Epi is priceless, in my opinion.
She's already proven to be a very amusing character--and of
course she has; she is, after all, a member of the Chansey line, a line which continues to be awesomely portrayed in this.
And I loved the part in which the nurse put the sherriff in his place in a nice, profanity-laden manner. X3 That was effing classic, and I loved the way it was executed, too.
Highlights:
In the blink of an eye reality was seemingly edited, placing the psychic type on the opposite side of the fence.
That's one of my favorites out of all the descriptions of teleportations I've read over the years. I just love that choice of words, especially with regards to the "reality was seemingly edited" part. ^^
“…Wake up!...Wake up!...Wake up!”
The Gallade lifted his head. The first thing his eyes saw was a small, pink egg-shaped Pokemon hopping up and down excitedly, chanting the same two words over and over. A small nurse hat was in turn bouncing up and down on her head out of sync with her movements, periodically revealing the small tuft of pink hair tied up into a ponytail beneath.
XD A funny image, I thought.
The Happiny continued to bounce up and down for what seemed to be (to the Gallade) several agonizing eternities, her face scrunched up in thought as she debated the merits of not using a patient’s colon as a trampoline.
XD Nice one.
Now slightly more coherent and less focused on the pain in his stomach, the Gallade asked, Where am I?
“The Pokemon center!” the Happiny replied.
…Could you be more specific?
There was a long pause.
“Nope!”
XD
They couldn’t find your Pokeball so they said you had to be strapped down in case you were…Randy?...no…wrapping?
That made me laugh, especially with regards to the use of "randy". XD
It is said that only in a crucible do people reveal who they really are, empty words forgotten as their actions come to the fore. All present were about to see the makeup of the sheriff’s soul, and they were about to find out that his soul was a suitable substitute for road tar.
A nicely-worded paragraph--I especially like the bolded part.
The nurse turned back to the sheriff and began to explain that she had spent decades training and taking care of Pokemon that could as easily have ripped her in half as they could have blinked, and that she was therefore unmoved by the petty threats of a man who was too big for his britches. She furthermore explained (in a case of insight that reveals itself only when suffering the effects of sheer indignation) that if the sheriff had been halfway competent at his job hundreds of Pokemon might not have mysteriously appeared in a warehouse in an abandoned part of town known to be frequented by those of legally dubious incomes. The nurse further posited that his constituents might think less of him should anyone present reveal the sheriff’s “enlightened” views on gender and race relations, and that if he was wise he would keep such considerations in mind especially since her assistance could mean the difference between accolades for his department or an uncomfortable look into his track record during his tenure in office.
This is a summary of what the nurse said. If run through most profanity filters, the exact transcript of what she spoke to the sheriff would result in what most people would interpret as an attempt to create a new writing system using only asterisks.
I loved this part. X3 I think that implying the presence of the profanity rather than showing it outright in her exact words somehow had the effect of making it all the more clear that she was REALLY swearing up a storm there. And that second paragraph is awesome. XD
The deputies watched the procession go, in awe of the utter precision of it all and what they had just borne witness to.
“That’s one tough lady,” one deputy finally said, “I mean, holy sh—“
The nurse managed to overhear him and interrupted. “Language, please!”
Especially funny in that context. XD
The Gallade ducked a flaming roundhouse delivered by a Blaziken who had chosen him as a target of convenience. He regained his balance just as the Blaziken used the momentum of its roundhouse foot to spin into a powerful back kick. There was a sickening keening wail of psychic energy as his mentally-reinforced arm blade barely deflected the blow.
Cool. o.o I especially liked the "sickening keening wail of psychic energy" detail.
The Gallade narrowly dodged a Flamethrower that the Blaziken spewed at him, and he could feel the heat wash across his body even as the licking flames passed to the side with barely inches to spare. An enraged cry indicated that the missed attack had inadvertently found a target, and the psychic type rolled to the side just as a badly singed Nidoking stormed towards the unwitting Blaziken with murder in its eyes. The Blaziken turned towards the interloper, its battle with the Gallade apparently forgotten.
I thought that the chaos of the scene in which that happened came through well, especially in that paragraph. ^^
In truth, many Pokemon songs have no words, mainly because they need no words: words at their most powerful can merely make a man desire to strangle out the life of another man whose only crime was probably being born in the wrong place (this is hardly the accomplishment most laud it to be, mainly because most people are only a step or two away from strangling someone anyway).
X3 Nice.
In absence of being able to go with the others, Epi had decided to make herself useful and take some window cleaner and a towel to the center’s doors. Clean doors presented a welcoming image to road-worn and dusty trainers, she had been told. What she had not been told, however, is that she needed a stepladder so that trainers would feel welcome above their kneecaps.
Another choice of words that I liked...
Had it occurred to her to think of this, however, she would have likely and in admirable Chansey fashion declared it an unnecessary detail, arguing that the thought counted most. Chansey optimism was, in other words, the kind of mindset that allowed a man to fiddle while Rome burned around him and at the same time think that whatever was cooking smelled awfully good.
...And another (I frelling loved that XD)...
Soon enough she became engrossed in her scrubbing, lost to the world.
The world found her with a vengeance as she felt the sensation of the door giving way followed by the uncomfortable sensation of shoe leather meeting face.
...And another. XD
The blonde hair girl turned towards the voice and looked in horror at the vague imprint of the underside of her shoe on the Happiny’s front. “Oh no! Are you okay?”
Epi rubbed her front, and felt nothing that wouldn’t heal. “Uh huh. Sorry for being in the way.” Most Chansey would apologize to an assassin for being in the way of their bullet.
Chansey know the definition of “lie.” They believe it means to be horizontal on the ground.
Both of those are great examples of why I love your portrayal of the Chansey line. XD
As an aside, the sheriff’s tirade against the nurse happened to be caught by a patrol cruiser’s dashboard camera. As is typical in the internet age, the video of said encountered soon enough found its way online, where it unsurprisingly became a major fiasco for the town’s sheriff’s department. As is typical the sheriff—family at his side—issued a tearful apology at a press conference, explaining that he was, in fact, deeply sorry for all the things he said (and that they were “a tragic error in judgment that have hurt many people”) and that he truly, in his heart of hearts, loved all colors, creeds, and religions.
He resigned soon after. His replacement went on to have a successful multi-term career as sheriff of the force until he was caught soliciting sex from underage boys.
In American politics, this is known as “progress.”
...Wow. XD;
It had eventually occurred to Epi that the Chansey who would most likely know where the Gardevoir and her trainer had gone would probably the Chansey that was assigned to watch the lobby of the Pokemon center. This sounds like an impressive deduction when one considers that said Chansey would be witness to nearly every person or Pokemon that entered or left the building. It becomes considerably less impressive when one realizes that Epi only came to this conclusion when she had run out of other Chansey to ask.
XD
In his short time in their care the Gallade had learned to be wary of the one-penny-on-the-tracks-away-from-a-derailment Chansey train of thought
XD I loved that.
The very idea that he would have to be disrespectful to a female rankled him, but the Gallade realized he had no other choice. Forgive me, but I am leaving. He turned back towards the door and began walking.
The Chansey let out a shrill high note, causing the Gallade to momentarily stop in his tracks, and he felt a growing sense of apprehension as he heard doors fly open and distinctive footfalls pass through them. When he finally turned around he found himself facing down a veritable battalion of Chansey that had seemingly materialized out of thin air. What was even more disconcerting is that their normally jovial facial expressions had given way to nearly identical glares of stony determination.
Wow... o.o Awesomely creepy Chansey there. XD That was a great moment.
The room quickly found itself filled with the chattering of confused Chansey, their metaphorically well-oiled machine thrown into metaphorical chaos by the metaphorical spanner in the metaphorical works.
XD Loved the repetition of "metaphorical" there.
“Stop! In the name of love!”
“Otherwise we’ll be very cross with you!”
“No dessert either!”
“And you can forget about movie night!”
“Wait! Isn’t that too harsh?”
“…okay, you can have movie night. But no dessert, we mean it!”
“Yeah!” the Chansey said in unison.
Those Chansey are just effing priceless, I swear. XD And I couldn't help but be particularly amused by the use of, "Stop! In the name of love!" X3
The Gallade turned the corner at the nearest intersection, narrowly teleporting to avoid a car whose driver had not been paying much attention while making a right turn. Had the Gallade been paying attention to the vehicle afterwards he would have watched as the driver stopped in the middle of his offensive gesture, mouth agape as Chansey flowed around and, in some cases, over his vehicle.
o.o That's certainly a memorable image.
The chivalrous part of him wanted to do little more than crawl in the deepest hole it could find and die of embarrassment at the fact he—a proud warrior and gentleman--was running from a group of Pokemon who thought “slaughter” was the misspelled plural of “laughter.”
Again, I love the way Chansey are portrayed in this. XD
It was soon followed by a cacophonous wave of pink flesh.
XD Awesome way of putting it.
Yep, I continue to enjoy the frell out of this story.
