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Share your feelings

Kutie Pie

"It is my destiny."
My brothers are leaving first thing tomorrow morning to go to the MTC in Utah, where they'll stay for a couple of weeks before going to their separate missions for two years. I wish I did more with them before I left early Sunday afternoon to go to my grandparents' place for the week as usual. I doubt I'm going to see them off either, since my parents are choosing to drive them up there, though they may stop by for a few minutes to say their goodbyes. Though if they do, it'd probably before six, so...

Yeah... I'm rather torn over this, but I think I'll be okay (I have more brothers, though I'm trying to get one to agree to spend quality time with me on demand). The house will be a bit quieter... a bit. It'll probably feel weird walking by their closed (probably locked) bedroom for the next few weeks. So until then, I'm watching over some of their things they chose to give to me, like their manga and video games to name a few. And if they haven't deactivated their accounts (they're supposed to, but most missionaries don't), I'll also keep an eye on them as well. Most likely than not I'll still be able to keep in contact with them, whether through snail mail (if so, I don't know how I'm going to read their handwriting), or their mission e-mails. Probably the latter more. I'm just not allowed to write about the regular things we would normally talk about.

Oh well... it was bound to happen anyway.


Back in the meantime
Feeling a bit weird right now and bored not to mention and cannot decide on what to do.... Now that I think about it, since my birthday's exactly a week from now, it makes things a bit weirder... The feelings I had from that anime event I attended last Sunday are still haunting me up to now too.


Never Forget
At my school we have a girls-choice dance in like November or something. I'm feeling really nervous because I don't want anyone to ask me. Yeah, you read that right, I don't want to be asked. Because, I really don't want to go and I don't want to have to reject anyone. I'm fairly certain I will be asked, though, which sucks. I really don't want the girl I'm interested in to ask me either because I don't want her to think I don't like her as more than a friend. ugh. I don't do well with people.


K-pop Addict
Despite feeling exhausted from a rough day, I enjoyed today. For a change, that is. Me and my crush are getting on so well today. We spent three school periods - about 2 hours and 15 minutes - just talking, getting to know each other, cracking jokes and the like. We also keep sitting next to each other for lunch and break, as well as constantly talking on Facebook and sending Snapchats to each other. He knows I like him - I told him a month ago, and he said he likes me back but I think we're both just scared to do anything about it. I don't want to make the first move though; being the woman in the relationship, I feel like he should ask me out first. Nobody expects him to be bisexual, but he told me he is which was strange because he's just so... Normal that you wouldn't expect it from him. Plus, he's totally buff and Italian with a really cute accent, which makes me so happy when I get to physically touch him. (Which isn't often :c)

I just want him so badly. Everyday I find myself just staring at him, and he stares at me. As a psychology student, we were learning in class about how the mind works when it is in love/when it has a crush. Apparently if you hold eye contact with each other for 2 seconds or longer before looking away from each other, it is a sign that you are both infatuated with each other. I decided that I would see if he would do it back, so I deliberately made eye contact with him and he didn't look away awkwardly. He just smiled, which gave me major butterflies and I started to giggle out of awkwardness. We finish school and go on leavers together with our friends on the 4th December, and our exams start in a couple of weeks. I have a feeling something will happen between us after our exams; he told me he's too scared to come out at school where people could judge him, which is fine by me. He's too perfect for me to say no to. <3

// End rant //

TL;DR - I might date the guy I like soon because he's showing signs of interest in me. Like a lot. So yes, I want a very fabulous homosexual relationship with that Italian Stallion. <3


As an epilogue to my last post here, which was:

I've just written a declaration of feelings for someone... and I'm not sure if this is going to ruin everything.

I've just returned from a long weekend in Paris with the person referred to above. Suffice to say I'm feeling very, very happy. ^_^


Never Forget
I'm feeling sad/mad/bored/nervous. Nervous because of reason previously stated. Bored because its Wednesday so I got out of school early and I have nothing to do. Mad because this kid pissed me off at school today. Sad because I keep thinking about my relationships with various people.


A monument to all your sins
Feeling so angry. My mother will not listen to the truth. We started arguing because I said she wouldn't but in, and she did and said she didn't.(she even disagrees with butting in herself and doesn't let me do it, what a hypocrite) she is now punishing me, like sending me to my dad (I don't like him). It's not fair. Help. Please. Even my sister doesn't believe me. It's not fair to punish me heavily just for trying to tell the truth. Any advice?
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Aura Of Twilight

Forever Clueless
Just yelled at my parents and ran outside to cry for like twenty minutes. I'm sick of the crap I have to listen to from them. My parents don't even act like they love each other, and it seems whenever they try to talk to each other someone gets pissed. This is often the series of events:

Mom: *Tries to start a conversation or asks my Dad if he wants something/can do her a favor.*
Dad: *Replies in what could be considered a pissed off voice* What?
Mom: *glares at him* Nevermind
Dad: *Doesn't get why she's mad and gets annoyed* Well Jesus christ! I can't even talk to you without you getting mad at me!

And then I have to listen to them say mean things to each other under their breath. I could go on, but I'll just make it simple: My Dad goes to the bar too often, spends little time at home. My mom is depressed, doesn't talk to him that much, and doesn't really try to handle things like an adult.

I know I sound harsh, but right now I don't care. I want to go home...not live in this crazy hellhole.


Never Forget
I feel kind of odd. Girls I haven't talked to in months and some I've never talked to are starting to talk to me. Its kinda weird, but not entirely bad. One of the girls used to like me, but she has a boyfriend now and the last time we talked she was pissed because I wasn't very nice to her. I wasn't intentionally being inconsiderate, I had just broken up with my ex and I really didn't want to talk to anyone at the time and I'm not exactly the most socially adept person to begin with. So I'm confused as to why she started talking to me again. I'm just confused at the whole situation.


New Member
finding bliss

Do you fall to the trap of assuming that your sole purpose in life is to be useful? Discovering your personal bliss may include accomplishment, but the full, balanced scope of your existence may include times where being lazy is just as appealing. Here are some ideas for enjoying totally free or affordable fun, all the while displaying a marked lack of productivity.


Need to take an internet break for a few months. Outside of school projects anyway. I've been pretty stupid these last couple of months online.

Break starts now.

Archangel Azazel

Fallen Angel
Feeling conffuzled <.>

Mostly related to my friends... I hope I get out of this issue quick seeing as it takes away my focus and... yeah.. silly moi :c It seems so insignificant, but when it keeps distrcting you, its time to face it, but I can't >:c


Comes out of Nowhere
I feel sad. I moved away from the school I hated because of the kids...but now I miss my friends, teachers, etc. I'm having memories I wanted to show those teachers before I go away to college... It's an awful feeling. You can say I'm... "school sick"


Mage of Mind
I feel a little self-pitiful today. Once I got home from work, I spent the whole day inside, which wouldn't usually be a problem, but it is since I also did next to nothing but browse around on the internet with my time.

Maybe I'm just a big workaholic, but if I'm not doing something with my time, I get a bit depressed. Yet, the call of Reddit is so hard to neglect...


Back in the meantime
Feeling tired. Today was a bit of a rest day for me but oddly enough I still feel a bit tired from the vacation I had last weekend