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Pokemon University: Year One

N

Neko Godot

Hey! Listen!
Chapter 1 now up!!

Prologue​

Dr. Ryan Grayson, principal of the Pokemon University, paced his study. His gray hair was as messy as ever as he worried about the events so far. He had been up all night since Vice- Principal Ricter had given him the news. A teacher walked into the study. “sir, they are ready.”

Grayson sighed, and then slowly walked out of his study. There was a buzz in the hallway, as students were gathering. Grayson knew the students’ rumors would all be false. None of them would be anywhere near the truth.

Officer Jenny approached the principal. “We performed the autopsy,” she reported. “It was definitely an Arbok bite.”

“That can only mean that something terrible will soon occur, if she is attacking once again. Are you sure it was an Arbok?” Grayson asked.

“No doubt,” answered Jenny. “We even have a sample of the venom, if you would like to see it.”

“That won’t be necessary. Just take me to the body.”

Jenny and Grayson walked past a few other hallways. The buzz was becoming louder; students were becoming even more worried. They finally arrived at their destination. It was a lump covered in white cloth. Grayson slowly pulled back the white cloth, even though he knew what lay beneath it: the body of one of Pokemon University’s students.

Grayson sighed. “Listen Jenny, I don’t want this to get out. If anyone finds out, the school will be in chaos. Talk about bad PR.” Grayson looked at the bite on the student’s neck. “What a shame that life was stolen from him so early in life. Jenny, you must send your best officers to go searching for her. I know her. She will attack again.”

“Yes sir. Troops have already been deployed. I’m sure we can catch her. It will only take his a day. This is the greatest police force ever.” Jenny saluted Grayson. “Now, if you excuse me, I must leave.”

Grayson waved goodbye. He could still not imagine the events that had happened. As he reflected on the events of the past, he knew what horror waited in the future.
 
Last edited:
S

Sunkern

Well
This definitely caught my attention. I am hooked on whether it really was an Arbok bite, or if something more sinister is going on. Even though just a prologue, it was enough to keep me interested.

My only two critique would be your last paragraph, which contradicts itself- 'He could not imagine the events that would happen' followed by 'He knew what horror waited in the future'.

Aside from that this look very interesting and I'll keep an eye out for the first chapter :)
 
N

Neko Godot

Hey! Listen!
Sunkern said:
This definitely caught my attention. I am hooked on whether it really was an Arbok bite, or if something more sinister is going on. Even though just a prologue, it was enough to keep me interested.

My only two critique would be your last paragraph, which contradicts itself- 'He could not imagine the events that would happen' followed by 'He knew what horror waited in the future'.

Aside from that this look very interesting and I'll keep an eye out for the first chapter :)
Click to expand...
Fixed it. Should have read had happened, not would happen.
 
N

Neko Godot

Hey! Listen!
Chapter 1: School Begins​

Jimmy sat in his desk, bored. Today was his first day at Pokemon University. He had been excited for this the entire morning. He hardly touched his breakfast. He couldn’t wait to get his own pokemon and battle. But now, here he was, sitting at a desk in a room filled with other students, listening to Vice – Principal Ricter lecturing the class on something or other.

“… and after the test you will get your own pokemon.” Jimmy heard this part. He was now as excited as he was back in the morning, and brushed his brown hair out of his eyes as Ricter passed out the test.

“This test will determine the pokemon you will receive. It has nothing to do with knowledge, but with personality. The test will not determine the species of pokemon you get, but the personality. You may begin.”

Jimmy opened his test. The first question: If you were stranded on an island, what would you bring? Jimmy thought about this, but then put his answer: The pokemon I will receive today.

*

As the test continued, Ricter walked into Principal Grayson’s room. Ricter wanted to discuss the events of the previous night. “So, you really think it was Slithra, eh?” he asked the principal.

Grayson took his monocle off, wiped it on his shirt, put it back on, and then responded. “I am absolutely certain it was her. She is fond of snake like pokemon.”

“But why would she kill a student? What would Slithra have to gain by doing that? Nothing, absolutely nothing.”

“There must have been something,” said Grayson. “I know Slithra. She does not like to waste anything. She must have had a motive for attacking that student, she had to. But I fear that she might not show herself again. She likes to use peons to do her work, as she prefers to be the puppet master, hiding in the shadows. But this leads to a bigger question. Our school’s security is so tight, how could she have gotten in?”

*

Jimmy continued the test. He felt no pressure at all, as he did not care what type of pokemon he received. He was a big fan of normal types, but he liked fire types too.

Jimmy glanced at the next question: What legendary pokemon would you like to have? Jimmy thought about it. Mewtwo and Deoxys were strong, but Jirachi could pack a punch also. Finally, he decided on the origin of all pokemon: Mew.

*

“I have a theory as to how Slithra may have gotten in,” said Ricter.

“Oh, and what is that?” queried Grayson. “I’d love to hear it. Any help I could get on finding Slithra would be greatly appreciated.”

“Well, I believe a teacher must have helped Slithra get into the school. Think about it, she would need someone with knowledge about the entire school to help her break in. We find the traitor, and soon we will find Slithra.”

“A brilliant plan,” stated Grayson. “That makes more sense than any other suggestion I heard today.”

“Good. Now listen, I’ll deal with finding the traitor. Don’t you worry about it. After all, I am second in command. But do me a favor; can you assign the new kids their pokemon? I feel like relaxing and enjoying a nice bottle of white wine after last night.”

“I can’t believe that you would do that!” said Grayson.

“What, not assign the kids their pokemon?”

“No, I was talking about drinking white wine. I find it disgusting. I prefer red much more.”

*

Jimmy just finished his test as an older man walked into the room. Jimmy had never seen him before. The man had gray hair and had a monocle in his left eye.

“Okay everyone!” the man boomed. “My name is Dr. Ryan Grayson, and I am this school’s principal. Now I would like you all to line up in an orderly fashion.”

Of course, no one was able to line up in an orderly fashion. All of the ten-year-old children were eager to be assigned their first pokemon. Jimmy was able to be fourth in line.

The first student went up and inserted their test into a machine. After a few seconds, a pokeball came out of the machine. The machine announced: “ Pikachu.”

The next student went up, and so did the next. After those two, it was Jimmy’s turn to be assigned a pokemon. His hand trembling, he put his test into the machine. Jimmy now heard a whirring noise in the machine, and then the machine finally announced its decision: “Miltank.”

Jimmy was happy. He had gotten a normal type pokemon, and a strong one at that. Jimmy sat with his pokeball and watched as all the other children got their pokemon.

*

Once the final pokemon was given, and all the children were in their seats, Grayson got up to speak.

“Now children, in the Pokemon University, you are graded upon two different things: tests and battles. Getting good grades on both give you points. Now currently you are all beginner trainers. When you reach twenty points, you will become boulder trainers. The more points you get, the higher your rank becomes. Finally, when you reach the highest rank, master trainer, you will be able to graduate. Any questions?”

No students raised their hands.

“Good. Classes do not begin officially until tomorrow, so take the time to meet your classmates. Let your new journey begin,” said Grayson, and with that, he left.

*

Grayson walked back into his office. He saw Ricter wiped out on the couch, holding a bottle of white wine in his hands. Grayson looked at him for a moment. The man was currently so drunk that he was knocked out, Grayson knew he could trust Ricter to find the traitor and destroy Slithra. Anyway, Grayson had more important things to do, like file all the paperwork that Ricter could not file because he was out cold. Grayson chuckled to himself, and then he began the work.
 
B

Breezy

Well-Known Member
It's seems that all I've been reading today is fics about disesases and death today. So pardon me if I confuse some of your story with other parts.

- Grayson has been pacing his office all night ever since he learned that one of his students was killed by an Arbok bite. However, between then and now, how come the officers couldn't of moved the body? Wouldn't seeing the body and the police in their school cause the kids to more riled up?

- Why can't Grayson just pull the kids out of the school for a bit until they catch Slithera? Better to be safe than sorry right? Of course, maybe that will ruin the purpose of the fic...

- Some mistakes in placing a comma before an conjunction. But nothing too major; I think you have a good grasp on that.

- Cute sense of humor lol
“No, I was talking about drinking white wine. I find it disgusting. I prefer red much more.”
Click to expand...
=3

- Miltank. Good choice. Seeing as it is such a good Pokémon, it's rarely used in fics. Glad Jimmy ain't too clichéd, even though his answers on the test were.

You know what this reminds me of? Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets. Using a snake as a puppet to target certain people in a school and not letting the kids go and trying to keep it all under wraps and such. =3 I like it though. It's an easy read that keeps your attention with your quick style of writing and hook...y...full plot. Hookyfull ain't a word, I know. Just can't think of anything else. x_X

LaTeR dAyZ!
 
N

Neko Godot

Hey! Listen!
Breezy said:
It's seems that all I've been reading today is fics about disesases and death today. So pardon me if I confuse some of your story with other parts.

- Grayson has been pacing his office all night ever since he learned that one of his students was killed by an Arbok bite. However, between then and now, how come the officers couldn't of moved the body? Wouldn't seeing the body and the police in their school cause the kids to more riled up?
Click to expand...
They did move the body into a room, so that kids wouldn't see it. At least, that's what I'm thinking in my head.
 
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