Relationships - BFs/GFs/crushes

[Aquadon]

How do I get a girl to like me?

She is in 8th grade right now and I'm a freshman - would that be a huge problem?

Personally I think that the gap between school levels makes the difference. I managed (as seen previously in this thread) to hook up with a high school senior, and I decided not to go any further for that reason (as I'm in College). I'd say wait the 4 months until she's in High School, and then go from there.

As for making them like you, it's all up to them. It doesn't hurt though to interact with them in one form or another.

 

[Zazie]

I just made a huge accomplishment(well for me anyways) There is this girl i liked then i figured out she was a lesbian. so we became great friends and got really close. Then i just was so turned on by her that i kissed her. She didn't pull away until after a minute or two. Then the next day she didn't talk to me. Failure! i said to myself then she said that after three years of being a lesbian she never thought someone could change her. so now shes a bisexual and we share a lot of great times with her "friends"

That isn't how sexuality works. People don't all of a sudden become Bisexual, she would have had to have been bisexual all along. (maybe she didn't know it at the time)

P.s. I believe that if a girl can't respect you like pokemon then she is not worth it.

The truth. If someone doesn't like you the way you are then they aren't worth the time or effort.

Anyway I found out that comic-con girl (that will be her nickname) is also bi so that's another large plus, as it means she is much more likely to be understanding about me being bi. Between that and her being a fan of tabletop RPG's there is too much evidence towards asking her out so I did. Unfortunately it's the summer and it's difficult for me to get in contact with her, so I had to do it through facebook, which she apparently doesn't check regularly because it's been 2 days and still no response. (last time it was 3-5 days til I got a response from her so I doubt she is ignoring me)

Of course the difficulty of keeping in contact could be a problem when combined with the fact that I will be oversees one month from now until the fall semester starts. I am hoping I might be able to start a proper relationship with her when I get back. (if things work out properly anyway)

 

[Yanmegamaster]

The truth. If someone doesn't like you the way you are then they aren't worth the time or effort.

I agree to that 100%. Or at least if they don't respect the way you are.

 

[9dragonbreed]

She is in 8th grade right now and I'm a freshman - would that be a huge problem?

Well for me it wasn't. It is only a year difference right so there should be a huge problem. You see for me she lived down the street, rode the same bus. We saw each other a lot, except school. (different schools) But if you two go to the same school a see a lot of each other than it should be fine.

How do I get a girl to like me?

This is something completely different. All i can tell you is to be kind, caring, and charming.

 

[Ammako]

Something along the lines of, "Hey, I've seen you around a lot lately, but I can't seem to remember your name." And then when she tells you her name, introduce yourself and say something like, "Good meeting you. I'll see you around!" And now you can say hi in the hallway, etc. Basically, I agree with Sergei's post.

It would mean I knew her name at some point but then forgot it.
But if I like her but managed to forget her name, wouldn't that just make me end up looking stupid?
I'd rather just ask directly for her name at some point.

 

[Aquadon]

It would mean I knew her name at some point but then forgot it.
But if I like her but managed to forget her name, wouldn't that just make me end up looking stupid?
I'd rather just ask directly for her name at some point.

NO! Do NOT, under any circumstances, do that. That never bodes well for you. A MUCH better method, if you play it right, is introducing a friend of yours to the girl. That way, they can say their name, she'll say her name, and you'll pick up on it so you can remember her name without looking like a fool.

And from there, you can start to work on making it something.

 

[Ammako]

I don't know if it's a good idea, we're not friends or anything yet.
If I walked up to her and introduced one of my friends to her, I don't know, it would seem too awkward.
Let's say someone you don't know walked up to you and introduced his friend to you, how would you react?

 

[SergeiDragunov]

I don't know if it's a good idea, we're not friends or anything yet.
If I walked up to her and introduced one of my friends to her, I don't know, it would seem too awkward.
Let's say someone you don't know walked up to you and introduced his friend to you, how would you react?

If you're not friends or anything yet, you could probably start small. You got any classes in school together or anything? If you do, you could talk to her on the way out or something about something that happened in there. That's how I started to my ex-girlfriend. I mean the girl turned out to be a friggin' psycho but hey, at least my approach was effective.

 

[Zazie]

I'd rather just ask directly for her name at some point.

That's probably the best choice you can make. Try starting a conversation first and have a reason to talk to her, then it won't look strange. It really helps to have something on common with the person though, you may not be able to strike up a conversation completely out of the blue without sounding weird. If you really can't find some kind of common ground to start conversation with though, perhaps you may want to re-evaluate why you like her in the first place.

 

[Zenotwapal]

tales of my sorry buttocks

I'm beating myself up about it now:
The girl that I like (who just happens to be my friend) is dating another dickwad again, not as horridly horrible as the last one, but nonetheless horrible.
I hate this because as both a friend and a love stricken fool, i want her to be happy, but my love stricken fool side of me wants to castrate the dickwad.
Thinkk i should make a attempt to break them up?
Or just wait for it to start falling apart and then help tear it down the rest of the way?

 

[Waterpokes]

I'm beating myself up about it now:
The girl that I like (who just happens to be my friend) is dating another dickwad again, not as horridly horrible as the last one, but nonetheless horrible.
I hate this because as both a friend and a love stricken fool, i want her to be happy, but my love stricken fool side of me wants to castrate the dickwad.
Thinkk i should make a attempt to break them up?
Or just wait for it to start falling apart and then help tear it down the rest of the way?

You're wasting your time, brotha.

If you make an attempt to break them up, maybe this girl will think you're too much involved in her personal life. You should rather watch them break apart, then mess up their relationship. I know how it feels dude, but you shouldn't go into their relationship, even though the guy might be a douche. Be happy on her behalf, and wait for it to fall apart instead.

Good thing I don't like anybody, in this kinda way, right now. Sure they might be pretty and nice, but maybe I should just wait for the right one. I'm having dreams about this girl I meet, and hopefully this dream can come true.

 

[Yanmegamaster]

I'm beating myself up about it now:
The girl that I like (who just happens to be my friend) is dating another dickwad again, not as horridly horrible as the last one, but nonetheless horrible.
I hate this because as both a friend and a love stricken fool, i want her to be happy, but my love stricken fool side of me wants to castrate the dickwad.
Thinkk i should make a attempt to break them up?
Or just wait for it to start falling apart and then help tear it down the rest of the way?

Don't try to break them up dude. Its just gonna make the girl become farther from you. Instead, since the guy is a "****wad?" as you say then the relationship shouldn't last. But as soon as it does, try to comfort her. Just wait it out.

 

[Aquadon]

Thirding said opinion. Playing "break up" makes you out to be the said "bad guy" in this situation, so it might be good to sit this one out and let it take its course.

In the mean time, I would say try to make it look like your not interested in her. Nothing makes a girl swoon like a guy that they can't have (even though in reality she easily can).

 

[Juputoru]

I'm beating myself up about it now:
The girl that I like (who just happens to be my friend) is dating another dickwad again, not as horridly horrible as the last one, but nonetheless horrible.
I hate this because as both a friend and a love stricken fool, i want her to be happy, but my love stricken fool side of me wants to castrate the dickwad.
Thinkk i should make a attempt to break them up?
Or just wait for it to start falling apart and then help tear it down the rest of the way?

Meddling in other people's love lives:Bad idea
Meddling in other people's love lives because you have a crush on the girl and you want to be the girl's ~knight in shining armor~ by saving her from the guy you have decreed to be Not Good Enough For Her: Completely terrible idea.

Take a step back. Breathe. Now ask yourself "is this guy really an asshole, or am I just seeing it that way because I'm crushing on the girl he's with?" You may have the surprising revelation that the guy really isn't that bad after all.
Still think the guy's a jerk after looking at things as clearly as your hormone-riddled teenage brain can? If you guys are good enough friends, you might be able to get away with telling the girl that you think her guy's a jerk...but you still can't try to play anti-matchmaker with them. No matter how much it hurts your love-addled heart to see her with that guy. It's highly unlikely that the girl will listen to you if you try to break them up - she clearly doesn't think the guy's a jerk, since she's dating him. On top of that, she may very well resent you for trying to control her life, which could drastically decrease your chances of ever being able to date her.
Sit back, bite your tongue, and let their relationship play out. You'll be better off for it.

 

[Ammako]

That's probably the best choice you can make. Try starting a conversation first and have a reason to talk to her, then it won't look strange. It really helps to have something on common with the person though, you may not be able to strike up a conversation completely out of the blue without sounding weird. If you really can't find some kind of common ground to start conversation with though, perhaps you may want to re-evaluate why you like her in the first place.

Well when I first saw her... I felt she was different somehow.
You know, there are tons of girls that are prettier than her, but I don't care.
As if I saw a big field of the same kind of flower, then out of nowhere a different kind of flower was growing there.

I want to get to know her better because the looks aren't everything.
It's better to have a girlfriend that you think is beautiful, IMO.
But her looks are what got me wanting to know her better.
If it turns out she's not that great, I will probably feel like crap for a while, but at least I would have tried.

But that's okay. When I feel like crap, there is always something I can do to feel better.

Last week, all odds seemed to be against me since I didn't get to talk to her, even though I tried.
Then there was Thursday, when all grade 9th were not there (my best friend and her are in there.)
And if nothing could go worse, there was a 4-days weekend (friday and monday are off.)

Last class of the day, I had to go in French class. I sit, then I'm like *Sigh...*
Teacher tells us she thinks she's in a depression, which doesn't exactly make me feel better.
But you know what? She still acted as if nothing happened, even though what was happening to her was far worse than what is happening to me!

I think Earth needs more people like that so that nobody can get in a depression ever again.

 

[Zenotwapal]

Meddling in other people's love lives:Bad idea
Meddling in other people's love lives because you have a crush on the girl and you want to be the girl's ~knight in shining armor~ by saving her from the guy you have decreed to be Not Good Enough For Her: Completely terrible idea.

Take a step back. Breathe. Now ask yourself "is this guy really an asshole, or am I just seeing it that way because I'm crushing on the girl he's with?" You may have the surprising revelation that the guy really isn't that bad after all.
Still think the guy's a jerk after looking at things as clearly as your hormone-riddled teenage brain can? If you guys are good enough friends, you might be able to get away with telling the girl that you think her guy's a jerk...but you still can't try to play anti-matchmaker with them. No matter how much it hurts your love-addled heart to see her with that guy. It's highly unlikely that the girl will listen to you if you try to break them up - she clearly doesn't think the guy's a jerk, since she's dating him. On top of that, she may very well resent you for trying to control her life, which could drastically decrease your chances of ever being able to date her.
Sit back, bite your tongue, and let their relationship play out. You'll be better off for it.

See, thats what I was planning to do.
But thanks for clearing it up.

To let you know, the guy is truely an asshole, he will literally flip you off if you approach him for anything.

I guess your very right, I'm going to wait.

 

[Yanmegamaster]

I might as well put this on here,
Well, I'm a guy and there has been this girl whom i never really shared feelings with until recently like 2 months ago when I had this dream that she was my wife. Me, believing that all our lives are planned, started getting more feelings for her by the day since i keep having dreams where she is in them. She was also in my drama club where we hung out often and its because of that drama club that we became friends. The thing is, is that even though we are fairly close i don't believe she likes me. I mean sure we had this little party at drama club and sure we stayed close throughout the whole thing but i'm still not sure. The reasons for this is because i think she might like a guy who sits right next to me and right behind her in homeroom. Now this guy is my friend but i hate him at the same time because whenever i start to really like a girl, she ALWAYS winds up liking him. He is the guitarist music guy in my school and I'm the techno dancing nerd....plus she is really cool, she likes rock and plays guitar while i play nothing...I'm getting really discouraged by this but I still have hope. Anyways, just wanted to put this on here.

P.s. I believe that if a girl can't respect you like pokemon then she is not worth it.

By the way I found out that the rocker guy is taken now with an other girl. But i still need help. It's almost the end of the year and i wanna be with her but since we are going to different high schools it would be hard. I'm fearing that I can never be with her before high school starts. She can barely text and doesnt have a facebook since her parents are kind of strict. so what should i do?

 

[Ammako]

You and her are good friends.
You should tell her your feelings for her and tell her you still want to be friends with her or something in case she doesn't like you that much.
Does she know you like Pokémon? If so then you and her could PM each other since you're not going to be in the same high school.
Or you could talk on MSN, if her parents aren't that strict.

Does she live near you? If so then you could invite her to your house sometimes (or you could go to her house.)

Either way, I think it's probably easier to talk to the girl you like if she's good friends with you.
If she doesn't feel the same way, since she's good friends with you she should understand.

 

[Yanmegamaster]

Thats the thing, with girls you really never can tell if they like you or not. I believe she does, and i believe she doesn't too. it is kind of confusing actually. But I'ma try it, and i also believe that her parents are to strict to have her have an msn as well. Anyways yes she knows I like pokemon since i wipped out the ol'ds during drama club sometimes, and i don't believe it affects her that much. But i'll try your advice thanks

 

[Ammako]

Right, the only way you can hope to be with her before the end of the year is by trying.
Not mentioning the guy you thought liked her is now with another girl, which gives you more chance.