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Pokemon Eternal (Pg 13)

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
This is a story based on fire red and leaf green. I know many other people have done this before but I tried to make it original. I tried to describe the surroundings and the atmoshere as much as i could.


New Journey, Old Friends

Bulbasaur………………………Charmander……………………..Squirtle……………These three words sped round Seth Dazai’s head as he slept…Which one would he choose?....He liked all three…He had always liked the fire type……but he also loved the looks of Squirtle and its evolutions……And then there was Bulbasaur………Seth………He heard something calling his name………Seth………there it was again……He then saw the source of the voice………It was……It was………A huge blood covered face appeared in front of him and he woke up……

“AAAAGH!” Seth bolted upright.

“Heh heh, sorry little bro. You weren’t waking up. Had to get Gengar here to use Dream Eater. Hope it didn’t scare you.” A tall blurred image of Seth’s older brother, Jace, stood over him. Seth rubbed his eyes and the image slowly came into focus. Standing next to Jace was a strong looking Gengar grinning evilly.

“O no, you only gave me a heart attack, but don’t worry, I get them all the time” Seth said sarcastically, slumping back into bed and pulling his covers over his head.

“Whoa! No you don’t. You’ve gotta get to Prof. Oak’s.” said Jace. “You need to go and get your first pokemon today.” Jace’s only reply was a loud snore coming from underneath the covers

“Sigh. Gengar use Dream Eater.”


After being woken up three more times by Gengar’s Dream Eater, Seth Dazai finally got out of bed. He pulled his cupboard doors open and looked around for some clothes. He eventually pulled out red vest, with short navy blue sleeves and black shirt for underneath, blue jeans, and an official pokemon league hat which his brother had brought for him from Indigo Plateau. Immediately after changing Seth dashed down the stairs tripping over a large pink Nidorino, which belonged to his mother, who was lying at the foot of the staircase.

“Goddammit Spyke! Find somewhere else to sleep!” yelled the teenager. He stepped over the Nidorino and ran into the kitchen.

Inside the kitchen Seth’s mother was busy making Seth’s breakfast, by her side was a blue Nidorina who was happily helping Seth’s mother.

“Morning Mum” said Seth. “Morning Toxi.” The Nidorina smiled happily up at him.

“Good morning Seth. Would you mind taking out the food for Jace’s pokemon?” asked Seth’s mum cheerfully. She was around mid forties but looked about thirty. Seth nodded and dragged the large bag, which contained all the different pokemons favourite food, to the backyard.

Outside Jace was sitting on a garden chair, while all his pokemon were running around enjoying the warm weather. Except Jace’s Blastoise who came up to Seth to help with the heavy bag.

“O, thanks Blastoise” said Seth.

<No problem little man> replied Blastoise grinning.
Blastoise placed the bag down carefully and waited patiently for Seth to pour out his food. Seth grabbed six bowls from inside the bag and six different cans of pokemon food. He opened the first can which had a large face of a Blastoise on it; Seth poured it into the largest of the bowls.

<’Bout bloody time> said Blastoise who was still grinning to himself.

<Your telling me> a large unicorn trotted over to Seth and Blastoise, Blastoise, however was already stuffing his face with the pokefood, instead of a hairy mane, this unicorn had a fiery one which burned brightly.

“Hey Rapidash, I guess you want yours too now huh?” he said stroking the female unicorn gently.

<Indeed> she replied. Seth poured out the Rapidash’s spicy food, and four more pokemon walked up to get their own breakfast.

Seth happily gave each pokemon an individual meal: a dry meal for Sandslash, a sour meal for Gengar, a sweet meal for Vileplume and a bitter meal for Hypno. Each pokemon thanked him in turn and stuffed their faces, except for Gengar who had more fun lobbing his food at Vileplume who kept on producing a horrible odour.


Back inside the kitchen Seth had started his own breakfast, while his mum was doing something in the living room.

After finishing his breakfast Seth’s mum re-appeared from the living room, followed closely by Spyke and Toxi, in her hands she held a yellow bag which she handed to him upon entering the kitchen.

“Here you are Seth, it’s for your journey, I packed it with everything that you’ll need: sleeping bag, tooth brush, a few potions and five pokeballs.” She quickly hugged her son.

“It’s going to be so lonely here with you starting your pokemon journey and your brother heading off to Johto.”

“Don’t worry Mum. I’ll call you as soon as I get to Viridian”. He said smiling.

“Promise?” she asked.

“Promise” he said.

“O gosh! It’s already ten minutes to nine! You better get going, you’re supposed to be there at nine.”

“O ****! Whoops, sorry Mum. Ok bye, love you!” and he raced out the door.


Seth had been walking for five minutes now; he would be late if he kept walking at this pace.

“WHY DID PROFESSOR OAK HAVE TO LIVE AT THE VERY TOP OF THE STEEPEST HILL IN PALLET TOWN!!!” yelled Seth. Suddenly he heard a load galloping off in the distance behind him; he turned around and saw a magnificently bright light speeding towards.

“WHOOOOO!!!!” he yelled. “Hurry up Rapidash!!! I’m going to be late!!!” the incredibly fast Rapidash soon caught up with him and motioned for him to climb on her back, he did so, and they set off.

“So why are you here!” he had to yell to hear himself over the loud galloping.

<Your brother heard that you were running late, so he sent me to get you there faster.>

“WHAT?!?!?!?!?”

<O never mind, look we’re already here.> She slowed down and stopped exactly outside Prof. Oak’s lab.

“Thanks Rapidash, I owe you one.”

<Hardly, I do believe you were the one who fed me this morning.> She replied.

<Oh, and this is from your brother.> She motioned to a small parcel that was tied round her neck with a thin string. Seth carefully pulled it over her head and untied it; it contained a mechanical map which showed all the towns and villages of Kanto.

“Wow, send my thanks to Jace,” he hugged the Rapidash round the neck as if saying goodbye and the fiery unicorn rode off back down the hill.

“Well, here it goes” Seth nervously walked up to Prof. Oak’s front door and knocked loudly, his heart was racing.

What if the pokemon he wanted was already taken? What if Oscar and Terra had already chosen their starters? What if there were no pokemon left for him? Ok that was a stupid question, there were three pokemon to choose from and only three people leaving today, of course there would be one for him. Oh ****! I haven’t decided which one to choose yet!!


Inside the lab Professor Oak had just finished feeding the three starter pokemon. He had to make sure they looked and felt perfect for when their new trainers got here.

He had raised them all from eggs, bred them to be the best that they could be. He had done this especially for his Grandson, Oscar, today he was getting his first pokemon, and he needed to make sure that no matter which pokemon he chose he would feel he made the right decision.

There was a loud knock on the door.

“Ah, the first trainer has arrived. I hope they’re ready for this” he looked out the window into his back yard the three starters were playing with a very friendly Dragonite.

“Come in!” he shouted.


“Come in!” came a voice from inside the lab.

Seth gently opened the oak door and stepped into the house. There were many photos of trainers and their pokemon hung up on the walls. These had been previous Pallet trainers, he saw a picture of his brother with a small Squirtle sitting on his shoulder; both of them were smiling.

“Ah Seth, I thought it was you” a greying man had just entered the room; he was wearing his usual lab coat.

“Hello Professor Oak” he said “I-I’m here to get my pokemon.”

“Yes of course. Come this way, I just let them out recently to play in the backyard.” He motioned for Seth to follow him.


Seth couldn’t believe his eyes when he walked into the garden; it was hardly a garden at all, more like a field. As far as Seth could tell, it was filled with every non-legendary pokemon in Kanto.

“Wow Professor! This is amazing” yelled Seth, his eyes sparkling.

“Ha-ha! That’s what your brother said too”

“So…Where are they?”

“Oh yes! Sorry. Forgot what I was doing for a second there.” Seth sweatdropped.

“Charmander! Squirtle! Bulbasaur!” bellowed Prof. Oak. Four pokemon came running around the side of the house.

“Umm…Professor, Why are there two Squirtles?”

“Hmm, I’m guessing that one of them is a Ditto. But which one?” he tickled one of the Squirtles on the shell, it fell to the ground giggling.

“This one is the real Squirtle. He is very ticklish” he picked up the giggling Squirtle. “Off you go Ditto.” The Ditto looked sad that its little game was already over and turned back into its original body before storming off.

“So, which pokemon do you want to choose?”

Seth eyes all three pokemon: the Bulbasaur was falling asleep on the spot, the Charmander was fingering the fire on its tail and the Squirtle was still giggling.

“I pick……” Seth was cut off by a load voice; it was getting louder and louder.

“What the hell is that?” asked Seth; his question was immediately answered as a young girl burst through the backdoor and collided with him, knocking them both to the floor. Her white hat and his red were thrown from them landing on top of each other next to the STILL giggling Squirtle.

“Oh! Sorry Seth! Didn’t see you there” she picked herself up from on top of him and brushed the dirt off of her blue top and red skirt. Seth just blushed; he had fancied Terra since she first came to Pallet three years ago.

Prof. Oak handed both of them their hats back.

“OK, so Seth as you were saying” said Oak.

“Right. I choose…” he eyed the pokemon again “Charmander.” The Charmander was too pre-occupied with the flame on his tail to notice that he had just been chosen.

“Oh, but that’s what I wanted” moaned Terra, Seth felt guilty about this.

“Well you still have to choose one Terra” said Oak. Terra walked up to the giggling Squirtle and picked him up.

“Ooh! She’s so cute, I’ll take he-” Squirtle finally stopped giggling and scowled at Terra.

Before she could even finish her sentence she was drenched from head to toe with a Water Gun from the scowling Squirtle. She retaliated by kicking the little Squirtle over the house.

“TAKE THAT YOU LITTLE MONSTER!!!! WHAT KIND OF GIRL DOES THAT!?!?!?!?!?” Seth and Oak sweatdropped.

“O well, I guess I’ll take Bulbasaur then!” She smiled at the little pokemon and it sweatdropped.

“OK so Seth chose Charmander and Terra chose Bulbasaur. So that means Oscar gets Squirtle…if we ever find Squirtle that is”

“Its OK Gramps, I already found him.” They spun round to see a boy wearing a black polo neck and purple trousers. He had a small shell tucked under his arm.

“Oscar!” said Oak cheerfully. “You finally got up then?”

“Yeah, and since when could Squirtles fly?”


Back inside Oaks lab the three Trainers and their pokemon were waiting for Prof. Oak to come back with a special present for the three of them.

“Bulbasaur, you need a good nickname. How about Razor or Leafy” the Bulbasaur sweatdropped.

“How obvious are those, at least think of something original.” Sneered Oscar.

“If you’re so good with nicknames what did you call that monster of yours!” she yelled. Luckily for her Squirtle was snoozing on Oscar’s lap, so he didn’t hear her call him a girl again.

“Don’t be stupid. I don’t give pokemon nicknames; I don’t see the point in it.”

“WHAT!?!? You’re not giving her a nickname?” she stared at Oscar. “Nicknames are great! Aren’t they Seth” Both of Seth’s friends gazed at him waiting for them to take their side.

“Umm…Yeah, I think they’re great too, I-I’m definitely giving Charmander one…” he smiled nervously at them.

“Ha! See!” Terra stuck her tongue out at Oscar childishly. “So what’re you gonna call him?”

“Umm…I dunno…Pyro?...You know cos he plays with his tail flame a lot.” The little Charmander smiled up at Seth.

<I like that name, it sounds nice.>

“Glad you like it little buddy.” Oscar and Terra gawped at Seth.

“You…you can understand him already?” questioned Oscar, his mouth still wide open.

“Why? Can’t you?”

“Of course not, we’ve only just got them.”

“Well Oscar, he is around pokemon more than us.”

“Maybe…” Oscar put on a funny face when he thought hard, now was one of those times.

Oscar’s thoughts were interrupted by Oak re-joining the trio. He handed each of them a red mechanical device.

“This is a Pokedex; it records data on pokemon when you catch them. I want you three to use these to help on your journey. They can tell you which pokemon to find where, how to tell when a pokemon is near to evolving and you can even use it videophone someone by downloading their trainer card into the Pokedex.” He smiled cheerfully at them.

“Now get going your pokemon adventure is about to begin.” The trio walked out the doors of Prof. Oaks house and began they journey as pokemon trainers.


THE END

Hope you all enjoyed it and i hope someone replys (No. of times i've spent ages on a fic and no-ones replied.) grrrr

SD ;006;
 
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Shadows Follower

Well-Known Member
I actually enjoyed that. No spelling mistakes I could see or wrong use of puncutation. The description was nice and there was even some comedy as well. At the moment it doesn't seem any different from other trainer fics but I'll still continue to read. I hope you put up the next chapter soon.
 

Leon

Well-Known Member
it was hardly a field at all, more like a field
pretty sure ya mean garden on the first one.
apart from that noother mistakes, good description, nice personalities on the characters. keep up the good work!
~Leon~
 

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
lol thanks for reading it guys!!!

Shadows Follower: thanks, my next chapter will be up sometime this week hopefully, if not it will be up on sunday.

Leon: Whoops! Yeah it was supposed to be garden, thanks for pointing that out, I'll edit it now :D
 

Leon

Well-Known Member
No problem SuperDude, cant wait to see what chappie 2 is like, any chance of a spoiler??
 

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
Ok spoiler it is.

Preview:

Fiery Rage, A Family Betrayel:

After getting their first pokemon Seth, Terra and Oscar head home to show their families their pokemon. Seth's family is appauled by his first choice as his family have a history of being water trainers. Jace battles Seth with his Johto starter to prove that water is the best pokemon...
 

HB5squared

I'm Back
After getting their first pokemon Seth, Terra and Oscar head home to show their families their pokemon. Seth's family is appauled by his first choice as his family have a history of being water trainers. Jace battles Seth with his Johto starter to prove that water is the best pokemon...

WEll if I read the next chapter and this is exactly what happens with no other changes what so ever, I will be angry! I dislike when people ruin fics with spoilers*growls* please don't do this :)
 

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
Lol nope, thats not just whats going to happen. Plus, i might get my next chapter up today. If not it'll be tommorow :D
 

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
Chapter Two :D

Yeah i know, about time, sorry I was sick, had no energy. Well at least its here now eh?

Fiery Rage, a Family Betrayal

Seth Dazai, one of the three new Pallet town trainers was walking down a very large and steep hill. Ten minutes ago, he and his two friends had just received their first pokemon of off the famous Prof. Oak. He had chosen Charmander. That was a bad choice in his eyes, although he loved fire type pokemon, his family had a history of being water trainers, his cousin, Misty, was the Gym Leader in Cerulean City and his uncle , Juan, was the Gym Leader in Sootopolis City. Even his mother, she had been the old Cerulean City Gym Leader but had passed it onto Misty after Jace had left to start his pokemon journey.

He was walking slightly behind his two friends, he was dreading going home. His two friends were walking side by side arguing about nicknaming pokemon; both of their pokemon were walking next to their trainer’s sweatdropping.

Seth’s Charmander, which he had nicknamed Pyro, was sleeping on Seth’s shoulders, its tail flame slightly tickling his ear.

“Just give her a bloody nickname!” yelled Terra. Terra was a very pretty girl, and you wouldn’t find a boy who would deny that. Seth had a crush on her since she moved to Pallet three years ago.

“Why?! It’s pointless!” shouted Oscar. Oscar was Seth’s best friend; they met in their first year at Pokemon School. Oscar had kept bringing things over to see if Seth would eat them, and he always did.

“Just do it!”

“Fine! But I’m warning you, I suck at nicknames” he put on his funny thinking face.

“Hurry up!”

“Shut up, I’m thinking. Anyway you haven’t nicknamed Bulbasaur yet.”

“Yes I have, his names Nerio after the God of fertility” she stuck her tongue out at him. “Why don’t you call her Monster? She is one.” The little Squirtle didn’t hear her call him a girl again as he was busy listening to Oscar’s Mp3 player.

“No, he needs a good nickname.” Oscar emphasised on the he.

“Call him Hydra” Oscar and Terra jumped, they had forgotten that Seth was behind them.

“Yeah, OK, that’s better thank anything I could think of, and it’s better than Monster.” Said Oscar.

“Its not very feminine though is it”


After about ten minutes the three pre-teens finally made it home.

“OK, we’ll all meet outside Seth’s house in five minutes” said Oscar. Although Oscar was only a few months older than Seth and Terra, he had always acted like the big brother; it was just in his nature.

“Right” said Seth and Terra together; they all returned their pokemon and headed off in different directions.


“Mum! I’m back” Seth’s yell echoed through the house.

“We’re in the living room honey” his mum replied. Seth took of his shoes and headed to the living room. Inside his mum and brother were sitting on the sofa playing with a small blue crocodile with red scales on its back.

“Hey Seth, like my new Totodile” Jace grinned at his brother.

“You got it already! But I left before you” yelled Seth shocked. Jace chortled.

“I flew over on Bubbles” Bubbles was the families Pelipper. She was present from Uncle Juan to Seth’s mum after Jace was born. They had to get a license to bring her over though as she was a foreign pokemon.

“Your Totodile’s nice by the way”

“Oh yeah I almost forgot, lets see your Squirtle then” Jace smiled at his brother.

“Yes let’s see it Seth” Seth started sweating like mad.

“Why do you want to see it for, it’s not like you’ve never seen a Squirtle” he smiled nervously.

“I just want to examine it to make sure it’s in good shape” he smiled again.

“Well, actually I kinda ummm…” he was sweating like made now “chose Charmander instead.”

“What!” both his mum and his brother yelled at him.

“What were you thinking? What’s your uncle going to say? What’s your father going to say?” yelled his mum. Seth’s father was also a very experienced water trainer; he worked in Sootopolis Gym with his brother.

“Why the hell did you choose Charmander? It’s pathetic, my Totodile would thrash it in a battle” as he said that the little Totodile waddled up to Seth and bit him on the leg.

“Get off you little ****!” he yelled and kicked the Totodile across the living room, narrowly missing Toxi who was sleeping by the TV.

“I chose Charmander because I prefer fire types to water types!”

“Battle me” said Jace.

“What? No way, I won’t stand a chance, your way more experienced.”

“One on one, Totodile versus Charmander. If I lose I’ll give you a pokemon, if you lose you give back the Town Map I gave you.”

“Deal”


Outside in the garden the two brothers stood opposite each other, both of their pokemon standing next to their trainer.

“Go Pyro” the fire lizard jumped forward.

“Get him Totodile, use water gun!” the blue crocodile leapt into the air and blasted water at the unsuspecting Charmander. It hit him square on knocking him backwards.

“Pyro get him back with an ember” Pyro just shrugged at him.

<How?>

“Seth you only just got him, he doesn’t know how to use ember yet!”

“Then how come your Totodile can use water gun already?”

“Because I trained him beforehand against Toxi and Spyke” he nodded towards the two poison pokemon who were lying next to the boys mum; she was sitting on the porch on a cushioned garden chair.

“OK then Pyro use scratch” Pyro leapt forward and cut Totodile deeply in the stomach; it fell backwards into Jace.

“Get him again before he gets up” Pyro ran towards the Totodile his claws behind him ready to hit its mark.

“Water gun quickly!” but before Totodile could react Pyro stuck him again knocking him unconscious.

“Yeah! Go Pyro!” cheered a voice from behind, Seth spun around to see his friends standing side by side. Oscar had his arms crossed over his chest. Terra was jumping up and down; her little Bulbasaur was sweatdropping slightly.

Seth winked at them and stuck his thumb up. Pyro ran up to him and jumped into his arms.

<How was that?> asked Pyro.

“Not bad little buddy” replied Seth “Don’t get too cocky about it though.”

“Here Seth” Jace stuck out his hand and offered his brother a white and red ball. Seth grabbed the ball and threw it up in the air.

“Yes, I got…Wait, what pokemon is it?”

“It’s a water pokemon and that’s all I’m going to say” Jace smiled at his little brother. “Promise me that you won’t open it until you get to Pewter, OK?” Seth nodded to show that he understood.

“Why’s that?” he asked.

“Can’t say”

“Why’s that?”

“I just can’t”

“Is that because you can’t or you won’t”

“Shut up”


After saying goodbye to his family again, Seth and his friends finally left their home town. There was a lot more grass outside of Pallet and definitely a lot more wild pokemon, although most of them were Ratatta’s.

“Where are all the bloody Pidgey’s, their supposed to be common” and just as Oscar finished speaking a large drop of poo fell from the tree above him onto his shoulder. He looked up to see a very happy looking Pidgey.

“Hey Pidgey nice shot!” yelled Terra, the little Pidgey smiled down at her.

“Go Hydra!” Oscar opened up his pokeball and a white beam came out, the beam took shape and Squirtle appeared.

“Tackle the tree Hydra!”

<……Seriously?”

“Yes seriously now do it!” Hydra shrugged and then charged forward and smacked into the tree, the little Pidgey lost its balance and fell onto Oscar’s head.

“Ow! Pokeball go!” Oscar dropped a pokeball onto the Pidgey which was now at his feet. The ball rocked once, twice, three times and there was a loud ding from the ball.

“Simple” said Oscar grinning “Come on out Pidgey!” the little bird looked in shock, its feathers were ruffled and its eyes were wide.

“Aw, poor little thing” Terra picked up the Pidgey and cuddled him tightly.

“Don’t kill him then”

“Shut up Oscar! It’s called affection!” she growled. “So, what are you going to nickname him?”

“I dunno, Felix?” shrugged Oscar.

<Call him Booby!> yelled Hydra.

“Booby? Felix sounds better Hydra. From now on I don’t think you should choose any nicknames.” Seth said sweatdropping.

“Good idea, return Hydra, return Booby, I mean Felix!” the two pokemon returned to their balls.

“Look guys!” Terra pointed to the distance “Pokemon Centre!” she grabbed her two friends by their collars and dragged them off towards the PokeCentre.

THE END


Hoped you all enjoyed it, sorry it wasn't that good but i kinda rushed it.
 
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Leon

Well-Known Member
pretty good, although it did seem a little rushed, any hints as to what what the pokemon may be that jace gave to seth, maybe a[SPOIL]Mudkip[/SPOIL]??
 

Leon

Well-Known Member
oh well, i kinda thought [Spoil]Mudkip[/Spoil], due to Juan being Seth's uncle, but[Spoil]Psyduck[/Spoil] makes sense with misty being his cousin
 

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
The reason i didn't make it a [SPOIL]mudkip[/SPOIL] was because it was one of Jace's old pokemon and as he hasen't even been to [SPOIL]hoenn[/SPOIL] yet its hardly possible, i should have explained that earlier.
 

Leon

Well-Known Member
ah rite, still[Spoil]psyduck[/Spoil] should be quite good, with the psychic capabilities.
 

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
Yep that was the point, and also cos of something that happened to seth with its evolution, and he fell in love with them, well not quite but you know
 

Shadows Follower

Well-Known Member
Nice new chapter Superdude. I like the background behind Seth and his family. I must admit, don't try to give away too much off the story before the next chapter is up as it doesn't leave any surprise.
 

Mudskipper

The Earthquaker
Did you read my post in the old thread? Sweatdropping does not exist! Also, the paragraphs are a bit too short. You could lengthen a few paragraphs to add some substance to the story.
 

SuperDude

Well-Known Member
thanks everyone all *counts* three of you :D ok i'll take that into mind, but i can't think of any other way of expressing that kind of thing (sweatdropping in real form) but i wouldn't mind a few good points from you either, its all so negative

SD;006;
 
N

NoDayBut2Day

Guest
So far this is ok. ONe thing that is over done is the starters, just make sure to make them interesting with good personalitys. I really liked the part where Terra kicked the Squirtle, it was random, funny, but kind of mean lol. Length is decent and description is ok. Its a nice start. The nicknames are cute too. Ill def keep reading and give a full review next time. I like to wait a chapter or so before I give a full out one.

-Danny
 

Mudskipper

The Earthquaker
No, no, no, I don't mean for it to sound negative. It's just constructive criticism, that's all. I am simply giving you hints to help your story along a little. The best authors are those who listen to others' suggestions.

For sweatdropping, you could make it say that he or she was thinking "What the heck...?" or simply "...?" or even that the character was looking at them strangely. Or you could eliminate the 'sweatdropping' altogether.

I like your story, I really do, but...try to give your readers something original once in a while, you know, to make it seem like this isn't some ordinary trainer fic. You could add some humor or a brief scene of something happening elsewhere that is related to the main plot (an example would be a scene featuring Team Rocket in the anime). Make your fic stand out from the other trainer fics. Give your readers a reason to spend their time reading this fic. Add something that truly makes this your own and something to be proud of. Make this fic live up to the uber coolness of its title.

(Was that positive enough for you? :D)
 
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