Sibling Points of Views

[*~Gypsy Abyss~*]

How does it feel to be the younger sibling?

How does it feel to be the older sibling?

~I myself am an older sibling and I KNOW it isn't a smooth and peachy road. Listening to other people in the same situation... I noticed a lot of topics get repeated and brought up.

*For Example, I hear a lot of:

I'm always in my brother/or sisters shadow!

My parents give my younger sibling ALL the attention!

I just want to help my younger brother/ or sister but they don't want anything to do with me or don't want to take my advice! How come my sibling can't see that I'm looking out for them and don't want to see them get hurt, or go down a real bad road!

My older sibling tries to act like they are my parent!

My sibling just doesn't understand me!

Etc, etc etc, and the list goes on...

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Why do we have these conflicts?
Why do we do what we do, and react how we react?
Why does it get to the point where there is pent up resentment, anger, jealousy, and maybe even hatred in between?
How come we just can't get along?

And if you are one of the fortunate one's that happen to actually have a REAL good relationship with your sibling, please share your secrets to success LOL I'm sure a lot of us would like to know.

*If there is an issue that isn't on the list yet? Feel free to post it.*

 

[Ethan]

I have a hunch that your topic would be better suited for Misc. discussion. It was just a tad bit too broad to debate bud.

 

[Lucas!]

Honestly, I hate being the youngest. I have to get my permit last, graduate last, go to college last. I'll be making the most money, so I'll make my first million first. Lmao.

 

[abraxas]

I don’t mind being the oldest, but I feel that I was suited to be in that position. That is to say, being the oldest, you’re most often looked up to, seen to be a positive influence, and I have fallen short of being such. To say I was displeased when younger to hear I had a brother on the way would be an understatement. Growing up, I didn’t fulfill my older brother obligations, and mistreated my brother in many way. When the time came for my sister, I wasn’t as unpleasant, but I was still far off from being what I should have been.
Now, these many years later, I look back on those years with great regret, felling ashamed of what I did.
I’m much better with my siblings today, but every time I see them, I’m reminded of all the wrong I inflicted, and ultimately feel that I have let them down.
So, as I said, I don’t mind being the eldest, I just feel I went about it the wrong way.

 

[cbiesra]

Honestly, I hate being the youngest. I have to get my permit last, graduate last, go to college last. I'll be making the most money, so I'll make my first million first. Lmao.

This.

Plus, my parents have already learned what and what not to do with my sister and how to avoid mistakes they made with her so I get/got away with a lot less too.

 

[Kimmi the Awesome™]

I'm the younger of 2 kids (I'm 19, my brother's 26), but since said brother made a lot of stupid decisions in his life, I have to deal with my parents constantly telling me to "not be like my brother" or dealing with him constantly whining to my parents for something. It seems like I can never make them proud enough to dig myself out of the grave he dug for me. :/

 

[*green_vulpix*]

Well, I'm the youngest. Unless you count my step-siblings, but it doesn't seem to change anything ultimately. Also, I am a twin, but I'm the younger one.
I guess it's not that bad. My older twin sister seems to think I'm the "favorite" out of the bunch....but I don't think that's true. I just never do anything "bad" or things my parents would not approve of. I don't think it has anything to do with the fact that I'm the youngest. I'm sure if she didn't do the things she did or acted the way she does, she wouldn't think that I'm the "favorite".

 

[Erienne]

I'm the younger sibling, but my brother is way less mature than I am. He's also a jerk. :d

All I can say is that I'm definitely not in his shadow, no doubt.

 

[DarkGypsy]

I don’t mind being the oldest, but I feel that I was suited to be in that position. That is to say, being the oldest, you’re most often looked up to, seen to be a positive influence, and I have fallen short of being such. To say I was displeased when younger to hear I had a brother on the way would be an understatement. Growing up, I didn’t fulfill my older brother obligations, and mistreated my brother in many way. When the time came for my sister, I wasn’t as unpleasant, but I was still far off from being what I should have been.
Now, these many years later, I look back on those years with great regret, felling ashamed of what I did.
I’m much better with my siblings today, but every time I see them, I’m reminded of all the wrong I inflicted, and ultimately feel that I have let them down.
So, as I said, I don’t mind being the eldest, I just feel I went about it the wrong way.

Abraxas, I think you worded that beautifully and said everything I was personally feeling about my own situation.

My sister and I are about 9-10 years apart. The whole time before that I always begged and pleaded for my mom to get me a little brother or sister.

At the point in my life when I finally did get my little sister. I was going through very tough times. Times with family, friends, my inner self. I had no way out and was too young to properly deal with it and as a result I grew very angry and frustrated. What made it explode, was the "mistakes" that went on in my life my mom learned from and didn't do that with my sister.

Right now, I am completely greatful for that. But at the time... I grew hateful, resentful, bitter and I was jealous. I saw my innocent little sister as "The Great Golden Child" that could do no wrong and had the perfect little packaged life.

Now that I'm older. I'm glad my sister didn't have to live through the things I did. I went through so many things I wouldn't wish upon anyone.

I have grown and changed a lot, and dealt with my anger, and the jealousy is far from my mind.

All I feel now is complete love for my sister but I fear my past treatment toward her has scarred her internally. I am working my way to a better relationship with her. Though, I still have my issues, because like everyone says "the road is not easy". All I want now is to be her friend. Someone she can count on, can come and speak to about anything - no matter what topic. I want her to trust me and feel open to count on me when she needs it. I want that bond and relationship that I had envisioned when I was that young girl wishing and wanting a little sibling. I want her to see me as a good role-model and person.

I accept that I MAY NEVER get that opportunity, and it hurts me deeply when she resists, I see clearly that she hides things, twists things, acts and covers her true thoughts, feelings, oppinions and emotions. Probably more than she really thinks I do. And I'm sad that she feels she has to do that.

I see that she is turning into a very great young lady now and is finding her way. I fear that she'll fly and forget about me forever. But I cannot change the past. I just don't want it to affect our future.

*~Cross your fingers and wish me luck on my journey guys!~*

 

[Joe Vega #4]

I pretty much have a love/hate relationship with my little sister. Sometimes, we get along, but it doesn't take much to get one of us mad at the other for one reason or another. We both act like jerks. My sister learned a lot from my bad behavior when she was little, and even when I tried to be nicer, she kept acting like me and stubbornly stuck to her behavior. Over the years, she hasn't gotten that much better. She gets good grades in school, but still has the common sense and attitude of a 3-year-old.

What really irks me is that I got more punishment from my parents than she ever did, and even when she was punished, she begged and cried enough to force my parents to lift her time-out/grounding/whatever just to get her to shut up.

 

[SapphireGeno]

I've always been the youngest throughout my whole life out of three kids. But my parents aren't married anymore... and now my dad is engaged and his girlfriend is going to have my half brother sometime this month (most likely around my birthday). Plus she has two younger kids and an older kid. So I'm somewhere in the middle lol...

I just hope my half brother isn't born on my birthday. :/ I don't like sharing special days. Plus I was always the July baby in the family. Not anymore. Rawwr.

 

[Miss Rarity]

I have two younger siblings, I'm the oldest. Every time I tell people that they're like "Whaat? I would expect you to be the youngest. You sure act like that"

Which makes me wonder what the youngest are supposed to act like cause I don't think I act like my youngest sibling... At least I don't think so.

 

[Competitive5910]

This.

Plus, my parents have already learned what and what not to do with my sister and how to avoid mistakes they made with her so I get/got away with a lot less too.

Actually time reports that the higher the sibling is according to 1st born, 2nd born, etc, IQ decreases as you go down. So the younger is actually not as smart, due to the fact that the older one is born with much more attention during the early ages than the younger one.

I have proof. The article is in my room.
>_>
But being older really sucks. Especially since my sister wants to watch hannah montana and Wizards every day.

You know what? i ACTUALLY know the names of the Jonas Brothers. I am pitiful, no?

 

[Dragard]

I'm an older sibling, and I hate my little sister. Shes 11 and has no intelligence. I think I'm gonna killer her soon, after watching much Higurashi no Naku Koro ni

 

[Lucas!]

Actually time reports that the higher the sibling is according to 1st born, 2nd born, etc, IQ decreases as you go down. So the younger is actually not as smart, due to the fact that the older one is born with much more attention during the early ages than the younger one.

I have proof. The article is in my room.
>_>
But being older really sucks. Especially since my sister wants to watch hannah montana and Wizards every day.

You know what? i ACTUALLY know the names of the Jonas Brothers. I am pitiful, no?

Yeah, that article can go **** it's self. I'm easily smarter than my brother and my sister. I'm not saying there dumb, my sister has a teaching degree in high school English, but I get things much more easier than they do.

 

[Dimentio]

I'm an older sibling, and might I add what an ironic time for this thread to emerge and me to notice it; My sister and I are at a current disagreement right now. >.>

I know none of you guys care, but the argument has stemmed from the fact that I am far from appreciative of her new sense of reality (She will refuse to hear a person's opinion about her and yet she's incredibly opinionated, plus the fact there are times when she has no sense of a person's boundaries, and lastly that she has a way of showing that she seems to think she's above everyone). Let me just add that she's 12. I realize that it's something she's likely going through due to her age and those around her. I'm normally a very lax person, but all of this combined gets to me after so much in one sitting. Therefore since my parents have yet to tell her she can't act this way I did, and in a very rude and blunt manner, if I might add. I realize it's not at all in my line of business, but it had to be done.

...So in response to the actual topic of the thread, the above is how I believe most sibling disagreements occur.

 

[Megg Lavender]

I am the oldest child in my family, and I have one younger sibling who is two years younger than me. (She was Sakura Kinomoto here, but left long ago...)

Anyway, my sister and I either get along or not get along. But, almost always, we manage to get through our fight and get along again.

As for my opinion of being the older sister, I sometimes like it and also dislike it. My parents used to expect me to be some kind of role model for my younger sister. But sometimes, that tends to fail for me. I sometimes feel as if I should be the younger sister. I can be clueless at times, and my sister would correct me. ;;

But it's just how life is for me. I have been through it sixteen years already, and there's nothing to do about it.

 

[tom-tom]

Middle is the worst by far. because you get beat up by the older and annoyed by the younger

 

[Tadashi]

I'm the oldest, and I love it. It's fun to have someone to boss around, especially when you're little.

 

[Hitokage2]

Actually time reports that the higher the sibling is according to 1st born, 2nd born, etc, IQ decreases as you go down. So the younger is actually not as smart, due to the fact that the older one is born with much more attention during the early ages than the younger one.

I have proof. The article is in my room.
>_>
But being older really sucks. Especially since my sister wants to watch hannah montana and Wizards every day.

You know what? i ACTUALLY know the names of the Jonas Brothers. I am pitiful, no?

I think I heard of that article, but it definitely is not absolute. My IQ is higher than my older sister. I have consistently gotten better grades than her and scored higher than her on IQ and standardized tests, so it's not universal but probably a general assumption.

I'm the younger brother. I hate it and love it at the same time. As the younger brother, I tend to be more sheltered and sometimes can get away some stuff. It's also been helpful to watch my sister make mistakes and go through her college applications and other stuff. She had to figure out a lot of stuff on her own, and it's nice to have some of her helpful advice. She also looked out for me and helped me out when I was young. It's also been tough being the last to get stuff, and I remember being jealous of my sister at times when she would be the first to get a driver's license and be the first to go out with friends without parents. In my experience, most sibling arguments were based on jealousy and stupid, minor, annoying habits. I used to freak out whenever my sister took some of my things, but most sibling arguments were resolved over time. My sister looks and acts younger than me, so people usually think that I'm the older brother.

I agree that it would probably be worse being the middle child. My sister and I have our occasional arguments (like any sibling), but I have a good relationship with my sister, and she puts up with me when I'm annoying. I like my sister, but I also wish that I had an older brother. Younger siblings can be annoying and difficult when they're pre-teens or teenagers.