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and you have to wait til you beat Greevil before you can trade in XD, and you can only trade purified or non shadow pokemon, and the E4 in a pokemon GBA game, but not R/S I think
Yep, take down Greevil and you're fine. You'll also need to satisfy the necessary conditions for trading with other games in the GBA games as well. Link up from Phenac PokeCenter.
As was said, you must beat Greevil on XD, and the E4 in FR/LG/E. R/S, however, doesn't need to have the elite 4 beaten in order to trade with it, so you can trade right from the beginning.
Also remember that eggs cannot be traded to XD