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Pokemon: New stories (jirachis wish)
- Thread starter Jackson
- Start date
Sceptile Master
Survivor of the Great Avatar Depression
Were are Team Rocket (the thiefs) teleported? Are they still in Goldenrod city?
Ok I have todays update
Comic17: http://img530.imageshack.us/img530/5827/17nsxv9.png
and pantyer2s comic up date
http://img58.imageshack.us/img58/4212/comic2momsdaynr9qc0.png
They just got teleported to a random city. It doesnt realy matter for the comic.
Comic17: http://img530.imageshack.us/img530/5827/17nsxv9.png
and pantyer2s comic up date
http://img58.imageshack.us/img58/4212/comic2momsdaynr9qc0.png
They just got teleported to a random city. It doesnt realy matter for the comic.
.Bright Side.
~(._.~)
Ok, the comic has a couple of key mistakes you shoudl edit.
First off, the text seems to big for the comic panels to handle. Try unsing the text "Smallfonts" size 7. It will make a lot of room in the comic and give you more room for the characters to move and for the viewers to see. Also, make the textboxes only big enough to give the text breathing room. Your current text boxes are too big and take up space they don't need to use. Also, try making the text boxes more of an rectangle with circular edges. I'm not sure if you use paint or painshop or what, but if you use paint, this should be pretty easy to find. Also, you need to add mroe punctuation/capitilazation in your comics. I've counted a lot of times where you didn't capitilize soemthign or didn't add a period at the end of your sentences. Work on that.
In comic 13#, you mispelled Hyper and put Hipper.
In comic 12#, you mispelled gonna and put gona.
Also, you seem to change up your comic style with the text and other things as the comics progress. I'd suggest finding on ecomic text style and stick wiht it through. One thing you could do is color the text boxes a certain way corresponding to the character, like what he is wearing. Also, the comic jsut doesn't seem very realistic. Not with pokemon, but I mean like how The character ran from the grunts, but the grunts beat them into the city, or atleast got farther than them in. Also, aren't Team Magma, Aqua, and Rockett all distinct rivals? I really don't know why they would work together...
And, WHAT IS THE PLOT? I don't have a clue what the plot is. You're going to random places for no atiquitly explored reason. Why go to Goldenrod? Going thee because the character wanted to shows me that you are running out of ideas and you are rushing the comic. Why did Jackson need a starter? He isn't going off to any gyms or contests, because you haven't showed us that he is. So he got his starter for no reason?
All in all, the comic needs some work.
First off, the text seems to big for the comic panels to handle. Try unsing the text "Smallfonts" size 7. It will make a lot of room in the comic and give you more room for the characters to move and for the viewers to see. Also, make the textboxes only big enough to give the text breathing room. Your current text boxes are too big and take up space they don't need to use. Also, try making the text boxes more of an rectangle with circular edges. I'm not sure if you use paint or painshop or what, but if you use paint, this should be pretty easy to find. Also, you need to add mroe punctuation/capitilazation in your comics. I've counted a lot of times where you didn't capitilize soemthign or didn't add a period at the end of your sentences. Work on that.
In comic 13#, you mispelled Hyper and put Hipper.
In comic 12#, you mispelled gonna and put gona.
Also, you seem to change up your comic style with the text and other things as the comics progress. I'd suggest finding on ecomic text style and stick wiht it through. One thing you could do is color the text boxes a certain way corresponding to the character, like what he is wearing. Also, the comic jsut doesn't seem very realistic. Not with pokemon, but I mean like how The character ran from the grunts, but the grunts beat them into the city, or atleast got farther than them in. Also, aren't Team Magma, Aqua, and Rockett all distinct rivals? I really don't know why they would work together...
And, WHAT IS THE PLOT? I don't have a clue what the plot is. You're going to random places for no atiquitly explored reason. Why go to Goldenrod? Going thee because the character wanted to shows me that you are running out of ideas and you are rushing the comic. Why did Jackson need a starter? He isn't going off to any gyms or contests, because you haven't showed us that he is. So he got his starter for no reason?
All in all, the comic needs some work.
Um...
Yeah you got the grammar right, I thought that Jackson meant to put that there. The plot is that Jackson is finding out about the legends! Don't need to yell. He got a starter like every pokemon person would too! And there are more than one grunts! Sheesh!
Yeah you got the grammar right, I thought that Jackson meant to put that there. The plot is that Jackson is finding out about the legends! Don't need to yell. He got a starter like every pokemon person would too! And there are more than one grunts! Sheesh!
Last edited:
You've obviously not actually read all the comics. If you had read em, you'd have known that he has to get the green mew.
You've obviously not actually read all the comics. If you had read em, you'd have known that he has to get the green mew.
Well... Im back.. most of you dont even remember me by now.. but Im gona start makin comics again... I just got bored last time and.. sorta just fell away from sprites all together... BUT IM BACK BABY!
sorry to all who had a problem when I left..
well here is my first new Comic..
Comic18: http://img337.imageshack.us/img337/39/18nsyf4.png
I hope you like it! I had some fun makin it
sorry to all who had a problem when I left..
well here is my first new Comic..
Comic18: http://img337.imageshack.us/img337/39/18nsyf4.png
I hope you like it! I had some fun makin it
well.. thank you for remembering my comic
I have the update for today.. so I hope you all like.. not very funny.. but ya kinda need it to help the story move along..
Comic19: http://img72.imageshack.us/img72/127/19nswd7.png
Thank you all for your comments...
I have todays comic ready!
I hope you like it!
Comic20: http://img261.imageshack.us/img261/6237/20nspv9.png
I have todays comic ready!
I hope you like it!
Comic20: http://img261.imageshack.us/img261/6237/20nspv9.png
FamousHunter2
I think I'm back?
Ooo Jacksons back
Lil' Jirachi
Shooting Stars
Nice comics. I'll be watching this.