it is the title of the story:: Whatever. Anyhoo, we're two oh so very interesting Po-Muddy: Don't lie to the viewers at home Flare.
Flare: I was being sarcastic you dolt!
Mudy: Geez, sorry. ::looks sadden, but then perks up:: What does sar . . . sarcas . . . s-a-r-c-a-s-t-i-c mean?
Flare: ::rolls eyes and looks straight into the camera:: Do you see what I have to put up with everyday folks?
Muddy: Ah! Is it on me? ::looks around frantically, swatting the air, ending up toppling over in his chair. The camera zooms in on him::
Flare: You're an idiot Muddy.
Muddy: Why bless ya Flare!
::The camera zooms back out as Muddy picks up his chair and sits back down in it. The air was filled with silence. And then, the blue mudfish speaks.::
Muddy: Anyways, I shall explain my life story. I was raised near the country side, born in a milk carton and swam in a puddle of pudding to get Littleroot where rabid Zigazagoons raised me as one of their kin, and then a guy with an alive bunny on his face capture me, and I was sold to Santa Clause and his little elf in red and white wearing a weird shaped hat on his heads. Soon I-
Flare: ::raises an eyebrow:: You were not raised by rabid Zigazagoons.
Muddy: How would you know?
Flare: . . . Good point . . .
Muddy: Haha, I win! As I was saying, I was taken in by the great Zamborginie-
Flare: I thought you said Santa Clause and his little elf in red and white wearing a weird shaped hat on his head. Wait, are you referring to Brendan and May? May is not an elf! Brendan on the other hand-
Muddy: -The GREAT Zamborginie said, "If you wish hard enough, anything can come true or you end up relieving yourself instead!"-
Flare: Well that's a load of BS. Who says stuff like-
Muddy: -So I flew to Channy Isle with the wings that sprouted from my feet. There I fed the hungry Pokémon of . . . um... Tawny . . . yoko. Yeah! Tawnyoko! Seeing those hungry Pokémon . . . it just breaks my heart-
Flare: Muddy?
Muddy: -and you know, you can't have your heart break 'cause, you know, you'll . . . die dude. DIE!
Flare: Don't tell me to die!
Muddy: . . .Fine. Anyway, the great tide of the blue shoe took me away to Hoenn once again where I met this very ugly-looking chicken-
Flare: HEY!
Muddy: And she was all, "Get away from me you ugly blue thing!" So I cried, and the chicken got in trouble.
Flare: Must you tell everyone that story?
Muddy: Of course! It's the only time you got in trouble!
Flare: ::rolls eyes and laces claws:: Moving on . . . How's life going for you guys? Good? Good.
Muddy: My life is . . . stupid! And who are you talking to? No one's here!
::Muddy points to the empty seats that should be filled with audience. Flare chooses to ignore this statement though and retaliates back towards the Swampert::
Flare: Like someone I know in this room.
Muddy: Hey, don't talk about the readers in front of their face!
Flare: Not them! You, imbecile!
Machoke: That's it, I quit!
::The Machoke throws down the wires for the camera to the ground and storms out of the set, flinging open the doors and slamming them shut behind him, leaving behind two startled hosts, the camera focusing on the shaggy red carpet. Muddy gets up from his seat and focuses the camera back on the two right after making funny faces toward the viewers at home. Then he turns around and glares at Flare::
Muddy: Look what you did! You made Imbecile leave!
Flare: If you ever name your Pokémon that . . .
Muddy: It's a compliment in the Machoke lingo. It means face full of shining glory. But Imbecile in my language means face full of cheese. Isn't that, like, funny?
Flare: I'm sure it does. Now what were we talking about? Ah yes, you're the one that's stupid.
Muddy: You're stupid?
Flare: . . . Yes Muddy. I'm stupid.
Muddy: Haha, you're stupid!
Flare: If each story had to have a certain about of brain cells in order for it to be posted, well I dare say that this story would be taken down faster than you can run from an angry mob of girl water Pokémon
Muddy: Shut up! You know they were all over me!
Flare: Yeah, they were trying to beat you up!
::Muddy continually glares at the smirking Blaziken but decides to ignore it by staring at the unmoving camera::
Muddy: It's tough being a Swampert especially with a chicken . . . a fire type chicken. Hmm . . . I wonder Flare . . . If you used your Flamethrower on yourself, would you eat yourself? Is it like having handy dandy food wherever you go?
::Flare looks Muddy's way dully and wearily.::
Flare: I have a question for you? When did you get stupid?
Muddy: Since August 29th, 2003!
Flare: The day you were born huh?
Muddy: Yup, though I didn't show it.
Flare: Sorta anyways.
Muddy: Yeah. Um, anyways . . .
::Muddy looks around frantically again in search and hope of something interesting to pop up, or better yet, another Pokémon to talk to so the show won't end quickly. Luckily, the doors fling open again, and in enters at four-legged hyena with ruffled black and gray fur and red eyes and a Delcatty, who, interestingly enough was preening her dark-brown fur with her soft tongue but still talking clearly enough. Muddy claps excitely as the two Pokémon walk onto the set and sit down on the dark blue couch in between the two loveseats.::
Muddy: Ah, look! It's Skittles and Sirius, are co-hosts Flare!
Flare: I'd clap, but I don't feel like it.
::Skittles, the Delcatty, looks slightly flustered at Muddy's comment and glares at him. Muddy, densely enough, smiles back as if it were a kindly gesture.::
Skittles: We're not co-hosts are we Sirius? ::looks helplessly are the Mightyena next to her to help but he only licks his teeth and pants.::
Sirius: I dunno . . . Are we Skittles?
Muddy: Yes you are! You don't have a story named after ya know do you?
Skittles: Shut up, we're working on it!
Sirius: Yeah, its going to be called "Sirius & Skittles!" BAM! In your face Mud boy!
Skittles: Damn straight!
::Flare, who is lazily staring at the golden lights from up above, snaps her head back down and decided to change the subject.::
Flare: Whatever guys . . . Moving onto the next topic on our list-
Skittles: Hey! We're not done here!
Flare: Well, this is my and Muddy's show, so get your faces out of it!
Muddy: BAM!
Flare: Now, as I was trying to say before I was rudely interrupted-
Muddy: Geez, I know! That cat and dog can be so retarded and impolite sometimes I can't believe it! They talk so much! Yada, yada yada, I mean c'mon! We don't wanna hear you, so Shut. Up.
Flare: I believe someone should take their own advice.
Muddy: Me? Nah. It couldn't be . . . could it?
Flare: Whatever. Moving on AGAIN, what's the deal with Pokémon Centers? Why are all the nurses the same? There not all like that are they?
Muddy: Maybe they got plastic surgery. And I don't believe that they're ALL the same! Brock, the guy on that retarded show, Pokémon-
Flare: Hello Muddy? You're a Pokémon too remember?
Muddy: Yeah, and proud of it, but what does it have to do with that dumb Pokémon show?
Flare: ::sighs:: Never mind.
Muddy: As I was saying, Brock knew that one Nurse Joy's bangs were like a millimeter or something longer than the others! So in your face Flare!
Flare: Oh dear, it hurts. Ow. Stop the hate.
Muddy: Just because you have a nut in your butt, doesn't mean it has to affect the strain in your brain!
Flare: I believe its already too late for you already.
Muddy: Is not! The strain in my brain never hurts!
Flare: That's because you have no brain Mud boy.
Muddy: I do too!
Flare: Yeah right. If there was a stupid city, you'd be the leader of them.
Muddy: You want stupid! I'll show you stupid!
::Muddy quickly jumps out of his seat and puts his fists up. He starts to shift his weight back and forth between his feet and takes a swing at the air, missing his invisble target and hitting himself in the face instead. He coils and falls to the ground, clutching his eye.::
Muddy: MY EYE! It's on fire!
Flare: ::watches Muddy climb back into his seat, amused.:: Somehow, I'm pretty sure you can too.
Muddy: Haha, I can, can't I?
Flare: Well I ran out of things to say considering I was just hired for this dumb talk host job thing.
Muddy: We're being talk show hosts now! I thought we were being ourselves.
Flare: Yeah we are. we're just talking about it in a story.
Muddy: Oh no! I got my character all wrong! Oh no, oh no!
Flare: Oogle flooga!
Muddy: What? Oh, who are you guys! I'm Latios! Rawr!
Flare: I just love the simple minded. I'm Flare!
Muddy: And I'm-
Flare: Stupid, inconsiderate, moronic, a jerk, retarded-
Muddy: Wow, I'm all those things! I thought I was Muddy!
Flare: Please pray for me.
::The lights dim and the four Pokémon get up out of their seats and toward the doors, opening them and letting them close behind them with a satisfying slam.::
------------------------------------
Flare: That's not script format, you-
Sh! ^^; LaTeR dAyZ!
Last edited: