Heyya again,
So I'm now split up/on break (however she wants to define it) with my (now ex-) girlfriend and I've been finding it a bit hard to deal here and there. Although it's kinda acting like a self-fulfilling prophecy in that the way it's panned out has shown me that it probably was the right thing, I feel like it didn't have to happen that way just yet, and I really wish it didn't happen the way it had, and I feel like she's failed to understand where I was coming from when I said I had some issues that were on my mind - she just automatically says it's my fault because I had the issues... though really, I felt like they were on my mind because of her in the first place. I feel like getting this off my chest, but I'm not sure if it would really help anything, me or her. Plus, she does say that when it's "not so raw", she'd like to catch up and maybe be friends again, but right now she feels she has to cut herself off from me completely. Whilst I can deal with not talking to her, I would rather be able to, but I guess in the long run that wouldn't make things better (acc. to her anyway). So do you think I should get something like that off my chest? She has basically put all the blame on me which I think isn't fair, and in all honesty, her somewhat-selfishness in a lot of the relationship was what made me have second thoughts (I posted earlier if you want a spiel about things). While I raised my concerns more in a "let's see if we can get through these together", because she deemed that we couldn't, then it was my fault. I am starting to resent it more the more I think about it, and I know that we shouldn't get back together, but I still feel like I gotta tell her that.
However, the other thing is that I still care about her... doesn't really make sense, but feelings hardly ever do, despite being rational about why it broke up. I want to know that she's ok, but I can't really do too much apart from asking some of her friends, who aren't really the best indicators all the time. Here's a moral dilemma for you all though: ages ago, she told me her password for some uni account, but then on a whim (because my memory is elephantine) I tried it on her fb account and it worked... What do you think of me logging into her account and maybe like, checking her messages with friends just to see how she is? I can go in without her knowing, leaving no trace, and it would at least give me some understanding of her situation since she won't talk to me, yet I still care about her. Is it just too wrong though?