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team pikachu

J

Jetx

hooray, it's Jetx!
He's talking. Next thing you know he's fishing. Then he appears at his house. *shrug*

Also, SPACES after punctuation marks please.Writing like this,isn't a good idea!Okay?Good.

Speech bubbles are decent though. Not much of a plot yet, can't say much.
 
C

Controller of Flames

Taking Care
Your intro is not even needed as your first comic and title already explained everything I need to know.

You have a tone of misspelling and grammar errors. Bulbsaur is one example. Act like your comic is and English project. Your teacher wouldn’t want misspellings in it would she?

Finally give credit to the people who ripped your sprites or the place you got it from. I know firsthand how hard it is to rip sprites from games and I doubt you ripped all of those.
 
M

montblancerk

Junior Ninja
there isn't really any story, and if you had one it doesn't flow. It seems rushed
and the jokes don't click, at all. This needs a lot of work and less jokes that appeal to ten year olds. Sorry if I've offended you.
 
T

Treeckoman7

Stickers are ghetto
This really stinks. I mean one second he is fishing then they are drinking hot cocoa! You have so many spelling and gramatical errors it is hard to read and the plot is so awful. My gosh! Also please give credit to the people who spent so much time ripping those sprites!
 
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