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Pokemon Eternal Quest

Boonge

Cascade Trainer
Well i've decided to start my trainer fic hope you like it.


Pokemon Eternal Quest

When you become the best,
You complete all the challenges,
Then there is none left,
You get bored,
And have to make a challenge of your own!



Chapter 1: Unforgettable Beggining


In Altering Cave stood a boy who was the age of 16.

The boy wore a red cap, a blue dirty t-shirt and blue ripped jeans.

This was Ash Ketchum the champion of Pokemon he had all 24 gym badges, all 7 symbols and the reigning champion of all regions known as Kanto, Johto and Hoen.

He stood there like a statue.

Altering Cave was quiet not even a peep could be heard no pokemon, nothing was in there except Ash.

The only objects there was, was hard rocks.

"It's all to easy." Ash muttered to himself.

"No challenges left to accomplish."

"Now it's boring not fun."

"No real challenge or trainer even near getting close."

Ash reached into his pokebelt and grabbed out a red and white pokeball.

"GO Charizard!" Ash threw the pokeball into the air.

Charizard formed onto the ground.

It flapped its two big wings, it had two arms with sharp claws, two horns that firmly stood on it's head, massive powerfull legs and it's almight tail which was burning a bright flame on the tip.

<Charrrr!> growled the Charizard.

"Charizard take me to Pallet Town." Ash said to his trusty Charizard.

<Cha.> Charizard nodded.

Ash hopped onto the Charizard's back and got a firm grip and in a matter of seconds they were soaring high above the ground.

They flied over caves, rivers, building and grassy fields.

Then they made a landing at a place that was very quiet and almost entirely covered with grass and flowers.

"Thanks, Charizard RETURN!" Ash smiled politely.

Charizard dissapeared into the pokeball.

Ash started to walk towards a big building.

This was the famous Professor Oak's Lab.

It had a big backyard where all the pokemon would stroll around.

Machines on the roof for recording pokemon data.

Ash walked up the stairs and opened the door and there stood Professor Oak.

"Oh, Hello Ash what brings you back here in Pallet Town?" Professor Oak asked.

"Well the thing is professor there is nothing left for me to do no challenges left, trainer after weak trainers challenge me."

"I want a challenge." complained Ash.

"Well theres nothing i can do to help you maybe you should make yourself a challenge." Oak smirked with a smart look on his face.

Professor Oak usually wore a Lab coat, brown pants, sandles and glasses.

He also had bright white hair.

"But how-"

"Sorry Ash got to go its time for me to feed the pokemon." Oak smiled and walked off towards a little room.

Ash walked out of the Lab and went to a nice little park and sat on a wooden bench.

He saw the grass swaying side to side.

The trees rustling.

The kids versing each other in battles.

Then suddenly his brown eyes caught the sight of a young boy who was all by himself playing with two toy soliders.

"THATS IT!" Ash smiled.

Ash walked over to the boy.

"Hello my name's Ash whats your's?" Ash questioned the little kid.

"Wow! Your Ask Ketchum sign my shirt!" The kid screeched.

Ash fell anime style.

"Oh and my names Matt." Matt smiled.

"How old are you Matt?"

"9 turning 10 tommorow."

"Well Happy Birthday for tommorow see you i got to go."

Ash walked of with a smile on his face he had an idea but what was this idea?

Matt continued to play with his toy soliders.

Suddenly a kid approached him.

"Well im 10 today and i got my pokemon." smirked the kid.

This kid wore a yellow shirt and black pants with a green cap.

He was of a much bigger size of Matt more bulky and taller.

"I don't care Sam." Matt said.

"Well you should because you're not getting one your parents wont let you." smirked Sam.

"SHUT UP!" yelled Matt.

"When will you learn get some manners respect your elders." snorted Sam.

"Your only 1 day older than me." Matt replied.

"My point is proven then hey?" Sam said.

Matt ignored Sam and started to walk away towards his house.

Sam shuved Matt's face into a pile of mud.

"Let that be a warning Matthew." Sam giggled.

Sam walked back off towards the park.

Matt wipped of the mud with his shirt and walked home lonely and angrily.

Matt opened the door and there stood his Mum.

"What the hell!" screamed Matt's mum.

"Why is your face covered with mud." yelled Mat's mum at the top of her lungs.

Matt's mum wore a pink apron, pink bandana, pink t-shirt and black plain tracsuit pants.

"Never mind you wont understand." Matt replied.

"Now tell me young man." Matt's mum blocked his path.

"A kid pushed me into a pile OF MUD!" Matt sobbed.

Matt bursted into tears and ran to his room which was covered with pokemon posters.

Matt's tears trickelled down his pale face.

He was getting bullied, and his parents were not going to let him have a pokemon for his 10th birthday.

Matt went to bed annoyed and fell asleep with tears on the blanket.

Matt awoke from his long sleep and brushed aside his blanket.

He walked down stairs angrily.

"Son you being angry is'nt going to change a thing your not getting a pokemon."

This was Matt's dad he worked for Silph Co.

He wore grey pants, and a black jacket he had brown hair and wore white runners.

"I want my son to become a scientest not some stinky pokemon trainer." Matt's mum snorted.

Matt sat down at the breakfast table and ate his toast and gulped his orange juice.

He walked outta the house and started to walk.

"This is it im going to make a run for it." Matt mumbled to himself

Matt started to bolt towards the open field of grass that led to Viridian City.

"Where do you think your going?" Sam appeared once more.

"You don't have your own pokemon there for you are not permitted to go into pokemon areas." Smirked Sam proudly.

Matt did'nt even bother to reply he started to walk towards home again

Maybe im not supposed to be a pokemon trainer,

Maybe it's not my fate,

Everything points out that it is'nt my fate,

Maybe i should just give up at least i tried.

Matt thought in his head sadly.

Matt went back home and played his game console for about half an hour.

Suddenly someone knocked on the door.

Matt ran to the door and it was Ash.

His farther opened the door.

His mouth wide open in shock

"Hey your that idiot so called champion trainer." Matt's farther said digustingly.

"Hi im Ash Ketchum ive got to ask you somthing." Ash smiled.

"And whats that?" snorted Matt's farther.

"I would like to accomopany your son on a pokemon journey so i could be his mentor."

"Phhhhht not in a million years." smirked Matt's farther.

"I'll give you 70000 P" Ash smiled.

"And you'll be able to see your son every month and for quater of the year every day."

"DEAL!" smiled Matt's farther.

Matt was shocked-

"I'd do anything to get rid of this brat for a while."

-Matt fell anime style.

Ash handed over the money to the farther.

Matt's parents said there goodbyes and Ash and Matt were off.

"So Ash your gonna train me to be a great pokemon trainer?" Matt smiled at Ash.

"Yep and oooh i forgot."

Ash grabbed a pokeball out of his backpack and gave it to Matt.

"A POKEMON FOR ME!?!" Matt yelled with excitement he was overjoyed he was jumping around overjoyed.

"Why dont you see whats inside."

"Okay umm...Go POKEBALL!"

Matt fell like he had fallan into his dreams.

Then out of the pokeball formed a pokemon that looked like a lizard, it had a round head, two stubby arms and legs it was coloured orange and its stomach was a creamy type colour and last but no least its little tail that had a little flame on the tip.

"COOOOOOOOOL" Matt yelled.

He ran towards the Charmander and patted it on the head.

<Charrr> The little Charmander smiled.

"Now that pokemon hatched out of it's egg yesterday so it's still a baby and is weaker than your average Charmander." Ash pointed out.

"What did you say? I was'nt listening i was playing with Charmander."

Ash fell anime style.



xXXXx


Hope you like it.

The storyline thickens in the next couple of chapters.

Please review and Please Rate
 
Last edited:

Air Dragon

Ha, ha... not.
okaaay, let me be honest with you... the idea's not too shabby but you've got to work on your spelling/punctuation , paragraphing and description to really make this fanfiction shine. Piling everything into one large dollop doesn't truthfully help with following the general plot. Let's review each of these areas:

Spelling- From line one there were mistakes like Beggining, tracsuit, farther and all those shortened negatives (such as hasn't, isn't, etc.) .pls try using a word processor like MS Word to clear these niggling problems up.

Paragraphing- DON'T be so eager to put a lot of spaces to boost your chapter length. let the double spacing occur only in between paragraphs, ok? join your sentences to make constructive paragraphs. pls don't let your sentences hang. Don't worry if your chapters start out a little short, you can develop chapter length in subsequent ones. everybody starts out fresh, so don't worry. just let it flow in a waythat reader can see it as though it unfolds before their eyes on a large, 40" TV...heh,heh.

Description- being indirect can draw any reader's interest deeper. The weather, landscape, the cast's emotions and thoughts...let us see everything and anything, even the abstract and inanimate. Try to look at the scene in your mind and write about that before moving into the people or pokemon there. for example:

Water dripped from the large stalactites which hung from the cavernous roof, creating a discordant yet somewhat soothing melody. Together with the stalagmites and poor lighting, this gave Altering Cave the appearance and feel of an enormous, heavily-fanged and salivating beast's mouth. The terrifying effect, whilst probably keeping all pokemon away (or so it seemed as not one could be found) seemed to have no effect on a tall, dark haired boy who stood stock still amongst the cold, wet rocks. His hands in the pockets of his dirty jean pockets, his dark eyes rested on nothing in particular; their unfocussed appearance almost gave the impression that he was a genius lost in thought. Thought, however was far from Ash Ketchum's mind, as he stared into his future which looked as bleary as the cave around him...for genius as he undoubtably was, he wasn't the thinker sort, nor was he strictly a genius at careful thinking (not most of the time...)

Ash had it all; the respect of the league authorities of Hoenn, Kanto and Johto, that of the Frontier Brains (the strongest trainers in the amusement park known as the Battle Frontier), and that of the general pokemon world public at large as an undisputed pokemon master...

Something like that. Since Ash is someone we all know (and may or may not love), we know he has Pikachu by his side or on his head or shoulder at all times and that charizard, while respecting Ash a great deal, doesn't miss the opportunity to playfully scorch him with a flamethrower. keep the traits we know or that distinguish trainers we know about there, alright?

Matt's parents were a little too demanding, it was a little unreal to me that his mom would be so pushy. and as for his dad only wanting to get rid of him for 70000P is just plain mean...meh.

Also when describing items and pokemon, act like every reader is a (forgive my expression) total noob. let even one who has little grasp on the concept of pokeballs and the like get a general idea of what they do, waht their like, etc, etc.

just sit down, think the story through and try again. it's your first shot, so i'll give it a 2.5/5. keep me posted on progress or if you need more tips.

Later!
 
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