Oaken Falls [PG-13]

[Ryano Ra]

I wish I had Chesh's lengthy chapter skills, too. Once I get past ten pages, it takes me forever to finish the chapter. xDD

As for the Arciadra thing, I read the chapter over, and I now have a completely new idea about it in my mind, one that doesn't center around Darkrai. ^.^ And I absolutely feel I am on the right path (YAY!). And yeah, some Pokemon are not going to be liked by the writer (I gave a character in my fanfiction a Croagunk, and I do not like those things whatsoever in the slightest way, shape, AND form) but we appreciate them through writing. That guy's comment was bizzare.

@_@;; Okay, lemme fly to the moon atop my Salamence now. ^^

 

[Dream Breaker]

Your fic has pulled me out of my fan-fiction lurker shell and motivated me to actually post something (albeit small; I don't like to write more than I have to.) I was reading through this on a whim and found myself completely immersed in this story and the plot that you have going. I haven't been writing much, but after getting sucked into this I'm feeling a longing to start something of my own creation. I'm at a lost for words.

D:

It's too late for me to actually review on the last chapters, but like everyone before me has said, they're wonderful and spellbinding and great and...just awesome xd.

Bottom line: I'll be following this. =P Thanks for indirectly motivating me.

 

[CHeSHiRe-CaT]

I wish I had Chesh's lengthy chapter skills, too. Once I get past ten pages, it takes me forever to finish the chapter. xDD

As for the Arciadra thing, I read the chapter over, and I now have a completely new idea about it in my mind, one that doesn't center around Darkrai. ^.^ And I absolutely feel I am on the right path (YAY!). And yeah, some Pokemon are not going to be liked by the writer (I gave a character in my fanfiction a Croagunk, and I do not like those things whatsoever in the slightest way, shape, AND form) but we appreciate them through writing. That guy's comment was bizzare.

@_@;; Okay, lemme fly to the moon atop my Salamence now. ^^

Thanks for supporting me, Ra. xP And yeah, it still takes me to forever to write more than ten pages, but once I have some sort of awesome result I'm shooting for, that's motivation enough.

Omfg, lemme fly on your Salamence. D: I'll give you a raisin oatmeal cookie. It's gigantic, by the way, since I suck at pouring dough on cookie sheets. xD

Your fic has pulled me out of my fan-fiction lurker shell and motivated me to actually post something (albeit small; I don't like to write more than I have to.) I was reading through this on a whim and found myself completely immersed in this story and the plot that you have going. I haven't been writing much, but after getting sucked into this I'm feeling a longing to start something of my own creation. I'm at a lost for words.

D:

It's too late for me to actually review on the last chapters, but like everyone before me has said, they're wonderful and spellbinding and great and...just awesome xd.

Bottom line: I'll be following this. =P Thanks for indirectly motivating me.

Don't worry about small reviews. xD I know exactly what you mean. I hate to repeat what everyone's already said about certain fics, so I just sum up my favorite bits and then praise them with some humble words and vanish. XP

I'm really touched that my story could help you come out of your shell, honestly. 8D I look forward to seeing you in this thread in the future, or heck, even the stuff you put out here in the FF section. I can already see from your well-rounded post that you're probably a master storyteller. ^_^

 

[Ryano Ra]

Well it seems as though your motivation leads you to having fantastic chapter lengths. XD My dream is to break the post count and have at least one chapter be two posts. But as for Cynthia's lineup (if you are following her line-up according to the anime) I wonder how her Gastrodon and Spiritomb will be. XDDD

And yes, fly with me atop my Salamence! Take to the skies! *shares oatmeal cookie with his Glameow.* ^^

 

[katiekitten]

...And I can't believe I've never read this until now.

Bloomin' heck, Chesh! I absolutely adored this. In a I'm-very-happy-to-stay-up-all-night-reading-this way 'cause it's just that good. *hugs and gives cookie* The plot is wonderfully exciting, (I found myself wanting to shout: 'Get out of there, you crazy peoples!' at the screen all through the last chapter. :x) I love the characters - Alex's relationship with his mother was extremely well done, as was Annie and his reunion, and who can't adore Annie? *hugs her* - and don't even get me started on the whole apocalypse.

Pure and utter love, that's all I can say. : D

I can't wait for the next chapter now. xD Put me on the PM list, hun?

And thanks again for the most enjoyable read I've had in a while. *piles over with cookies* This review cannot say it enough.

 

[CHeSHiRe-CaT]

...And I can't believe I've never read this until now.

Bloomin' heck, Chesh! I absolutely adored this. In a I'm-very-happy-to-stay-up-all-night-reading-this way 'cause it's just that good. *hugs and gives cookie* The plot is wonderfully exciting, (I found myself wanting to shout: 'Get out of there, you crazy peoples!' at the screen all through the last chapter. :x) I love the characters - Alex's relationship with his mother was extremely well done, as was Annie and his reunion, and who can't adore Annie? *hugs her* - and don't even get me started on the whole apocalypse.

Pure and utter love, that's all I can say. : D

I can't wait for the next chapter now. xD Put me on the PM list, hun?

And thanks again for the most enjoyable read I've had in a while. *piles over with cookies* This review cannot say it enough.

Aw, that's very kind of you to stop by, KK. ;___; Haven't seen you around in aaaages (well, other than in your one-shot that I commented on xD). Kudos for being able to get through 86 pages of this psychotic drama in one night. o__o And thank you for all the wonderful comments...and cookies. xD

I really need to go back and read the first three chapters. I've almost forgotten Janice Gregory completely. D: See, I've been brainstorming on MSN with Timid Kyogre about the ending because it's getting really complicated. Before I get ahead of myself, I should focus back onto the current events. xD

I just got a MacBook Pro, but it doesn't have Microsoft Office on it, so I'm either using its TextEdit software (which contains spelling/grammar check, so no worries there) or Microsoft Word on my old laptop to write the story. Unfortunately, I may also have to purchase a new version of Adobe Photoshop to make banners, etc. on the MacBook. :/

Chapter V hasn't been started yet, but I promise I'll get cracking on it when my head isn't pounding from running on a treadmill for two hours. xD The last two spoilers from that post on the previous page will come true, so don't worry, kiddies. The plot will also thicken up a bit. O: Le gasp.

 

[Sike Saner]

Damn. o_o Alex punching Annie in the face and then jumping out of a moving vehicle--that was a powerful moment. And while I want to make it clear that I'm not saying that what he did was the rational or smart or right thing for him to do, I am saying that I feel that it was an understandable reaction. After all, people don't always behave rationally or glamourously under severe grief or horror--I commend you for actually portraying a character that doesn't just magically calm down at once just because he's told to, especially since I know that not everyone would have the guts to portray such. ^^

Oh, and here's a lovely image:

Giratina gave a terrible screech as it munched on the corpses scattered about the massacre it had wrought, scarlet fluid and quivering intestines dripping from its sharp, black beak.

Mmm, tasty. X3

Things got damned intense when they missed that exit. o_o Especially when the road collapsed underneath them--God, that would be frelling scary to experience. o___o;

There was this great, creepy sort of pseudo-tranquility hanging over the early parts of the scene involving Alex and the artist formerly known as Arciadra (I love the name "Arciadra", by the way ^^), the parts before it shared its memory with Alex, especially at the very beginning of that scene. Cool stuff. ^^

I'm not going to say a word about who and what Arciadra may or may not be just yet, though. X3 Knowing what you've said about it, and knowing how my own mind works (or doesn't XP), it's clear to me that this is not a matter about which I need even attempt to make any guesses (especially not in public X3) without due thought and time. At any rate, Arciadra (or anything else I should perhaps be calling it) is definitely a damned fascinating character, I'd say. o.o

In other news, it seems that Arceus is an arsehole in this. X3[/jokeIjustcouldn'tresistmaking]

Speaking of legendaries:

<I am in all things obedient to your wishes, Master Arceus,> Giratina croons in a high, chilling voice, clicking its beak and spreading its vile wings before Arciadra.

That does sound like it'd be a creepy voice. o_o;

And that old lady and her Golduck were awesome. XD I loved what the Golduck wore on its head, and I loved how the old woman talked. I do have a theory about who she is *long glance at her Golduck*, but I think I'll keep quiet about that one, as well. X3

Oh, and cool Nurse Joy, by the way.

 

[CHeSHiRe-CaT]

Damn. o_o Alex punching Annie in the face and then jumping out of a moving vehicle--that was a powerful moment. And while I want to make it clear that I'm not saying that what he did was the rational or smart or right thing for him to do, I am saying that I feel that it was an understandable reaction. After all, people don't always behave rationally or glamourously under severe grief or horror--I commend you for actually portraying a character that doesn't just magically calm down at once just because he's told to, especially since I know that not everyone would have the guts to portray such. ^^

Oh, and here's a lovely image:



Mmm, tasty. X3

Things got damned intense when they missed that exit. o_o Especially when the road collapsed underneath them--God, that would be frelling scary to experience. o___o;

There was this great, creepy sort of pseudo-tranquility hanging over the early parts of the scene involving Alex and the artist formerly known as Arciadra (I love the name "Arciadra", by the way ^^), the parts before it shared its memory with Alex, especially at the very beginning of that scene. Cool stuff. ^^

I'm not going to say a word about who and what Arciadra may or may not be just yet, though. X3 Knowing what you've said about it, and knowing how my own mind works (or doesn't XP), it's clear to me that this is not a matter about which I need even attempt to make any guesses (especially not in public X3) without due thought and time. At any rate, Arciadra (or anything else I should perhaps be calling it) is definitely a damned fascinating character, I'd say. o.o

In other news, it seems that Arceus is an arsehole in this. X3[/jokeIjustcouldn'tresistmaking]

Speaking of legendaries:



That does sound like it'd be a creepy voice. o_o;

And that old lady and her Golduck were awesome. XD I loved what the Golduck wore on its head, and I loved how the old woman talked. I do have a theory about who she is *long glance at her Golduck*, but I think I'll keep quiet about that one, as well. X3

Oh, and cool Nurse Joy, by the way.

Alex jumping out of the car was a last-minute edit by yours truly. XD See, it was my original intent that they would go to Pewter City, but then a glaring error emerged: why the hell would they go to Pewter City if the rest of Kanto is going to be obliterated before Johto? I didn't want to make it easy for them to escape, so I tossed in elements such as Alex jumping out of the car, and Giratina coming up on their tail to destroy the freeway.

And when Annie was groping him like that, trying to restrain him, I couldn't help but think, "What would I do in Alex's situation?"

Of course! Punch Annie in the face! Desperate times call for desperate measures. xD

And the Giratina scene you highlighted was possibly my favorite passage from Chapter IV. I took great care in carving this lovely image into your heads: Giratina + human carnage = OHM NOM NOM.

Arciadra...haha. XD I'm not going there, either.

I'm glad you've already started speculating who the woman with the Golduck is. I promise you'll know her identity in the next chapter. Don't slap yourself in the head too much when it's revealed, though: a lot of hardship has shaped her and transformed her (along with her...Golduck).

You will also be seeing more of this Nurse Joy I introduced. Heck, you'll even learn her last name, and boy, won't you be surprised. :3 Because don't forget: there is one other familiar character (other than the old woman) who is making an appearance in Chapter V.

Thank you for sacrificing a moment of your precious time to review, Miss Saner. Your words are always appreciated. *bows* ^^





Kay, I ordered Microsoft Office '08 for my Mac on Monday to arrive the next day (today), so I'll be sitting at home, waiting for UPS to bring my package. Soon, I'll be able to continue writing Oaken Falls (and do school assignments) from the comfort of my beeeaaautiful MacBook. <3 (It's Timid Kyogre's fault I even decided to get one.)

I also ordered Final Draft 7 for my Mac, which is the software I've been using to write my screenplays. After talking about my magnum opus (which is a tetralogy of screenplays) with a friend last night, I was inspired to continue working on the revision of the first script I've written. However, that's another story. :3

If any of you have any more questions or comments, feel free to ask/tell/discuss. O:

 

[storymasterb]

I think I know who she is. The old lady I mean.

Spoiler: Who I think the old lady is

Misty. It makes sense becuase she has a Psyduck. There is the collosal hole that she'd probably be in Cerulean though. It is a good guess, maybe the right one

No idea about Arciadra. I really need some time to think about that. Sorry about the Garchomp thing, I misunderstood.

 

[Smunkie]

Well, I'm too lazy to review every chapter that I missed, seeing as I came in on chapter 4 and a lot of stuff has been going on, but suffice to say that I really enjoyed it. The escape scene was really intense and well done. The whole legendary backstory is interesting and seems to have a lot of potential. Your characters are enjoyable to read about. And I do love the image of OHM NOM NOM xD
Since Arciadra is a sort-of anagram of Darkraii (plus all of the other hints I've caught in the story) they must have SOMETHING to do with each other, but....I'm not gonna say anything else about that!
And I agree with storymasterb's guess about the identity of the old lady. Seems plausible to me.
All in all I'm really looking forward to the next chapter, and the revealing of the Pokemon in the Pokeballs. Keep up the good work!

Oh, and have fun with your Macbook! I was thinking about getting one too, but they're just so expensive D:

 

[Ryano Ra]

That's great you are going to continue writing Oaken Falls on your MacBook. I desperately want one after seeing it at my local Best Buy, and I just fell in love. <33 They are a bit on the expensive side, but nothing a job at Petco can't help you get within a small sum of months. xD I think I need a laptop; I could make a lot of more progress on Rifts of Seasons because this is the main computer in our home.

So I must fight for it on a daily basis. xP

 

[CHeSHiRe-CaT]

I think I know who she is. The old lady I mean.

Spoiler: Who I think the old lady is

Misty. It makes sense becuase she has a Psyduck. There is the collosal hole that she'd probably be in Cerulean though. It is a good guess, maybe the right one

No idea about Arciadra. I really need some time to think about that. Sorry about the Garchomp thing, I misunderstood.

I'm glad we're cleared up on the Garchomp thing. xD No offense at all, storymasterb.

And your guess is a plausible one. But why would this person be away from the city you mentioned? What's up with the mask, or the voice?

Well, I'm too lazy to review every chapter that I missed, seeing as I came in on chapter 4 and a lot of stuff has been going on, but suffice to say that I really enjoyed it. The escape scene was really intense and well done. The whole legendary backstory is interesting and seems to have a lot of potential. Your characters are enjoyable to read about. And I do love the image of OHM NOM NOM xD
Since Arciadra is a sort-of anagram of Darkraii (plus all of the other hints I've caught in the story) they must have SOMETHING to do with each other, but....I'm not gonna say anything else about that!
And I agree with storymasterb's guess about the identity of the old lady. Seems plausible to me.
All in all I'm really looking forward to the next chapter, and the revealing of the Pokemon in the Pokeballs. Keep up the good work!

Oh, and have fun with your Macbook! I was thinking about getting one too, but they're just so expensive D:

Understandable to just review the latest chapter. XP I probably would have done the same, if I was in your position.

Well, it seems someone caught on to the anagram. 8)

Maybe I do know about this "Darkrai" after all. But what about Darkrai's relationship with Arciadra?

I'm afraid you won't find until a few more chapters have gone by. And yes, the MacBook is freaking expensive, but it was a birthday gift. But I probably won't get anything for Christmas. XD




All in all, some brilliant deductions we have here. =) Still, I'm surprised no one else spotted them earlier. Tsk-tsk, readers.

That's great you are going to continue writing Oaken Falls on your MacBook. I desperately want one after seeing it at my local Best Buy, and I just fell in love. <33 They are a bit on the expensive side, but nothing a job at Petco can't help you get within a small sum of months. xD I think I need a laptop; I could make a lot of more progress on Rifts of Seasons because this is the main computer in our home.

So I must fight for it on a daily basis. xP

I had to work a few months at Albertson's to get my digital camera. @___@ Sucks bad. And yeah, I couldn't stand working on a PC that everyone shared. I had to get something of my owwwwn.

 

[Ryano Ra]

I had to work a few months at Albertson's to get my digital camera. @___@ Sucks bad. And yeah, I couldn't stand working on a PC that everyone shared. I had to get something of my owwwwn.

Yeah, I know the feeling. I need something of my own. xD

My sister has her own Dell laptop (but she's 22, a college student, and has been working at RadioShack for a little over a year now...she was destined to have one. xD) I want to spend my summer slaving in Petco (if I get called back for an interview, i applied to three different ones. xD) so I can buy a few things that I need (My 4GB Zune! I had one, but unfortunately, there was a rush of buglary at my school, and my Zune was the third victim. ;.; I miss my music) and try to save up for a laptop.

But enough of that! Exactly how's the progress of Chapter V coming along? I know I'm over here, struggling to finish this battle in my eighth chapter. XD

 

[CHeSHiRe-CaT]

Yeah, I know the feeling. I need something of my own. xD

My sister has her own Dell laptop (but she's 22, a college student, and has been working at RadioShack for a little over a year now...she was destined to have one. xD) I want to spend my summer slaving in Petco (if I get called back for an interview, i applied to three different ones. xD) so I can buy a few things that I need (My 4GB Zune! I had one, but unfortunately, there was a rush of buglary at my school, and my Zune was the third victim. ;.; I miss my music) and try to save up for a laptop.

But enough of that! Exactly how's the progress of Chapter V coming along? I know I'm over here, struggling to finish this battle in my eighth chapter. XD

I'm still waiting for my package to arrive. xP So Chapter V still hasn't begun yet, but it should start today. Also, I don't want this to become a thread about computers and electronics, so I think we should save that conversation for a different time and place. xp



EDIT: I have begun work on Chapter V, and I'm currently on page 10. Let me tell you: it's going to be a rough and tumble time with this next segment. XD Lots of stuff going on that I have to pay attention to, including timing between dialogue, getting the emotions right, and bringing plot elements together accurately. @__@

 

[Enigma]

So, I've got a couple theories, one involving lobsters. But that one is way too complicated, so I'll just mention the other:

Spoiler: Theory and questions

Where is cresselia in all of this? It makes me wonder, because Alex's last encounter seemed more like a dream than a nightmare. Is something impersonating darkrai? And is mew involved? Where was mew banished to? Are all the other legendaries on arceus' side? I just can't picture jirachi attacking people. And this is pretty minor, but "arciadra" is almost an anagram of "darkrai". Was that just your method of coming up with the name, is it a complete coincidence, or do we have a "I am Lord Voldemort/Tom Marvolo Riddle" thing here that actually has something to do with the story?

...So many questions...

 

[pokeaidmissy]

You finally released the next chapter! *dances to random Latin music*-- Ok, just a few questions--Who is the weird 'wild woman' and her Golduck? (I think I know who she is, though...) Is Mew going to play a major role in this? (please don't kill her!) Is Annie really going to take the Pokemon? (Personal opinion, yes, with dire consequences) Is there going to be any more appearances from the characters we know? (ex.-Ash, Pikachu, Misty, Brock, May, Dawn, Tracey, etc.?) Will there ever be anymore Trainers? (Hopefully someday...) I'm sorry for all the questions, but my ADD brain just has to know!!! Get the next chapter up soon! =] =]

 

[pokeaidmissy]

You finally released the next chapter! *dances to random Latin music*-- Ok, just a few questions--Who is the weird 'wild woman' and her Golduck? (I think I know who she is, though...) Is Mew going to play a major role in this? (please don't kill her!) Is Annie really going to take the Pokemon? (Personal opinion, yes, with dire consequences) Is there going to be any more appearances from the characters we know? (ex.-Ash, Pikachu, Misty, Brock, May, Dawn, Tracey, etc.?) Will there ever be anymore Trainers? (Hopefully someday...) I'm sorry for all the questions, but my ADD brain just has to know!!! Get the next chapter up soon! =] =]

 

[Azurne]

Saved by a hobo.

I have to admit, that was pretty darned sweet. xD Alex's emotions are right on the dot too -exactly how you'd think a kid would behave after seeing his mom blown to bits. Heck, I was sitting at my screen here, "Dammit, turn around and go get her!" xxPP

I also love how you've characterized Cynthia. She is amazing.



I loves your story, x10000000. 8D

//crappy review.

 

[storymasterb]

I finally got it! The relationship between Arciadra and Darkrai that is. The Monster is Darkrai, so Arciadra created Darkrai. Arciadra created Darkrai by accident becuase his imprisonment drove him crazy and it created Darkrai, which explains why the Monster constantly tormented Alex in his dreams. They look the same becuase Darkrai was unconciously modelled by Arciadra to look like him I suppose.

 

[Irith_Locke]

Wow. This is an amazing story. I personally LOVE stories with dark tone...I mean, sure, journey fics can have villians, but not godly-world-ending-rage stuff like in this. All through chapter 3, I could just feel the suspense building; it was amazing.
Cynthia is awesome...I love Lucario, too. A Lucario driving is just plain cool.
But yeah. I really have no complaints here. I don't care about grammar/spelling (or really notice it) unless it distracts from the story, and it never did here, so I didn't notice anything.
This story has me hooked.