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Poké Punch-Out!! (Rated PG)


Whatcha want?
Good chappie. You are getting way better with your description. If Chan gets to Tyran, what will he do then if he beats him? Walk into the sunset( or trying to get his bike back from Throh?) Keep writing!



Catcher of Ubers
Can you put me on the PM list please?

Nice to see Hitmonchan taking care of business against Emboar. Though I must say it was nice to see the opponent's point of view for most of this chapter and not as much from Hitmonchan's point of view. Not that I don't like Hitmonchan, but it was a nice change.

“Yay!” Emboar and Emolga both cheered, having similar personalities.

Oh my gosh you have no idea how hilarious that picture in my mind was of that scene of seeing a gigantic Emboar and a tiny Emolga yelling "Yay!" together.

And Lilligant and Throh talking about how they have no life was pretty funny too. Keep it up!


Back in Blue
Chapter 47: Great Alakazam’s War Cloning Revenge

Two weeks earlier…

“Ohmm……….” For some questionable reason, Kadabra was meditating in an outlet mall. Thousands of Pokémon passed him every hour, wondering what the heck he was doing.

At about 2:50 p.m., a Marill and Umbreon passed the meditating Psychic type. The Marill, who was eating some delectable strawberry yogurt, walked back towards the Kadabra and started to poke him. “Hey mommy?” The Marill child dragged his mother to get her attention. “What’s that guy with the mustache doing? And why is he holding a piece of string?”

“He’s probably using one of those fake evolution tricks on the internet.” The mother, Umbreon, explained. “They usually talk about bonding with Link Cables for a long time evolves Pokémon like him. Or maybe he’s sleeping. One or the other.”

“Really? Cool! Can I evolve like that?”

“No Marill. You evolve naturally.”

“Aw… But I want to evolve again! All my friends have already evolved to their final form!”

“Caterpie and Kricketot?”


“What about Lickitung? Or Gligar? Tangela? How about Glameow?”

“…Ok, not all of my friends have evolved… But most of them have!”

“Ohmmm……… O…..OOO…….” Kadabra, with his eyes closed, sluggishly began to stand up, and began to wildly swing his arms in the air.

“Hey mommy, what is he doing now?”

“I think he’s breakdancing. He doesn’t seem to be the best at it.”

“Ohmmm… Ooga ooga ooga… Ohma ohma ohma… Ciao…ciao…CIAO… Ohmedy ohmedy ohmedy…”

Marill, who was oddly interested in the Psychic type, began bouncing up and down. “What’s he saying mom? What’s he saying?”

“Oh my… He may be saying one of those evil backwards messages. Marill, I think we should go report to the…”

“OHMENAKA!” Kadabra screeched as his eyes fluttered open, and he engrossed himself in a white light. His limbs began to strengthen, stretching his body more outward. His skull began to change shape, making his head and brain bigger. His body marks also began to fade away. After a quick, yet detailed process, Kadabra had evolved into Alakazam. He looked down at his new body, and began to grin. “YES! It worked! All of those days of meditation worked!”

“Woah!” The Marill jumped up, almost dropping his yogurt cup.

“How did… that defies scientific understanding…”

“The internet was right once again!” Alakazam declared. “Just like when I made those thank you cards!”

“But wow… I didn’t know Kadabra evolved into this.” Marill closely observed Alakazam. “I thought it would evolve into something with a helmet or something. What happened to your tail? And what’s the deal with your mustache?”

“Evolution does things like that. I’ll get used to it eventually.”

“So, Alakazam…” Umbreon began. “How did you exactly evolve?”

“Ancient Psychic-Type Secret. It involves meditating, a link cable, wheat, and eight pounds of taleggio cheese.” Alakazam held out heavy sack bag, full of wheat and cheese.

“Why taleggio cheese? Why not fontina?”

“If I told you, it wouldn’t be a secret anymore.”

“Ok… But why did you decide to meditate in an outlet mall?”

“Because the internet said so.” The newly evolved monster looked at his right hand, and saw his psychic spoon. Then he encountered a problem. “…Hey! I thought my species is supposed to have two spoons…” Alakazam then saw the Marill eating his yogurt with a spoon that looked nearly identical to his. “Oh hey can I take this? Thanks!” The Alakazam swiped the matching spoon to go with the one he had as a Kadabra, and Teleported outside the outlet mall.

“Alakazam are mean.”

“They definitely were, hon. Back in my red and blue days as an Eevee, they were assumed to be magical and invincible beings. Nowadays they’ve lost their invincibility, but they’re still pretty cheap.”


“…and that’s why friendship is said to be the most powerful source of magic in the world. At least according to television.” Lilligant finished explaining.

“Wow.” Throh yawned. “If Lilligant was able to tell us all of that, and the other guy still isn’t here, I’m guessing that he’s dead…”

“Seriously…Where’s Kadabra?”

“Alakazam.” Raichu corrected, who was leaning on the side of the ring, almost about to fall asleep.

Suddenly, a whirl of dust began to swirl in the middle of the arena, as if a miniature tornado was brewing. Some were amazed, some expected as much. Alakazam teleported directly into the arena.


“What took you so long?!”

“Oh, I made you wait just to make you suffer.” The Psychic type was fiddling with his twin spoons. “I was watching the whole thing from above.”

“I hate you right now.” Throh said. “You made me waste half of my chocolate bars! Now I’ve only got fifteen left!”

“After evolution, I have obtained an IQ of over 5,000. Sadly I cannot obtain an IQ of over 9,000- for that would be utterly ridiculous and unreal.”

“Did it boost your ego, too?”

“I don’t know, Channy boy. Though it did make me question life a bit more. Every second I feel like information is bursting into my scalp. When life turns you into a hairy monster, do you moan about it, or use it as extra chubby strength? It is a metaphor for unnatural evolution… This then brings a hypothesis of empty bottles. Are they used as a source of boredom, or recycle them to hold the souls of savory goodness?”

“Ergo, this relates to fire- can fire be contained in empty bottles? Truly, that is a jug of a question… Hitmonchan, have you ever considered the geometry of a natural emerald? It’s like comparing fire with bottles… A complete headache. It’s just like emus and ponies. Why do they not exist in a perfect and invincible cluster? Insects have been able to do it just find. Perhaps if...“

“Ok! Ok! I get it, you’re beyond a genius! Can you stop having multiple personalities and fight already?!”

“I suppose we shouldn’t keep the spectators waiting. En garde!” Alakazam threw both of his spoons in the air and caught them without even trying.

***ROUND 1***

“Psychic!” Alakazam blatantly told Hitmonchan what he was going to do once again, and blasted the attack at his enemy. This time, Hitmonchan dodged the psychic wave attack and punched the Psychic type three times in the face. He then used the attack once more, with the same outcome.

The spoon in Alakazam’s left hand flashed a bright blue as he ducked to Hitmonchan’s right and blasted a quick Psybeam. “Go!” Mystically, the spoon in Alakazam’s right hand flashed a great green as he charged up a Shadow Ball. The Fighting type escaped from the Ghost type move and countered.

“Dude, what’s wrong with your spoons?”

“Nothing, why do you ask?”

“No seriously, they’re all shiny and changing colors.”

“I don’t see it.” Alakazam used Psybeam again, but the champion wised up to this move, and gave the attacker a few hits afterwards. “It seems your mind has is positive on winning. I must delete such a feeling… with magic!” Alakazam stepped back, closed his eyes, and started meditating. His right spoon flashed, then his left spoon, and finally his right again.

The Psychic type used Psybeam, Shadow Ball, and Psybeam, but due to his spoons signifying what attack he would use, Hitmonchan easily dodged all attacks and got a Star.

“Sky Uppercut!”

“…..OH!” Alakazam oddly didn’t attempt to dodge the uppercut at all, and just took the hit like a champ. “I completely forgot that you could do that… Ah well. Psychic!”

The match went on with Hitmonchan dodging and countering the Psychic attack, then doing the same for Psybeam. The Psychic type crossed his arms, and teleported a yard away from the champ, and let out an enormous, dramatic, earth-shattering battle cry. “SAZANDAAAAAA!”

“Uh… what?”

The focused Psychic type’s eyes had a dark red shade in it, as he started conjuring a spell with his hands. “…FOCUS BLAST!” Alakazam used Double Team to split into two separate entities, and commanded them to shoot a light-blue energy orb to Hitmonchan. The Focus Blast did massive damage, enen though Hitmonchan tried to duck. “FOCUS BLAST! FOCUS BLAST!” As two more energy orbs were directed to the champ, he managed to dodge them. Alakazam finished his super-special move by using Shock Wave as he spun towards the champion.

Hitmonchan ducked under the Shock Wave Spin attack, leaving the Psychic type dizzy. “Uggg…” The champion used this opportunity to attack eight times or so before Alakazam snapped out of confusion.

“Psychic!” Hitmonchan countered the attack one more time to launch the magician into the air and back onto the ring floor. “UGGH!”


“Ugh… where am I? … Just kidding, I know where I am!” When he resumed his fighting position, both of his spoons flashed a bright light. He then blasted a powerful Energy Ball out of his spoons, directly to his opponent’s forehead, sending him to the floor.


“Geez, it seems like this always happens… Everyime I knock someone down, they come back up and knock me down!”

“You’re telling me!”


“Round over!”

“Come on! I wasn’t done yet!”


“Channy boy! I must infer you that you are such a baby. Go home and drink milk from your mommy! If you happen to have one. If you don’t, I am sorry I offended you.”

“Drink milk from my mom? That doesn’t make much sense…”

“Sorry, I’m not that good with the whole insulting trend. Ludicolo does it way better than I do.” Alakazam began to make his spoons levitate with his psychic power, while doing the wave with his arms.

“Yo Hitmonchan! You know what time it is?”

“Time for adventure?”

“No… time to put an end to Great Alakazam’s magic show! Reveal his secrets for everyone to see and put him out of the business forever!”

“I don’t know his secrets…”

“Oh… Well then, go for plan B: Punch him till’ you beat him. That usually works.”

“What if that doesn’t work?” Lilligant questioned. “Do we have a plan C?”

“Uh… No. By that point I usually lose, then fight him again.”

“I think plan C should be that we go get smoothies. I’m bone-dry thirsty…”


“Why not a chocolate smoothie?”

***ROUND 2***

“Yeah yeah, I’m the one who’s going to knock him out!” One of the three Alakazam clones (the sneaky Psychic used Double Team while Hitmonchan and his clan were talking) bragged to another.

“Are you sure? I feel strong today. Stronger than you anyway.” The second clone grinned.

“Oh yeah?!” The first clone smirked.

“Guys, guys, we have to go back to work now.” The third Alakazam pointed at his wrist, even though he didn’t have a watch. A split second later, the clones disappeared, and the real Alakazam stepped forward.

“Let’s seal this smash with a psychic showdown!” Alakazam growled in a really low voice. “SAZANDAAAAAA!!!”

“FOCUS BLAST!” The three blasts were shot from the right, the left, and then the right. Hitmonchan carefully dodged the attacks and ducked under the Psychic type’s Shock Wave. After countering, the champion found himself damaged by a super-fast Energy Ball, but dodged another one right afterwards.

“Channy boy, stand still! I want to knock your face down again!”

“Stop calling me that!”

“But it’s so fun! Psychic!” Alakazam teleported, then teleported back to use the attack. Hitmonchan dodged successfully, then dodged an incoming Shadow Ball. “Are you smart enough to memorize this?!” Alakazam’s spoon flashed blue, green, and then white. This meant that he was going to use Psybeam, Shadow Ball, and then Energy Ball. The champion swiftly dodged all of those attacks and got a Star for his efforts afterwards.


“Ow it hurts a lot!”

The match went on with the two opponents attacking back and forth, but not making much process. Throh was getting tired of this and started eating multiple chocolate bars at once to keep his eyes open.

“Yawn… This dude’s just stalling us out.”

“This is so boring to watch!” The bored Grass type hopped out of her seat and started walking to the exit. “I’m going to go grab a Lemonade from the stalls.”

“Could you be a sweetie and get me a chocolate bar, too?”

“Only if you give me cash for it!”

“Argh, I don’t remember how much they are…”

“2000 Pokédollars!”

“Ha ha ha no, I’m not stupid. The economy is terrible, but not that terrible.”

Lilligant went on with the intention of not getting candy. Along the way, she noticed one of the fighters sobbing in their seat. “Gyarados? What’s up? Why are you crying. Is the fight so boring that it’s driven you to tears?”

“No… It’s… I have no soda.”

“You’re out of soda? Did Rampardos swipe yours again?”

“No, no. It’s not like that. Ludicolo directed me to a company that studies if certain kinds of soda make you stronger. I applied for their studies, and one of the tests require me not to drink soda for a whole 24 hours!”

“That’s… not that bad.”

“You just don’t understand! I’m a dedicated world-record holder of how many sodas have been drunken in a certain time period!”

Why am I not surprised?

“My world record could be broken! There’s a lot of competitive soda drinkers out there! I’m like a Magikarp to them!”

“But you’re an evolved Magikarp!”

“Not helping. I take my world records seriously.” The enormous Water/Flying hybrid reached uner his seat and picked up a bottle of liquid with his tail. “Now if you’d excuse me, I need to finish my bottle of… ginger-ale.” After he took a few final gulps of it, he started to burst into tears again. “It just isn’t the same!”

“Yeah… I’m going to go now…”

“Round over!”


“Do I really have to say anything?” Alakazam twirled his spoon on his finger, bored with the fight and ready to go home and rest.

“No, you really don’t.”

Then I can do this!

“Fwah!” The Fighting type almost fell off of his seat as the Psychic type was talking to him through his mind. I forgot you could do that!

Get it? If I can’t say anything, I can talk to you through mind readings. Channy boy, I don’t know why you haven’t just forfeited by now. I am 93% sure that I have outlasted you in combat and that you will lose by decision. I am also 71.2% sure that it will rain tomorrow. I can do statistics in my head now! I love being evolved!

Try not to make it get to your head. It takes time to control a newly evolved form. You could do things that could threaten others…

Hey, I wonder if I could find a scheme to pick up chicks with my knowledge. Do you know any dirty jokes?

This conversation is over. Hitmonchan tried his best to stop thinking and turned around to his friends, who were boggled at why he took so long to turn around.

“Dude, were you spacing out or something?”

“Psychic mind trick.”


“Alright, son. Great Alakazam’s spoons can blink all the colors of the rainbow. You gotta figure out his tricks and show him some magic of your own.”

“I don’t have any magic…”

“That might not be true. To quote a Venomoth I knew…” Lilligant closed her eyes to think back to her high school days and remember a seemingly useful quote. “Everyone has psychic power. Pokémon just don’t realize it.”

“Really?! That’s amazing! Lemme try right now!” Throh put both of his hands on his head to try and use a Psychic type move to bring all the chocolate bars in a fifteen-yard radius to him. He then started to grunt in pain from thinking too hard. “HNNNNGGG!”

“I’m not sure if it’s true or not. She was always a flighty ditz.”

***ROUND 3***

“ZZZ…” Throh tried so hard to use psychic abilities that he forced himself to sleep.

“I wish I could sleep at will…” Lilligant looked back up at the ring, where the two fighters were slowly attacking and dodging their attacks.

Time passed, with not many exciting things happened. Right before Round 3 ended, Throh woke up.

“Huh? Gosh dang it! I must’ve used Rest! I thought I forgot that move years ago! What happened?!”

“In general, Alakazam was knocked down once, but Hitmonchan almost lost, but recovered from his third knock down. The round should end any second…”


“So… What happens next? I’ve never reached the end of three rounds before.”

“The referee chooses which fighter he thinks thought the hardest.” Throh pointed to the electric rodent stroking his chin. “In experience though, he’s always been biased against me…”

“Hmm…” Raichu continued to stroke his chin (he liked his chin), and looked at both sides of the court repeatantly. The hearts of both fighters were beating intensely. After drawing it out, he looked to the left, then turned around at the last second to turn to the right.

“Phenominal! I won! I know the perfect way to celebrate!”

“Rubbing it in?” Raichu rolled his eyes.

“Of course not! DANCE PARTY!” Alakazam used Double Team to split into a dozen copies of himself. He then pointed to the Mantine who controlled the speakers. “HIT IT, MANTINE!”

“…… PFFT!” The Mantine was laughing from both Alakazam and embarrassment and fell onto the speakers, not doing anything. Alakazam instead used his Psychic power to change the background music from fight music to a popular pop song by the famous artist Cascade Badge.

One! Two! One, two, three, four!” The clones began doing outrageously raving dance moves to the instrumental beat of the music. One clone did the monkey bars, with his partner doing the running man. One did the dying tuna, while another rocked with the funky chicken. As one Alakazam was gracefully dancing with another, some others did gymnastic flips. A couple clones did outdated dance moves from the 80s, some from the 90s, and some did a few from internet memes. A few Pokémon joined in, but only the female ones.

Throh was watching the rave from afar, resisting his temptation to step onto the dance floor. “I’ve gotta say… Alakazam has some funky fresh moves. For the few years I’ve known him, I’ve never seen that side of him before.”

“Hey Hitmonchan, do you know what we’re doing tomorrow night?”

“The same thing we do every night, Lilli,” Hitmonchan raised his fist in the air. “TRY to take over the wor-“

“That wasn’t what I meant… I meant we’re going to have a big feast, and your parents are coming over for dinner to watch the Entrainment special with us!”

“Wait what?! My parents are coming?! Here?! How’d you invite them?”

“They called us about a week ago. They flew all the way to the region to visit you!” Throh explained. “You were too busy playing video games to say anything when they called, so I told them that they could meet tomorrow night for dinner.”

“I also invited my family over for dinner as well.”

“What?! Why?”

“To tell both of them that… we’re… y’know…uh…” Lilligant couldn’t spit it out, so Throh spat it out for her.

“Goin’ steady?”

“Yeah, goin’ steady. That. Thanks Throh.”

“No prob.” Throh smiled. “And by the way… I brought my family over for dinner, too!”

“What? Why?!”

“Nah, just kidding. I just wanted to see how you would react.”


Catcher of Ubers
Another excellent chapter. I loved the mall mediation part at the beginning. That was a creative way to incorporate the link cable into the evolution process.

“Channy boy! I must infer you that you are such a baby. Go home and drink milk from your mommy! If you happen to have one. If you don’t, I am sorry I offended you.”

“Drink milk from my mom? That doesn’t make much sense…”

“Sorry, I’m not that good with the whole insulting trend. Ludicolo does it way better than I do.” Alakazam began to make his spoons levitate with his psychic power, while doing the wave with his arms.

At least he admits he sucks at insults! Lol. Speaking of Ludicolo, can't wait to see that guy again! It was nice to see a longer fight this time; fights without a knockout are rare (as they are in the Punch Out Wii game!)

“I also invited my family over for dinner as well.”

“What?! Why?”

“To tell both of them that… we’re… y’know…uh…” Lilligant couldn’t spit it out, so Throh spat it out for her.

“Goin’ steady?”

“Yeah, goin’ steady. That. Thanks Throh.”

Oh Throh, he always knows what to say! And Lilligant and Chan are cute together!


Back in Blue
I have braved the snow, holidays, finals, and multiple illnesses (still getting over one right now) in order to bring you the first new chapter of 2013!

Chapter 48: Doc Throh’s Punch-Out

Doc Throh and Lilligant were taking a trip to their local thrift store to buy ingredients to make a delicious meal for the following night.

The two were approaching the food aisle. A giant cardboard sign with the words, “Cans,” had been printed on it. Cans of all colors were lined up on all of the white shelves. Throh took a deep breath, and sighed. “Would ya look at all that stuff… Wait a second this isn’t the hardware store!”

“Of course it isn’t! You can’t buy food there!”

“But you can buy anything at the hardware store! I got matching salt and pepper shakers there once.”

“We’re not getting small stuff, Doc. We have to prepare a huge meal.”

“Why can’t we just buy a pizza like we do every other Sunday? I hate cooking!”

“Don’t you want a good reputation in front of me and Channy’s parents?”

“I don’t give a dang about a bad reputation… When you’re as old as me, reputations are mostly negative anyway.”

“Well I do!”

“Why’d we leave Hitmonchan at home anyway? He has a better taste in food than I do. Except in the chocolate department of course.”

“He needs a ton of rest after fighting Alakazam yesterday. Didn’t you see how hammered he was?”

“But he’s going to eat all of my chocolate! Don’t you know how hard I’ve worked for it?!”


“A LOT! And in this economy chocolate is becoming more and more valuable!” The two pass a sign that is giving away bags of chocolate bars for 200 Pokédollars less than usual. “Oh look a sale!” The Fighting type picked up three bags and dumped them into the basket.

“Your point?”

“I’m very protective about chocolate okay?! I bet a few generations from now chocolate will be as valuable as Big Nuggets!”

“What if a chocolate Pokémon was discovered? There’s a vanilla Pokémon, so why not a chocolate one?”

“I’m not sure that would work. Everyone would start hating on it, just like they did with Vanilluxe!”

“Good point. Oops!” Lilligant drived her cart into a Toxicroak’s cart. But not just a Toxicroak, the Toxicroak that Hitmonchan fought previously. The poisonous frog was shopping for gum and sugar powder. “Uh…”

“…” Toxicroak surveyed the other basket, grabbed his basket, then left. “Croak… Pardon me.”

“Creepy… I hate awkward moments.”

“That’s rude! He was looking at what we had!”

“Doesn’t everyone do that?” Throh justified. “I mean, he was opting for sugar powder instead of chocolate powder! What’s wrong with him?!”

After 45 minuteof browsing, choosing, and arguing, the two were in line at the checkout. While the Purugly in front of them purchasing Moo-Moo Milk, Lilligant reviewed the basket.

“So we have rice… fruit… celery…cheese… meat…corn…chocolate bags… water,” Lilligant glanced at Throh. “…chocolate cake?”

“You’re going to cook, right?”

“I thought we could all help cook.”

“Dang it!”

The two reached the the checkout Carnivine, who was watching the two babble. “Hello! How are you today?” The Carnivine greeted the two.

“Fine, thank you. We’ve just been on and off about what to buy.”

“We’re making dinner for multiple families.”

“Ah. May I suggest a turkey?”

“A tur- what now?”

“I don’t know. Someone told me turkeys taste good, but I don’t know what one is.”


As Throh and Lilligant were purchasing the groceries, at Throh’s apartment, Hitmonchan was in a rage.

“I. HATE. MY. GLOVES.” Hitmonchan, who was trying to type “Entrainment” onto the computer, instead got “RWEDnmrtasxoin,mwengrteer” out of it. “This is why I hate modern technology.”

DING DONG! The Fighting type, stood up from the computer and sauntered into the door, hoping there was someone with fingers outside. When he opened the door, his eyes lighted up.

“HITMONCHAN!” The ex-champions entire family tackled him in the name of love.

“Mom! Dad! Sis! I missed you guys SO much!”

“Our brave fighter! How long has it been?”

“Like a year, right? I’ve lost count at this point.”

“Where are your friends?”

“They’re out shopping for food. They’ll be back any moment now. Anyway sit down! Let’s talk!” The three visitors sat on one couch, with Hitmonchan pulling up a chair from the dinner table.

“How’ve you been son? Who have you been fighting?”

“I recently lost to an Alakazam, but he’s a Psychic type so that’s ok.” Hitmonchan looked away, having bad memories of the day before. “So how have you guys been? Making a lot of cash?”

“The shop business has been BOOMING!” Hitmontop sat up straight. “A surplus of Magnemite came by, advertised a ton, and attracted Pokémon from around the world! Everyone loves my antiques, and Gothorita even helps out sometimes!”

“Correct.” The young Psychic type nodded. “I’ve got to say, there are some strange customers out there. They say the weirdest things, like ‘ninjas’ and ‘pit pat’ and even ‘shorts rule!’ I swear, some of them even repeat themselves!”

“Gothorita, don’t be so rude.” Gothitelle pat her daughter on the head. “Your grandfather always repeated himself about the natures of science. The power of science is staggering, according to him.”

“I remember that. So mom, how have you been? You’re still in the musical business, right?”

“Yes… The musical business has been REALLY slow… Ever since the movie theater opened up next to the musical theater, everyone’s been going there.”

“Oh… Maybe you should become a movie receptionist. Movies are becoming more popular. My favorite movie is ‘Invaders’.”

“That’s a good one. My favorite is…” As Hitmontop was speaking, the front door was SLAMMED open.

“HEYOOO!” Throh KICKED the door open while holding paper bags full of food. Lilligant popped up from behind him. “We’re home!”

“Guys! Guys! You missed something awesome! In Entrainment, Combusken slammed down a whole lot of Onix just to see Flareon and-“

“That’s a rerun, dude. That happened years ago.”

“Aw… This show is impossible. It never goes the way I want it to… Then again that makes it no different from other shows.”

“So you guys are Entrainnerds, too?” Gothitelle asked.

“Yeah! I don’t think I’ve heard anyone use that term before…”

“It was officially coined on their official website a week ago.”

“Gosh dang it! I knew I should’ve checked the website more often…” Throh snapped. “I thought Entrainers was the official term… But anyhow, I’m Throh!” After a few shaking of hands, Hitmontop spoke.

“I’m a big fan of yours.”

“Really? I still have those? I thought my fansites were dead.”

As Hitmontop was naming all of the famous feats Throh has done several years ago, Lilligant started a conversation with Gothitelle. “So you’re Hitmonchan’s mom. I see the resemblance.”

“Really? When most Pokémon find out that I’m a mother to Hitmons, they don’t believe it.”

“Yeah. My dad gets the same treatment…” DING DONG! “Maybe that’s him now.”

“I’ll get it!” Hitmonchan passed by his friends and family to reach the front door. He looked through the peep hole and only saw green. When opened the door, he looked up to see the visitor.

An enormous Ferrothorn greeted him at the door. “Hai!”

“Uh… Hi.” Hitmonchan did not expect to see such a huge Grass type as Lilligant’s father, especially as it was one he’d never seen before. “You’re Lilligan’t father?”

“That’s me!”

“Well come on in! Welcome to my… I mean Throh’s… apartment.”

“Looks nice.” The Ferrothorn walked in using its three vines, with another Lilligant and a Ferroseed entering soon afterwards.

“Hi there!”

“Mom! Dad! Ferroseed! I’m so glad you could make it!” Lilligant called out.

“So you’re the champion I’ve been hearing so much about! You look just your parents!”

As the two sets of parents began discussing a bunch of different topics, the youngest of each family walked away from the grown-ups and conversed, with Throh listening in.

“Hiya! I’m Gothorita. Are you Lilligant’s brother?”

“Yeah. I came here because I was promised a meal…”

Throh snapped his fingers. “That reminds me! I gotta go put the food in the oven! Plus I gotta check on the chocolate cake!”

The Ferroseed began to jump as if he was on a sugar rush. “Ooh! I want chocolate cake! Can we skip dinner and just eat dessert? Please?! Please?! Chocolate’s my favorite candy!”

“I like how this guy thinks!” Throh smiled and whispered to the Grass/Steel type, “Follow me to the back- I’ve got a mountain of chocolate bars!” He slowly crept out with Ferroseed jumping behind him. Gothorita looked at them as if they were idiots.

“Really? Chocolate? Chocolate is so fattening.”

As the two parent groups were still talking to each other and not to him, Hitmonchan slowly escaped the conversation and talked to his younger sister. “So how’s it been going, sis? Has school been ok?”

“Wait, you don’t know how I’ve been lately? Haven’t you been checking my Chatotter?”

“Your Chatotter? What’s that? Is it like Myregion?”

“Bro, you’ve got to get with the times! Chatotter is like Myregion… ONLY BETTER. It’s been out for months and everyone has one of those. Don’t you have one?”

“Sorry… A life of fighting really diminishes your social life to just your coach and your girlfriend.”

“Sounds legit. You’re girlfriend’s really pretty by the way. Prettier than me…”

“So back to my question, how has school been?”

“Terrible. Absolutely terrible. School is a dark, endless vortex of pain, torture, and dodgeballs. Hundreds and hundreds of dodgeballs… Life as a Gothorita is harsh…”

“You’re really putting the goth in Gothorita, huh? Or is it Middle Stage Depression Syndrome?”

“Probably both…”

“So you’ve only got two children?” Lilligant’s mother asked Hitmonchan’s mother.

“Yep. Do you?”

“We have three.”

“Our other oldest Lilligant is at college. She’s a genius!”

“I’m right here you know!” The younger Lilligant whined.


“Good news, everyone!” Throh announced like an old scientist. “The food will be ready in twenty minutes!

“Ten minutes?! That’s sixteen minutes too many!” Ferrothorn demanded. “I’m starving here!”

“Sorry, I’m not that good at this whole ‘cooking’ thing. I’ve never done it for multiple families before. I’d rather have done pizza.”

Ferrothorn frowned. “That’s a bummer. I would’ve been satisfied with pizza.” Throh proceeded to glare at Lilligant. There was then a moment of silence.

“So… Now what?”

“Why don’t you show us your fighting skills, son?” Hitmontop requested. “Give us a little demonstration of a fight up-close!”

“Okay…” Hitmonchan stood up. “Who do you want me to fight?”

“Why not Throh?”

“Me?” Throh pointed to himself.

“We’ve trained, but we’ve never fought in a real battle before… Well, I don’t see why not. Plus it’ll make the food we eat afterwards tastier.”

“Guys! Let’s head outside! And bring a few chairs, too!”


Outside the apartment, a ropeless fighting area was arranged. The sun was beginning to set, but it instead made for a beautiful, golden brown backround instead. The fight was about to take place on the rought, bumpy road, but no one really cared.

When everyone was done placing chairs outside, Ferroseed hopped out with multiple chocolate bars on his head. “Ferroseed! Where did you get that chocolate? And can I have some?”

“Throh’s secret chocolate stash. It’s under-“

“SHHHHH!” Throh whispered harshly from afar. “Remember our agreement!”


“Who do you think will win, Lilligant?” The mother asked her daughter.

“Hitmonchan of course. Doc really let himself go.”

“You sure? Throh did teach him everything he knew, so he should know all of his moves.”

“But wouldn’t that work the same in reverse?”

“I can’t believe this is the first battle I’m going to have with my own coach… I can’t believe it took me this long…”

“Meh, it’s not too bad of a wait.” Throh stretched. “I only got to fight my coach when I gave him enough stuff from the Nintendo Fun Club back in the day... Oh, and I gotta get this out…” Throh turned to the two families. “JOIN CLUB NINTENDO TODAY!”

“Sorry! I’m a Microsoft fan!” Ferroseed’s words caused Throh to gasp.

“That’s it! You’re not my friend anymore!”

“…And that’s why I hate my brother.” Lilligant commented as Gothorita stepped up to her and whispered something. “Hmm? Oh yeah! I know where one is!” The two ran off into the apartment, making everyone wonder where they went.

Minutes later, Gothorita and Lilligant exited the building holding up a small chalkboard with the words “ROUND 1” written on it. Gothorita also had a stopwatch in her hand as well.

“You girls didn’t have to do that, you know.”

“We have to. It wouldn’t be the same without it. Plus someone needed to keep time.”

“Ah, ok. But anyway, Chan!” The Fighting type quickly slipped on some black and white fingerless gloves. “This is called ‘old school!’ Hah hah hah!”

“Eh heh heh… I don’t get it.

“Keep it clean!” The two did a brofist and began to battle.

“Dodge!” Throh went first with a Low Sweep attack, and even though it didn’t have much radius it still hit. “Told ya to dodge… Block!” The red Pokémon simply used a straightforward Ice Punch, but Hitmonchan did infact block and counter with Fire and Thunderpunches. “Uh… I telegraphed that.”

Sure you did.”

“Come on!” Throh melded stones with his hands and blasted them up as a Stone Edge, hitting hard. He then missed with a Low Sweep and another Stone Edge before using a new attack.

“Hoo-WEE!” Throh improvised a move by slamming both of his fists together at Hitmonchan as if he was chucking someone while using Storm Throw. This gave Throh a star. “Wanna know something cool?!”

“No thank you… I know all of your chocolate eating records already…”

Throh crouched down, shook his right fist as it powered up with energy, and delivered a dangerous uppercut to Hitmonchan… But he parried to the left. “I INVENTED- Wut?!“

As the ex-champion (the one who lost his title the most recently) punched away, the receiver took the hits like a champion, even if he was pushed to the side at the end of the combo. “Ouch, Chan.”

“Quick feet, now! Quick feet!”

“My ability isn’t… Whoops!” Hitmonchan realized it was an expression just in time before dodging a Payback attack. It consisted of swooping his arm like a hook, except with dark energy. After being countered, another Low Sweep was used before Throh stopped the fight to do something both expected an unexpected.

“Mmm… Check THIS out!” Throh made a chocolate bar appear seemingly out of nowhere and was willing to wave it right in front Hitmonchan. “It’s an original Louis Brand, Double Chocolate, Extra-Large and Nutless Chocolate Bar from its 2012 wave. It is said to…”


The chocolate bar flew out of his hands and into the “audience,” where multiple monsters proceeded to fight over it. In the end Ferroseed got to eat it. Throh was less than pleased.

“NOOOOOOO! Now you’ve done it! You won’t like Doc when he’s angry… HERAAAAGH!” Throh reached for his clothes…

“Hunh? Fwah!” Hitmonchan’s plain, regular fighting expression turned to a disgusted and scared one at this sight.

With all of his strength, Throh ripped off his entire Judogi… To reveal another Judogi underneath, except this one was gold-colored and shiny. He tossed the old Judogi to the ground and kicked it away. All of a sudden, Hitmonchan’s Battle Logger, which was sitting on one of the chairs, began vibrating rapidly.

“You have ONE unheard message!” Gothorita hurried over, picked up the device, ran to her brother, and gave it to him.

“Thanks sis. Battle Logger, what does the message say?”

“Removal of Doc Throh’s chocolate bar may be hazardous to your health. The CPFA is not responsible for any frustration, hair pulling, or depression from this point forward. From Senior Weezing.” There was a picture as an attachment to the message. When opened, it was a seal of Throh smiling while giving a thumbs up.

“Weezing sent me this?!

“Senior Weezing has the ability to monitor almost all of the Battle Logger’s usages, but he does it the most with those connected with Champion Mode.”

That’s extremely creepy…”

“Oh, and just to spite you…” Throh stepped back, got an even larger chocolate bar and too a huge stomp out of it. “Mmm… That’s choc-tastic! Now… DUCK THIS ONE!”

Throh unleashed two superfast Bullet Punch attacks, but Hitmonchan was quick enough to dodge and counter easily. He then used Stone Edge three times in a row, causing no effect.

“Hoo-WEE!” Throh used his nearly unavoidable Storm Throw attack, and unleashed his own Sky Uppercut. However, right as Hitmonchan moved to dodge it…

“Round over!”

While the two paushed what they were doing to take a good rest, Lilligant and Gothorita passed by holding the chalkboard again. This time, the words INTERMISSION were written in big letters.

“Look, son. I want you to give 110% out there.”

“Uh… Throh, I don’t think you did your math right.”

“I know mathematically, it’s only possible to give 100%, but you gotta go beyond the impossible and SQUEEZE that extra 10% out there. SQUEEZE it!”

“But I’m barely giving 97.5% out there! It’s been an off day for me.”

“I think you’re giving 220% out there.” Lilligant, who was behind him rubbing his arm the whole time, remarked.

“Divide that by two and you’ll be all set!” Throh rubbed his next. “Now, I don’t know my own percentages… But I feel like I’m finally a fully rounded fighter, Chan! Ha ha ha!”

“Do you have any chocolate, Lil?” Hitmonchan asked, causing Throh’s eyes to light up. “I’m starving and feel like I could fall any moment…”

“No, but I can do this…” Instead of rubbing his arm, Lilligant started beating on his arm quickly.

“Hey! What are you doing?!”

“I read somewhere that rapid quick contact on the arm is a generally unorthodox but still usable way of healing. It worked well in the 90s.”

“Well it seems weird now, but… Wait… I actually feel better… It’s weird… But it’s working!”

“That’s all I can do now, I gotta go hold up the chalkboard again.”

A few minutes later, the two girls walked by the audience holding the chalkboard again. This time it read ROUND 2, this time with “round” being underlined.”

Throh was doing some heavy breathing before facing his apprentice. “Alright… Ding. Ding.”

“Keep it clean!” The two did their secret handshake once more, and the fight when on. “Get low!” Throh did a quick combo of both a Fire Punch and ThunderPunch, but failed to hit as he directly said his attack out loud. He then used a fierce Body Slam attack, but after he missed, Hitmonchan got a Star off of it. Being greedy for a good hit, the fierce fighter used his special immediately.


Throh sort of just looked at the shiny attack as he was propelled a few feet into the air. When the strong attacke made contact, it sounded some sort of a sonic boom. “Uh… I telegraphed that.”


“Hoo-WEE!” Hitmonchan however, didn’t telegraph the hit that just punched him aside. “I INVETNED- Wha?” Throh missed with his Sky Uppercut, proving that his accuracy has decreased over the years.

After more hits to the stomach, Throh hit his foe with Ice Punch, but right afterwards missed with Bullet Punch. Right after this, Throh unwrapped another chocolate bar to eat. “Mmm… Check THIS out!”


The chocolate bar flew in a different direction, falling near a bush. A Durant dashed out of the bush, grabbed it with its fangs, and dashed right back into the bush.“NOOOOOO! I… I told ya before, son!”

“Hoo-WEE!” This Storm Throw was so fast and so strong that it did just enough to knock the champion down. “Come on, Chan!”

Throh then stepped aside to get his counting fingers ready. “ONE! TOO! THREE! FO!”

Hitmonchan got right back up as if it was no problem. “Keep it clean!” Mere milliseconds after doing their handshake, Throh used Sky Uppercut, and finally finished what he was saying. “I INVENTED THE SKY UPPERCUT!” The uppercut felt like an Earthquake to Hitmonchan, and sounded like one, too.

“Learn your lesson yet? Never punch someone else’s chocolates to the ground. Anyway… ONE! TOO! THREE! FO!”

Hitmonchan got up despite wanting to hear more of Throh’s epic counting skills. All it took was dodging a Low Sweep and a Stone Edge to end the battle for good.

“Heruh!” Hitmonchan Ice Punched his instructor right in the tummy, causing him to lean over. “N..Nice one…” He slowly stepped back in weakness and fainted. “Ah…”

KO. The winner thought in his mind.

Five minutes of cheering and hugs later, Hitmonchan noticed that his instructor was still on the ground. Hitmonchan helped his fallen coach up, and the first words he said were, “Hoo-wee, son. You ready for some chocolate cake? A…ha ha ha…”


“Come on bro, you can do this!” Hitmonchan’s sister called from the stands. His entire family was at the ring to watch an official fight up close.


“FOCUS BLAST!” The attack looked terrifyingly dangerous, but Hitmonchan knew what to do this time and punched the energy blast right back for a decent amount of damage. “AYE-yo!” This repeated two more times before the new champion attempted to hit his opponent with Shock Wave…


This Sky Uppercut triggered an odd phenomenon. Alakazam ran out of his will to fight, and began teleporting around frantically. Once again, he sputtered words every few seconds.

“Oh man…” … “The pain!” “IT HURTS!” Kadabra teleported right onto the floor, fainted and dazed.

“Knockout! The champion is Little Hitmonchan once more!”

“WOO-HOO!” The champ’s parents roared in joy.

“Hah hah! My mom’s tips for fighting Psychic types really helped!” After a few seconds, the champ noticed something was wrong. “…Wait, why isn’t Throh up here, too?” He looked at the stands to see a sleeping Throh falling off of his chair.

“Zzzz… Chocolate…. Zzzz… Mismagius… Zzzz…”

“Oh… He’s still exhausted from the fight last night and fell asleep.”

As Lilligant was cheering as well, she was also worried for what was next. That makes my ex next… I hope he’s taken the breakup well…
Last edited:


Catcher of Ubers
Wow, great job on this one! I can tell a lot of time was put into this chapter. It may have been the funnest one yet.

I’d don’t give a dang about a bad reputation

I see what you did there! Great song reference, though the "I'd" should be an "I"

Great jokes throughout the whole chapter, though I especially like this one:

Ah. May I suggest a turkey?”

“A tur- what now?”

“I don’t know. Someone told me turkeys taste good, but I don’t know what one is

It was great finally meeting Chan's family, and it was great seeing them all interact, especially the younger siblings of Chan and Lilligant. The fight between Chan and Throh was fantastic and hilarious! Especially the knockout at the end.

Five minutes of cheering and hugs later, Hitmonchan noticed that his instructor was still on the ground. Hitmonchan helped his fallen coach up, and the first words he said were, “Hoo-wee, son. You ready for some chocolate cake? A…ha ha ha…”

That is so how I pictured him reacting. The only suggestion I have is that it seems sometimes after dialogue you don't mention who said it and I sometimes have to go back and figure out who said what. Just be sure to try and add something like "stated Throh" or "Chan said" after dialogue so it makes it a little less confusing. Not a major problem at all, just a suggestion. Otherwise, the chapter was great and I thoroughly enjoyed it! Can't wait for the next one when Don and Lilligant meet up again *awkwardness!*


Back in Blue
Wow, great job on this one! I can tell a lot of time was put into this chapter. It may have been the funnest one yet.

I see what you did there! Great song reference, though the "I'd" should be an "I"

Great jokes throughout the whole chapter, though I especially like this one:

It was great finally meeting Chan's family, and it was great seeing them all interact, especially the younger siblings of Chan and Lilligant. The fight between Chan and Throh was fantastic and hilarious! Especially the knockout at the end.

That is so how I pictured him reacting. The only suggestion I have is that it seems sometimes after dialogue you don't mention who said it and I sometimes have to go back and figure out who said what. Just be sure to try and add something like "stated Throh" or "Chan said" after dialogue so it makes it a little less confusing. Not a major problem at all, just a suggestion. Otherwise, the chapter was great and I thoroughly enjoyed it! Can't wait for the next one when Don and Lilligant meet up again *awkwardness!*

Hah hah, I had tons of fun writing that one, though I think it took the most combined writing time to write out of all the other chapters. That, and all of the other real life scenarios in the way.

I guess I'm not the only old school music fan around here! Then again, as an old teenager I have some of the strangest and oldest song choices out there.

Wanted to post this yesterday, but I forgot to put the document on my flash drive during a trip as I didn't have my computer on me. Ah well, better late than never.

I'm 'hoping' I can get the next chapter up a bit quicker than usual. Since the next one's chapter 50, expect something pretty original. But lthat's in the future, let's talk about the now!

Chapter 49: Don Ludicolo’s Revenge:

“Doo-dee-doop, dee-doo… Today’s such a great day…” A Jolly Ludicolo was walking in the city while he was eating an ice cream sandwich. I can’t wait for my match tomorrow… I bet it’ll be me getting to beat on Weavile again.

Along the way, he passed by a few child Pokémon, chatting about the news. “Hey did you hear the newest CPFA news, dude?” A Skorupi asked his Fire typed friend.

“Nope, not yet. My mom’s banned me from TV again. What happened?” Torchic was definitely curious.

“Little Hitmonchan defeated Great Alakazam! And it was quick, too!”

“Awesome! Hey, who’s he going to fight next?”


The sound of an ice cream sandwich hitting the floor caused the two kids to look at Ludicolo, who turned his head slowly to the two in a very creepy way.

“What. Did. You. Just. Say?”

“That Little Hitmonchan defeated Great Alakazam. See! This guy!” Skorupi showed the Grass/Water type a picture of Little Hitmonchan holding the victory belt once again. “He’s the coolest, isn’t he?” Ludicolo grabbed the paper and tore it in half.

“AGAFRAGAFLAGADAGGADAAAG!!” Ludicolo screamed as if his favorite toy was just broken in front of him. His face was steaming red and it looked like he was going to use Explosion. Instead, he ran as fast as an Accelgor to the gym.

The two kids didn’t care about the Pokémon’s anger and were instead looking at the delicious, sugary sandwich on the ground. “Hey, let’s go steal his ice cream sandwich!” Before the two could react, a Durant ran out of nowhere, picked up the sandwich, and then dug underground.

“…Dang it.”

“That’s it! I’m so going to beat him tomorrow!” Ludicolo began lifting weights rigorously.


The next day, Ludicolo wasn’t the same Ludicolo he used to be. His usually always-smiling self had morphed into an unpleasing frown. Ludicolo also now wore a dark blue hat as opposed to his light green one. He did not say word while he passed by hundreds of fans.

Hitmonchan, oblivious to the hybrids anger, greeted him. “Hey, Ludicolo! How’s it going?”

Ludicolo wasted not time and got right in his opponent’s face. “YOU!”

Ludicolo’s face looked absolutely horrifying right in front of the champion’s face.“Uh… Yes. Me. What about me?”

“You not only stole my title and became the champion, but you also stole my girlfriend! And that’s terrible!”

“He’s totally lying. I dumped him.” Lilligant whispered from her seat. “Where’d he get that hat? It makes him look as serious as Tyranitar.”

“Y’know, I saw a hat just like it at the hardware store a week ago.” Throh hinted. “Hint hint, everything is at the hardware store!”

“The thrift store is better!”

As Lilligant and Throh were arguing about the more dominant type of stores, Hitmonchan shrugged and looked back at the panting, maniacle Ludicolo that looked like he could tear a pretty relaxing.”

“Be quiet, you ignoramus! If I can’t have my Lilligant, nobody will!”

“Woah there… You know there’s probably hundreds of other Lilligant in the world who would be exactly ecstatic if a pro wrestler like you were to date them…”

“Perhaps the same could be said for all Pokémon. Why don’t you do that?!”

“Well, I’d rather not create any drama. You’re the single one, you can find one for yourself.”

“You’re just wasting time at this point! The banter ends here!” Ludicolo arranged his dark hat took a black rose out of it, looked at it, and then threw it aside. “I am Don Ludicolo. You stole my girlfriend. PREPARE TO DIE.”

***ROUND 1***

“Come at me bro!”

After hearing the overused phrase, Hitmonchan did exactly that. Ludicolo used the same old Zen Headbutt as he did before. The champion blissfully hit back with a few Fire and Thunderpunches. “Fight me! Or else you will DIE!”

“You’re just full of overused phrases today, aren’t ya?”

The two continued to battle, with Ludicolo using mostly the same moves as before. He’d Taunt, and then use a Zen Headbutt, Scald, or Razor Leaf attack. As time passed, the champion did way more damage than Ludicolo did.

“For the last freakin’ time, the hardware store is the best store! People write SONGS about that store!”

“What if those songs are terrible?”

“No! There are awesome… Well there’s one awesome song! Search it on the internet!”

“Shouldn’t we be watching the fight? What if our Hitmonchan’s losing?”

“Oh the fight? Chan’s probably winning.” SMASH! “See! He just knocked that hat guy down!”

“Maaah…” Ludicolo used a quick Zen Headbutt when he got back up to battle, but failed to make contact. “I see you’ve learned much in your past two months of fighting competitively… But is that all you’ve learned?” When the champ attempted a Thunderpunch, something out of the ordinary occurred.

This time, Ludicolo tried an entirely new tactic. Ludicolo used Counter by spinning away from the Thunderpunch, and coming back around to deliver a quick punch from the side. He did the same thing when the Fighting type tried a Fire Punch.

“Vamanos! Vamanos!” The match continued as he dodged an incoming punch, and countered. “Razor Leaf!”

Hitmonchan punched him beforehand for a Star and went for the uppercut. “SKY UPPERCUT!”

Ludicolo carefully moved to the right to avoid the commonly used uppercut. “Oo! Idiot… Venga! Venga!”

The Grass/Water type’s plan of attack was using Scald twice and then Razor Leaf, but those attacks were unsuccessful. So he went to his super-special attack.

“Uno! Dos! Tres!” He seemed to clap more aggressively than normal, but he looked the same as he used Ice Punch, but also used Teeter Dance at the same time. From Hitmonchan’s perspective, he saw a fat, duck monsters spinning on his toes frantically while occasionally pulling his arm out for an Ice Punch.

After an intense spin, the user was seeing stars. “Ah… I should’ve LEARned that move CORRECtly from Roseraaa-“

The champ used this opportunity to gains Stars, and a Sky Uppercut did quite a bit of damage. Not enough for a KO, but still quite a bit. All it took was a few more punches afterwards and Ludicolo went down. When he did get up, Ludicolo could only pull off a Zen Headbutt before the round ended.

“Round over!”


“I am Don. Don Ludicolo.”

“Why yes you are… Don’t you have anything else to say?”

“I’m speaking less to conserve my energy…” Ludicolo had a silly, yet sadistic grin on his face. His panting was so quick and quiet that none could hear it. “Deep down inside I want to swear at you.”

“Oh. Well that’s good to know.”

“Every rose has its thorn, Chan.” Throh recited as he crunched on his nutty and delightful chocolate bar, “But then again not all thorns have roses… What I’m saying is, be that thorn in Ludicolo’s side.”

“Judging by his actions, you’re already a thorn in his side.” Lilligant added.

“Take a chocolate bar!” Throh passed his apprentice an open bar of chocolate, but it was about 5% smaller than usual. “It’s a new brand. Has tons of potential in my opinion.”

The fighter tossed it into his mouth, chewed, and his eyes began to open from the sugary goodness. “Woah… This tastes great! I feel like all of my energy’s restored! Seriously! I’m completely revitalized, energized…” Hitmonchan stood up, and clenched his fist. He ready to fight, “…But I’m still hungry.”

***ROUND 2***

Aside from a few grunts, Ludicolo said nothing as he stood up to battle his foe. He used Drain Punch twice before a tragedy happened. One specific Thunderpunch to the face from Hitmonchan tilted Ludicolo’s head at the worst-possible angle, causing his hat to disappear.

WHOOSH! The black sombrero Ludicolo was wearing was knocked several yards into the air. A Sharpedo leaped into the air and grabbed it with its fangs.

“Excellent!” The Sharpedo exclaimed in a surfer tone. “This hat is so going on my wall!”

However, this did not anger Ludicolo, as there was another, smaller, straw hat under his original hat that was firmly on the Grass/Water type’s noggin.“Ah hah! I had a trick up my sleeve! I had TWO hats on! Quite a foolproof plan, yes?”

Hitmonchan waltzed over to the Grass/Water type, took his hat off, and threw it like a frisbee to Raichu. He tossed it up a few times in a “I don’t want this,” kind of matter, and threw it to the Magnezone who was recording the whole thing.

“Hey cool! A hat!” The Electric type turned to his assistant. “Gardevoir! We might be able to sell this for mad profit!”

“Not a half bad idea… I’ll check Terrakazon right now… No… Emolbay.” After a few clicks on her smartphone, Gardevoir was flipping through the pages of Emolbay, and with a search for ‘CPFA fighters,’ she was astounded by what she found. “O. M. G. I did not realize competitive fighters merchandise was this expensive.”

Lilligant turned her head when she heard the two reporters bumbling. “Oh hey it’s those two again. Haven’t seen them in forever.”

“Ack! Ha! ERGH! My foolproof plan has been fooled! FOOLPROOF PLANS ARE NOT MEANT TO BE FOOLED!” Ludicolo, in a rage, used Fury Swipes twice, even though the attacks were uneffective and resulted him getting a few punches. While mad, he tried something unexpected.

“Olé!” Ludicolo waggled his fist back and forth and punched Hitmonchan immensely hard using a Flail attack… Twice. This all happened in the span of just one second. Needless to say the champ couldn’t take such quick and harmful hits and fell.

“One…two…three… four…”

“Perfecto…” Ludicolo wasn’t in a rage anymore, and used a Zen Headbutt right off the bat with no imput from the champion. He then used Scald twice, but failing to do damage. Right after this, he went for his most powerful attack.

“Uno! Dos! Tres! Quatro, cinco!” The opponent used his special move five times, but it ended up having no difference of an effect besides being more time consuming.

Hitmonchan blocked the incoming Drain Punch, and punched the confused duck for another Star. He also managed to counter a Razor Leaf for another. This all led up to the inevitable special attack when the Grass/Water type was stunned.


The Three-Star Sky Uppercut was just enough to knock down Ludicolo for a rather long count, but he was still up and at it after a bit. He could only pull off two Zen Headbutts, a Razor Leaf, and Counter (which hit) before the round ended.


“Don’t roses look so much more dramatic when they’re painted black?”


“I WASN’T ASKING YOU!” Ludicolo seemingly exploded at Throh’s answer. “Answer my question, Hitmonchan.”

“I guess they do? I’m not one for fashion sense.” Hitmonchan muttered.

“If and when I beat you, these are going back to being a sparkling red.” Ludicolo went back to admiring his black rose and began to sniff it.

“Let’s go, Chan! Dance like a Beautifly, and bite like a Masquerain. I’m talking about a BIG Masquerain, baby. A great, great, BIG one! As big as a chocolate cake! Chocolate cake… I’m gonna go grab some more chocolate bars.” The hungry Throh stood up to run to the nearest vending machine. Lilligant moved closer to Hitmonchan to whisper something into his ear.

“Do you want to know a secret about my old ex over there?”

“Ooh, secrets! Tell me!”

“He hates being attacked as he recovers from an attack.”

“That wasn’t much of a secret. I wanted a more jucier one…”

“Oh, and he’s afraid of Farfetch’d.”

***ROUND 3***

When the battle began, Ludicolo used a Zen Headbutt, and it opened up the opportunity for him to use a Counter attack to surely hit his opponent. His Razor Leaf attack then led him to be able to use Zen Headbutt again.

“Woah, you’re just really spamming the combo attacks!”

“Come on! Come on! Want some more?”

Hitmonchan’s next punch forced Ludicolo to use Drain Punch. “Guess I’ll have to BREAK your COMBO!” Hitmonchan knocked the challenger to the right with a Fire Punch, then to the left with a Thunderpunch. Ludicolo blocked the next Fire Punch though.

He tried to combo him again by using Fire Punch, Thunderpunch, but then used Ice Punch. This kept him juggling in the air, further annoying the Grass/Water type. The pattern in Hitmonchan’s head was to use a jab, jab, and then a body blow. The cycle would then endlessly loop until Hitmonchan messed up.

“Uno! Dos! Tres! Quatro! Cinco!” Ludicolo used his final resort as the strongest Ice Punch and Teeter Dance combo that he could, but he missed every opportunity. After a few punches and the gain of a star, the champion finished him off.


“Augh!” Ludicolo was sent stepping backwards, and as he tried to come to his senses, he picked up the black rose he had in his sleeve, and fell on his back. “Aigh…” The rose bended down as if he was flat-out dead.

“Knockout! The winner is Little Hitmonchan!”

As the crowds screamed and screeched in love, Ludicolo crushed his rose before completely fainting. “Mac… will… fail…”


While the three began to head home, Throh started his usual "after a fight" routine/motivational speech. “Hey Hitmonchan! How did you get so good? Oh wait! I trained you! Aha ha hah! Join Club Nintendo today, Chan!”

“I did that already…”

“Really? Well tell your sister to join it or something.”


Back in Blue
"This fan fic shall not perish!" -Hilijix

Chapter 50: The Metamon Mishap Part 1

“Yo! Champ in the making!” The lazy and tired Throh called out from his sofa. He dipped his chocolate bar in a warm cup of milk and took a chomp out of it. “Someone put a letter in the door slip with your name on it.”

Hitmonchan, who was waking up from a dream about snow tigers, pushed himself to reach the door. “Uck… Better not be another ad for dry-cleaning…” The half-awake Fighting type swiped the envelope from the door, and crushed it on the counter a few times to get it to open itself. Hitmonchan quickly scanned the paper inside. “It’s a letter from Lil…”

“Why’d she send you a letter? Doesn’t that gal know what email is?”

“Well I always did think she was old fashioned. A week ago, she told me that her dream date would be me rescuing her from a murdering Salamence and riding off with her into the sunset on a Zebstrika.”

“…Nope, that sounds perfectly normal to me. What does it say? What does it say?!”

The Fighting type cleared his throat, and opened his eyes. “Dear Hitmonchan, I’d like to have a talk with you behind the apartment. Just me and you. Don’t bring Throh into this. From your beloved, Lilligant.” Hitmonchan glanced at his coach.

“OH! Eh heh heh… Riiiiight… I get it. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be in here sipping some hot cocoa… Once I make some hot cocoa… Take as much time as you want!”

Hitmonchan ignored his coach’s remarks and went outside, thinking it would only take about ten minutes.

About twenty-five minutes later, the door slowly creaked back open. Hitmonchan slowly crept in with a less tired and more determined look on his face.

“What happened back there?”

“Oh, nothing of relevance,” The fighting type grinned and pointed to the door. “Come on, my fat friend, let’s go visit the CPFA. I’d like to chat with one of my… err…friends!”

“Fat? I thought we had this discussion already. It’s ‘big boned,’ not fat.”

“Yes, yes. Let’s go, big boned one.” Hitmonchan opened the door to wait outside. Before Throh went out the door, he noticed Hitmonchan left his Battle Logger on the counter. Throh took it for the time being.


“Really? You like power metal too? That’s so sick!” Lilligant was standing outside the CPFA, chatting with Blissey about music. Hitmonchan and Throh met them during their stroll to the fighting institute. “Oh, hi Hitmonchan. Hi Throh.”

“Yo!” Throh greeted. Hitmonchan just waved his hand with a grin.

“Hiya! Hey, by any chance, would any of you two want any muffins? Roserade gave me a box this morning.”

“Are they chocolate muffins?” Throh needed clarification.

“Sorry, I ate those already.”

“Then no thank you.”

“Well I would like some muffins!” Hitmonchan followed Blissey inside the CPFA, leaving Throh and Lilligant alone outside.

“So I heard some stuff happened behind the apartment!” Throh raised his eyebrows twice.

“Uh… What apartment?” Lilligant tilted her head.

“You had ol’ Chan go behind our apartment this morning.”

“I…wasn’t near your apartment at all this morning.”

“Ah you’re just denying it! Some juicy stuff probably happened there!”

“GUYS!” Suddenly, Hitmonchan came running towards the two. “Guys… You’ll never believe what happened.”

“Didn’t you just go inside? How’d you get back outside? Did you learn how to use Teleport?”

“No, no… I’m talking about this morning with Lilligant’s letter.”

“I never sent you a letter.”

“Aha! That proves something’s fishy…. When I went behind the apartment, I couldn’t find Lilligant. Then after about twenty seconds of looking, I heard someone yell the words 'GARBAGE DAY!' and saw a Weavile jump down from above and mug me in an enormous sack! Then I felt another Pokémon lift me up and toss me into the dumpster! Thankfully I was able to Fire Punch myself out of it before the garbage trucks came, but I smelled so bad that I went inside to take a shower, and Throh wasn’t their so I assumed you were at the CPFA, and here I am.”

“But we just saw you go inside the CPFA! Dude, is this some prank or something?”

Right as Throh asked the question, Hitmonchan just exited the CPFA with a muffin in hand. When he saw the other Hitmonchan, he dropped the muffin in surprise and gasped. “Hey! It’s another me!”

“Who are you?”

“I’m Little Hitmonchan. Champion of the CPFA. Who are you?”

“I’m the real Little Hitmonchan! And you’re just a fake!”

“No, I AM!”

As the two began arguing over which one was real, Throh shouted to the skies, “Two Hitmonchan? WHAT IS THIS SORCERY?”

Unlike the out of control coach that was next to her, Lilligant was rather calm.“Okay, which one of you is the real you?”

“I AM!” Both Hitmonchan answered simultaneously.

“Wait… I know how we can solve this!” Throh reached into his suit and took out Hitmonchan’s Battle Logger. “This’ll tell who’s who!” Throh fiddled with the device until it began its scanning function. He pointed it to the Hitmonchan who had just ran from his apartment to the CPFA.

“Little Hitmonchan.”

“Okay then. Now who’s this guy?”

“Ditto. The Transform Pokémon. It can reconstitute its entire cellular structure to change into what it sees, but it returns to normal when it relaxes.”

The fake Hitmonchan chuckled before reverting back to a Ditto. “Hyuk hyuk! That’s it… You’ve caught me… But I’m not going back to jail!”

“Jail? Hey! You’re that Morph Riffraff dude, aren’t you!” Throh pointed. “I remember hearing on the news that you busted out recently.”

“Okay… So what does this have to do with me?” Hitmonchan questioned.

“YOU ruined my disguise that one time! Remember that Prinplup you knocked off of that scooter? THAT WAS ME.”

“Hmm… Don’t remember.”

“Do you have any flashbacks? Any? Any at all? Please?” Lilligant insisted.

The Ditto ignored the question. “I was going to have my revenge by taking control of your life, starting with resigning your position out of the CPFA. Later I was going to break you up with your beloved, lose all contact with your coach, and then steal all your cash! But here you are! So I’ll have to go for plan B…”

“And that is?” Hitmonchan’s right fist became enriched with electricity.

“DESTROY YOU!” The Ditto hopped up and began shapeshifting. He more than tripled his size, grew dark gray fur, and it spouted the most impressive set of facial hair Hitmonchan had ever seen. Ditto had transformed into Stoutland, and wasted no time charging at his foe. “WAAAAAARG!”

“WAAAH!” Hitmonchan ran for his life to avoid the Stoutland’s Take Down attack. When he got tired of running, he saw an old but enormous wooden cabin. In hope that it would hide him from the shapeshifter, he turned around, noticed the Normal type was gone from sight, and began to enter the cabin.

Inside, there were plenty of massive boxes, so the champion thought it would be safe to hide behind one of them. Only one window provided a source of light, but it was enough to see clearly. When all was quiet, Stoutland BASHED the door down and immediately saw Hitmonchan’s hiding spot.

The Stoutland began to Transform. It grew into a humanoid shape, and its arms multiplied. It had morphed into a Machamp, dumbfounding Hitmonchan.

“How’d you do that?! Ditto are not supposed to be able to do that!”

“I’m no ordinary Ditto…” As the Machamp slowly approached his opponent, he gave him his life story.

“I was a science experiment that tried to unlock the full potential of the move Transform and the ability Imposter. The scientists GAVE me the power to Transform into anything I’ve seen before as many times as I want at any time! However, after that, they forgot me and moved onto things like finding out how Hydration works. They left me in a cage for eight months! EIGHT. MONTHS. They didn’t know that I had feelings! So! I broke out and decided to use my powers for my own good!”

Hitmonchan was quite for about ten seconds before speaking.“I feel sorry for you. But that doesn’t mean you can just use your powers for yourself!”

“This is my life, not yours!” Machamp began to run towards Hitmonchan, with his fist turning a light blue hue. As he was charging up a Focus Punch, he screamed. “AAAAAG!”


“AAAAAG!” Super Macho Machamp, who was getting a back massage from a Gardevoir in his secret pad, screamed in agony.

“What is it sir? Am I doing it too hard?”

“Oh nothing… I just feel like someone’s impersonating my macho-awesomeness… And isn’t doing a very good job of doing it! Anyhow, back to my massage… Ooh… Ooh… OOOOOOH! Now that’s what I’m talking about!”


“AAAAAG!” Hitmonchan stopped the Focus Punch by Bullet Punching the Machamp’s chest, and unleashing a Sky Uppercut to the four armed freak’s head. “Fwag! That hurt was more than it should have!” Those were the words the Machamp screeched before falling into a sea of boxes.

Hitmonchan took a deep breath, knowing that this wasn’t the end. He anticipated what creature the Ditto would turn into next. An Empoleon? A Venomoth?

While he brainstormed the seemingly endless powers the Ditto could posess, a Joltik hopped onto Hitmonchan’s forehead. It rotated his body on him for a second before rubbing his head and calling a wicked thunderbolt onto his head.

“YAAAAAARGH!” Angry, Hitmonchan picked up the Joltik off of his head, crushed it as much as he could, and Fire Punched it out of his hand and into a maze of boxes.

Seconds later, a Whirlwind was forming around the fighter. Hitmonchan suspected a Swanna or Whimsicott. When it stopped for a second to use Swift, the champion could not believe what he was seeing. It was a Deoxys in its Speed form.

“You… you can transform into LEGENDARIES?!”

“Look pal, I’ve been everywhere! I’ve seen and can transform into nearly 300 monsters! It would be a dream if I could transform into em’ all though!” The Deoxys used a multiple mighty Extremespeed attacks. He Bullet Punched blindly into the whirlwind, and despite being a Deoxys, Ditto had no idea where he was going and crashed into Hitmonchan’s arm, tripping into the air, and landed on the floor, skidding until he hit a wall.

When he stood up to look at the fallen Psychic type, Hitmonchan didn’t seem too impressed. “Man, Deoxys is way cooler in the movies than in real life…”

“Shut up!” The Deoxys whipped the nonbeliever with a Knock Off attack to push him away, giving him time to transform. The Deoxys morphed into a smaller but more flexible creature. Instead of growing, it began shrinking and shrinking until it was only a foot tall. It grew electric sparks, and always had a grin on its face.

The Rotom hopped around as it saw the contents of one of the boxes, and instantly jumped in. Within a few seconds, a phantom microwave levitated up from the boxes., growing arms and a face. Rotom had transformed into its fire variant. “Okay, let’s turn up the heat in here!

Rotom-H used his strongest attack, Overheat, by just seemingly bursting with fire. The fire not only overpowered Hitmonchan, but also all the other boxes as they ignited on fire, and even the wooden cabin.

“I think you turned the heat up too high!” Hitmonchan made a mad dash to the exit of the BURNING CABIN. Ditto paralyzed him with a jolt of electricity (Thunder Wave) to slow him down. The paralysis weakened him so much that it forced him to have to crawl on the floor. As Ditto approached, a new challenger appeared.

“Hey, Ditto!” Throh was right at the door. “Hands off MY FRIEND!” Throh casted a powerful Stone Edge at the electric microwave, and it was knocked onto the floor with a freaked out look on its face. Throh dragged his apprentice off before the entire cabin disintegrated.

During the aftermath, Heat Rotom was covered with dust and ashes, so it appeared that he had disappeared. Throh and Hitmonchan met up with Lilligant outside.

“I’m so glad to see you guys right- AGH! Paralysis hurts!”

“Sorry that I didn’t go in there…” Lilligant apologized as she handed him a spray can labeled “Full Restore.” “I’m a Grass type and Fire, well… Y’know…”

“No problem.” One spray of the Full Restore relived him of his paralysis and . “I feel fully refreshed! … But I’m still hungry.”

“Hungry, huh? I can fix that!” Throh held up a chocolate bar. Suddenly, an Ice Beam was shot towards it, turning it into a chocolate icicle. Throh blinked a few times, looked to the sky and let out a bloodcurling scream. “NOOO! A frozen chocolate bar is different than a chocolate bar! That was one of my newest ones, too!”

“One of?”

“Hah hah hah… hah hah hah…” Ditto, now transformed into a Regice, laughed in its robotic voice as it pushed aside the wreckage.

“NOW IT’S GETTING PERSONAL!” Throh took matters into his own hands by charging straight at the legendary, avoiding all Ice Beams and Ice Shards that were shot at him. The red Pokémon hit hard with a Fire Punch to the face, but Regice used the opportunity to fire a close up Charge Beam at him. Throh shakes it off and picks up the 390 or so pound monster and throws him directly above him with Storm Throw.

In mid-air, Regice shapeshifted into a Feraligatr and opened its mouth wide as it descended. Throh was too slow to react and received a massive Crunch on the forehead. “YEEEEEOOOW!”

“I’ll get it off of him!” Lilligant stepped foward and put both of her leafy arms together, and when she released them a shiny green ball of energy was in its place. She slammed the Energy Ball towards the two fighters. “HADOUKEN!”

Feraligatr stopped biting when he saw the Grass type move, and hopped off of his prey. The Energy Ball instead his Throh, causing him to fall down in pain. “Ow, my RED HEAD!”

“Sorry!” Feraligatr ran on all fours to avoid being pelted by a flurry of Energy Balls. After circling her once, he ran up to give her a powerful Ice Fang to the head.

“Get off of her!” The champion screeched as he charged at the Ditto and punched him off with a Thunderpunch. Being a super effective hit had a really big knock-back effect to the Feraligatr. He fell to the scorched earth, using only his arm to hold him up.

“I’m getting weak…” The Feraligatr muttered before transforming again, but to a completely different body type. Its blue design became a more olive-colored one, and it sprouted rapidly flapping wings. Within a few seconds, Feraligatr had turned into Yanmega. “I’ve gotta find something to eat!” The Bug type flew away at an intense speed.

“Come on guys, let’s chase him!”


Back in Blue
Chapter 51: The Metamon Mishap Part 2

The chase was on as the famed Ditto thief (Morph Riffraff) in Yanmega form was speeding away from the three meddling monsters, Hitmonchan, Throh, and Lilligant. Yanmega was fast, but since it didn’t have the Speed Boost ability it could be faster.

Yanmega’s tentative plan of attack was to use Signal Beam a few times to slow his enemies down.

The Signal Beams did a normal amount of damage (thanks to its ability) on the two Fighting types, but pelted Lilligant so hard that she was knocked onto the grass, sluggishly tumbling away.

“Lil!” The Fighting type slowed down as he looked behind him, but Throh told him to ignore her for now.

“There’s no time! We won’t be able to catch up with that bug if we stop to help her!”

The two kept running, but were outran as Lilligant did a mad dash towards the insect, shocking them both. “What the…”

“Quiver Dance, baby!” The boosted Grass type clapped her hands to create a quick Energy Ball, and shot it immediately. Yanmega turned around and countered with a Bug Buzz, negating the Energy Ball’s attack and slowing down the Grass type.

Yanmega didn’t turn back around in time, and when it did turn around, it faceplanted into a nearby tree. One Fire Punch did enough damage to the defenseless bug that it set it on fire, and it flew behind the wall of a buidling at superspeed to recover. The three grouped for a moment to catch their breath before they looked to see what was behind the corner.

Throh began to start walking towards the corner, but his apprentice stepped ahead of him. “Let me handle this. I’m what he wants.” Hitmonchan’s left fist ignited on fire.

He crept towards the corner, hoping that Ditto didn’t transform into something resistant or immune to fire, like a Quagsire or a Rapidash.

He turned quickly and Fire Punched…

…and didn’t hit his intended target. Yanmega was not there. In fact, nothing was there. Nothing but a few weeds and some mold on the wall. It looked like a Trubbish missed with his Acid Spray attack. Nevertheless, Hitmonchan didn’t see any other Pokémon whether he looked up, down, left, or right. So, he turned around and-



The Punchy Pokémon fell to the floor from the view of Ditto’s transformation… He had turned into a Dusknoir and spooked the living daylight out of him. The Ghost turned invisible to avoid any subsequential punches, appeared behind the fighter and gave him a punch of his own, of the Shadow variety.

The Ghost type continued to parry away from each attack gradually rotating around his enemy to avoid punches. After rotating twice, Dusknoir went intangible when he was right in front of Throh, causing a Hitmonchan’s nasty Thunderpunch to his Throh in the nose.

“YYYARG! By bhose! Byou bhert by bhose!”

“Sorry, Doc!”

“Gyah hack hah… What’s the matter, Channy?” Dusknoir chortled. “Can’t bust a ghost? You better call a…” Dusknoir was slammed away by a powered up Energy Ball before he could finish his sentence. Before he could be hit by another, he flew up high and shapeshifted to a more resistant form.

A heavy, humanoid creature smashed down on the grass. It had a red and yellow style going to it, and had what appeared to be cannons for arms. Flames arose from its head and arms. Ditto had just become a Magmortar.

The Fire type unleashed a Flamethrower that blasted at 3,600 degrees Farenhit (at least from the Battle Logger’s perspective) at the powerful flower. Even with extra Special Defense from a Quiver Dance, she did not enjoy the power of heat blasting in her face.

“RAAA!” Hitmonchan and Throh dynamically dashed up to the firing Fire type and gave it a Mega Punch to the face. Magmortar swiped them away and used Heat Wave on them by shooting puffs of firey gas into the air.

Hitmonchan, who was getting fatigued from these constant and repetitive fights, made a run for it. “Doc! Let’s run!

“Just let me use one more Stone Edge first…” With a snap of a finger, Throh sent a spiraling spiral of stones to the enemy. The sharp edged rocks strangely exploded into Magmortar, creating a puff of smoke and a Donphan rolled right out of the clearing with Rollout.

Hitmonchan and Throh were approaching the CPFA while being chased by a rolling elephant. The armored elephant rolled closer and closer before making contact directly at Throh’s forehead and knocking him to the side, and then trampled over Hitmonchan. He rolled on him until pinned Hitmonchan to the ground.

Donphan Stomped on the Fighting types skull. “THIS is for sticking me back in jail!” The champion tried to use Ice Punch, but his left arm was pinned down. “AND THIS is for.. GYAG!”

Donphan took a heavy hit by Lilligant from behind him, who had used Giga Drain to suck the life out of the Ground type, and recover some health back. Heavily injured, the Donphan collapse on its side.

“Nice one Lil! How did you grow so strong?”

“I grew up in the ghetto part of town- a strong fighting strategy is crucial for surviving even a month where I lived.”

“SURPRISE!” Ditto jumped up from behind Lilligant and shapeshifted at an intense speed into a Carnivine, and latched himself onto her. Carnivine used Vine Whip to keep the Grass type in place and used its own Giga Drain.

“This is SO uncomfortable!” The Grass type squirmed. “Hitmonchan! Don’t just stand there!”

Hitmonchan Fire Punched him off, but Ditto was not done as his Power Whip smacked both of his enemies hard. Lilligant fell over, dazed and tired, while Hitmonchan ran up to the chomping grass chomper and gave it more Fire Punches.

At this point, a massive crowd of Pokémon that were leaving the stadium noticed the brawl that was occuring. When they saw Little Hitmonchan involved, they were immediately interested and flocked to him like any curious monster would.

Meanwhile, Carnivine had turned into a Munchlax and Stockpiled as much as he could before Spitting Up a green energy blast at Hitmonchan’s face. Hitmonchan grabbed the Munchlax by the head and used him as a punching bag while Lilligant silently crawled away to recover.

Between every punch, he spouted out one word dramatically. “WHEN. WILL. YOU. GIVE!” Before the Fighting type could finish, he heard chanting from the crowd that spontaneously circled around them.

The Pokémon themselves didn’t know what they were seeing, but they were chanting, “FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!” Some of them used this opportunity as a way to swipe cash from others by forcing visitors to pay if they wanted to see.

“What are all these guys doing? It’s like our fight is some sort of performance.”

Then I’ll give em’ a show! Munchlax climbed onto Hitmonchan’s head while he was distracted, turned into its normal form, and covered his face like an ooze of slime.

“Get offa me you thief!” Hitmonchan tugged and tugged, but Ditto was stuck onto his face like a pack of glue. When he punched the Normal typed blob, a flash occurred.

When the lights dimmed, the crowd gasped, and Hitmonchan saw the worst (or best) possible transformation he would have to fight…

It wasn’t a Qwilfish…

It wasn’t a Spiritomb…

It wasn’t a Slowking…

It wasn’t a Genesect…

And it wasn’t even an Arceus…

…It was himself. Another Hitmonchan.

Ditto’s interpretation looked a bit different than an average one. Its skin was a bit lighter and its gloves were blue instead of red.

The spectators immediately reached for their smartphones to obsessively take pictures.The real Hitmonchan was confused at first, but turned his emotion into a smirk. “Oh, so it’s an evil clone fight now? Fine by me! I’ve always wanted to see how I fight!”

Ditto punched Hitmonchan before anyone could even go, ROUND 1, showing how anxious he was to fight.

Both sides had the same moves, and neither could think of a better strategy besides punching and dodging. However, Ditto was more dominant in attacking, so Hitmonchan waited for him to move, dodged, and counter and did more damage than Ditto did.

A good few minutes into the fight, Ditto fell to the ground. He remained there for only five seconds, and realized quickly he had to change tactics.

This whole clone thing isn’t working… I am not going to lose in front of hundreds of monsters again… “RAAAAA!” The fake Hitmonchan tensed his muscles as he transformed in mid-fight.


Ditto’s muscles intensified to an amazing kilometer. He grew larger, wider, and stronger. Ditto’s stress level calmed down yet grew at the same time. His entire body was malformed into a malevolent monstrosity…

Ditto had become a Slaking, and his first words in his new form were words of glory and clobbering.

“SLAKING SMASH!” The brutal brute Mega Punched the fighter with an astounding force. When he came to his senses, Slaking Mega Punched him a second time, knocking him straight to the ground. He began to cavort like a monkey donkey creature who successfully found eighty bags of fruit.


The champion had faced hits worse than this, but he was not as willing to fight back as he’d usually be. He knew how devastating the species was from past experiences.

Hitmonchan focused more on the defensive side than offensive, and evaded about two of the six punches to the face. Eventually, Slaking went onto the defensive side and guarded his head.

“SMARS!” Slaking couldn’t help but scream and poke his head from behind his arms. Hitmonchan made the most out of this with a lucky shot. The Fighter went straight for a Sky Uppercut, and since Ditto had no clue what it was, he took the hit like a monster.

No one actually knew if the correct amount of time had passed for the round to be finished, but they ended the round anyway.


Hitmonchan and Slaking were silently staring at each other vibrantly as Throh walked onto the scene. He was not happy.

Hitmonchan hoped for some relief and hints in order to best the beast. “Throh! Finally! You made it! Could you give me some advice on how to…”

“I traded chocolate bars for THIS?! I owe that cheapskate Floatzel a beating…” Throh grumbled.

“Ahem? My fight? I’m fighting myself?”

“Oh, sorry son. I’ve gotten a real bonk to the noggin. Umm… Best foot forward?”

“Chocolate would suffice…” The fighter coughed.

“…Well okay, but I’ve only got five more of them now. Eat it with joy!”

At the start of ROUND 2, the more heroic challenger knocked down the hulking challenger with only a few punches.

“HwOAH!” Slaking flipped over in slow motion and slammed against the pavement. Fans cheered as Hitmonchan leered at his victim. Not ready to fall yet, he pushed himself up like a zombie, and gargled at his opponent.

Slaking coughed out another yell before freezing. “…..Hmph?!” Slaking had a surge of energy disappear from him, and within a second, he morphed back to a clone Hitmonchan. “Well… That’s not supposed to happen…”

“Works for me!” Hitmonchan gladly smacked the fake in the face and the fight continued.

Meanwhile, Lilligant managed to make her way to Throh through pushing, attracting, and insulting her way through a mass smorgasbord of fans. “Okay… What did I miss?”

“It’s two Hitmonchan in a melee together! It’s a clash of the ages!”

“Y’know usually I like instances of two Hitmonchan, but this is not what I had in mind!”

“What did you have in mind?”

“I envisioned… Nah, you’re too old. You wouldn’t understand.”

“Hey hey hey! The older you get, the better you get!” Throh flexed his muscles as he chanted this.

As this was going on, both Hitmonchan were sweating, panting, and were on their last legs of energy. “Getting tired, huh?”

“No…” The fake closed in on the real one and went all out in punches with a Close Combat. Fans gasped and cried as they saw the champion step back, and put one leg on the floor.


The attacker had to step back himself and catch his breath, leaving his defenses wide open. “Okay… Now I’m tired…”

“Well I’m not!” Hitmonchan sprung back up and used a Close Combat of his own, using all of his energy available to defeat the doppelganger.


“KNOCK! OUT!” The fainted fake Hitmonchan reverted back into a Ditto, and at the right time, too.

“HERE’S the traitor you’re looking for!” A Bisharp ran onto the scene to direct some police Mightyena to the perpetrator.

“What?! No! Not into the cell! It… Ah…“ Ditto shut his eyes and began to snore.

A sneaky Breloom put the blob to sleep with Spore, and the Mightyena dragged him away with his mouth.

The crowd of Pokémon slowly began to walk away and continue with their normal everyday lives.

Only Throh, Hitmonchan, and Lilligant had left. Throh spouted out the best possible ending statement to such an epic occurance. “All’s well that ends well right? Right?”

“Meh. Today felt too long. I’d rather go back and playing video games.” Lilligant complained.

“Hitmonchan? What do you think?”

Hitmonchan had fallen on the floor, fainted from exhaustion.

“I’ll take that as a ‘right.’”
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Catcher of Ubers
Okay, I'm here! Many apologies for the delay I haven't had a chance to get on this site in a while. I caught up with the last couple of chapters and was not disappointed! The whole Ditto Escapade (or Metamon Mishap!) was both hilarious and exciting! Really creative how you had it change forms and turn into so many different tough Pokemon! Hitmonchan vs. Hitmonchan kinda reminded me of the "Dark Link" fights in the Zelda games.

Hitmonchan, who was waking up from a dream about snow tigers, pushed himself to reach the door.

A very random but awesome dream it sounds like! I hope one day I have a dream as great as that.

“AAAAAG!” Super Macho Machamp, who was getting a back massage from a Gardevoir in his secret pad, screamed in agony.

“What is it sir? Am I doing it too hard?”

“Oh nothing… I just feel like someone’s impersonating my macho-awesomeness… And isn’t doing a very good job of doing it! Anyhow, back to my massage… Ooh… Ooh… OOOOOOH! Now that’s what I’m talking about!”

Wow, this may be the funniest scene in the entire story so far!

Donphan took a heavy hit by Lilligant from behind him, who had used Giga Drain to suck the life out of the Ground type, and recover some health back. Heavily injured, the Donphan collapse on its side.

“Nice one Lil! How did you grow so strong?”

“I grew up in the ghetto part of town- a strong fighting strategy is crucial for surviving even a month where I lived.”

Chan has a feisty girl! He better be sure not to get her mad.

Throh spouted out the best possible ending statement to such an epic occurance. “All’s well that ends well right? Right?”

Ah, good 'ol Throh!

“Meh. Today felt too long. I’d rather go back and playing video games.” Lilligant compained.

"complained" is spelled wrong here.

Once again, great work and keep it up!