• Hi all. We have had reports of member's signatures being edited to include malicious content. You can rest assured this wasn't done by staff and we can find no indication that the forums themselves have been compromised.

    However, remember to keep your passwords secure. If you use similar logins on multiple sites, people and even bots may be able to access your account.

    We always recommend using unique passwords and enable two-factor authentication if possible. Make sure you are secure.
  • Be sure to join the discussion on our discord at: Discord.gg/serebii
  • If you're still waiting for the e-mail, be sure to check your junk/spam e-mail folders

Pokemon World: Kanto Skies

H

hydroswirl

Water Pokemon Master
pwksqq3.png

[History]
A couple months back, I created my second comic (first comic was a flop) called Pokebubble. I used crude language and lots of suggestive themes and thus caused my comic to fail after a few episodes. However, I learned lots from the experience and I am back with a brand new comic based off the real people in my high school. They look like them, act like them, they are preety much them. Hopefully you'll enjoy reading Pokemon World: Kanto Skies as much as I enjoyed making it.

[Plot]
Pokemon World: Kanto Skies tells the story of Cassandra, a girl,and her journey across Cassandra. (To be expanded with future episodes later)

[Characters]
[01] - Ivana
[02] - Daniela
[03] - Cassandra
[04] - ???

[Episodes]
[001] - Route 1 Rumble!
[002] - Oak Tree in the Empty Forest!
[003] - Taking the Caterpie Home!

[Credits]
-The Spriters Resource - For pretty much everything.

Thanks for reading. Please leave a comment and offer some constructive critisism.[/FONT][/SIZE]
 
Last edited:
B

blueguy

used Metronome!
I like this better than Pokebubble. You've improved a lot. It's too early for me to criticize the overall plot but I want something cool to happen in the next issue. Otherwise, it's very nice visually. Breezing through it, I didn't notice any grammatical errors either. Also, props for original characters! :) You have pretty good effects, too! I'm excited to see what you end up doing. In the cluster of panels second from the bottom right there's a line you didn't erase. And a text bubble was cut off at the bottom.
 
H

hydroswirl

Water Pokemon Master
blueguy said:
I like this better than Pokebubble. You've improved a lot. It's too early for me to criticize the overall plot but I want something cool to happen in the next issue. Otherwise, it's very nice visually. Breezing through it, I didn't notice any grammatical errors either. Also, props for original characters! :) You have pretty good effects, too! I'm excited to see what you end up doing. In the cluster of panels second from the bottom right there's a line you didn't erase. And a text bubble was cut off at the bottom.
Click to expand...

Why did I know you were going to be the first to reply. ;)

Thanks for comment! It was very hard to place text bubbles near the end because there were so many and so little text boxes that I jammed one on the bottom and must've cut it off. Oops. :p I'll have to check for that next time.

Regardless, thanks for the comment, I'll definately try to make the comics really interesting and entertaining. The next episode should be up in a couple of days. Since the episodes are going to be 20 frames+, it does take awhile to make it.

:D
 
N

Nixx

Waiting for the Worm
Change your word boxes. Try to avoid doing the same exact thing as anyone, unless it's as simple as a white box with a black outline.
Other than that, my only complaint is how cramped the panels appear to be. It was pretty tough for me to read through as well as understand the comic.
 
H

hydroswirl

Water Pokemon Master
Nixx said:
Change your word boxes. Try to avoid doing the same exact thing as anyone, unless it's as simple as a white box with a black outline.
Other than that, my only complaint is how cramped the panels appear to be. It was pretty tough for me to read through as well as understand the comic.
Click to expand...

Thanks for the comment/advice. However, the word boxes are of my own creation. First, I used ones that came with the game and got flamed for copying Pokechow's textboxes. I edited the others ones that came with the came and re-colored them. I'm not changing it. Sorry.

I sort of agree on the cramp-ness, I had difficulty placing the text boxes towards the end and I can see how they got a tad confusing. I'll work on that for future comics.
 
B

blueguy

used Metronome!
hydroswirl said:
Thanks for the comment/advice. However, the word boxes are of my own creation. First, I used ones that came with the game and got flamed for copying Pokechow's textboxes. I edited the others ones that came with the came and re-colored them. I'm not changing it. Sorry.

I sort of agree on the cramp-ness, I had difficulty placing the text boxes towards the end and I can see how they got a tad confusing. I'll work on that for future comics.
Click to expand...

No, you got the new ones you use from the game as well... And I used them in Everstone. You didn't make them.
 
H

hydroswirl

Water Pokemon Master
blueguy said:
No, you got the new ones you use from the game as well... And I used them in Everstone. You didn't make them.
Click to expand...

Yes. I did not make them ("my creation" was the wrong word) The way I worded it was kinda wacky. What I meant is that I "edited them" by coloring them, hence making them (sort of) mine. Besides Everstone (which is...gone?) no other comic uses these type of bubbles.

New comic up soon (It's kinda short)
 
Z

Zac Rhodes

Call me Zac
I love it, I like how you did not take the poupularity theam to far with the last comic, and do not make it to over used even though making a journy. Thank god that it is not being spamed with countless posts saying its over used because its a journy, I seen to many comics that could become great destroyed by that.
 
B

blueguy

used Metronome!
hydroswirl said:
Sorry for the delay, here's the next episode:

Reserved Relay
Click to expand...

This episode felt largely like you were trying much too hard. It didn't come off as natural but forced. And the whole issue with Cassandra's popularity being "ruined" is far from ripe with any comedic potential. The whole joke of her giving into peer pressure was fine originally, but you've milked it for all it's worth.

Some things to keep in mind:
- You've given some of your text TOO much breathing room
- When we shriek we don't exclaim "Shriek!" but "Eek!"
 
M

Matt`

r u srs?
A lot better than your other comic.
Good Spriting, good zooming in, and a lot better visually. The only problem would be the panel organization because it can be confusing where to follow.
I don't think the speech bubbles are that big of a deal, but it does sorta look unoriginal.
Another thing that could be improved upon is humor? But I don't know how I could help you with that one.

No male characters? IT'S A SEA OF ESTROGEN.
I'm just saying.
 
H

hydroswirl

Water Pokemon Master
Zac Rhodes said:
I love it, I like how you did not take the poupularity theam to far with the last comic, and do not make it to over used even though making a journy. Thank god that it is not being spamed with countless posts saying its over used because its a journy, I seen to many comics that could become great destroyed by that.
Click to expand...


Thanks so much. I tried to stray away as far as I can to a cliched journey comic. :)

blueguy said:
This episode felt largely like you were trying much too hard. It didn't come off as natural but forced. And the whole issue with Cassandra's popularity being "ruined" is far from ripe with any comedic potential. The whole joke of her giving into peer pressure was fine originally, but you've milked it for all it's worth.

Some things to keep in mind:
- You've given some of your text TOO much breathing room
- When we shriek we don't exclaim "Shriek!" but "Eek!"
Click to expand...

Boo for me and my failed humor. The whole "My popularity is ruined!" comment was supposed to be slight humor, guess it came off rather...badly. I'll try to work on my jokes a little more; I just don't want it to turn into a sex fest like my last comic.

Also, I guess I will have to work on my speech bubbles more. :p Regardless, thanks for the comment, it'll definately help me more in the process.

Matt' said:
A lot better than your other comic.
Good Spriting, good zooming in, and a lot better visually. The only problem would be the panel organization because it can be confusing where to follow.
I don't think the speech bubbles are that big of a deal, but it does sorta look unoriginal.
Another thing that could be improved upon is humor? But I don't know how I could help you with that one.

No male characters? IT'S A SEA OF ESTROGEN.
I'm just saying.
Click to expand...

Yes, my approach to making this comment was rather stupid; I made all the frames then added in the bubbles, that probably threw off the flow of it all. I'm not doing that anymore.

I'll definately try to implement more humor, it'll be rather difficult. All I know is sex and random; and since I'm not gonna use sex...I have to go with random. We'll see how that turns out in my next comic.

Also, the male character thing. I have SEVERAL male characters that I'm waiting to throw in, however, I didn't want to throw them all in at once. We already got 4 new characters in 2 episodes, with a 5th one coming soon. So ya, I'll try to implement the males sooner.

Thanks for all your critism, I'm sure this'll help me in the future. :D
 
Last edited:
H

hydroswirl

Water Pokemon Master
OMG! Sorry for the ginormous lack of updates, I kept putting off the episode more and more. But, I have finally done it and have regained my momentum. Here is episode 3:

Taking the Caterpie Home!

For now, I'm hoping to make another episode by Monday and make a Halloween special. I'm not gonna do the special if I don't have any characters to work with; so I'm hoping to introduce a new one or do something inventive. I'd also like to get rid of the shabby character bios and do some trainer cards for each trainer; that way it'll look nicer. :)

C & C please. :p
 
H

hydroswirl

Water Pokemon Master
rtfgdfgdfgdfgdfreterterte
 
Last edited:
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top