Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
Glad you caught that, yes, it was supposed to say robot.
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The Adventure of Adventureness
- Thread starter Missingno. Master
- Start date
Glad you caught that, yes, it was supposed to say robot.
My all-time favorite character would have to be the narrator. xD
Jack did an okay-ish job at narrating. The narrator does a better job, in my opinion.
Jack is a rather interesting individual xD
*gasp* That was definitely uncalled for! One must not refer to another's mother in such a way! How very rude of Jack xP
Was this meant to be capitalized? I noticed that the "r" was lowercased in previous paragraphs.
Anyway, great job! It kept me laughing! This fic is enjoyable! It's nice to see they already made it to Cyber Town. (The Internet Explorer thing made me laugh xD So true. No offense to Internet Explorer.) The only thing I suggest is that Jack shouldn't slap the narrator so frequently. Instead, maybe he could use different actions, such as punching. He slaps him quite often. (Poor narrator Dx)
Anyway, EXCELLENT! =DDDDDD
Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
Thanks for catching that, no, the "r" was not supposed to be capitalized.
And the ironic thing is, I use Internet Explorer myself!
Yeah, I agree, Jack shouldn't be slapping the narrator that much. However, as you've undoubtedly noticed, Croagunk's been slowly taking over that role.
I'll try to have the next chapter up by tomorrow morning, but I can't garuntee anything. It'll definitely be up by Tuesday, though, you can be sure.
lugia*master
Cheese XD
lol, no worries Intelligence. I get really annoyed when people refer to british people like that as well. Like 'the parent trap'. Apart from crap acting on lindsey lohan's part, it was just shitty steryotipical-ness. I love the story though! ^^ As in, this story, not 'TPT'
Really?! I use FireFox. I haven't used Internet Explorer in forever.
Haha xD Yes, the Croagunk, reminding me (and this was also mentioned in the story) of Brock and his Croagunk. And no pressure on the next chapter. I'm looking forward to it =DDDD
Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
Chapter 4: The Fourth Chapter
Cyber Town, despite the name, more resembled a city, what with its numerous skyscrapers. Jack and the narrator traveled down one of the town's sidewalks, bickering as usual.
"I say we head towards that massive building!"
"And I say we start stopping people and ask them to help!"
"Sir, how do you know that these people will be any help?"
"The same way you know that building's gonna be any help!"
"Speaking of that massive building, it's right this way."
The narrator was quite right. Several blocks before them lay the large, wall-like building that had been so clearly visible when they first arrived in town. Suddenly, a balding man in a cheap suit appeared right before their eyes.
"Well, howdy, folks, and how'd you like to purchase new athlete's foot anti fungal cream? Made by the good folks at Totally Useless Productes incorpora-" The annoyance's blabbering was cut short by Jack picking up the man and tossing him into a nearby trash can.
"What in the name of some guy I've never met was THAT?!" demanded Jack.
"A pop-up, young sir," replied the dashing narrator. At that moment, a flash of light came from one of the narrator's pockets. "Oh, here we go," groaned the narrator as his Croagunk proceeded to stick his side with a Poison Jab. Grunting, the narrator picked himself up, and took Croagunk's Poké Ball out of his pocket. "Croagunk, return," he groaned, holding the ball towards aforementioned Toxic Mouth Pokémon. Croagunk was retrieved into the ball, when a young boy, about Jack's age, approached the narrator.
"Pardon me, sir, but that Croagunk of yours seems strong. How about a battle?"
"Oh, no problem," said the narrator. "Jack, would you mind being the referee?"
Jack shrugged wordlessly. The young boy and the narrator stood a good ten feet away. The narrator threw Croagunk's Poké Ball, calling "Croagunk, let's do this!" Croagunk reappeared in a flash of light. The young boy pulled his own Poké Ball out of his pocket and threw it.
"Porygon, go!"
In a flash of light, a strange Pokémon appeared. It vaguely resembled an animal of some sort, but it had no round parts. It floated in midair, its blue and white body parts shifting position slightly. "Porygon," it droned in a digital voice. As it spoke, a flurry of stars flew up around it. Jack groaned loudly as the narrator pulled out his cards and shuffled through them, finally selecting one. However, the Porygon picture on this was blue where this Porygon was white, and pink where it was blue. The narrator began to read.
"Porygon, the Virtual Pokémon. Porygon is capable of traveling through cyberspace. Because it does not need to breathe, people are eager to test its capabilities in any environment."
The narrator then looked up. "Shiny Porygon or not," he said, "You're going down! Croagunk! Cross Chop!"
Croagunk croaked menacingly, as it leapt towards Porygon, arms raised in an "X" position, hands glowing white.
"Dodge it and use Psybeam!" called the opponent. Porygon floated upwards through means unknown, allowing Croagunk to sail neatly beneath it and hit the sidewalk. Porygon then turned around and shot from its beak a bolt of multicolored light. The narrator knew that if the Psybeam hit Croagunk, it was all over. However, without even waiting for orders, Croagunk formed a black-purple orb in its mouth, and shot a blast from it. The Dark Pulse completely destroyed the Psybeam, and continued straight for Porygon.
"Use Conversion2!"
Porygon took on a brief glow, which then faded. The Dark Pulse then hit it, but didn't seem to do much. The young boy smiled. "Porygon's now of a type that resists Dark moves," he explained. The narrator thought about this. He reasoned that the types that resist Dark moves, other than Fighting, were weak to fighting. With that in mind, he called out.
"Croagunk, Focus Blast!"
Croagunk formed a blue orb between its hands, which then flew off towards Porygon. The attack hit its mark, causing an explosion. Porygon fell towards the sidewalk, and struggled to get up. However, at that point, Porygon began to glow! The young boy, the narrator, and Jack stared at it in delight, horror, and indifference, respectively, as Porygon began to change shape slightly. When the glow subsided, Porygon was gone, only for there to be a smaller, sleeker version of itself in its place. Unlike Porygon, this Pokémon had no angles. It was all rounded.
"Porygon2, the Virtual Pokémon, and the evolved form of Porygon. Although this upgraded version of Porygon was designed for usage in outer space, it cannot fly," the narrator read off another card. "However, this makes no sense. Porygon must be traded whilst holding an Up-Grade to evolve!"
"Usually," replied the opponent, "but here in Cyber Town, Porygon and Porygon2 can evolve randomly. It's all the internet and technology in the air, I think. I even saw a guy's Porygon evolve straight to Porygon-Z, completely skipping the Porygon2 stage! It-"
"Porygon2 is unable to battle," interrupted Jack. For indeed, even after evolving, Porygon2 was unable to pick its tired self up off the ground, and it fell into unconsciousness. Its distraught trainer returned it to its Poké Ball, and made to run away. However, the narrator stopped him.
"My good lad, can you by any chance point us to someone who can help us? We wish to leave the internet, you see." The boy blinked in surprise.
"Well, I wouldn't know, but you could visit the Dot Com Building. Those guys there know everything about the internet, someone there must know about leaving it."
"And where is the Dot Com Building?"
The boy pointed right at the tremendous building a few blocks down. "It's huge, you can't possibly miss it," he said. With that, he walked away.
The narrator returned Croagunk to its ball, turned to Jack with a smug grin on his face and opened his mouth. However, Jack beat him; "If you so much as THINK the words 'I told you so', I'll use you as target practice when I'm teaching my Primeape Close Combat!"
So in silence, the two of them set off for the Dot Com Building.
"Well?" demanded Missingno. Master. "What news?"
"Everything going according to plan, sir," answered the young boy who had battled the narrator previously, through the computer screen. "They're headed for the Dot Com Building, and my sources tell me that the traps are set."
"Good, good," chuckled Missingno. Master. "That's very good."
The two of them then began laughing maniacally, plotting their evil plot.
----------------------
End of Chapter 4. Please rate.
Cyber Town, despite the name, more resembled a city, what with its numerous skyscrapers. Jack and the narrator traveled down one of the town's sidewalks, bickering as usual.
"I say we head towards that massive building!"
"And I say we start stopping people and ask them to help!"
"Sir, how do you know that these people will be any help?"
"The same way you know that building's gonna be any help!"
"Speaking of that massive building, it's right this way."
The narrator was quite right. Several blocks before them lay the large, wall-like building that had been so clearly visible when they first arrived in town. Suddenly, a balding man in a cheap suit appeared right before their eyes.
"Well, howdy, folks, and how'd you like to purchase new athlete's foot anti fungal cream? Made by the good folks at Totally Useless Productes incorpora-" The annoyance's blabbering was cut short by Jack picking up the man and tossing him into a nearby trash can.
"What in the name of some guy I've never met was THAT?!" demanded Jack.
"A pop-up, young sir," replied the dashing narrator. At that moment, a flash of light came from one of the narrator's pockets. "Oh, here we go," groaned the narrator as his Croagunk proceeded to stick his side with a Poison Jab. Grunting, the narrator picked himself up, and took Croagunk's Poké Ball out of his pocket. "Croagunk, return," he groaned, holding the ball towards aforementioned Toxic Mouth Pokémon. Croagunk was retrieved into the ball, when a young boy, about Jack's age, approached the narrator.
"Pardon me, sir, but that Croagunk of yours seems strong. How about a battle?"
"Oh, no problem," said the narrator. "Jack, would you mind being the referee?"
Jack shrugged wordlessly. The young boy and the narrator stood a good ten feet away. The narrator threw Croagunk's Poké Ball, calling "Croagunk, let's do this!" Croagunk reappeared in a flash of light. The young boy pulled his own Poké Ball out of his pocket and threw it.
"Porygon, go!"
In a flash of light, a strange Pokémon appeared. It vaguely resembled an animal of some sort, but it had no round parts. It floated in midair, its blue and white body parts shifting position slightly. "Porygon," it droned in a digital voice. As it spoke, a flurry of stars flew up around it. Jack groaned loudly as the narrator pulled out his cards and shuffled through them, finally selecting one. However, the Porygon picture on this was blue where this Porygon was white, and pink where it was blue. The narrator began to read.
"Porygon, the Virtual Pokémon. Porygon is capable of traveling through cyberspace. Because it does not need to breathe, people are eager to test its capabilities in any environment."
The narrator then looked up. "Shiny Porygon or not," he said, "You're going down! Croagunk! Cross Chop!"
Croagunk croaked menacingly, as it leapt towards Porygon, arms raised in an "X" position, hands glowing white.
"Dodge it and use Psybeam!" called the opponent. Porygon floated upwards through means unknown, allowing Croagunk to sail neatly beneath it and hit the sidewalk. Porygon then turned around and shot from its beak a bolt of multicolored light. The narrator knew that if the Psybeam hit Croagunk, it was all over. However, without even waiting for orders, Croagunk formed a black-purple orb in its mouth, and shot a blast from it. The Dark Pulse completely destroyed the Psybeam, and continued straight for Porygon.
"Use Conversion2!"
Porygon took on a brief glow, which then faded. The Dark Pulse then hit it, but didn't seem to do much. The young boy smiled. "Porygon's now of a type that resists Dark moves," he explained. The narrator thought about this. He reasoned that the types that resist Dark moves, other than Fighting, were weak to fighting. With that in mind, he called out.
"Croagunk, Focus Blast!"
Croagunk formed a blue orb between its hands, which then flew off towards Porygon. The attack hit its mark, causing an explosion. Porygon fell towards the sidewalk, and struggled to get up. However, at that point, Porygon began to glow! The young boy, the narrator, and Jack stared at it in delight, horror, and indifference, respectively, as Porygon began to change shape slightly. When the glow subsided, Porygon was gone, only for there to be a smaller, sleeker version of itself in its place. Unlike Porygon, this Pokémon had no angles. It was all rounded.
"Porygon2, the Virtual Pokémon, and the evolved form of Porygon. Although this upgraded version of Porygon was designed for usage in outer space, it cannot fly," the narrator read off another card. "However, this makes no sense. Porygon must be traded whilst holding an Up-Grade to evolve!"
"Usually," replied the opponent, "but here in Cyber Town, Porygon and Porygon2 can evolve randomly. It's all the internet and technology in the air, I think. I even saw a guy's Porygon evolve straight to Porygon-Z, completely skipping the Porygon2 stage! It-"
"Porygon2 is unable to battle," interrupted Jack. For indeed, even after evolving, Porygon2 was unable to pick its tired self up off the ground, and it fell into unconsciousness. Its distraught trainer returned it to its Poké Ball, and made to run away. However, the narrator stopped him.
"My good lad, can you by any chance point us to someone who can help us? We wish to leave the internet, you see." The boy blinked in surprise.
"Well, I wouldn't know, but you could visit the Dot Com Building. Those guys there know everything about the internet, someone there must know about leaving it."
"And where is the Dot Com Building?"
The boy pointed right at the tremendous building a few blocks down. "It's huge, you can't possibly miss it," he said. With that, he walked away.
The narrator returned Croagunk to its ball, turned to Jack with a smug grin on his face and opened his mouth. However, Jack beat him; "If you so much as THINK the words 'I told you so', I'll use you as target practice when I'm teaching my Primeape Close Combat!"
So in silence, the two of them set off for the Dot Com Building.
"Well?" demanded Missingno. Master. "What news?"
"Everything going according to plan, sir," answered the young boy who had battled the narrator previously, through the computer screen. "They're headed for the Dot Com Building, and my sources tell me that the traps are set."
"Good, good," chuckled Missingno. Master. "That's very good."
The two of them then began laughing maniacally, plotting their evil plot.
----------------------
End of Chapter 4. Please rate.
*The narrator's Croagunk is revealed to know Cross Chop, Dark Pulse, and Focus Blast.
Last edited:
SerenadeSP
My Loyal Feraligatr
Ah! I read this a few days ago but forgot to post >_<
Just a random question, was there any reason you made the Porygon shiny or did you just do it because you felt like it?
I love the clever internet and story jokes you come up with. This one is my second favorite so far(first one being Jack narrating, that was funny).
Ha, you brought up something that always bothered me in the Anime - When a Pokemon gets totally destoried in battle, evolves, and then is suddenly fully healed. I wish that happened in the games.
XD that figures
Just a random question, was there any reason you made the Porygon shiny or did you just do it because you felt like it?
Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
If you like them now, just wait. There's quite a few more to come.
Yeah, you always assume that when a Pokemon evolves, it's gonna be ready to go. I like to be unpredictable.
Just felt like making the Porygon shiny.
Sorry I haven't been working on this lately, I've been on vacation, and very busy afterwards. And I'm starting college tomorrow, and that ain't helping. I'll try and see if I can get up Chapter 5 within a week, but I can't make any garuntees.
Deadly.Braviary
Well-Known Member
lolz, I like it. Good descriptions of characters, only problem is, you didn't give a description for the boy at all.
There are no words.
There seriously aren't any words I can think of that describes how awesome this is. If it didn't hurt me to laugh for some mysterious reason and the muscles around my knee weren't damaged, I assure you I would be on the floor laughing. As Silver pointed out, there wasn't any description of Jack, but is that simply meant to mean that Jack is a stand-in for armies of newbie Pokémon Trainers or what? Sorry I can't say more, this is pretty obviously a comedy story and I can't find any typoes in it.
KEEP GOING STRONG! (please?)
There seriously aren't any words I can think of that describes how awesome this is. If it didn't hurt me to laugh for some mysterious reason and the muscles around my knee weren't damaged, I assure you I would be on the floor laughing. As Silver pointed out, there wasn't any description of Jack, but is that simply meant to mean that Jack is a stand-in for armies of newbie Pokémon Trainers or what? Sorry I can't say more, this is pretty obviously a comedy story and I can't find any typoes in it.
KEEP GOING STRONG! (please?)
Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
Truly, I sincerely apologize for the lack of updates. College has been eating my time like Pac-Man eats dots. Believe me, I want to put up new chapters just as much as you want to see them.
I've been working on chapter 5 in what little spare time I had, and it's not done yet. I will attempt to have it up within the next week, but again, I can't garuntee a thing. Just please know that I have not forgotten this.
I've been working on chapter 5 in what little spare time I had, and it's not done yet. I will attempt to have it up within the next week, but again, I can't garuntee a thing. Just please know that I have not forgotten this.
Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
Told you I haven't forgotten this.
Truly I apologize for the insanely and ridiculously long wait for this chapter. I've had more distractions over the past 10 months than I could've predicted. And now, without further ado, chapter 5!
Chapter 5: The Chapter You've Been Waiting Almost A Year For
The wall-esque Dot Com Building loomed before Jack and the narrator. They stood before the building, not yet going in. Although, this was not so much out of nervousness as it was due to the fact that the two of them were dead tired.
"Finally, w-we made it," panted Jack. "Damn building seemed so close when we started. I swear, it must have taken us ten months to reach this thing!"
"I'll agree with you there," gasped the narrator, who was still amazingly studly in spite of all the sweat. As Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball to assault its trainer, Jack looked up at the building. It looked even larger up close, which Jack hadn't thought possible.
"How the freakin' hell are we supposed to find what we're looking for in this insane building?! It's huge! It'll take us another ten months just to explore the place!"
"Well," grunted the narrator, still reeling from his Croagunk's Poison Jab, "There's one way to find out." With that, the narrator walked through the automatic doors. Jack, rolling his eyes for no particular reason, followed.
The Dot Com Building's lobby was large and fancy. In his mind, Jack compared it to a real fancy hotel's lobby. Up ahead, there stood a highly polished wooden desk, with a cute woman behind it. The desk was empty, save for a wooden carving of a Vibrava. Jack looked at the narrator, who was straightening his bow tie. He then turned to Jack and handed him a Poké Ball.
"Jack, would you please ensure that Croagunk doesn't interrupt?" asked the narrator. Jack nodded and took Croagunk's Poké Ball. The narrator then arrived at the desk and proceeded to flirt with the receptionist. As if on cue, Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball, and gave Jack a look. Jack nodded, grinning evilly. Croagunk returned the grin, bounded over to the narrator with surprising speed, and Poison Jabbed him. Croagunk then dragged its trainer away. The receptionist looked on, slightly amused. Jack then approached the desk.
"Sorry about that," said Jack. "Anyway, could you possibly help us? We're looking for a way out of the internet."
"Why, certainly, young man," answered the receptionist. "I- did you say you're looking for a way out of the internet?"
"...Yes, I did," answered Jack. The receptionist seemed to be acting rather odd all of a sudden.
"...So, you must be Jack, and that flirt machine over there must be the narrator."
"...Yes, we are."
"Ah, OK," answered the receptionist. Then, as casually as possible, she reached for the wooden Vibrava carving, turned it upside down, and pressed a large red button on it. The effect was immediate. Red lights flashed on and off all over the lobby. A siren blared loud and long.
"Not good," muttered the gorgeous narrator to Jack. As Croagunk proceeded to attack the narrator, Jack looked up in alarm, having heard a sinister whirring noise. The noise was caused by numerous ceiling tiles sliding open. Jack braced himself, knowing something was going to fall through. Sure enough, through each tile fell a spherical purple Pokémon, each of them emitting yellow gas. Beneath each Pokémon's face, their bodies bore a skull and crossbones symbol. Instead of hitting the ground, the Pokémon all stopped in midair and hovered in place. Next to Jack, the narrator struggled to his feet while shuffling through his Pokémon cards. He then pulled out one bearing a picture of their assailants. The narrator read from the card.
"Koffing, the Poison Gas Pokémon. Koffing feeds on rotten kitchen garbage. It stores various toxic gases in its body, and may-" However, the narrator was interrupted at that point, for a Koffing immediately to his left exploded without warning, knocking Jack and the narrator to the floor.
"...explode.... without.... warning..." the narrator gasped, reading the last three words on the card. The duo managed to climb back on their feet. Jack pulled out Primeape's Great Ball, as the narrator readied two Poké Balls. The two faced each other, nodded, and threw all three balls simultaneously. "GO!" they yelled together. In flashes of light, Primeape, Chatot, and Croagunk materialized, and looked around at their opponents. Almost immediately, all the Koffing started spewing streams of rancid, black gunk at the new arrivals. Jack reacted immediately.
"Primeape, Fury Swipes!" he ordered. Immediately, Primeape began clawing at the air so fast that its hands became blurs. The three or four Sludge attacks could not get past Primeape's rapidly moving hands. The narrator's Pokémon weren't so lucky. Chatot was already knocked out. Croagunk, on the other hand, actually seemed to enjoy being splattered with Sludge. Jack then gasped. "LOOK!" he shouted. The narrator turned to face the direction Jack was pointing, and saw that the receptionist had fled, undoubtedly aware of Koffing's explosive nature. "Look on the floor, dummy," snarled Jack. The narrator looked down and saw a metallic cube with a large red button on one side; the receptionist undoubtedly must have dropped it in her haste to escape. "A plot device!" gasped the narrator. Without thinking, the narrator dove under a Koffing, grabbed the little cube, and jammed his thumb on the button.
BOOOM!
Almost immediately, all the Koffing exploded.
As the narrator got back up, he saw that Jack had returned Primeape to its Poké Ball. Croagunk was a little stunned, but otherwise seemed okay. Jack, however, was glaring at the narrator.
"You IDIOT! You incompetent, self-glorifying imbecile!" roared Jack.
"Oh, do calm down," snapped the narrator. "If you'll care to notice, all the Koffing are unconscious, and thus no longer a threat." Jack grunted in response, then pulled out a Poké Ball.
"What are you doing?" asked the handsome narrator. As Croagunk lunged towards its trainer, glowing hand first, Jack replied,
"I did always want one of these, so why not? Poké Ball, go!" Jack lobbed the ball at one of the Koffing. On contact, the ball split open and converted the Koffing into red energy, which was then sucked into the ball. The ball hit the floor and began wobbling. Several seconds later, it became still, indicating that the capture was successful. Jack picked up his Poké Ball as the narrator picked up himself.
"So what do we do now?" asked Jack.
"Well, this may be of some help to us," replied the narrator, pointing at a sign hanging near a hallway entrance.
"www.google.com- search engine," Jack read aloud. "Well, a search engine may help us find a way out of the internet. Lead the way, then."
The narrator started down the hallway, and Jack followed. Snickering to himself, Jack decided against telling the narrator that the explosion had singed off the seat of his pants, revealing his yellow and pink striped boxer shorts for all the world to see.
--------------------------
End chapter 5
Again, I apologize for the ridiculous wait for this chapter. I hope you'll find this chapter worth the wait.
Truly I apologize for the insanely and ridiculously long wait for this chapter. I've had more distractions over the past 10 months than I could've predicted. And now, without further ado, chapter 5!
Chapter 5: The Chapter You've Been Waiting Almost A Year For
The wall-esque Dot Com Building loomed before Jack and the narrator. They stood before the building, not yet going in. Although, this was not so much out of nervousness as it was due to the fact that the two of them were dead tired.
"Finally, w-we made it," panted Jack. "Damn building seemed so close when we started. I swear, it must have taken us ten months to reach this thing!"
"I'll agree with you there," gasped the narrator, who was still amazingly studly in spite of all the sweat. As Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball to assault its trainer, Jack looked up at the building. It looked even larger up close, which Jack hadn't thought possible.
"How the freakin' hell are we supposed to find what we're looking for in this insane building?! It's huge! It'll take us another ten months just to explore the place!"
"Well," grunted the narrator, still reeling from his Croagunk's Poison Jab, "There's one way to find out." With that, the narrator walked through the automatic doors. Jack, rolling his eyes for no particular reason, followed.
The Dot Com Building's lobby was large and fancy. In his mind, Jack compared it to a real fancy hotel's lobby. Up ahead, there stood a highly polished wooden desk, with a cute woman behind it. The desk was empty, save for a wooden carving of a Vibrava. Jack looked at the narrator, who was straightening his bow tie. He then turned to Jack and handed him a Poké Ball.
"Jack, would you please ensure that Croagunk doesn't interrupt?" asked the narrator. Jack nodded and took Croagunk's Poké Ball. The narrator then arrived at the desk and proceeded to flirt with the receptionist. As if on cue, Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball, and gave Jack a look. Jack nodded, grinning evilly. Croagunk returned the grin, bounded over to the narrator with surprising speed, and Poison Jabbed him. Croagunk then dragged its trainer away. The receptionist looked on, slightly amused. Jack then approached the desk.
"Sorry about that," said Jack. "Anyway, could you possibly help us? We're looking for a way out of the internet."
"Why, certainly, young man," answered the receptionist. "I- did you say you're looking for a way out of the internet?"
"...Yes, I did," answered Jack. The receptionist seemed to be acting rather odd all of a sudden.
"...So, you must be Jack, and that flirt machine over there must be the narrator."
"...Yes, we are."
"Ah, OK," answered the receptionist. Then, as casually as possible, she reached for the wooden Vibrava carving, turned it upside down, and pressed a large red button on it. The effect was immediate. Red lights flashed on and off all over the lobby. A siren blared loud and long.
"Not good," muttered the gorgeous narrator to Jack. As Croagunk proceeded to attack the narrator, Jack looked up in alarm, having heard a sinister whirring noise. The noise was caused by numerous ceiling tiles sliding open. Jack braced himself, knowing something was going to fall through. Sure enough, through each tile fell a spherical purple Pokémon, each of them emitting yellow gas. Beneath each Pokémon's face, their bodies bore a skull and crossbones symbol. Instead of hitting the ground, the Pokémon all stopped in midair and hovered in place. Next to Jack, the narrator struggled to his feet while shuffling through his Pokémon cards. He then pulled out one bearing a picture of their assailants. The narrator read from the card.
"Koffing, the Poison Gas Pokémon. Koffing feeds on rotten kitchen garbage. It stores various toxic gases in its body, and may-" However, the narrator was interrupted at that point, for a Koffing immediately to his left exploded without warning, knocking Jack and the narrator to the floor.
"...explode.... without.... warning..." the narrator gasped, reading the last three words on the card. The duo managed to climb back on their feet. Jack pulled out Primeape's Great Ball, as the narrator readied two Poké Balls. The two faced each other, nodded, and threw all three balls simultaneously. "GO!" they yelled together. In flashes of light, Primeape, Chatot, and Croagunk materialized, and looked around at their opponents. Almost immediately, all the Koffing started spewing streams of rancid, black gunk at the new arrivals. Jack reacted immediately.
"Primeape, Fury Swipes!" he ordered. Immediately, Primeape began clawing at the air so fast that its hands became blurs. The three or four Sludge attacks could not get past Primeape's rapidly moving hands. The narrator's Pokémon weren't so lucky. Chatot was already knocked out. Croagunk, on the other hand, actually seemed to enjoy being splattered with Sludge. Jack then gasped. "LOOK!" he shouted. The narrator turned to face the direction Jack was pointing, and saw that the receptionist had fled, undoubtedly aware of Koffing's explosive nature. "Look on the floor, dummy," snarled Jack. The narrator looked down and saw a metallic cube with a large red button on one side; the receptionist undoubtedly must have dropped it in her haste to escape. "A plot device!" gasped the narrator. Without thinking, the narrator dove under a Koffing, grabbed the little cube, and jammed his thumb on the button.
BOOOM!
Almost immediately, all the Koffing exploded.
As the narrator got back up, he saw that Jack had returned Primeape to its Poké Ball. Croagunk was a little stunned, but otherwise seemed okay. Jack, however, was glaring at the narrator.
"You IDIOT! You incompetent, self-glorifying imbecile!" roared Jack.
"Oh, do calm down," snapped the narrator. "If you'll care to notice, all the Koffing are unconscious, and thus no longer a threat." Jack grunted in response, then pulled out a Poké Ball.
"What are you doing?" asked the handsome narrator. As Croagunk lunged towards its trainer, glowing hand first, Jack replied,
"I did always want one of these, so why not? Poké Ball, go!" Jack lobbed the ball at one of the Koffing. On contact, the ball split open and converted the Koffing into red energy, which was then sucked into the ball. The ball hit the floor and began wobbling. Several seconds later, it became still, indicating that the capture was successful. Jack picked up his Poké Ball as the narrator picked up himself.
"So what do we do now?" asked Jack.
"Well, this may be of some help to us," replied the narrator, pointing at a sign hanging near a hallway entrance.
"www.google.com- search engine," Jack read aloud. "Well, a search engine may help us find a way out of the internet. Lead the way, then."
The narrator started down the hallway, and Jack followed. Snickering to himself, Jack decided against telling the narrator that the explosion had singed off the seat of his pants, revealing his yellow and pink striped boxer shorts for all the world to see.
--------------------------
End chapter 5
*Jack catches a Koffing.
*A gigantic hole is formed in the seat of the narrator's pants.
*A gigantic hole is formed in the seat of the narrator's pants.
Again, I apologize for the ridiculous wait for this chapter. I hope you'll find this chapter worth the wait.
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SerenadeSP
My Loyal Feraligatr
Holy crap, it's back!! *throws a party*
When I first read this I thought it said '...that the two of them were dead."
XD that explains that.
Of course, it had to be done.
I think you meant "Beneath".
I don't think I said this before but I love how plot devices are just boxes with a button on it. It makes it seem so simple.
Just a small mistake, one of the two is not needed.
When in doubt, google it.
Glad this is back. Did I ask to be on a PM List? If not, I will now.
When I first read this I thought it said '...that the two of them were dead."
XD that explains that.
Of course, it had to be done.
Paragraph 14 said:
I think you meant "Beneath".
I don't think I said this before but I love how plot devices are just boxes with a button on it. It makes it seem so simple.
Paragraph 23 & 24 said:
Just a small mistake, one of the two is not needed.
When in doubt, google it.
Glad this is back. Did I ask to be on a PM List? If not, I will now.
Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
Holy crap, it's back!! *throws a party*
When I first read this I thought it said '...that the two of them were dead."
XD that explains that.
Of course, it had to be done.
I think you meant "Beneath".
I don't think I said this before but I love how plot devices are just boxes with a button on it. It makes it seem so simple.
Just a small mistake, one of the two is not needed.
When in doubt, google it.
Glad this is back. Did I ask to be on a PM List? If not, I will now.
Mistakes are corrected, glad you like the chapter.
Never thought about starting a PM list for this, but that's a good idea. You're on the list.
And the next chapter should be up within the week, though I can't make any promises. Well, okay, I can make this promise- you won't have to wait another ten months for the next one!
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Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
...And here we are!
Chapter 6: The Chapter With A Really, Really Long, Rambling, And Nonsensical Title, Intended To Kill Time And Generally Act As A Fail Attempt At Humor.
.....
.....
.....
"...Hey."
.....
"HEY!"
"What? What is it?"
"The chapter's started. Start narrating already!"
"What? It has? You mean that we've reached the end of that dreadfully long chapter title?"
"Yeah. SO WHY AREN'T YOU NARRATING?!"
"Hey, this walking can wear a narrator out. Do me a favor, why don't you narrate for a while?"
'Oh, fine, you wuss,' snapped the intellectually superior Jack. The dumb narrator rolled his eyes.
"Sir, if I may-"
"NO, YOU MAY NOT!"
"But that first sentence you narrated, it's wrapped in apostrophes, rather than quotatio-"
"SHUT UP!" roared Jack. The narrator fell silent, as he should.
After not long enough, the underqualified narrator spoke again, against all that is right.
"First off, lay off the insults. Second, don't you find it odd that we have yet to encounter any more traps?"
"Huh," muttered Jack. "For once in your life, you may have something here. We've been walking down this hallway for ages now, and nothing."
"I'm betting they didn't expect us to get past those Koffing, remarked the narrator. "And you forgot that last quotation mark."
Jack was just opening his mouth to respond in all caps, when suddenly, a hole opened up in the ceiling before them. Through the hole fell a Pokémon that could only be described as a large Poké Ball with eyes. Jack groaned as the all-too-stupid narrator pulled out those damned strips of cardboard, shuffled them in his annoying way, and pulled out one bearing a picture of the thing before them.
"Alright, I'll take over the narrating once more," snapped the narrator, "And Voltorb, the Ball Pokémon. Voltorb was first discovered in a Poké Ball factory, and it is rumored that this was more than coincidence. It is prone to exploding suddenly, violently, and without provocation."
"So this thing can explode?" asked Jack, rather nervously.
"That's right," replied the hot narrator.
As Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball to Poison Jab its trainer, Jack began backing up slowly. The Voltorb before them narrowed its eyes and began to crackle with electricity. As the narrator pulled himself to his feet, he called out, "Croagunk, use Dark Pulse!"
Croagunk croaked loudly, as it formed a dark orb in its mouth, then shot a beam of energy from it. In response, Voltorb began spinning very fast, and it headed towards Croagunk. The Dark Pulse was deflected by the sheer speed of the Gyro Ball attack. The narrator then called for a Cross Chop. As Croagunk's crossed arms made contact with Voltorb, it stopped spinning, and rolled backwards a little bit. All of a sudden, Voltorb began to glow!
"Uh-oh," muttered Jack, "is it about to explode?"
"I don't think so," responded the narrator. "I think it's evolving!"
Sure enough, the glowing sphere could be seen growing larger, until it was roughly the size of an overinflated exercise ball. The glow subsided, revealing what appeared to be a larger, upside-down Voltorb, with smaller eyes, and a huge, almost maniacal grin. Its white teeth showed brilliantly against the red bottom half of its body. Predictably, the narrator shuffled through his Pokémon cards again, and pulled out one with a picture of the Pokémon before them and began to read.
"Electrode, the Ball Pokémon, and the evolved form of Voltorb. Electrode feeds on electricity, and is prone to exploding with even more violence and unpredictability than Voltorb. Trainers are advised to use extreme caution when handling."
"So let me get this straight," said Jack. "This thing is basically a living bomb and the embodiment of instability?"
"Yep."
As if in response, Electrode began sparking with electricity. A thin stream of smoke began to rise from it. Slowly, it began to glow. Jack and the narrator both knew that it was readying a massive Explosion attack.
"I knew we should've used Bing," muttered Jack.
"RUN!" screamed the studly narrator.
The duo turned to run, with Croagunk hot on their heels, attempting to Poison Jab the narrator. Behind them, Electrode exploded.
The blast rocked the entire Dot Com Building, as Jack, the narrator, and Croagunk all ran back into the lobby. Without even slowing down, they dashed down another hallway.
Once they were a good distance down the hallway, they finally stopped.
"I.. I think we're safe now-URK!" gasped the narrator as Croagunk finally attacked. As the narrator returned Croagunk to its Poké Ball, Jack gazed at a nearby door.
"Jack? What are you looking at?" inquired the hot, sexy, studly, and all around gorgeous narrator. Jack did not immediately answer, for at the sound of the narrator's barrage of self-glorification, Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball once more, both hands glowing purple, and used both hands to Poison Jab the narrator repeatedly. As the narrator struggled to get up, Jack smiled and said,
"This may not be a way out of the internet, but I'm betting we may find out more about this Missingno. Master guy." And he pointed at the plate on the door.
It read, "Bulbapedia".
---------------------
End chapter 6.
Chapter 6: The Chapter With A Really, Really Long, Rambling, And Nonsensical Title, Intended To Kill Time And Generally Act As A Fail Attempt At Humor.
.....
.....
.....
"...Hey."
.....
"HEY!"
"What? What is it?"
"The chapter's started. Start narrating already!"
"What? It has? You mean that we've reached the end of that dreadfully long chapter title?"
"Yeah. SO WHY AREN'T YOU NARRATING?!"
"Hey, this walking can wear a narrator out. Do me a favor, why don't you narrate for a while?"
'Oh, fine, you wuss,' snapped the intellectually superior Jack. The dumb narrator rolled his eyes.
"Sir, if I may-"
"NO, YOU MAY NOT!"
"But that first sentence you narrated, it's wrapped in apostrophes, rather than quotatio-"
"SHUT UP!" roared Jack. The narrator fell silent, as he should.
After not long enough, the underqualified narrator spoke again, against all that is right.
"First off, lay off the insults. Second, don't you find it odd that we have yet to encounter any more traps?"
"Huh," muttered Jack. "For once in your life, you may have something here. We've been walking down this hallway for ages now, and nothing."
"I'm betting they didn't expect us to get past those Koffing, remarked the narrator. "And you forgot that last quotation mark."
Jack was just opening his mouth to respond in all caps, when suddenly, a hole opened up in the ceiling before them. Through the hole fell a Pokémon that could only be described as a large Poké Ball with eyes. Jack groaned as the all-too-stupid narrator pulled out those damned strips of cardboard, shuffled them in his annoying way, and pulled out one bearing a picture of the thing before them.
"Alright, I'll take over the narrating once more," snapped the narrator, "And Voltorb, the Ball Pokémon. Voltorb was first discovered in a Poké Ball factory, and it is rumored that this was more than coincidence. It is prone to exploding suddenly, violently, and without provocation."
"So this thing can explode?" asked Jack, rather nervously.
"That's right," replied the hot narrator.
As Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball to Poison Jab its trainer, Jack began backing up slowly. The Voltorb before them narrowed its eyes and began to crackle with electricity. As the narrator pulled himself to his feet, he called out, "Croagunk, use Dark Pulse!"
Croagunk croaked loudly, as it formed a dark orb in its mouth, then shot a beam of energy from it. In response, Voltorb began spinning very fast, and it headed towards Croagunk. The Dark Pulse was deflected by the sheer speed of the Gyro Ball attack. The narrator then called for a Cross Chop. As Croagunk's crossed arms made contact with Voltorb, it stopped spinning, and rolled backwards a little bit. All of a sudden, Voltorb began to glow!
"Uh-oh," muttered Jack, "is it about to explode?"
"I don't think so," responded the narrator. "I think it's evolving!"
Sure enough, the glowing sphere could be seen growing larger, until it was roughly the size of an overinflated exercise ball. The glow subsided, revealing what appeared to be a larger, upside-down Voltorb, with smaller eyes, and a huge, almost maniacal grin. Its white teeth showed brilliantly against the red bottom half of its body. Predictably, the narrator shuffled through his Pokémon cards again, and pulled out one with a picture of the Pokémon before them and began to read.
"Electrode, the Ball Pokémon, and the evolved form of Voltorb. Electrode feeds on electricity, and is prone to exploding with even more violence and unpredictability than Voltorb. Trainers are advised to use extreme caution when handling."
"So let me get this straight," said Jack. "This thing is basically a living bomb and the embodiment of instability?"
"Yep."
As if in response, Electrode began sparking with electricity. A thin stream of smoke began to rise from it. Slowly, it began to glow. Jack and the narrator both knew that it was readying a massive Explosion attack.
"I knew we should've used Bing," muttered Jack.
"RUN!" screamed the studly narrator.
The duo turned to run, with Croagunk hot on their heels, attempting to Poison Jab the narrator. Behind them, Electrode exploded.
The blast rocked the entire Dot Com Building, as Jack, the narrator, and Croagunk all ran back into the lobby. Without even slowing down, they dashed down another hallway.
Once they were a good distance down the hallway, they finally stopped.
"I.. I think we're safe now-URK!" gasped the narrator as Croagunk finally attacked. As the narrator returned Croagunk to its Poké Ball, Jack gazed at a nearby door.
"Jack? What are you looking at?" inquired the hot, sexy, studly, and all around gorgeous narrator. Jack did not immediately answer, for at the sound of the narrator's barrage of self-glorification, Croagunk emerged from its Poké Ball once more, both hands glowing purple, and used both hands to Poison Jab the narrator repeatedly. As the narrator struggled to get up, Jack smiled and said,
"This may not be a way out of the internet, but I'm betting we may find out more about this Missingno. Master guy." And he pointed at the plate on the door.
It read, "Bulbapedia".
---------------------
End chapter 6.
*Jack narrates temporarily.
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SerenadeSP
My Loyal Feraligatr
This is the most amazing chapter title I have ever seen.
That won me over. XD Oh god, Jack's narrating again.
He really doesn't like the narrator does he?
Never mind. THAT won me over. XD
Paragraph 26 said:
Used the same word twice in the same sentence.
XD Hopefully Bing isn't rigged to explode too. Now they're going to Bulbapedia? This ought to be good.
That is my favourite line in the fic! I should probably introduce myself, I am Charoshi and have been a closet fan for a while now. I've gone into little fits of laughter quite often reading your story. It is one of the funniest ones I've ever read. I got pretty excited when I saw you posted another chapter. I can't wait for the next one.
Sincerely,
Your ex-closet fan, Charoshi
Missingno. Master
Poison-type Trainer
Glad you liked it. Also, I apologize for not sending a PM when I posted the chapter. I still gotta get used to the fact that this fic has a PM list now.
Glad you like the story! Next chapter should be up, maybe by Saturday, possibly sooner, I dunno.
Or it could be up right now.
Chapter 7: The Chapter After The Chapter With The Really Long Name That Fails At Humor.
"Oh, thank Arceus the chapter title's not that long this time!"
"Will you shut it? And start narrating!"
"That seems a bit contradictory, sir."
"JUST NARRATE!"
"But I'm tired, sir. In case you've forgotten, we've had to outrun a damn Electrode in the last chapter!"
"Well, I'm not narrating again!"
"Oh, I know! Chatot, go!"
"Squaaak! What do you want?"
"Chatot, would you kindly narrate this chapter for me?"
"Squaaak! Alrighty then," answered the Chatot, who was perfect in every way.
"OK, and we have another problem here," grunted the apelike Jack. "This door to Bulbapedia won't open!" Then he pulled out a miniature prison and enlarged it to full size. "I'm gonna have Koffing break down the doo- did Chatot just say 'miniature prison'?
"Awwk! Indeed I did," answered the always correct Chatot, who was always right, and twice as sexy as his trainer. "Those things are inescapable!"
"If I may interrupt," interrupted the narrator, "first, that usage of 'interrupted' was rather redundant. And second, if they're so inescapable, how is it that Croagunk always manages to escape his when I refer to myself as the sexy stud that I am?"
As if on cue, Croagunk emerged from its spherical prison in a flash of light.
"Oh, come on," groaned the narrator, "I wasn't even narrati-EEEEEEEEEEE!" For the narrator's complaint was drowned out by his own screech of pain, as a bundle of poison-tipped fingers stuck themselves into the narrator's side.
"I tire of this," muttered Jack, and he threw the sphere of doom. "Koffing, GO!" From its prison came Koffing, who hovered in the air, now conscious, but still rather battered from its recent explosion.
"...Hang on a second!" grunted the narrator, as he picked himself up and reimprisoned Croagunk. "Koffing was part of a trap set by Missingno. Master, right?"
"Yeah..."
"So let's use Koffing to find out more about Missingno. Master!"
"How do you think we can- OH!" exclaimed Jack. "OH! That's right! Chatot can translate for us!" Chatot nodded proudly. Without further ado, Jack began talking to Koffing.
"Alright, Koffing, tell us what you know about Missingno. Master Including his weaknesses and how we can get to him."
"Koffing, Koff Koff Koffing. Koffing Koffing Koff. Koffing!"
"Awwk!" squawked Chatot. "Koffing says that Missingno. Master has no weaknesses that he knows of, and that he is outside the internet. To get to him, we must exit the internet."
Jack rolled his eyes. "Koffing, that's what we already know so far. Anything ELSE?!"
"Koffing Koffing, Koffing Koff Koffing."
"Awwk! Koffing says that you're extremely pushy, and that the word 'please' wouldn't kill you."
"RRRRRGH!" Jack was now looking furious. The narrator would not have been surprised to see smoke pouring from his ears. And then, teeth gritted, as if it was an impossible effort, Jack grunted the word "Please.". And then he collapsed and moved no more.
"K-k-k-koffing Koff...." muttered Koffing.
"Awwk! Koffing says, 'Well, I could've been wrong...'."
"It's alright," said the narrator. "Jack's fine, he's just passed out. But I think that in the future, we should definitely refrain from forcing him into politeness. From the looks of things, it really could kill him." Koffing then turned to Chatot and began talking. Chatot translated:
"Awwk! Koffing says that he doesn't know about exiting the internet, but he does know how he entered the internet, and that may be a start. On the seventh floor, there's a room marked "Writing room", where everything that gets written into this story comes into existance. Awwk!"
"But I would remember this," protested the narrator. "After all, I was written into the story as well."
"Awwk! Seems it only applies to stuff written into the story after the Dot Com Building was."
At that point, Jack began to stir. He slowly got to his feet and mumbled "Woah.... What happened?"
"You said 'please' and passed out, sir," replied the narrator. "And Chatot, return. I'm feeling better now, I'll take over the narrating." And the studly narrator held out Chatot's Poké Ball to return him. However, at that moment, Croagunk re-exited its own Poké Ball, and did what it does.
"What did I miss?" asked Jack as the narrator struggled to stand up.
"Ugh... We need to go to the seventh floor. Room called the Writing Room. Everything that was written into this story after the Dot Com Building spawned in that room. It may not be an exit, but it's an entrance."
"Eh, so much can go wrong with this," replied Jack, "But it's our only lead. Let's go."
Returning their Pokémon to their Poké Balls, Jack and the narrator began walking down the hallway.
"Jack?"
"Yeah, what?"
"How are we going to get up to the seventh floor?"
Jack stared at the narrator as if he were stupid, which he clearly wasn't, as he was too studly and sexy to be stupid. "Are you kidding me?! Just NOW you think of that?! Croagunk, hold your fire, I got this one covered." For Croagunk had indeed emerged from its Poké Ball, and was already aiming a Poison Jab. At Jack's words, it stopped and looked at him expectantly. Jack made a fist and drew it back.
"Oh, dear," squeaked the narrator.
BAM!
With incredible force, Jack delivered an astonishing uppercut, which actually managed to lift the narrator off the ground. Not only that, it actually propelled him further upwards and through the ceiling!
"Wow," commented Jack. "I couldn't have done that better if there was a plot device involved!"
"Ugh. Yes, yes, that's all fine. But look! I'm on the second floor now!" exclaimed the narrator.
"Ah, I see what your plan is!" exclaimed Jack. All I gotta do is punch you through five more ceilings, and we'll be on the seventh floor!"
Clearly that hadn't been what the narrator was thinking at all. He held out a Poké Ball through the gap, and called "Croagunk, return!" Meanwhile, Jack jumped up, grabbed onto the ceiling, and hoisted himself up onto the second floor. He then made a fist and started towards the narrator.
"Now really, sir," began the narrator, backing up slowly. "Can't we discuss this rationally?"
Jack shook his head.
"I didn't think so."
At that point, the narrator began running down the hallway at full speed, with Jack hot on his heels. Croagunk then burst free of its Poké Ball and joined in the chase. The narrator hadn't complemented himself again; Croagunk only did so for lack of anything better to do.
Down the hallway they ran. In the distance, the narrator saw a dark red speck. He frowned, wondering what it was. About two seconds later, it became apparant that the red speck was in fact a brick wall, and it was blocking the entire hallway. The narrator tried to stop running, but he had already built up too much momentum. The brick wall was now roughly two or three inches away....!
---------------------
And end chapter 7!
*The narrator's Chatot narrates temporarily.
*It is revealed that Jack can't be polite without passing out.
*It is revealed that Jack can't be polite without passing out.
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SerenadeSP
My Loyal Feraligatr
Don't worry about it. I found it as soon as you posted anyway so it didn't matter.
Priceless
Oh god, another conceited narrator XD
XD love it when you do this.
I'm repeating myself a lot but I love this story.
Wow, I knew Jack was a jerk but I wasn't expecting this O-o
But I did expect Jack to punch the narrator out at some point, but I didn't expect him to wait so long.
Sounds like a good plan to me.
Priceless
Oh god, another conceited narrator XD
XD love it when you do this.
I'm repeating myself a lot but I love this story.
Wow, I knew Jack was a jerk but I wasn't expecting this O-o
But I did expect Jack to punch the narrator out at some point, but I didn't expect him to wait so long.
Sounds like a good plan to me.
mattman324
aka Shiny_Feraligatr
That plan is a genius plan. I daresay the narrarator (Who is not sexy in any way) finally thought of a good plan that doesn't involve "use plot device".