My first comic ever!!!*yayz^^*

[▼■DoomWing■▼]

Brendan's Bad Luck

Well, its my first comic so please go easy on me.Its called:




Brendan's Bad Luck.​

So far i only have this much.

Intro

Comic 1
Comic 2
Comic 3


Hope you will like it!!!!!​

 

[shinz]

Cool but try to do who's speaking first on the left.

 

[Socrates With A Lobotomy]

The sentences are a bit run on, and the title should be "Brendan's Bad Luck" Not "Brendan's Bad Lucks" Also, I'm having trouble telling who's speaking.

 

[/Exiled/]

its a decent comic. The humor is entertaining and the chat bubbles and sprites are good. Theres nothing really bad with it. But its not really that great. But it is entertaining and is one of the few first timer's comics with great potential.

All together score 7/10

first timer's score 9.5/10

 

[Neopolis]

I think the humor is... sub-par. Yeah, people getting hit by trucks is not that funny, especially when they come out of nowhere.

But the graphics and stuff are OK. Try working on the order of speaking though.

 

[Pokefan26]

Humor: Not so funny. Getting hit by a truck or boat really isn't funny at all.

Yeah, the other things are fine. Work on speech bubbles.

 

[Capt.Miko]

The first page feels incomplete. Brendan didn't protest or yell at his mom at all about breakfast, which just seems odd. And ran-over-by-a-truck Brendan moving in another panel also seems really odd, but besides those things, your comic is pretty good and has potential.

 

[Hikari Tenshi]

In the first comic (Not intro), it looks like the 2nd comic characters are saying, "Mom: Liver and Onions. Brendan: What's for breakfast? (in that order)" Needs work on humor like everyone is saying. Try harder and it could get better!

 

[▼■DoomWing■▼]

ok thanks for all of your help ill try and edit the comic a bit more

 

[▼■DoomWing■▼]

Well,i edited the whole intro and edited the comic with colours so you can understand who's talking.

Intro

1and 2

The first page feels incomplete. Brendan didn't protest or yell at his mom at all about breakfast, which just seems odd.

Its because he's been eating the same thing for centuries and you can tell that from the look on his face.

 

[Pokefan26]

The Intro is much more better now.

You're getting better at it.

 

[▼■DoomWing■▼]

thanks and now im working on the 3rd one

Here's num.3

Comic 3

hope ya'll will like it.

 

[Controller of Flames]

When I read your latest comic I felt like I was playing connect the dots -_-

 

[▼■DoomWing■▼]

Why?Why do you say that?

 

[PidgeotXD]

your comic is kinda funny! ill look forward to later ones.

 

[Neopolis]

Why?Why do you say that?

Because he had to find the one first, then the two, then three, just like in connect the dots.

 

[▼■DoomWing■▼]

oh ok and ill work on the next one soon.