• Hi all. We have had reports of member's signatures being edited to include malicious content. You can rest assured this wasn't done by staff and we can find no indication that the forums themselves have been compromised.

    However, remember to keep your passwords secure. If you use similar logins on multiple sites, people and even bots may be able to access your account.

    We always recommend using unique passwords and enable two-factor authentication if possible. Make sure you are secure.
  • Be sure to join the discussion on our discord at: Discord.gg/serebii
  • If you're still waiting for the e-mail, be sure to check your junk/spam e-mail folders

The Official Advice Thread

Pokémon Trainer Xande

Yu-Gi-Oh Duelist
How do you talk with your crush without feeling like an idiot?

Well, usually I wouldn't answer it because I feel n00bish about this kind of thing, but I fell really good after what happened today to me (I will talk about it after I end this). Well, the point is: Look like she is what you told her she is. If she is your crush and you said she was your best friend, treat her as your best friend. Try to don't get nervous, and if you feel kinda nervous, try to relax, even if you need to stop the conversation for a while or talk about random things in life. Again, don't try to push yourself towards the limits. If she doesn't know you've got a crush on her, be as secretive as you can, as this can help to get closer to her.

Now, what we all wanted (or not) , my advice-asking time:

I've been friends with a girl for about to 3 weeks. We are nice friends, and I've got a crush on her (she is the new crush I told about in my last post in this thread). I'm not 100% sure if she wants to go forward, but I think it would be right for me to trying to know. Today, we had lunch together, and after walking all over a mall in my city with her and a friend of her, we were alone in the front of her house. I tried to kiss her, but I'm a bit taller than her, so I "missed the target" and it ended up like a normal kiss on the cheek (yes, pretty bad "aim"). She didn't seem to notice what I tried, and we hugged after that, so it was like, a normal day of window-shopping for her. Well, I've got a little time to think until we meet again tomorrow. But, I would like advice on this, since I've never kissed a girl before, and this is a new kind of situation for me. BTW, if I could get answers before 08:00 GMT would be nice
 
Last edited:

varanus_komodoensis

they call me Varanus
Well, usually I wouldn't answer it because I feel n00bish about this kind of thing, but I fell really good after what happened today to me (I will talk about it after I end this). Well, the point is: Look like she is what you told her she is. If she is your crush and you said she was your best friend, treat her as your best friend. Try to don't get nervous, and if you feel kinda nervous, try to relax, even if you need to stop the conversation for a while or talk about random things in life. Again, don't try to push yourself towards the limits. If she doesn't know you've got a crush on her, be as secretive as you can, as this can help to get closer to her.

Now, what we all wanted (or not) , my advice-asking time:

I've been friends with a girl for about to 3 weeks. We are nice friends, and I've got a crush on her (she is the new crush I told about in my last post in this thread). I'm not 100% sure if she wants to go forward, but I think it would be right for me to trying to know. Today, we had lunch together, and after walking all over a mall in my city with her and a friend of her, we were alone in the front of her house. I tried to kiss her, but I'm a bit taller than her, so I "missed the target" and it ended up like a normal kiss on the cheek (yes, pretty bad "aim"). She didn't seem to notice what I tried, and we hugged after that, so it was like, a normal day of window-shopping for her. Well, I've got a little time to think until we meet again tomorrow. But, I would like advice on this, since I've never kissed a girl before, and this is a new kind of situation for me. BTW, if I could get answers before 08:00 GMT would be nice

Dude, girls don't not notice when you kiss them, even if it was on the cheek. She knows you kissed her and probably doesn't know what to do. Don't take my word for this, but if she doesn't like you back, she probably would have said something or looked shocked or resisted your advances somehow unless kissing on the cheek is a typical farewell in your culture.
 

Pokémon Trainer Xande

Yu-Gi-Oh Duelist
Dude, girls don't not notice when you kiss them, even if it was on the cheek. She knows you kissed her and probably doesn't know what to do. Don't take my word for this, but if she doesn't like you back, she probably would have said something or looked shocked or resisted your advances somehow unless kissing on the cheek is a typical farewell in your culture.

Well, it actually is, but best used by people "over normal rating" that means, friends, best friends, etc.
 

varanus_komodoensis

they call me Varanus
Well, it actually is, but best used by people "over normal rating" that means, friends, best friends, etc.

So would your crush think it was weird if you kissed her on the cheek, or is that normal between you and her?
 
I've been friends with a girl for about to 3 weeks. We are nice friends, and I've got a crush on her (she is the new crush I told about in my last post in this thread). I'm not 100% sure if she wants to go forward, but I think it would be right for me to trying to know. Today, we had lunch together, and after walking all over a mall in my city with her and a friend of her, we were alone in the front of her house. I tried to kiss her, but I'm a bit taller than her, so I "missed the target" and it ended up like a normal kiss on the cheek (yes, pretty bad "aim"). She didn't seem to notice what I tried, and we hugged after that, so it was like, a normal day of window-shopping for her. Well, I've got a little time to think until we meet again tomorrow. But, I would like advice on this, since I've never kissed a girl before, and this is a new kind of situation for me. BTW, if I could get answers before 08:00 GMT would be nice

Girls will make it very clear when they don't want to go further or to be specific, kiss. You will be able to tell by her body motions and her facial expressions if she's uncomfortable with you trying to make a move on her.

But kissing ..there is no right or wrong answer. When you feel the most comfortable, and you're alone with her, if she seems interested in your company, just stare at her eyes for a moment, if she makes eye contact with you and doesn't seem uncomfortable (as I mentioned before), start moving in closely, but slowly. If she accepts, she should do the same.. and your lips will meet. How old are you guys? Hell it doesn't even matter, you don't have to feel ashamed if you've never kissed someone. Kissing is just something that happens.. and you get better with experience. Just a typical closed mouth kiss on the lips is nothing to worry about. All you got to do is make sure you guys don't turn your heads the same direction or you might have a little embarrassing head bump/nose bump.
 

DrasticPhase

Half ded
What would you guys do? I have 4 ex-friends that hate me and 5 friends that doesn't hate me(I hang out with them with school). I want everything to be neutral with me and that 4 people. I would like to apologize and make everything neutral between us, but they would just be like, "what are you doing here?!?!?!?!"
 

Cipher_Admin

Creepy Coney Man :)
Lately, I have been thinking about wanting to email a classmate of mine via school email (since everybody's email address is the same) that I got along with kinda well from last spring semester. There are a couple problems with it. First problem is that she is friends with someone who I do not get along with well (kind of a long story). Each time I want to send draft out an email to her (the one I got along with in my class), I kept in mind about that other person. Second problem is whenever I want to begin typing it, I have suspicions that she may have a boyfriend, which I want to avoid hearing that. If I heard that, then I would just feel like crap and just have the urge of wanting to go back to the state I was born in compared to where I am currently living. Is there a way for me to feel calm to send her that email? Is saying, "This is *blank* from *blank* back in the spring semester of 2012. Long time no talk, how was your summer break? :)" good?
 
Last edited:

TheotherLati

Ace Trainer Brendan
I'm guessing you've already met her? If not, then how about talking to her face to face and try introducing yourself. And dude, don't worry about beating yourself up if it doesn't work out, there's plenty of girls out there!
 

TheotherLati

Ace Trainer Brendan
I'm a little confused then... why email her, when you can physically meet her and could possibly gain a better relationship from doing so? Talking over email is great and all, but it gets boring after awhile. If you're shy, then I completely undertstand that and could justify your reason for emailing her instead.

As far as friendship is concerned, how does it stand so far? Are you guys close?
 

Cipher_Admin

Creepy Coney Man :)
I'm a little confused then... why email her, when you can physically meet her and could possibly gain a better relationship from doing so? Talking over email is great and all, but it gets boring after awhile. If you're shy, then I completely undertstand that and could justify your reason for emailing her instead.

As far as friendship is concerned, how does it stand so far? Are you guys close?

Well, my friendship with her is pretty good as I had little to no problem talking with her in person. I would email her cuz I am not in school this semester and that I rarely get out of my house. I would eventually bring about hanging out together sometime in person if possible via email.
 
Last edited:

Roseheart95

El Psy Congroo
What would you guys do? I have 4 ex-friends that hate me and 5 friends that doesn't hate me(I hang out with them with school). I want everything to be neutral with me and that 4 people. I would like to apologize and make everything neutral between us, but they would just be like, "what are you doing here?!?!?!?!"

Depending on how recently whatever happened to make them dislike you, maybe give it some time before trying to apologise. But I think you should try at some point or another, even if they're not going to accept it. Then there's not really a lot you can do...
 

Lethal Llama

Random Trainer
Well this is painfully awkward. I'm not even sure if such a post is allowed here but I don't really have anywhere else to ask.
I want to get "involved" with a person and they're all for it too, but I have never been "involved" with anyone before. I really don't want to ask my parents this, and I can't go to a doctor without their money. Should I get myself checked before getting "involved" with this person and if so, where? Thanks in advance, any advice is appreciated.

God this feels so inappropriate on a Pokemon forum....
 

varanus_komodoensis

they call me Varanus
Well this is painfully awkward. I'm not even sure if such a post is allowed here but I don't really have anywhere else to ask.
I want to get "involved" with a person and they're all for it too, but I have never been "involved" with anyone before. I really don't want to ask my parents this, and I can't go to a doctor without their money. Should I get myself checked before getting "involved" with this person and if so, where? Thanks in advance, any advice is appreciated.

God this feels so inappropriate on a Pokemon forum....

It's alright; this is certainly not the first time this subject has come up in this thread. In my opinion, you really should get checked, and your partner needs to get checked, too. You getting checked is to protect your partner - if your partner has something that he/she could pass on to you, you won't know unless they see a doctor as well. I tell my college students this in our health lab - you CANNOT know if someone has a disease just by looking at them. MANY diseases can lie dormant in the body and be completely asymptomatic, but they can still be passed on.

I also recommend that you only stick with one partner. When you "get involved" with someone, you are "being involved" with EVERYONE that they have been involved with, and passing on anything they give you to other people before you even know you have it. That is why you get checked out by a doctor, and NEVER have more than one partner.
 

Lethal Llama

Random Trainer
It's alright; this is certainly not the first time this subject has come up in this thread. In my opinion, you really should get checked, and your partner needs to get checked, too. You getting checked is to protect your partner - if your partner has something that he/she could pass on to you, you won't know unless they see a doctor as well. I tell my college students this in our health lab - you CANNOT know if someone has a disease just by looking at them. MANY diseases can lie dormant in the body and be completely asymptomatic, but they can still be passed on.

Thanks. I hate to badger, but any advice as to where? My parents don't know about the other person and I'd rather not talk about it to them. Do you think it is the wisest/only way to talk to them, or could I find my own way?
 

Prelude

Prelude
Girls will make it very clear when they don't want to go further or to be specific, kiss. You will be able to tell by her body motions and her facial expressions if she's uncomfortable with you trying to make a move on her.
protip, a lot of guys don't read into body language as well as girls expect them to

Well this is painfully awkward. I'm not even sure if such a post is allowed here but I don't really have anywhere else to ask.
I want to get "involved" with a person and they're all for it too, but I have never been "involved" with anyone before. I really don't want to ask my parents this, and I can't go to a doctor without their money. Should I get myself checked before getting "involved" with this person and if so, where? Thanks in advance, any advice is appreciated.

God this feels so inappropriate on a Pokemon forum....
good god just say sex. use a condom and you probably wont have problems?
 

TheotherLati

Ace Trainer Brendan
Well, my friendship with her is pretty good as I had little to no problem talking with her in person. I would email her cuz I am not in school this semester and that I rarely get out of my house. I would eventually bring about hanging out together sometime in person if possible via email.

I'd ask her for her number when you're writing her an email. Call her up and ask what she's up to the following weekend. It's not asking her out per-se, but it's a day dedicated to just you and her, plus it gives you a chance to get to know her much better than you do now.

Just don't pull any moves and you should be good :)
 

Cipher_Admin

Creepy Coney Man :)
I'd ask her for her number when you're writing her an email. Call her up and ask what she's up to the following weekend. It's not asking her out per-se, but it's a day dedicated to just you and her, plus it gives you a chance to get to know her much better than you do now.

Just don't pull any moves and you should be good :)

Yeah, but I don't think getting her number on the first message would be a good idea since I think that it would freak her out. I know that I have freaked girls out in the past and I most certainly do not want it to repeat. I would just say "Hey, what's up?" or something along those lines. Each time I look at the message I am going to send to her, my heart gets all pounding and I get extremely nervous, hoping it won't land into the wrong hands. I haven't talked to her during the summer since pretty much nobody looks at their school email at that time.
 
Last edited:

CovertNinja

Pokemon Master
Okay, Homecoming is this saturday, is it too late to ask her? Even if I don't know her very well?
 
Top