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Tell a joke, die laughing -- New and improved!

Steampunk

One Truth Prevails
simple:
you tell a joke
tell people if u liked their jokes
die laughing.

ok i'll start with a joke.

what do you call a guy with no arms or legs, hanging on a wall..
...Art

(please keep jokes told funny, the last thread got shut down partly due to people just posting numbers as jokes)
 

Chapter

hello, im back sorta
If a man is skydiving, and his parachute doesn't work, what do you call him?
A: A hospital. This is gunna be oooooonnnneeee big mess.
LOL:D
 

Scaldaver

Limitless
A man goes into a hospital, and his Doctor says to him:
"Well, I've got good news and bad news."
"What's the good news, doc?" the patient asks, worried.
"Well, you have 24 hours to live."
"WHAT‽" screamed the patient, "HOW COULD THE BAD NEWS BE ANY WORSE‽"
"Well," his Doctor said uneasily, "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."


(P.S, Long live the interrobang!)
 

Syrus

Praise the Sun!
The game.

You just lost it.

Nah I kid, okay here goes, bit short though.

So I'm on a Whisky diet; I've lost three days already.
 

Hilda

Well-Known Member
A man goes into a hospital, and his Doctor says to him:
"Well, I've got good news and bad news."
"What's the good news, doc?" the patient asks, worried.
"Well, you have 24 hours to live."
"WHAT‽" screamed the patient, "HOW COULD THE BAD NEWS BE ANY WORSE‽"
"Well," his Doctor said uneasily, "I've been trying to contact you since yesterday..."


(P.S, Long live the interrobang!)






A man goes into a hospital, and his Doctor says to him:
"Well, I've got good news and bad news."
"What's the bad news, doc?" the patient asks, worried.
"Well, you have 24 hours to live."
"WHAT‽" screamed the patient, "What's the good news then".
"The good news is that I have no other bad news" replied the doctor.
 

Scaldaver

Limitless
I feel my joke has been mutilated. I must do another!

One upon a time there was a purple Kingdom in a purple land where a purple pauper loved the purple princess in the purple palace. The purple princess in the purple palace also loved the purple pauper and they devised a plan: at night the purple princess stole from her purple room, down the purple hallways down the purple steps out of the purple palace and into a purple carriage the purple pauper was leading. The purple guards noticed and took the purple pauper, leading him through the purple yard, in the purple palace, down purple steps, through purple corridors, into the purple dungeons, where the purple guard unlocked with the purple key, shoved him in, and said:

'Indigo.'

.
.
.
Yeah, not one of my best...
 

tyranitarenthusiast

Well-Known Member
finds shiny graveler...

...graveler used self destruct
 

The Admiral

solid state survivor
I'm not sure I like the prospect of dying after saying something, but here goes.

Two men walk into a bar. Ouch.

Two crows walk into a bar. They look at each other and nod. One of them pulls out a crowbar and attempts to hit the bartender with it, clearly intending to kill! Unfortunately, he misses by a significant margin. The bartender, also a crow, applauds the two gentlemen. As it turns out, the bartender was once an English teacher. He found a lot of amusement in the double meanings of
crow bar
and
attempted murder.
 

VS

they/she
What do you get when you play country music backwards?
You get your money back and your wife back.

What do you call a mixture between an elephant and a rhino?
Elephino (Hell if I know)
 
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