The Official Advice Thread

[Zazie]

I have kind of an unusual advice request:

So my birthday is coming up, and I am thinking of an alternative to a traditional birthday party. I am seeking advice on whether my idea is a good one or a bad one, and if it needs some tweaking.

I am thinking about setting aside some time during pre-weekend* (thrusday night-friday) for getting together with friends. I am going to send out info to everyone I know on facebook** about it to see if I can meet up to do something for my birthday and to feel free to invite anyone else along. It's more of a sort of notification for one or more small social events rather than a traditional party.

As for why I am doing this instead of a party: I live too far to host a party and a decent of the people I hang out with don't get along. I am also terrible at organizaing things. I am figuring if I make it more of a "who wants to hang with me on my birthday" type of thing, stuff might be likely to fall into place a little easier and I can spend time with people without having to deal with logistics. Considering the last enjoyable birthday ended up being really really spontaneous day, I am thinking it would be more fun tha way too.

So do I have a good plan here, or am I trying to capture lightning in a bottle? Anything I should do to avoid failure or disaster?

*A lot of people I know are college students or recent grads thursday friday is kind of party night
**Due creating a new profile that's 20 people, so it's not a lot of people.

 

[Jb]

I do know a lot of people on FB ignore those party requests since they get them so often. I'd contact them personally or send a notification to them personally.

 

[Zazie]

Trying to contact people with other methods hasn't really worked all that well in the past, it usually ends up being a 50/50 chance of getting response. Unless it's in person, which is hard to do in a weeks notice with distance and scheduling.

I can try the direct contect with a few people, but it's a bit too difficult to do it with every person who I would potentially want to notify.

 

[Plus side down side]

I have kind of an unusual advice request:

So my birthday is coming up, and I am thinking of an alternative to a traditional birthday party. I am seeking advice on whether my idea is a good one or a bad one, and if it needs some tweaking.

I am thinking about setting aside some time during pre-weekend* (thrusday night-friday) for getting together with friends. I am going to send out info to everyone I know on facebook** about it to see if I can meet up to do something for my birthday and to feel free to invite anyone else along. It's more of a sort of notification for one or more small social events rather than a traditional party.

As for why I am doing this instead of a party: I live too far to host a party and a decent of the people I hang out with don't get along. I am also terrible at organizaing things. I am figuring if I make it more of a "who wants to hang with me on my birthday" type of thing, stuff might be likely to fall into place a little easier and I can spend time with people without having to deal with logistics. Considering the last enjoyable birthday ended up being really really spontaneous day, I am thinking it would be more fun tha way too.

So do I have a good plan here, or am I trying to capture lightning in a bottle? Anything I should do to avoid failure or disaster?

*A lot of people I know are college students or recent grads thursday friday is kind of party night
**Due creating a new profile that's 20 people, so it's not a lot of people.

I've done this for multiple get togethers, and I've got to say that it tends to work really well. Since not everybody answers them, it actually prevents it from being a huge thing, and usually the people you are close to are the ones that show up, wheras acquaintences don't tend to.

However, my advice is that you aren't really going to know how many people are really going to show up, so you kind of have to be prepared for a big gap in numbers.

 

[Terry. T.]

It's nearly 5am where I am and I'm definitely not sleeping today. However tonight I want to know if there's any ways I can force myself to sleep as such?

 

[NimhShambler]

I'm at a bit of an impasse. I just began my fourth year of college. I am an English major, but I am not sure if I want to do this any more. I have to read so many things that I hate and it is really starting to wear on me. Buck up, how bad could it be? you say. Try reading 200-300 pages of things you don't want to read to begin with, then writing a five-page report about what every little detail means. It's driving me bonkers!

So, what should I do, stick it out (I also have to go to graduate school for four more years after this to become an English professor) or try to find something else?


@Terry T: House work. So much house work. I've been doing a lot of cleaning and furniture moving as of late, and it has wore me out. I suggest that.


EDIT:
I forgot to say this, but I'm technically an Interdisciplinary Major (though I'm doing the work of an English major--my uni doesn't offer an English major, as weird as that is). I've darted around from biology, psychology, chemistry, history, and English during my time, I've just set my focus on English.

 

[Zazie]

I'm at a bit of an impasse. I just began my fourth year of college. I am an English major, but I am not sure if I want to do this any more. I have to read so many things that I hate and it is really starting to wear on me. Buck up, how bad could it be? you say. Try reading 200-300 pages of things you don't want to read to begin with, then writing a five-page report about what every little detail means. It's driving me bonkers!

So, what should I do, stick it out (I also have to go to graduate school for four more years after this to become an English professor) or try to find something else?

There is also the option of sticking it out an undergrad and get a grad degree in something else. It's not ideal, since you still have to take english now and your grad degree might take a bit more time and money than continuing, but it could be an option worth considering.

Of course it depends on whether you are interested in english at all, or are set on getting a post-graduate degree.

If you have a minor, perhaps you could also switch it with your major if you find that you enjoy it more. If you're already a good ways to a different degree you won't take a huge hit in time and money.

 

[Plus side down side]

It's nearly 5am where I am and I'm definitely not sleeping today. However tonight I want to know if there's any ways I can force myself to sleep as such?

Try doing push ups and sit ups. Sometimes physical activity can make a really big difference in your sleep cycle.

 

[GhostAnime]

I'm at a bit of an impasse. I just began my fourth year of college. I am an English major, but I am not sure if I want to do this any more. I have to read so many things that I hate and it is really starting to wear on me. Buck up, how bad could it be? you say. Try reading 200-300 pages of things you don't want to read to begin with, then writing a five-page report about what every little detail means. It's driving me bonkers!

So, what should I do, stick it out (I also have to go to graduate school for four more years after this to become an English professor) or try to find something else?


@Terry T: House work. So much house work. I've been doing a lot of cleaning and furniture moving as of late, and it has wore me out. I suggest that.


EDIT:
I forgot to say this, but I'm technically an Interdisciplinary Major (though I'm doing the work of an English major--my uni doesn't offer an English major, as weird as that is). I've darted around from biology, psychology, chemistry, history, and English during my time, I've just set my focus on English.

If this is your fourth year, you probably should just go ahead and finish even if you don't truly desire it. The amount of money and time you've used thus far to get here... do you really want to use it all over again on something else? If you do have something else in mind, what exactly is it? Is it something you're 100% sure you wouldn't change your mind again 3 years down the road?

If this was your first and second year, I'd be singing a different tune, but I've somewhat stumbled in this situation myself. Most people will tell you to just finish the degree, and dive into whatever you're truly interested in via graduate school. Just be sure you know what it is. It's okay to have your Bachelor's in whatever isn't truly your "core". It's still something valuable to you.

You can pretty much go to graduate school for almost anything, and the prerequisite is most likely something you'd already have (if not, it'd only be a couple of classes you probably already taken). So, yeah, just finish out this last year and don't waste as many years as you truly need to. You may be able to get out of graduate school before you attempt an entirely different bachelor's anyway.

But first and foremost, just see your counselor about this. See what they say.

 

[Prelude]

****ing switch, redoing 3 years of your life is nothing compared to living in misery and regret

 

[JD]

I plan to run for Homecoming Court my senior year does anyone have any experiences or advice for that?

 

[Plus side down side]

I plan to run for Homecoming Court my senior year does anyone have any experiences or advice for that?

It depends on your school atmosphere, I suppose. But how most of the people got on homecoming court at my high school was to get good grades, and be very involved at school. This means participating in your school's activities, and make yourself known. It's also good if you do things like help decorate the floats and do the various skits and games that the student council puts on. Just putting yourself out there can go a long way.

 

[JD]

It depends on your school atmosphere, I suppose. But how most of the people got on homecoming court at my high school was to get good grades, and be very involved at school. This means participating in your school's activities, and make yourself known. It's also good if you do things like help decorate the floats and do the various skits and games that the student council puts on. Just putting yourself out there can go a long way.

Yeah that's what I have heard about homecoming. My grades are decent and I'm nice to basically everyone even if someone is rude to me I try to treat them with respect the only after school activity I do is track and field in the spring but I guess it's worth a shot trying.

 

[Plus side down side]

Yeah that's what I have heard about homecoming. My grades are decent and I'm nice to basically everyone even if someone is rude to me I try to treat them with respect the only after school activity I do is track and field in the spring but I guess it's worth a shot trying.

Well being nice is definitely a good start. All you have to do is be confident, and be involved and you will probably be nominated.

 

[JD]

Well being nice is definitely a good start. All you have to do is be confident, and be involved and you will probably be nominated.

Thanks I'm definitely going to give it a try

 

[Archstaraptor]

Help.

So I recently got my GCSE exam results back,and realised how sub-par they were with everyone else's.
Fortunately,my results for the subjects I'm continuing next year were pretty good-my Maths being a strong A* as well as my French and Science A grades.

Despite this,I still feel depressed,as I feel I've let myself down in other subjects-I need to be much more focused this year.

Is there anybody out there who has taken A-levels (or a national pre-uni equivalent)and can give me some advice based on their experience studying them?

 

[Dragon trainer]

So I recently got my GCSE exam results back,and realised how sub-par they were with everyone else's.
Fortunately,my results for the subjects I'm continuing next year were pretty good-my Maths being a strong A* as well as my French and Science A grades.

Despite this,I still feel depressed,as I feel I've let myself down in other subjects-I need to be much more focused this year.

Is there anybody out there who has taken A-levels (or a national pre-uni equivalent)and can give me some advice based on their experience studying them?

Hi I took a national pre-uni equivalent and got into uni and only got 5 Cs at GCSE at 16 which didnt include English or Maths, eventually got 7 at 19. I wasnt given support for my own disabilities which I should have been. Please dont feel depressed an A* in Maths is brilliant as is As in French and Science. Don't give up on your own subjects. Can I ask what are taking and at which stage (GCSE/A'level or eqiv)

In my studying I found using a student diary to help me write down everything, I also used a wipeable calender (large one) on my wall where I could see it day and night and then plan out over that academic year, this is a brilliant way to see over the year on a large scale. On a personal note, why do you think this about your grades? I ask because comparing yourself to everyone else is not going to be helpful or useful in any way. The only thing you can do is do the work and work hard and be happy of the grades. What is your plan to do? Do a further studies/work/NVQ in a particular area? Try and focus on the positives of your outcome.

One other way is to go to your teachers and ask them what you need to cover and where you went wrong in exams. It could be exams are not brilliant way for you to recall and collet evidence in a written form, its the same for me, I struggle on essays in exams. I would also go over the spec from excel or exam boards and look over what needs to be covered and go over exam papers.

Also look at your revising method, some people need to see/do and others abosrb from a text book. I myself, am the former and need to watch videos/look at practical based work. When revising I look at colours/space and learn the forumulas/methods done and have to find other ways such as repeatly writing everything down, multipletimes (I mean 20 + times for every exam and each different topic).

That is my academic advise (from a pre uni/uni/hoping to be a post grad again student).

But on a personal note, PLEASE NEVER compare yourself to your friends, this way will only depress you further, and it wont happen, everyone is different and different things work for everyone. Congratulate yourself with your grades and do some fun things with your friends and enjoy the summer before you go back, go camping with them, try a new sports just dont surround yourself with the need to just get grades, I did and it just didnt work out early for me at 16-18 it took me a bit longer to do it but it was so much better because I worked harder and didnt take it for granteed.

If you want to go to uni as well then do related to your course and do something such as volunteering as well. *Hugs*

 

[Dragon trainer]

As I cant edit my post (silly laptop) if you feel the need for further help then please PM me in confidence. @Archstaraptor

 

[Zenotwapal]

Well today I started college. I had a decent day at best but I am feeling very dejected and lonely. It was onset by the events of yesterday.

I have posted about this particular female before. I've been involved with a girl for about 8 months or so now. I've dated her before and for the past 3 months we've been in this limbo between friends and dating. We were taking a break but we agreed not to see other people until we were ready.
Time past and I eventually expressed my feelings to see her again and she said until she was ready. So I kinda put my yearning for her presence to the side awaiting a time she'd want to see me again.
And I waited, and waited.
Well a few weeks ago she told me she was going to see a guy friend of hers that just "recently had a break up, now he's feeling depressed, so I'm going to be his shoulder to cry on". Already this was fishy to me but I stupidly trusted her, only come to find out that yesterday she spend the entire day with him.
Apparently she is harboring feelings for this guy. She told me that she "loves me but he makes me smile". She sugar coated this **** all day when we discussed it. Basically I don't make her happy anymore. I don't cut the mustard.

Honestly I would have taken this much differently if she just told me she was going to see someone else. But she blatantly lied to me and decided she would wait until now to tell me.
I feel like trash. Unwanted. Lonely. I poured my heart out for her and my feelings get trashed for another guy so quickly. My heart is broken. And I feel stupid for going on this 3 month ride for this result. I feel like a total idiot.

How the hell do I pick myself up? What did I do wrong here? What went wrong here exactly? I'm a wreck right now. My self esteem is at a new low. I haven't felt this bad in a long time. I just need some sort of advice, anything. I need help.

 

[KibaLG8]

Hello everyone. It's been ages since I've been on here. I began working in this warehouse where I have left a good impression, saving up money for a new car finally & I have been very vocal at work lately, where as I usually would just be very quiet for the most part when I first started there like 3 months ago. I have met alot of people there & I have now been meeting girls alot more lately, which was an improvement since the time I was here.

I experienced something I usually never do when talking to girl, when the girl comes to contact with me when I am talking to her at work. I barely began talking to her today because I was moved to her area for the day(no work on my area), I showed her a paper, asking a question as she was explaining it to me, she had her finger pointing on the paper but her other fingers were on my hand holding the paper & just kept it there until she finished explaining, I didn't move my hand though. She also tends to have her chest bump into my hand, a couple of times. She usually laughs at whatever I do. There's more but this should be enough to ask....

Is this a good indication that she is interested?