The Legends of Sonar

[Jillian14]

~The Legends Of Sonar~
Part 1: The Moon By Night
Prologue​

Sonar; some people call it the forgotten land. Others call it another world. But Sonar is much, much more. Sonar is indeed another world. A world in need of some serious help. Home to humans, Pokemon, and even some mystical creatures call this world home. But along with all of its legends of light there are there dark and evil pasts…



Demons; the most feared of all creatures also make there home here. They and hold the power of Dark Control. A power that can take control of any other creature making them evil. The people, Pokemon, and good creatures of Sonar wait for the day when all evil from the Demons will vanish. But they are not the only feared ones…


Alpha X; the only known group of humans that are known to attack the good. They were said to have been heroes when they stopped the Demons’ latest war on Sonar when they were only taking over and continuing what the Demons have started. Now there is double the evil in Sonar.



But with its evil there is even its savior (s). Enter Sola Omega, a young teenage girl who was kidnapped by Alpha X and forced to wear a bracelet. The bracelet holds ultimate power but it is also a curse. Young Sola is cursed to become a powerless mystical creature every night. The Winged Cat; Sola’s host by night is a powerless creature with only the power of flight. If she ever hoped to defeat the Demons and Alpha X she was going to need help…and help is what she is soon going to get…



Three Pokemon Coordinators from the real Pokemon world are said to be the only ones besides Sola that are destined to save the world. But only if they can get alone. Enter May, Drew, and Harley. Rivals, but can they be friends when this is all over…



There are many legends. If the world of Solar is destined to be saved…then they all…most be…discovered…

~To Be Continued ~​

 

[CHeSHiRe-CaT]

Well, it is a bit short for a prologue, but heh, that's what we're here for ^^;

They and hold the power of Dark Control.

Wanted to point this out; it seems like you didn't realize you were typing a...er..non-making-sense sentence XD

Alpha X; the only known group of humans that are known to attack the good.

This, technically, is not a sentence. It's just stating a subject :S

Your writing is better than the majority of new writers' talent, but you've still a lot to improve on. For example, your Prologue just seems to me like a preview of sorts, for you don't describe the appearance/feel/texture of anything, but just lay out the plot at hand. Now, let me give you some valuable advice you may need before you write another chapter, or part to your fic:

1. Please read Advice for Aspiring Authors if you haven't already, which has a great deal of information about how to become a better writer, certain aspects your fic should include, what not to do, and other sorts of helpful data. Be sure to read the Rules as well, because they play into writing a fic as well.

2. This isn't necessarily required, but you should read a chapter or two of someone else's work on the forums that has the quality of a strong writer. In my opinion, the best fiction to read a chapter or two of would be The Quest for the Legends by Dragonfree, which is a classic and legendary story here in the Fan Fiction forum. The author, Dragonfree, is fantastic when it comes to detail, description, characterization, setting, and plot (which are excellent traits to have in a fic).

If you have any questions, please feel free to PM me, or others like LadyMyuu, who would like to help you in writing a better fic. We see you're not fully developed yet, and we just want to help you. You can take our advice, or you can leave it at that. Have a nice day ^_^