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The Beta House: Redux

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Well-Known Member
Story title: Chains of destiny Armageddon
Fandom (preferably pokémon): Pokemon
Plot summary: Story about a group of teen's, who, despite their own wishes, are forced into helping save the world from being destroyed, with a group of unlikely allies.
Genre: Adventure
Rating: Pg-13
Mentor needed: Comprehensive mentor
Prior writing experience: Little, I can write, but I'm new to stories
Preferred mentor (optional):
Writing sample (optional, but expected):
Beginning of chapter one

Reid smiled to himself slightly, a smirk if you would, which soon transformed into a grin as he sighed happily. "Finally! Took it long enough." The computer chirped at him, letting him know it was finally done with whatever it might be working on. His fingers flew across the keys, before stopping and grabbing the printout he just made.

Finally, their weeks of hard work had paid off and he went out to the window, reminiscing on how he had gotten to this point right here right now, after finishing such long task. He was proud of his work, but it was kind of interesting to reflect on.

It had been a year since he moved here, arriving at this small, backwater town, in the region of Tuvalen. It hadn't even been on the map back then. The only reason anyone knew about it was that someone had recently discovered gold there, and the mining company had come to prospect the nearby mountains. They only brought in a few families at first, since they didn't want to do a full operation until they knew the mountains held enough gold to make it worthwhile.

They soon discovered that it was in fact rich, and more came, though most stayed in a few large cabins near the mountain. Now none of this would have mattered to Reid, save that if you were going to mine, you needed large amounts of electricity, and the town wasn't made to provide it. So, his family and his best friend’s family all moved there to supervise the work. So they had relocated from happening Aquamarine City and into this backwater dump.

Now when the work was done, instead of moving back, his parents decided that this was a better place to raise him for a while: it had a more positive atmosphere. Meaning he had no friends – save his best one – who had moved with him to this town. But this was soon left by the wayside when they began exploring together.
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Beginning Trainer
Story title: The Crystal Tales
Fandom (preferably pokémon): Pokemon
Plot summary: Set in a slight mix of the manga and game-verse of the 2nd Generation, Team Rocket is making a come back, but they didn't count on a set of new trainers with a lot of potential screwing up their plans. Also towards the end there will be an anime-type Pokemon League.
Genre: OT/Journey Fic
Rating: PG-13
Mentor needed: Comprehensive
Prior writing experience: I've tried writing a couple of stories in the past, and have completed one of them but it was only a few chapters long and didn't have very good description.
Writing sample (optional, but expected):

First two paragraph's of Chapter One:

The bright sun rose over the lake of New Bark Town and shone down on the small town, giving it a quaint sort of look. The forests that surrounded the peaceful town of new beginnings were drenched from the storm that had passed over the surrounding area from Violet City the night before. Still the luscious green, tree filled area awoke with the usual sound of it’s native, purple rat-like and round chocolate colored raccoon-like Pokemon Rattata and Sentret.

The clear blue lake on the opposite border of town’s Pokemon began to become active as well. Sounds of the red scaled fish-like Pokemon known as Magikarp jumping out of the water were heard; these sounds were the wake up call for the town of Professor Elm. Off on the edge of town near the lake sat a normal looking two-story house. It was painted a generic white color and guarded by a wide and equally generic white picket fence. A soft snoring was emitted from the top right window of the house, and soon a contrasting loud yawn followed.

The young boy who made these sounds soon rose from his red blanket and white sheet covered bed. He scratched his short, dark raven black hair as he made his way to the bathroom to change out of his blue boxers. His sight was temporarily taken away as he flicked on the light switch to reveal the yellow walls of his restroom. He then opened his golden brown eyes after they got adjusted to the light of day again. The black haired youth slid on a plain black t-shirt and a pair of long yellow cargo shorts. He combed his dark black hair and then turned off the light in his bathroom afterwards and went downstairs.

As he walked down the now creaky wooden stairs to the main living area of his house his mom was able to hear the brown eyed boy from the kitchen from the loud sounds emitted from the stairs every time he took a step. “Oh there you are Jimmy.” The long dark black haired woman stated as if she was expecting her son earlier. Her hair was tied back in a short pony tail and though Jimmy had her hair color her eyes were a dark sea of green like the nearby forest. “It’s been nearly a week since the last Silver Conference ended and you and Marina are thirteen so you know what that means.” She reminded him, trying to sound upbeat about what she was foreshadowing even though it really made her depressed.
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E/GL obsessed
greywolf123: Okay, you're on the list. Good luck!

dash142: Done and done. Although, technically samples should be four decent-sized paragraphs long, so if you manage to edit it, great; if not then that's fine. Have fun~

Saffire Persian

Now you see me...
Now that I don't have work anymore, I suppose I can be more active again.

Category: Comprehensive
Genre specialty (if any): I like just about everything... so, not really.
Method of contact: PM - I would prefer to be PMed if a writer wants me to beta their story, as I may not be scouring the list for someone to pick up. So I'd probably just beta read by request. That all right?
Proofreader (yes/no): Yes
Writing Samples: See signature.


Well-Known Member
I just wanted to say I found a beta, and that member isn't on the list, but that is okay! Right?


Well-Known Member
Can you add me on the list? Just look at mys stuff from my first post here. Sadly, my other beta was too busy. I just a need a beta who fits the criteria from my first post and won't bail on me like my previous betas.


Story title: Pokemon Master Quest(Kanto)
**Advanced Evolution**
Fandom: Pokemon

Plot summary: Seth is a boy that is just starting his journey. His mother takes care for him since his father the scientist went missing after an explosion in the lab during an mysterious experiment.
Seth didn't knew that his father was working for Team Rocket, and that he disappeared during the creation of Mewtwo. After Giovanni's death, Silver, his only son takes his place a becomes a leader of Team Rocket. He wants revenge, because he thinks Mewtwo killed his father.

Genre: Journey/Adventrue

Mentor needed: Desperate. Somebody to check for grammer and descriptions before I post.
Prior writing experience: Not so much.

Writing sample (optional, but expected): Here is my prologue:
Mew, a very unique Pokemon who was created by God Pokemon – ???.
It has been called - The Protector, because he protected many people and Pokemon. Mew was created to stop the war between Pokemon and humans, which was caused by Imperial King. Imperial King was using powers of many Pokemon and treated them as slaves to conquer the world. He thought everything is great, until Mew appeared. With his powerful ability of transformation and learning every attack, Mew stopped Imperial King and returned peace to world. Since then Mew remained on the Earth helping people and Pokemon on his quest to stop the evil that lurks in shadows.

1000 years later..............
The war finished long, long ago. Now, people and Pokemon live together in peace as friends and family. They bond together by battling against their opponents. But there are still people who abuse Pokemon and use them in evil cause. People, like Team Rocket.
Team Rocket, an evil organization that was formed by Celina, an women whose long ancestor is Imperial King. She heard for the legend of Mew and his powers. She was so astonished that she decided to create an improved clone, a Pokemon with improved psychical powers and strength. After long hunt for Mew she got one of his eyelashes so she commissioned team of scientist to create an improved clone.
Celina died soon, and her son Giovanni became a new leader of Team Rocket.
Giovanni decided to continue with the project, that his mother started.
During the process of creating a clone something went wrong, during the explosion that happened. The clone disappeared as one of their scientist.
Giovanni continued to hunt Mewtwo, until he mysteriously died.
Many people believe that Mewtwo killed him, including his son Silver.
Silver wanted revenge so he decided to lead Team Rocket. His new goal is to first capture Mew, and then Mewtwo to create one ultimate Pokemon.
I might as well try...

Story title: Through the Eyes of Time

Fandom: Pokemon

Plot summary: Dialga, Lord of Time, regards humans as parasites of the world. His negetive feelings only grow when a man-made device robs him most of his powers. With the not-so-wanted aid of a human companion, Dialga seeks for a way to regain his true self and to return home, but will humans get in his way again?

Genre: Action/Adventure

Rating: PG-13 for abuse, violence, and language.

Mentor needed: A comprehensive mentor

Prior writing experience: I've been writing for my own entertainment for over 3 years now, but I've never completed my stories due to lack of motivation...

Writing sample (optional, but expected): Here is a part of the fic that I listed above:

The dark metallic sky of my new home swirled around above our heads. Only my brother and I lived in this Outer Dimension. We had once fought over this very area, but that started a chain of events that we failed to see. A town was almost destroyed, my other brother nearly killed me out of anger, and the last confrontation of all three of us nearly destroyed the human world. We would have if Master Arceus (and a group of humans and their pokemon) hadn’t intervened. As punishment for our pettiness and foolishness, Giratina was sentenced to ‘home arrest’ in the Torn World. Palkia and I got the worst sentence: spending all of eternity together in the very dimension we fought over.

The dragon was floating a few yards away from me. Out of the three of us, he was probably the most handsome… or girly. Palkia’s body was a light shade of pink, with various magenta lines and grey segments covering his body. On his back were two huge fin-like appendances, and on each of his round shoulders were two glistening pearl orbs. They were his pride and joy, like the glittering diamond-shaped gem on the crest mounted on my body.

I flew over to him cautiously. Even though we have to live together doesn’t mean we had to like it. Palkia always showed his disgust for our predicament blatantly, while I tried to approach it on a mature level...
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The RPG Godfather
Story title: Pokemon Heroes: Heroes of the Future
Fandom (preferably pokémon): Pokémon and Heroes
Plot summary:
Humans have been living with Pokemon for well over one thousand years now and as you would expect like all species we inherit some of the others aspects. Four legged Pokemon walking on two legs, non psychic Pokemon talking with humans and on the Human side of things, humans who can understand Poke speech and humans who live like Pokemon.

Infact we include each other in everyday life we treat each other as eaquls, we work together and we even battle each other but there is one question that plagues scientists minds and that question, Could a Human ever use Pokemon attacks.

Extract from Dr C.Foster's Diary.

It had been a normal day at the hospital, babies were born paitents where saved and Pokemon were healed and no one had died. At around 10:30 I started packing up to go home talking to the nurses. I even told one that today had been a miracle and nothing could go wrong, if only I knew how wrong I was. Suddenly a woman ran in with her husband they said that she was going into premature labor, I got her into a chair and off she went.

About 15 minutes later about 20 men dressed in pure black uniforms came in shouting and Waving Swords. They said they wanted all Pregnant women and all unevolved Pokemon.

I and the security guards started fighting them off I was using my trusty Aipom and foot and half sword. we thought together never killing only wounding, Aipom was always by my side and then I saw it use Double hit and I new it was close to evolving

At 10:52 Aipom evolved and with that we where able defeat these criminals but also at 10:52 the woman who went into Premature birth gave birth to a boy by the name of Reteka he was born with a strange birth mark on his head but apart from that he appeared to be a normal baby but I was wrong and if I had off known what I knew back then, then his parents would still be alive.


This boy was born at they exact time a Pokemon evolved there have been only 17other known occurrences of this and these people all have Powers of a different type of attack one has fire another has grass. These attacks are pre-determined by what type the Pokemon who evolved at the time of their birth was meaning this Boy can use normal attack which make him one of the most special because he can Mimic others ability's but the boy knows nothing of his power all he knows is that all the people have who have ever cared for him have been killed.
Now off the subject of the boy it is said that these ability's run through blood so if someone was to get a blood sample of some one who had a power they could replicate this into other human vessels, there are people out there trying to do this they go by the name of Dark Twilight, they where created when Teams Rocket and Galactic merged and started researching into Human and Pokemon similarities about five months down the line Giovanni died in a bizarre incident and Cyrus disappeared so Mars,Saturn and Jupiter took control but it then became clear that they and the two commanders had been taking orders from a third person.

Now I must finish writing this as it is time to leave before Team Dark Twilight get here I will entrust this to the lake with hopes that it will reach safe hands

Professor Evergreen
Genre: Action, maybe a little bit of Adventure
Rating: PG-13
Mentor needed: Comprehensive please
Prior writing experience: I did start writing an adventure fic but I closed it and stopped to work on my writing with RPG's I posted it and a comment made me realise I really haven't change overly much.
Writing sample (optional, but expected):As Fang tore through the deserted open country side, most of the tree’s and people, were mere blurs; Fang understood the need for haste, his paws left small prints in the ground thanks to the velocity of his pace, Reteka’s shoulder length hair whipping around his neck again, his Topaz eye’s were watery and his face was red from the cold, turning his head only resulted in a feeling of nausea, a look behind him revealed nothing, nothing seemed to be moving, no sound except for the wind rushing at his face, it was silent and so unnerving, Reteka settled himself down a little more and thought back to when he and Fang had first met.


Story title: Legacy of the Dawn

Fandom: Pokemon crossover with several other series. Main characters are Misty and Ash

Summary: Ash and Misty each take their own adventures through the realms of the universe.

Genre: adventure/fantasy

Rating: PG-13-R for language, violence, and occasional fanservice.

Mentor needed: A person who is willing to hear me out and help me. a comprehensive mentor

Prior writing experience: I have been working on crossovers for years, though writing them out has been a problem for me. I also have wrote or co wrote several human x pokemon oneshots. http://www.fanfiction.net/u/1027610/johnnyd2

Method of contact: AIM NEWSGUY1988 windows live johnnyd21988@live.com deviantart note. Johnnyd2.deviantart.com my PM box on serebii is bursting too the seems, so i would prefer an alternate way

more info here http://johnnyd2.deviantart.com/journal/23765316/

sorry if anythings wrong, this is my first time posting in this thread XD. i think XP.
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Watch Glass
Story title: Striking Out
Fandom (preferably pokémon): Pokemon
Plot summary: A put-upon trainer who's been shackled to a small group since near the beginning of his journey, has, after much aggravation and delaying, collected 8 badges and is now training for the league which starts in a month. However, his 'team-mates' do something that finally pushes him over the edge and he 'quits' the group, going out to train on his own. Follows his preparations for the league and the epic confrontation between him and his old allies. There may even be a pokemon battle involved.
Genre: Adventure with possibly a bit of comedy (though I'm not sure, since I don't do funny very well)
Rating: PG-13
Mentor needed: Anything but grammatical; I do need one (I use brackets and semi-colons way too much :p) but improving my grammar isn't what I want to do at the moment. I'd prefer to get my other stuff fixed up first.
Prior writing experience: Not much, though I reckon I'm not that bad.
Preferred mentor (optional): Dunno; new on the forum
Writing sample (optional, but expected): First bit of the story (not sure if I'll include it; I might start a bit later). Not going to try and circumvent the profanity filter (putting in the first letter of each word).

Max pinched the bridge of his nose, as the start of an argument signified the awakening of his fellow travellers. Judging from its volume and the lack of stimulus provided to them, it’d probably be about breakfast or possibly, if he was lucky, about whose errant elbow had poked another’s face during the nig-
“We only have one bloody piece left, princess.”
“I don’t care, I’ll have it. It’s called a rasher anyway.”
“Does it matter what it’s called? And what do expect the rest of us to eat?”
Obviously, it's Pam and Josh’s turn to carry the idiot ball.
“Go eat cereal or something”
“Can’t you think about someone else for a moment? I might want the piece of bacon.”
“I told you, it’s a rasher.”
“And I don’t care.”
And as inevitably as the tides, one of them will spite the other, who’ll take an eye for an eye, a vicious cycle will begin and nobody will get breakfast.
“Oh. Ooops.”
“You did that on purpose, you b******.”
“Oh, it seems like the last piece of bacon just dropped on the ground, I guess you’ll have to eat something else.”
“You. YOU... Oh darn, I guess I’ll have to have eggs. Oh no, I accidently dropped all but two of them. I guess I’ll just have to have both.”
He’d already had breakfast about half an hour ago, but empty stomachs meant another reason to go to town. And another reason to glare coldly at each other. There was a mighty crash, as Josh tackled the girl, attempting to snatch the remaining two eggs away from her. Egg on someone’s face probably.
“What the f*** are you doing?”
Max shook his head disapprovingly. Obviously, the third member (fourth if you were looking at it chronologically) had just exited the tent to find the other two in a compromising position. It’d been funny the first time. Now it was just getting stupid. It’d be nice if the others realized they were repeating the same scene once a week with the actors swapped around. Then maybe they could stop being complete idiots. Hopefully, he was too far away to get dra-
He sighed. The day was looking so nice at sunrise. There had been a chilly wind blowing, enough to keep him awake whilst he trained his poke-
Once again, Max pinched the bridge of his nose.


can't touch this...
applying someone who can BETA READ my fanfic

Story title: SSBB a clash from another demension

Fandom: pretty much almost everything from pokemon to fighting with other characters

rating: UNKNOWN

Mentor i need: someone who can help rate my fanfic and my Grammer is terrible and needs to be fixed! and hope that he or she would become a big help!

storyline: After the Brawlers defeat tabuu they continue on there ways fighting eachother and doing what they do best but in the demension of Sony Tabuu's older sister Debuu plans to take revenge on the brawlers As the two worlds being attacked will the sony fighters and the SSB brawlers be abe to take on this new evil force?

has a lot of shocks, twists and possibly characters you don't even know!

Reward for helping me throughout the novel: if you have a pokemon game u will earn a shiny Dratini and Murkrow ur name will also be mentioned in the story

message me right away if interested
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E/GL obsessed
Yes, I know this is massively over-due. Yes, I am sorry. Life. Blargh.

On a happier note, my brother is now married. ^^

Saffire Persian: Accepted! Under other circumstances I'd say beta-reading by request is fine, and in the future it could be, but we have a lot of people awaiting a mentor who probably waiting for a PM themselves and aren't checking back. I'll list you as preferring to beta by request, but in the meantime, it would be great if you could take a look at the list as it stands now to see if you can't pick up anyone who's already waiting.

Otherwise, welcome. ^^

niedude: Thanks for the heads up; removed from list, and good luck in future writing.

Torpoleon: No sweat, you never left it. ;)

ben_pokemon: Since you said 'description' I'm assuming a language mentor, yes? Done~

Sapphire Phoenix: Done and done. Rather like your fic title, by the way. ;)

Stabberz: Listed. Good luck with your story~

johnnyd2: Heh, took me a day to realise you'd edited your post. Thanks for doing so, and added to the list.

Flintlock: (unique username--nice!) I've added you as needing a comprehensive mentor, since you seemed to want improvement over a pretty broad spectrum, grammar notwithstanding; you'll be able to negotiate with your mentor what you'd like to focus on, though, so it seemed the best course. Hope that's okay, and good luck!

GamerGod351: Mkay, added to the list, although a sample of your work-in-progress would be nice (at least four decent-sized paragraphs), so if you could edit that into your post sometime that would great. Thanks~


Well-Known Member
Story title: Universe 13
Fandom (preferably pokémon): And it is Pokemon
Plot summary: My fanfic is about four planets that had to be split into seperate universes long ago. Pokemon are on one, Pokemon and People in another, just People on Earth, and a mix of People and Pokemon in the last universe. A long trail of many stories, I'm focusing on the human, Moriko, and how she connects the four universes. (for now...)
Genre: Sci-Fi (?)
Rating: About PG-13. Absolutely no swears/sex, but mild violence, not just between Pokemon.
Mentor needed: Plot/Language mentor (or general)
Prior writing experience: I've been in English for all my school career (first grade to freshman) and have had to write many essays. Narrative, expository, persuasive; I've done them all. This is my first out of class writing experience. (major writing experience)


Well-Known Member
Could you perhaps take me off the list? I have chosen to discontinue that fic and will be contacting my beta soon.
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