The Renegade saga

[The Burnt Shadow]

Okay here's my second fan fic. I hope it turns out well because the other on sucked!

The Renegade Saga

Chapter 1
The adventure and legend begins

Deep in the foggy mists of the sky pillar a small prison like headquarters lies, surrounded by a moat and trenches. It was night and it was raining hard, but it was all calm. Then all of a sudden a loud siren coming from the base rings. Soon grunts dressed in black coats with captain like hats rise from the walls and turned on the lights searching for someone. In the base, a boy who had messy black hair, who was about 15 and had the same uniform as the people on top of the walls was panting heavily as he leaned on a dark balcony on top of the walls. Then all of a sudden the lights had shown brightly on him. Soon grunts surrounded him they all were holding Houndooms at him. Houndoom is a devil dog pokemon the evolved form of Houndoor. It was colored black it had two horns and skeletal bones in its back. They growled trying to take a bite out of the boy with their razor sharp teeth. The boy looked at the pokemon with disgust as the Houndooms barked at him while their saliva slowly drooled out of their vicious mouths.

“Give it up Shade you can’t escape this time,” says a girl about the boy’s age, she wore the same uniform and had Tyranitar next to her.

Tyranitar was a huge green dinosaur pokemon.

“Sorry Grace but my time in staying in this living heck ends!” Shade says with a smirk.

“I like you Shade but you’ve got to be taught a lesson,” Grace said,” But I could give you another chance if you take my hand.”

She slowly let out her hand to the boy. Shade looked curiously at her. She smirked

“What do you say?” she asked.

Shade looked nervously at her hand then instantly turned around to jump.

“Stop him!” Grace ordered.

Tyranitar instantly opened its mouth wide and shot a giant sphere of energy from its mouth. Shade then jumped off and the attack struck the balcony concluding to a huge explosion.
Shade was luck to have gotten off the building but now he’s plummeting off an island to the sea. Everybody on the building looked down at the raging ocean. They couldn’t see Shade anywhere just some ripples in the ocean.

“Ma’am should we conduct a search party?” a grunt said.

“No,” Grace said,” Let’s just give him a running start.”

They all take their eyes off their betraying comrade and returned inside. Back at the raging sea Shade manages to grab onto a piece of board as he floated deep into the abyss. The next day he woke up in a nice sunny beach. He got up and noticed his arm was flowing with blood. He tore off a part of his coat and wrapped it around his wounded arm. He noticed he was still in his uniform so he tossed one of his pokeballs. Then a Blaziken came out. Blaziken was a mix off fire and fighting. Shade tossed a berry to Blaziken. Blaziken quickly snatched with its mouth. Shade took another berry and ate it.

“Alright Blaziken lets go,” Shade said.

But then he noticed Blaziken taking something out of the sand. Blaziken returned with a shiny gold medal with Swellow wings and a picture of him and Grace. He took the medal and glared at it. He threw it away in the sand. Blaziken was confused and asked why did he throw it away.

“I don’t want to relive those horrible memories you and I’ve experienced back there,” Zeke replied.

Blaziken nodded. Then he took the small picture of him and Grace. He smiled at it and kept it in his pocket.

“We should first check out where we are,” Shade said.

He took out a pokenav and clicked on a few buttons. The mini computer then showed a map of the region of Kanto.

“We’re in Kanto!?” Shade said with astonishment.

Blaziken too was surprised. They were both shocked to find out that they’re in one of the far regions from Hoenn. Shade looks in the pokenav to check exactly where they are. The pokenav puts a blinking yellow light on Vermillion city, the main port of Kanto.

“Blaz, Blaz, Blaz Blaziken”

“We can’t just go on a ship!” Shade said,” You know how much a ticket costs?”

Blaziken then sighed and went back to its pokeball in a red flash. Shade decided to look around the port city for a while. Back in the sky pillar a huge computer screen showed a map of Kanto. It had a blinking blue spot pointing on Vermillion.

“Ma’am Shade’s been located,” a grunt said.

Grace was meditating in a dark room and the only light that shown was where Grace was meditating. Grace slowly opened her eyes.

“Capture him,” Grace said coldly.

The soldier nodded. Soon an alarm went off.

“ATTENTION ALL PERSONEL REPORT TO FLIGHT PORT”

Soon twenty grunts reported armed with their own pokemon. Soon a small door opened. Then twenty of black plated Skamories came out. Skamory was a metal bird normally plated with silver. It had red feathers. Soon each of the grunts rode on the Skamories. Another door opened revealing an exit to the sea. All the Skamories flew off in the shining horizon. But soon the sky was eclipsed by the Skamories. It was like a cloud of darkness devouring the sky. Back at the pillar Grace was watching in the screen her army slowly entering the region of Kanto.

“Ma’am I don’t understand,” the soldier said,” why do you want to recapture him, if he was already banned from the Black Rayquaza brigade?”

“Because my socially challenged minion he has something that I want.” Grace said.

Ironically, back at Vermillion Shade has entered a fiesta. There was plenty of food, streamers, people and trainers and of course pokemon. Shade decided to look around. He noticed a giant gold plated statue of a man with a moustache.

“Uh excuse me?” Shade asked a girl,” what’s the celebration for?”

“Oh you’re not from here,” the girl said, my name’s Reyna we’re celebrating Vermillion’s twenty-fifth anniversary since the man who discovered Vermillion! The man’s name is Chris there’s a statue of him there.”

The girl pointed to the same golden plated statue he saw earlier. Then later there was a huge crowd he got pushed and he fell into a battle arena. He looked around and saw plenty of people cheering.

“WELL HERES A NEW CONTENDER TO BATTLE VERMILLION’S CHAMPION, REX!” a narrator shouted.

Shade then turned around and saw a boy with messy brown hair, A purple jacket, normal brown jeans and a black shirt.

“So you’re the next chump I’m gonna beat the hell out of today eh?” Rex said,” well get yourself ready ‘cause here’s a trainer who had fifty wins and… zero losses.”

Shade was impressed but he wasn’t scared. H was about to say that he just got pushed into the battle, but then Blaziken’s ball statrted to shake. Shade looked at the transparent pokeball. Blaziken looked like it wanted to fight so he just accepted the match.

“Let get started!” Rex said,” Typlosion I choose you!”

Soon a pokemon with flames in its neck appeared. Typlosion was all pumped up. The flames around its neck burned even more.

“Hmm, Typlosion the volcano pokemon,” Shade said,” never fought one of those before.”

“Will you stop yer yapping and start fighting!” Rex said impatiently.

Shade then tossed Blaziken’s pokeball up to the sky. Blaziken popped out roaring. The flames on its hand burned up.

“WHOA, A BLAZIKEN YOU DON’T SEE THAT EVERYDAY IN KANTO.” The narrator said.

“I don’t care if I don’t know about it I’ll just kick its butt old school!” Rex said,” Typlosion flame wheel!”

Typlosion then curled up then rolled towards Blaziken while it was rolling it turned to a big ball of fire. Blaziken then leaped out of the way with its powerful legs. Typlosion then uncurled and stamped its foot heavily on the ground. Blaziken then quickly lost balance on the ground. Before it could notice Typlosion struck Blaziken with the flame wheel. Typlosion laughed at Blaziken for its poor accuracy. Blaziken weakly got on its legs.

“Man this kid’s a joke,” Rex mocked,” Typlosion finish it with another flame wheel!”

Typlosion roared and started rolling quickly towards Blaziken. Blaziken watched Typlosion quickly attack it.

“Blaziken now!” Shade called out.

Blaziken’s eyes widened. It quickly caught Typlosion’s head. The audience was astonished with Blaziken strength.

“What the?” Rex said confused.

Blaziken then kept a tight grip on Typlosion’s head and started to spin round and around. Typlosion was getting dizzy. Then after five spins Blaziken tossed Typlosion in the air. Typlosion was flying above all dizzy. As Typlosion was about to reach Blaziken’s head. Blaziken’s leg burnt hard and quickly did a spinning kick. Typlosion relieved the powerful attack and was thrown over to the other side.

“Typlosion’s unable to battle Blaziken wins!” the referee said.

The crowd cheered.

“WOW THIS IS THE FIRST LOSS REX HAS EVER HAD! WELL THERE’S A FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING,” the narrator said.

“I can’t believe it!” Rex said,” I never lose!”

“First time for everything,” Shade reminded.

Shade then threw a red, juicy and plump berry at Blaziken. Again Blaziken caught it with its mouth. Then Blaziken instantly regained strength. Suddenly The sky turned black. Everybody looked up. The soldiers on the Skamories have arrived.

“Oh no,” Shade said fearfully.

Soon the grunts jumped of the Skamories and safely landed on the ground. They all released one pokemon from their belt. Soon Vermillion was under attack by pokemon. Everybody was screaming like hell. Then soon it started to rain heavily. Thunder and lightning struck from the sky.

“Search the area!” a sub-leader said,” find Shade.”

Shade instantly recalled Blaziken and went to hide in the pokemon center. Suddenly he heard Reyna scream. He looked around and saw her cornered by an Aggron, Nidoking and Tyranitar and three of the grunts. The pokemon were about to take her.

“Leave her alone!” Shade shouted,” You want a piece of me then come and get me!”

The three pokemon grinned and started to charge. Shade then grabbed Blaziken’s pokeball and waved his finger.

“You forgot one thing though,” Shade said to the soldiers and the pokemon,” I’m the best.”

In another part of the city there was plenty of mayhem.

“Sir no sign of him,” a grunt said.

“Well then… what the?” the sub-leader said.

He noticed a huge explosion in another part of the city. In that part of the city Blaziken had a grip on Nidoking’s neck and threw Nidoking down. Nidoking heavily panted and slowly fainted. Aggron’s armor plate was badly crushed. Aggron was lying on a wall. Tyranitar was thrown into a wall. As for the trainers they lay on the ground motionless.

“You okay?” Shade asked Reyna

“I guess so,” Reyna said shivering.

“Halt!” the sub-leader said,” we’ve got you surrounded.”

Shade turned around and saw fifteen pf the soldiers behind him. Shade smirked. He grabbed Reyna and tightly held on Blaziken. Blaziken quickly leaped onto a building putting Reyna and Shade on top of the building for safety.

“Nowhere to run boy,” a female grunt said.

Blaziken, Shade and Reyna turned around and saw two other grunts wit two Scyther. Scyther was a mantis pokemon with two swords and razor sharp wings. Blaziken now faced his opponents. The Scyther and Blaziken were glaring at each other. Suddenly they the three of them leaped of the building to strike each other. Blaziken’s hands and legs started to blaze a powerful flame not even the rain could extinguish. The Scyther prepared their swords. Back down the other grunts watched the battle above from below. But they were shocked to see what was happening. The two Scythers were falling and were covered in flames. Thy both crashed down on the muddy and dirty ground. The rain slowly extinguished the burns they received from Blaziken’s flames of fury. They wondered what happened to the other two grunts from above. But then the two grunts hats slowly fell down covered with flame and ash. Blaziken leaped of the building to face all the other grunts.

“Give it up!” Shade said,” I don’t want to hurt you anymore so just retreat.”

“Never!” the sub-leader screamed.

“Well then I’m sorry,” Shade said.

Blaziken started to attack. It roared along with the thunder. All the grunts and pokemon attacked except for the sub-leader. He was horrified to see such great power Shade’s Blaziken was unleashing. All the pokemon were being trashed along wit their trainers. Until finally they all lost and the one left was a grunt and the sub-leader. Blaziken then reached out to grab the sub-leader with its deadly hands. But the sub-leader pushed the grunt and the grunt was attacked by Blaziken instead. As the grunt was being taken away the sub-leader was running away. He could hear the scream of agony from his fellow grunt. He reached out a phone from his pocket and called for the Skamories to come and collect them. The Skamories then flew on their way to pick them up. Soon the sub-leader was panting thinking he was safe. But soon an explosion occurred that came from Blaziken. The sub-leader had his leg bruised so he tried to crawl away quickly. While he was squirming away a paw stepped in his way. He look up and saw an Absol. Absol’s a darkness pokemon with beautiful white fur and a horn in the side of its head. The sub-leader was crawling with fear. Absol grinned and raised the horn in its head. You could hear the sub-leader scream like hell as Absol swiped the man with its horn. Far out in the city Shade, Blaziken and Reyna could hear the faint cry. Shade then recalled Blaziken.

“Not much damage has been done to your city,” Shade said,” but I’m sorry about your fiesta.”

“Don’t worry,” Reyna said,” it’s not much of a biggie, so are you gonna collect badges?”

Shade nodded.

“I’ll start out here.” Shade said,” but first I think we should get some rest.”

Reyna nodded. So they went off to the pokemon center.

In the middle of the night the flock of Skamories came and carried them to the sky pillar. Grace wasn’t at all surprised that they lost.

“No matter, if we want to defeat him we must send someone with his standards of pokemon battling,” Grace grinned.

She then took out a golden locket with a picture of her and Shade. Then she turned her eyes to the computer. She clicked on a button which opened the speaker.

“Send out Kahn to retrieve him,” Grace said.

Then she silently enters her meditating room and slams the door shut.

Well hope you liked it.

 

[IceKing]

Good Things
Original
Nice climatic action
Length
Charachter

Bad Things
Grammar mistakes
Choppy transition
Blaziken seemed like a wild pokemon at first (and he won against Rex rather easily)

Overall its pretty good for a beginner. Keep on writing and you'll get better. I advice you to make the writing flow more nicely and to proofread your work more

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Thanks for the rating I hope this sounds better now.

Chapter 2
The day of the DJ

It was bright and shining at the port city Vermillion. Shade had just woken up from the pokemon center. He exited the pokemon center stretching as the sunlight touched his face with its warm rays.

“Mmm… what a good way to start my new life,” Shade said.

Then he was followed by Reyna, the girl he met and saved from the clutches of his former comrades.

“Hey so you need me to tell you were the gym is?” Reyna asked.

“Uh yeah now if you could direct me,” Shade said.

“Sure!” Reyna said,” It’s the least I could do since you saved me from those hordes of maniacs back there.”

“Uh yeah…” Shade said.

“Come on let’s go!” Reyna said.

She grabbed Shade’s hand pulling him straight to the gym. As the progressed to the gym the rough streets of Vermillion were crowded with shops, souvenir shops, people and tourists.

“Heh haven’t seen these kinds of streets since I was five,” Shade silently said to himself.

“What you say?” Reyna asked.

“Uh nothing,” Shade said,” I better not tell her that I was one of those thugs who attacked her.”

Back in the depths of the sky pillar, Grace is silently watching Shade in the streets through a wide screen computer.

“Heh, so my young ally trying to forget about your past eh?” Grace said,” well you might at least stop trying because you will never forget those deceased memories and I will bring you back to my side and nobody will stop me. Not even that berserk bonded Blaziken of yours!”

“Ma’am Kahn has arrived,” a sub-leader announced.

Soon a rapper with red spiky hair, black shorts, rubber shoes, a black T-shirt with a blue dragon on it, silver sunglasses and a chain on his shorts appeared.

“Heh I doubt this mere rapper will be even a challenge for Shade,” the sub-leader mocked.

Suddenly he felt a sharp pain in his spine. He slowly dropped to his knees and lied down fainted. He was struck by Kahn with his chain strapped to his arm.

“Don’t ever underestimate a rapper,” Kahn said.

“Guards take my sub-leader to medical care,” Grace said as she snapped her hands.

Two guards slowly picked up the sub-leader on the mat and quickly went away.

“Now you know your mission,” Grace said.

“Don’t worry big G I won’t fail,” Kahn said smoothly.

“Good because you know what the penalty for failure is,” Grace said.

Kahn nodded and slowly departed into the shadows. For Grace she kept a close eye on Shade who‘s nearing the Vermillion gym.

Back at Vermillion Shade is pounding on the gold plated doors of the gym, trying to get in.

“Darn! The doors must be jammed,” Shade said,” it looks like I’ll have to melt my way in.”

“Uhh Shade,” Reyna said nudging him.

“What?” Shade asked.

“It’s closed,” Reyna said pointing at a nearby sign.

Shad turned around and saw a sign which said “NOTICE GYM OPENS AT ONE P.M” He looked at his watch and noticed it was only eight A.M.

“Darn! What am I supposed to do for three hours?” Shade asked.

“Well I wondering if you could help me train my pokemon a bit?” Reyna asked.

“What?” Shade asked.

“Well I’m sort of a beginner,” Reyna said blushing.

Shade wasn’t at all surprised but he just pretended to be surprised.

“Well fine who’s your beginner?” Shade asked.

“Well it might be a little embarrassing but I’ve got a…” Reyna said.

“You’ve got a what?!” Shade said with a horrified look.

“A Feebas! That’s right she’s my first pokemon” Reyna said happily,” isn’t she cute? I call her Nina.”

Reyna took out Feedbags from its pokeball and started hugging it. Shade slapped his face.

“I’m not trying to stop you from keeping that pokemon but,” Shade said,” do you have any idea how long it takes to train one?”

“Yes but it’ll be worth it!” Reyna said,” besides I hear it will turn to a beautiful Milotic, by the way what level does it evolve?”

Shade shook his head in disbelief.

“You don’t level it up to evolve it,” Shade said,” You have to make it super beautiful which is almost impossible!”

“Yeah but still,” Reyna said happily.

“Fine I’ll help you,” Shade said with a sigh,” I’ll help you train it and I’ll answer any pokemon question.”

“Well okay,” Reyna said,” where do you exactly come from?”

“No personal questions,” Shade answered,” you know why w don’t find a better place to talk?”

“Okay!” Reyna said.

Reyna took him to an outskirt of Vermillion. It was a clearing with blue skies, clear water, green grass, plenty kinds of friendly pokemon and a herd of Tauros grazing. Tauros looked like a big bull with four tails. Yup everything was calm and quiet except for the Zangoose and the Sneviper trying to rip each other a part. Zangoose was a mongoose pokemon with a mark on its eye that looked like a scar. It was red and white and had ferocious claws. Sneviper was a black serpent with parts of purple and yellow on it. Strangely Shade thought this was a perfect place to talk.

“Okay here’s my next question,” Reyna said,” Your Blaziken was really powerful, it was fighting with out of control as if it were wild, how did you train it like this?”

“Well I didn’t really train it,” Shade said,” Blaziken just used the beserk bond.”

“What kind of attack’s berserk bond?” Reyna asked.

“Technically it’s not an attack it’s a talent,” Shade said,” This talent is acquired between a trainer and a pokemon at birth.”

“So you and Blaziken were born on the same time?” Reyna asked.

“Correct,” Shade said,” after birth the trainer and pokemon receive the talent berserk bond. Once this talent has been given the pokemon and the trainers skills and emotions are combined to make each other powerful.”

“What do you mean that the trainer’s skills and emotions combined will make them more powerful?” Reyna asked.

“Well if the trainer’s skills and emotions are combined they will understand each other more and will have a really close relationship which make their power of the heart stronger,” Shade explained,” and also they can both understand each others feelings.”

“Wow,” Reyna said with amazement,” but how’ll you be able to meet with the pokemon if you were just born?”

“Well normally when a pokemon goes on its own it will search for its rightful owner and once they meet they will instantly know each other,” Shade said.

“Wow!” Reyna exclaimed. Sneviper and Zangoose were right next to Reyna listening as well.

“Hey! Don’t you two have something to do?” Shade asked.

Zangoose and Sneviper looked confused but when they faced each other they started wrestling again until they suddenly roll of the plain. Shade sighed.

“You got any other question?” Shade asked.

“Oh yeah what happens if…”

Suddenly an explosion occurred. Shade quickly grasped Reyna in his arms and jumped away.

“HEY YA ALL DJ KAHN’S IN THE HOUSE!” the rapper announced.

Kahn appeared with one of those DJ spinning things.

“That was such a touching story,” Kahn said,” that’s the reason why big G wants me to get ya your special berserk bond talent!”

Shade gently put Reyna on the ground.

“Try and get me,” Shade smirked.

Kahn grinned and released Hitmonlee and Ludicolo. He then took out two records from his back and started spinning them rapidly. The two records made such immense music. Hitmonlee then got on his head and started to spin. Ludicolo then started jumping and clapping its hands doing the Mexican hat dance. Shade released Blaziken. Blaziken then leaped into the air to smack Ludicolo with its fierce claws. But Hitmonlee got in the way and knocked away Blaziken with its powerful legs. Blaziken quickly landed on his feet. But then Ludicolo came to Blaziken jumping and clapping. Blaziken was confused. After jumping and clapping around Blaziken, Ludicolo smacked Blaziken’s head with its small hands. Blaziken then started to go all dizzy.

“Let’s bring on the heat!” Kahn cried.

He started to spin the records harder and the music started to make a booming voice across the land. All the pokemon were annoyed by the music that they tried to cover their ears with grass. But as the music got louder Hitmonlee and Ludicolo started dancing even more!

“My pokemon were trained by the music!” Kahn shouted out,” The music pattern tells them what attack to do and also as the beat goes high my pokemon’s powers increase up to the sky!”

“So that’s your strategy eh?” Shade pondered,” Blaziken mimic their strategy.”

Blaziken nodded. He then started to tap his foot a few times. Then as the music progresses he dances along with the beat. He then got on the ground and started to spin on his hands. As he spins his legs blaze up to a scorching spinning blaze kick. It then got close to Hitmonlee and Ludicolo then kicked and burnt there sorry bottoms.

“Want to copy the master eh?” Kahn asked,” you’re in for a treat 'cause we're bringing up the heat!”

Kahn then put the volume higher making an incredibly powerful sound. He also started to spin the records even faster. Ludicolo then jumped up high into the air and preformed a body slam in the form of a swan dive. Blaziken got smacked by Ludicolo onto the ground with a huge bam. Ludicolo got off Blaziken. Hitmonlee then clapped its hands using the helping hand attack. Ludicolo then fired a razor leaf above it. The leaves gently went down like a feather. As they went down Ludicolo took a bow as if it was performing to an audience.

“Looks like I win this little dance contest,” Kahn said proudly.

“Not quite,” Shade smirked.

Kahn lowered his shades to see Blaziken. Blaziken instantly got up on its feet like a ballet. It then tip-toed over to Ludicolo and gently raised it up on its head. Ludicolo just played along with out suspecting anything. Suddenly Blaziken rose up to the sky gently with its legs. Ludicolo was enjoying itself. But then Blaziken made a sinister grin. It blaze up its hands and made a tight grip on Ludicolo. Ludicolo then realized it was a trap! Blaziken still on the air summoned most of its strength, burn Ludicolo with powerful crimson flame and threw Ludicolo to the ground. Hitmonlee gasped in shock as Ludicolo came hurdling towards it. Ludicolo looked like a falling star descending from the skies. Ludicolo lands on Hitmonlee with stars in its eyes. Blaziken slowly and gently lands on the ground and takes a bow.
Kahn starts grinding his teeth together as he raises the music volume and starts spinning the records faster. Ludicolo and Hitmonlee instantly as they hear the booming music, Hitmonlee and Ludicolo start to Tango. Blaziken then starts doing a waltz. Reyna watches the pokemon dance and fight at the same time. She finds it both amusing and funny. Soon pokemon near the area come and watch the performance. Reyna then wonders what Shade has in his mind. Now Kahn’s getting really frustrated, every time his pokemon gets a blow he raises the volume and spins the records faster. The DJ machine starts to heat up as the pressure on the machine continues. A bit of smoke slowly rises from the machine but Shad doesn’t notice. Finally he puts the volume on Max and calls all his strength to spin the records. The pokemon continue to dance. Then Blaziken goes on one foot hopping around. He then tips over a rock and falls down full of sweat.

“I win! The master reigns forever!” Kahn laughed.

But then his DJ machine soon catches on fire and explodes. Ludicolo and Hitmonlee stop dancing when the music stopped. They pant for air as they brush of the swat on their heads. Kahn weakly got up from the scraps of his DJ machine.

“Eh doesn’t matter,” Kahn said confidently,” Ludicolo, Hitmonlee finish ‘em off!”

But Ludicolo and Hitmonlee ignore the rappers order and just stand their.

“What the?” Kahn said confused,” I said finish them what’s wrong with you?”

But they continue to stand. Reyna doesn’t understand what happened. The pokemon saw that the dancing stopped so they just went away.

“I’ve noticed that your pokemon attack when music starts playing,” Shade said.

“Yeah so what?” Kahn asked.

“So you said that the music patterns tell them what to do,” Shade said,” so that means they’ve been ordered by the music so many times that they think their master is the DJ machine not you.”

Kahn was shocked to hear that he wasn’t the one in actual control of them.

“Not to worry I brought some songs I sang in a radio!” Kahn said.

He put the radio on play and it released some awfully bad music. Reyna, Shade and Blaziken covered their ears to stop the horrible music from coming to their ear drums.

“I don’t’ care if the music sounds horrible!” Kahn screamed,” the music will still order Ludicolo and Hitmonlee to attack!”

Ludicolo and Hitmonlee got up and started to dance. But instead of attacking Blaziken they turned around and attacked Kahn.

“What’s going on here?” Kahn said trembling.

“You’re a fool, good music allows your pokemon to attack us,” Shade shouted,” but if you let them hear bad music well that’s something else.”

Ludicolo and Hitmonlee leap up into the air and strike Kahn. They rip his shirt, break his glasses and punch off some of his teeth. He quickly recalled them back to their transparent pokeballs.

“It doesn’t matter I’ve still got this!” Kahn grinned.

He took out his chain, tied it up to his hand and went charging towards Shade.

“Look out!” Reyna cried.

But Shade ignored her and just stood there. Kahn got closer and he was about to strike his Shade’s nose but he instantly disappeared.

“What happened?” Reyna asked.

“It doesn’t matter now,” Shade said gruffly.

Blaziken weakly stood up and spat out some saliva. Shade recalled Blaziken and walked up to Vermillion. Reyna just stood their watching him.

“He maybe a friend and a hero,” Reyna thought,” but he’s still like a stranger, Heh maybe I’ll get to know him a bit better along the way.”

She smiled and tried to catch up to him. Back at the Sky pillar Kahn is facing Grace in her meditating room.

“But big G I was out maneuvered by Shade,” Kahn said,” anyways what’s so special about that little prick?!”

Grace then opened her eyes widely and angrily glared at Kahn who was right behind her, she snapped her fingers. Soon some large footsteps came echoing in the room. Kahn got frightened and took a few steps back. Then in the shadows behind him two mean yellow eyes appeared, and then two large green arms grabbed him from behind. He started to scream in agony as the pokemon grabbed him and tore him a part.

“If you’re going to beat him up Tyranitar at least do it somewhere else,” Grace said.

Tyranitar then made a goofy grin and exited her chambers along with Kahn.

“Fools…” Grace said in her mind.

 

[Kiyohime]

Hmmm....your grammar and spelling are extremely medicore, and it gets too uneven and choppy at times. Also, you keep switching tenses in the middle of a paragraph.

Blaziken instantly got up on its feet like a ballet. It then tip-toed over to Ludicolo and gently raised it up on its head. Ludicolo just played along with out suspecting anything. Suddenly Blaziken rose up to the sky gently with its legs. Ludicolo was enjoying itself. But then Blaziken made a sinister grin. It blaze up its hands and made a tight grip on Ludicolo. Ludicolo then realized it was a trap! Blaziken still on the air summoned most of its strength, burn Ludicolo with powerful crimson flame and threw Ludicolo to the ground. Hitmonlee gasped in shock as Ludicolo came hurdling towards it.

That was past tense, which is how most fanficitons are written...but...this...

Ludicolo lands on Hitmonlee with stars in its eyes. Blaziken slowly and gently lands on the ground and takes a bow.
Kahn starts grinding his teeth together as he raises the music volume and starts spinning the records faster. Ludicolo and Hitmonlee instantly as they hear the booming music, Hitmonlee and Ludicolo start to Tango. Blaziken then starts doing a waltz. Reyna watches the pokemon dance and fight at the same time. She finds it both amusing and funny. Soon pokemon near the area come and watch the performance. Reyna then wonders what Shade has in his mind. Now Kahn’s getting really frustrated, every time his pokemon gets a blow he raises the volume and spins the records faster. The DJ machine starts to heat up as the pressure on the machine continues. A bit of smoke slowly rises from the machine but Shad doesn’t notice. Finally he puts the volume on Max and calls all his strength to spin the records. The pokemon continue to dance. Then Blaziken goes on one foot hopping around. He then tips over a rock and falls down full of sweat.

...was present tense. Bad, bad, bad. There's absolutely no reason to be switching tenses in a situation like this, so it comes out as making very little sense.

Your description is alsp extremely lacking, and barebones. I cannot picture what's happening at all, because what description you have isn't good. For example, you say Ludicolo landed with stars in its eyes. That does not mean fainting...Xs or swirls would have been a better choice. Most of your problems revolve around that aspect of the descriptipon, as well as grammar/spelling. It would be a wise choice to use a grammar/spelling check in your writing program before posting the chapter.

..::Scrap::..

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Well thanks for the comments I had a feeling this would happen.

 

[Eneko55]

EEP! Sorry. Bad day...
The plot so far has been ok-ish, I found it a little weird but that's just me.
Spelling, grammar and description haven't really improved much since your last fic but Scrap has already mentioned that.
Keeep trying though, you can only get better!

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Okay could you guys answer me this? si my spelling/grammar and descriptoin the only thing bad or does the story have something wrong with it as well?

 

[Eneko55]

Okay could you guys answer me this? si my spelling/grammar and descriptoin the only thing bad or does the story have something wrong with it as well?

I think it's just your spelling, grammar and description. So far, in both your fics, I found the plot to be very good and interesting, a bit iffy in places but still ok. But this is just my opinion.

 

[Kiyohime]

Yes, the grammar and spelling may be causing people to stop reading, because it can be difficult to read. Don't be discouraged, however, you can always use a spellcheck. ^^

..::Scrap::..

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Okay this is just a preview of the next chapter if there are any problms post me and I'll fix it.

Chapter 3
Departure

Shade is now in the battle arena against Lt. Surge, about to face his last pokemon.

“You’re a tough kid but still no match for Electabuzz!” Lt. Surge hollered.

Electabuzz zapped onto the arena roaring like thunder. Electabuzz powered its body with powerful surges of electricity and rushed towards Blaziken. Blaziken leaped out of the way but Electabuzz swiftly grabbed Blaziken’s leg and threw Blaziken to a wall. Blaziken was a bit tired because he had to fight all of Lt. Surge’s pokemon by himself. Electabuzz still charged with electricity went towards Blaziken again. Blaziken leaped up on the air, landed on Electabuzz then kicked Electabuzz’s face while trying to jump off. Electabuzz then powered up with electricity again. It opened its mouth and released a huge ball of electricity. Blaziken then leaped out of the way. The zap cannon attack made an explosion behind Blaziken. The Explosion struck Blaziken from behind. Blaziken weakly tried to get up. Electabuzz grinned as it was about to bring on the final assault.

 

[Eneko55]

That was much better, you're description has very much improved in my opinion. It did, however, seem a little rushed, like you were in a hurry to type it all out and post it.
But, still, it's a definite improvement I'd say!

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Thanks for the comments now I hope the rest is fine.

Chapter 3
Deception and Departure

Shade is now in the battle arena against Lt. Surge, about to face his last pokemon.

“You’re a tough kid but still no match for Electabuzz!” Lt. Surge hollered.

Electabuzz zapped onto the arena roaring like thunder. Electabuzz powered its body with powerful surges of electricity and rushed towards Blaziken. Blaziken leaped out of the way but Electabuzz swiftly grabbed Blaziken’s leg and threw Blaziken to a wall. Blaziken was a bit tired because he had to fight all of Lt. Surge’s pokemon by himself. Electabuzz still charged with electricity went towards Blaziken again. Blaziken leaped up on the air, landed on Electabuzz then kicked Electabuzz’s face while trying to jump off. Electabuzz then powered up with electricity again. It opened its mouth and released a huge ball of electricity. Blaziken then leaped out of the way. The zap cannon attack made an explosion behind Blaziken. The Explosion struck Blaziken from behind. Blaziken weakly tried to get up. Electabuzz grinned as it was about to bring on the final assault.

“It’s all over kid,” Lt. Surge grinned.

“Not quite,” Shade smirked.

He reached out a cube shaped spray called full restore and sprayed it on Blaziken. Electabuzz then released a powerful surge of lightning from its two antennas. But then Blaziken quickly got up, dodged the attacks and rushed towards Electabuzz giving it a powerful blaze kick. Electabuzz instantly got up and spat out some saliva. Electabuzz then bashed its powerful hands on the ground making the earth beneath Blaziken crumble. But Blaziken leaped out of the way in time and released a powerful flame of fury. Electabuzz counteracted the stream of inferno with a powerful zap cannon. The cannon ball of electricity collided with the stream of fire making an explosion. Smoke popped up covering the arena, Blaziken had trouble finding Electabuzz. But then out of the smoke Electabuzz flew against Blaziken’s chest and nearly knocked Blaziken off the battle field.

“Remember kid if any part of your pokemon is out of the field you instantly lose,” Lt. Surge reminded.

Electabuzz then striked its two fists towards Blaziken but Blaziken instantly caught them. Electabuzz smirked and released a powerful surge of electricity throughout Blaziken’s body. Blaziken hollered in pain as the electricity made contact all over his body. Blaziken was slowly being pushed near the end of the arena.

“So that’s your plan eh?” Shade asked,” Blaziken, reversal take down!”

Blaziken weakly nodded. It slowly carried Electabuzz with Electabuzz’s feet up in the air by holding up Electabuzz’s fists. Reyna was in the audience watching Shade in the battle and was wondering how Blaziken could still be so strong. Electabuzz was astonished as well that Blaziken still has the will to go on but Electabuzz continued electrify Blaziken with its awesome electric power. Blaziken then weakly took a few steps forward then threw itself and Electabuzz backwards. Blaziken felt a sharp pain in its back as it did the take down reversal. Electabuzz, still with a lot of strenght, got up to strike a thunder punch. Electabuzz started recharging its body and hand for the attack but Blaziken just grinned. Electabuzz is wondering why Blaziken was smiling when he’s going to be fried. Soon a bell rang.

“The winner is Blaziken and Shade!” a referee shouted.

Electabuzz couldn’t understand why he lost, then he looked down and saw that he was out of the battle arena. Electabuzz then fell on his knees pounded the ground for not seeing through their plan. Lt. Surge went over to his pokemon and told him that he did a good job anyway. Blaziken roared in victory and it soon fell on its knees panting. Shade instantly recalled Blaziken and gave it a rare candy and another full restore. Reyna cheered as Shade was given the thunder badge. Shade almost forgot that Reyna was rooting for her. Later they were sitting down at a nearby store, they were drinking sodas in one of those tables with umbrellas.

“Wow Shade you sure have got skill,” Reyna said.

“Yeah, I’m good,” Shade said.

“But you would’ve gotten that badge a whole lot easier if you had a second pokemon to help you out,” Reyna said.

“Yeah, but its tough finding good pokemon to help you,” Shade said,” Especially when they’re frightened of you.”

“Pokemon are frightened of you?” Reyna asked.

“Uh let’s talk about something else,” Shad interrupted,” you got any more questions you want to ask me about pokemon?”

“Well yeah, could we see some pokemon exhibits in a museum?” Reyna asked.

“Shouldn’t you ask you’re parents?” Shad asked.

“Well yeah,” Reyna answered,” but my parents are both at work and I can’t go in unless I’ve got an elder to join me.”

“Well okay,” Shade said.

Reyna instantly grabbed Shade leaving there drinks behind. But soon an Absol appeared it was the same one that attacked the sub-leader yesterday. Absol got on the table and sniffed the sodas. It then took Shades and drank it all. After drinking the soda it sniffed on the ground trying to get Shade’s scent. It then looked at the pathway Shade gone to, smirked and followed the Shade’s trail. Soon Shade and Reyna arrived at the Vermillion of natural history. Shade sighed.

“Why is it that almost every museum has this name?” Shade wondered.

“Who cares? Let’s go!” Reyna said full of excitement pulling Shade in.

As they go in they notice that there are plenty of exhibits such as Kabutops fossils, Lapras models, etc.

“Wow this place is cramped with new exhibits!” Reyna said.

“Yeah whatever,” Shade replied.

Shade wasn’t very interested with the fossils or ruins. But then something caught his eye. He looks over a glass case and saw a tablet filled with hieroglyphics about the Black Rayquazas, It had strange writings on it and an empty slot shaped like a hand on it.

“Hey Reyna what’s this?” Shade asked.

“Oh that?” Reyna said,” that’s the oldest exhibit they’ve got here; it was uncovered by an archeologist in a secret part of the Diglett Cave. Ooh let’s look at that exhibit of pokemon resurrection!”

“You go ahead I’ll just look at this for a while,” Shade said.

Reyna just went off into the crowd. Shade looked at the rock carefully.

“This is an original Black Rayquaza tablet!” Shade said.

“I see you’re interested in this,” a man in a snazzy suit and who wore black gloves said,” I’m Raymond the curator of this museum; this is an original tablet want to touch it?”

Raymond opened the seal to let Shade touch. Shade was astonished by the tablet. He was about to touch it but then he stopped and used his right hand to touch it. Raymond thought this was a bit odd but he didn’t really care. Shade quietly murmured the inscriptions.

“Attention all visitors the museum is now closing,” on of the clients of the museum said.

“Well it’s closing time I suggest you leave now,” Raymond said carefully putting the tablet back into its case.

“Hey Shade that was such a cool exhibit about pokemon resurrection I just saw you should’ve seen it!” Reyna said.

“Lucky you now do you think I could drop you home?” Shade asked.

As soon as they got out of the museum it started to slowly rain. Absol then caught up with them and took shelter in a nearby tree. Shade then noticed Absol in the tree. Absol then smirked and glared at Shade.

“The one I’ve been searching for,” Absol said in its mind.

While Shade was dropping Reyna home, Reyna asked him a couple of questions. Shade was astonished by Reyna’s eagerness to learn from him. He answered all of the questions for her anyway and told her she’s really attentive to learn from him. After Shade dropped Reyna home he instantly went to the pokemon center because a dark storm was coming. When he got into the pokemon center he was dripping wet. He then went into his room instead of the warm fire place that was in the center of the pokemon center. He then locked up his room and closed the lights. He opened a small light which shown a blue color in the center of the room. He then went into the light cross his legs, closed his eyes and began to meditate. His mind soon entered a dark room filled with stars, planets, etc. He slowly floated upwards, placed his right hand in front of him and opened his palm. His arm began to glow glimmering green. Soon it showed a pyrite map. He then clicked on one of the locations and strange writing, the same kind of text in the tablet from the museum.

“I should’ve known you’d be here as well,” a familiar voice called out.

“What’re you doing here Grace?” Shad said coldly.

“The same reason you’re here,” Grace answered,” searching for answers. I see you’ve found one of the Black Rayquaza tablets.”

“Yes, I know as well that you’re planning to steal it,” Shade said.

“Heh you saw the Absol huh?” Grace asked,” I know you want to use the dragon.”

Shade just glared coldly at Grace.

“I know you Shade you’re like all of us a blood thirsty trainer who wants power,” Grace said,” but you only lack one thing.”

“And what might that be?” Shade asked coldly.

“The heart of a shadow, you have different uses for your special power,” Grace said,” You’d rather use it to protect this world rather than using it to dominate the world.”

“True,” Shade said,” So who’re you going to send to retrieve the tablet?”

“I had in mind Akira,” Grace said disappearing.

Shade smirked and soon disappeared. Back in the museum lightning and thunder roared outside as rain heavily poured down on the ground. Soon a man with a half red mask covering the top part on his head, armored shoulders, a muscular body, white shirt, green pants, grey gloves and army boots stepped in front of the museum. Suddenly an explosion busted out in the museum, the alarm bells started to ring. Then all of a sudden Shade came out with the tablet.

“Heh Grace said you would try and attempt to steal it,” Akira said.

“Well she was correct,” Shade smirked.

“Now hand it over,” Akira demanded.

“Why should I?” Shade questioned.

“Well it’s because I would do this!” Akira said.

He thrusted his fist onto Shade but it went right through. Akira was at shock he tried to punch him but his fist still went through. He tried to grab the tablet but it was also an image.

“Dear, dear simple minded Akira always does thing without thinking,” the image said,” remember I’m the deceiver of the Black Rayquazas so I could create images of myself, oh and you better run the police is here.”

Soon the image disappeared into smoke particles. Then a group of cops came in. Akira just grinned. He instantly rushed inside the museum.

“I think the culprit went inside!” Officer Jenny shouted.

The police searched around but they couldn’t find Akira. They searched every corner including the lavatory and the only exit was being blocked by the police, and they still couldn’t find a trace of him. But they heard a struggle inside the janitor’s closet. They opened the door and found the curator tied up with messy hair.

“Curator are you okay?” Officer Jenny asked.

“Yes but somebody has stolen the tablet,” Raymond said.

“Don’t worry we’ll make a search party,” Officer Jenny said,” We’ll escort you home.”

“Thank you officers,” Raymond said.

As he got into the car Absol screeched at him and grinned. By the time he got home he went behind some mirrors to change and picked up his cell phone to call someone.

“Grace, Shade has stolen the tablet,” Raymond said as he changed.

“Don’t worry Raymond he’ll probably use it to awaken the dragon,” Grace said on the other line.

“What’s should I do now?” Raymond asked.

“I want you to fly to the Sevii islands and find that legend Moltress,” Grace said,” You sure you won’t need any back up?”

“Don’t worry,” Raymond said getting out of the mirrors,” I’m after all Akira the strongman of the Black Rayquazas!”

He hanged up, held his mask and laughed along with the thunder and lightning. Meanwhile in Digletts Cave Shade faces the secret entrance where the tablet’s been discovered. He placed the tablet on the rocky wall where it was taken off. He then removes his glove in his right hand, which had a dragon tattoo printed on his hand to his arm, and placed it on the tablet. Soon the markings and his tattoo started to have a glowing blue aura, the cave then revealed other markings which started to glow as well. Soon two large pairs of glowing yellow eyes appeared in the cave, echoes of footsteps started to sound through out the cave. Then an Aerodactyl slowly descended out of the shadows.

“Aerodactyl, ancient terror of the skies! I have this mark of the Black Rayquazas!” Shade called out,” will you join me in my quest to free this world from utter chaos?”

Aerodactyl slowly looks down at Shade’s marking, it slowly examines the black dragon tattoo printed on his arm, with a final glare it took a few steps to Shade and kneeled down. Shade then threw a pokeball at it and in a few seconds Aerodactyl stays in the pokeball. Shade takes the pokeball and slowly departs from the cave and goes out into the dark, foggy and cold rain. Outside the cold, dark and damp landscape, Shade notices that there was a happy teenage couple walking down; Shade then looked at Aerodactyl in its transparent pokeball.

“Grace is right, I don’t have the will to dominate this world,” Shade said to himself smirking,” but that doesn’t mean I can’t have a little fun from my dark side.”

Shade then unleashed Aerodactyl to attack the teenage couple. While the couple was flirting Aerodactyl appeared from the foggy and dark skies and struck the couple. The teenagers screamed out loud which could be heard from miles away. As Shade watched the couple ran away in fear he laughed out loud like a maniac with the lightning and thunder as the cold rain poured heavily on his hat.
The next morning in Reyna’s house she tells her parents all about Shade.

“Shade sounds like a very interesting person,” Reyna’s mom says.

“Mail for my little princess,” Shade’s dad said giving the mail to Reyna.

Reyna received a small package with a small note. It was a letter from Shade. It said:

Dear Reyna

I’ve left this message to you because I’ll be leaving today in the morning. I know I’m supposed to help you along your journey but I had to leave. When you go along your journey we might meet again. I’ve left you two gifts in the package. You’re a special trainer Reyna. You showed plenty of potential in the past two days because of your curiosity of pokemon. In my eyes you’re already a master in such a short period of time. I hope you’ll mature more into a beautiful young lady.

Love Shade

Reyna then opened the package and found a pokedex and a shining blue CD. She instantly recognized it as a hidden machine. It was the HM surf for her pokemon Nina. She started to go in tears that Shade was already leaving.

“Mom, Dad I was wondering could I start my journey now?” Reyna asked.

The parents looked at each other.

“Sure honey,” her mom said,” you’ve decided to finally relive your dream huh? Well better get your stuff ready.”

As soon as Reyna got ready she left home and waved a t hr parents. Her mother was in tears but hr dad tried comforting her as he waved goodbye. Reyna then looked at her watch and noticed it was only eight ‘O five! The pokemon center opens at eight so she still had time to say goodbye to Shade. She was about to run to the pokemon center but then she saw an Aerodactyl fly above her city like an eagle. She saw on top of Aerodactyl a rider. She instantly recognized the rider as Shade.

“GOODBYE SHADE, I HOPE WE COULD MEET AGAIN!” Reyna shouted in tears as she waved.

In the blue skies Shade saw Reyna from the distance and waved as he flew beyond the bright and shining horizon.

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Okay I might do this often. Here's a preview of th next chap. post me if there's anything wrong that needs corrcting.

Chapter 4
Cold memories

Shade and Aerodactyl stand on the high mountains near Cerulean city. Shade looks over the shining blue city of water. In the mountains the climate was warm and foggy due to some of the hot springs surrounding the area. The mountains were also covered by glaciers of thick ice and snow. He notices that plenty of people were in high spirits and living good lives. He feels sorry for his pokemon because they have to join him in his quest on destroying his own clan. He then takes a good look at Aerodactyl whose eyes burn like a crimson fire at the shining city. He then takes out a piece of raw meat and tosses it to Aerodactyl. Aerodactyl instantly smelled the raw flesh and quickly caught it with its terrible large fangs.

“Hey Aerodactyl,” Shade asked,” I know you take any choice of the one who releases you, but I want to know do you want to really help me?”

Shade easily understands what pokemon says even though he just caught it.

“(I would follow any person who wants to destroy the accursed Black Rayquazas),” Aerodactyl said in a powerful voice,” (by what I said I think you already know what I mean).”

“Thanks Aerodactyl,” Shade thanked.

“(You know when I was released I thought I was going to be owned by another dictator),” Aerodactyl said,” (but you’re different from your clan, you’d rather use your special ability to protect rather than destroy).”

“I noticed,” Shade said.

“(It’s rather strange that you told me to attack the sweet couple though),” Aerodactyl commented.

“Even though the Black Rayquazas I still have this kind of peculiar attitude,” Shade said.

“(I see),” Aerodactyl said, “(Does your Blaziken have the same opinion as mine)?”

“Yes he’s also quite intrigued that I’d rather use our berserk bond ability to protect rather then go with the Black Rayquazas main goals,” Shade said.

Aerodactyl nods, then slowly went inside his pokeball. Shade looks at his two pokemon in their transparent pokeballs.

“I just hope you guys won’t have any regrets on joining me,” Shade said as he walked away.

He then arrives at a sizzling hot spring to do some quiet meditation. He takes out Blaziken and Aerodactyl and asked them if they want to also soak in the hot spring.

“(No thanks,” Blaziken said in a rough tone,” we don’t exactly have memory loss).”

Shade thought that they were making fun of him.

“(No I mean that you need this more than we do,” Blaziken apologized),” we’ll just keep a look out.”

“Suet yourself,” Shade said.

He then placed his clothes in a nearby rock and slowly meditated in the boiling water. The warm current helped his mind focus. But instead of going to the dark room he decided to look within his memories. But like an incomplete video it didn’t start out in his early child hood it began somewhere a little later. He had no memory of his parents or his home town all he remembered is a small five year old boy cowering in a dark cold alley with his faithful pokemon Combusken. Combusken and Shade were facing a dark druid. The druid just flicked his skeletal finger and Combusken was knocked out cold. Combusken instantly went back inside its pokeball. The druid took out his skeletal hand in his sleeves. His bony hand then grabbed Shade’s arm and stared at the glowing tattoo printed on Shade. The druid then took a firm grip of Shade’s arm and pulled him into the dark shadows. This is the only memory he had in a city after that he just remembers being in the sky pillar and how his hate grew, for they did not only abuse pokemon but also the people. Grace was the first friend he made in the sky pillar but as time went on she turned into an attractive young woman whose heart was soon consumed by the shadows. Then soon he opened his eyes because Blaziken was nudging him.

“What is it?” Shade asked.

“(We found something),” Blaziken informed.

Shade didn’t really care but he got into his clothes to see what they’ve found in the frozen tundra. Blaziken lead Shade to a cave Aerodactyl was standing at.

“So what’s so special about this cave?” Shade asked.

“(We found this),” Aerodactyl grunted holding a script.

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Okay I might do this often. Here's a preview of th next chap. post me if there's anything wrong that needs corrcting.

Chapter 4
Cold memories

Shade and Aerodactyl stand on the high mountains near Cerulean city. Shade looks over the shining blue city of water. In the mountains the climate was warm and foggy due to some of the hot springs surrounding the area. The mountains were also covered by glaciers of thick ice and snow. He notices that plenty of people were in high spirits and living good lives. He feels sorry for his pokemon because they have to join him in his quest on destroying his own clan. He then takes a good look at Aerodactyl whose eyes burn like a crimson fire at the shining city. He then takes out a piece of raw meat and tosses it to Aerodactyl. Aerodactyl instantly smelled the raw flesh and quickly caught it with its terrible large fangs.

“Hey Aerodactyl,” Shade asked,” I know you take any choice of the one who releases you, but I want to know do you want to really help me?”

Shade easily understands what pokemon says even though he just caught it.

“(I would follow any person who wants to destroy the accursed Black Rayquazas),” Aerodactyl said in a powerful voice,” (by what I said I think you already know what I mean).”

“Thanks Aerodactyl,” Shade thanked.

“(You know when I was released I thought I was going to be owned by another dictator),” Aerodactyl said,” (but you’re different from your clan, you’d rather use your special ability to protect rather than destroy).”

“I noticed,” Shade said.

“(It’s rather strange that you told me to attack the sweet couple though),” Aerodactyl commented.

“Even though I have left the Black Rayquazas I still have this kind of peculiar attitude,” Shade said.

“(I see),” Aerodactyl said, “(Does your Blaziken have the same opinion as mine)?”

“Yes he’s also quite intrigued that I’d rather use our berserk bond ability to protect rather then go with the Black Rayquazas main goals,” Shade said.

Aerodactyl nods, then slowly went inside his pokeball. Shade looks at his two pokemon in their transparent pokeballs.

“I just hope you guys won’t have any regrets on joining me,” Shade said as he walked away.

He then arrives at a sizzling hot spring to do some quiet meditation. He takes out Blaziken and Aerodactyl and asked them if they want to also soak in the hot spring.

“(No thanks,” Blaziken said in a rough tone,” we don’t exactly have memory loss).”

Shade thought that they were making fun of him.

“(No I mean that you need this more than we do),” Blaziken apologized,” (we’ll just keep a look out).”

“Suet yourself,” Shade said.

He then placed his clothes in a nearby rock and slowly meditated in the boiling water. The warm current helped his mind focus. But instead of going to the dark room he decided to look within his memories. But like an incomplete video it didn’t start out in his early child hood it began somewhere a little later. He had no memory of his parents or his home town all he remembered is a small five year old boy cowering in a dark cold alley with his faithful pokemon Combusken. Combusken and Shade were facing a dark druid. The druid just flicked his skeletal finger and Combusken was knocked out cold. Combusken instantly went back inside its pokeball. The druid took out his skeletal hand in his sleeves. His bony hand then grabbed Shade’s arm and stared at the glowing tattoo printed on Shade. The druid then took a firm grip of Shade’s arm and pulled him into the dark shadows. This is the only memory he had in a city after that he just remembers being in the sky pillar and how his hate grew, for they did not only abuse pokemon but also the people. Grace was the first friend he made in the sky pillar but as time went on she turned into an attractive young woman whose heart was soon consumed by the shadows. Then soon he opened his eyes because Blaziken was nudging him.

“What is it?” Shade asked.

“(We found something),” Blaziken informed.

Shade didn’t really care but he got into his clothes to see what they’ve found in the frozen tundra. Blaziken lead Shade to a cave Aerodactyl was standing at.

“So what’s so special about this cave?” Shade asked.

“(We found this),” Aerodactyl grunted holding a script.

 

[Eneko55]

Firstly, um, double posting? Not good... *shudders*

Sorry I haven't posted lately, been busy.

Chap03 - An improvement, your description and grammar/spelling have gotten much much better, YAY!!

Preview - Sounds like a good chap, hope you post it soon. There was one thing that bugged me about it, for a preview, it was a little long for my liking but it was good all the same.

Hope you post your next chapter soon!

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Thank you, thank you!

Chapter 4
Cold memories

Shade and Aerodactyl stand on the high mountains near Cerulean city. Shade looks over the shining blue city of water. In the mountains the climate was warm and foggy due to some of the hot springs surrounding the area. The mountains were also covered by glaciers of thick ice and snow. He notices that plenty of people were in high spirits and living good lives. He feels sorry for his pokemon because they have to join him in his quest on destroying his own clan. He then takes a good look at Aerodactyl whose eyes burn like a crimson fire at the shining city. He then takes out a piece of raw meat and tosses it to Aerodactyl. Aerodactyl instantly smelled the raw flesh and quickly caught it with its terrible large fangs.

“Hey Aerodactyl,” Shade asked,” I know you take any choice of the one who releases you, but I want to know do you want to really help me?”

Shade easily understands what pokemon says even though he just caught it.

“(I would follow any person who wants to destroy the accursed Black Rayquazas),” Aerodactyl said in a powerful voice,” (by what I said I think you already know what I mean).”

“Thanks Aerodactyl,” Shade thanked.

“(You know when I was released I thought I was going to be owned by another dictator),” Aerodactyl said,” (but you’re different from your clan, you’d rather use your special ability to protect rather than destroy).”

“I noticed,” Shade said.

“(It’s rather strange that you told me to attack the sweet couple though),” Aerodactyl commented.

“Even though the Black Rayquazas I still have this kind of peculiar attitude,” Shade said.

“(I see),” Aerodactyl said, “(Does your Blaziken have the same opinion as mine)?”

“Yes he’s also quite intrigued that I’d rather use our berserk bond ability to protect rather then go with the Black Rayquazas main goals,” Shade said.

Aerodactyl nods, then slowly went inside his pokeball. Shade looks at his two pokemon in their transparent pokeballs.

“I just hope you guys won’t have any regrets on joining me,” Shade said as he walked away.

He then arrives at a sizzling hot spring to do some quiet meditation. He takes out Blaziken and Aerodactyl and asked them if they want to also soak in the hot spring.

“(No thanks,” Blaziken said in a rough tone,” we don’t exactly have memory loss).”

Shade thought that they were making fun of him.

“(No I mean that you need this more than we do,” Blaziken apologized),” we’ll just keep a look out.”

“Suet yourself,” Shade said.

He then placed his clothes in a nearby rock and slowly meditated in the boiling water. The warm current helped his mind focus. But instead of going to the dark room he decided to look within his memories. But like an incomplete video it didn’t start out in his early child hood it began somewhere a little later. He had no memory of his parents or his home town all he remembered is a small five year old boy cowering in a dark cold alley with his faithful pokemon Combusken. Combusken and Shade were facing a dark druid. The druid just flicked his skeletal finger and Combusken was knocked out cold. Combusken instantly went back inside its pokeball. The druid took out his skeletal hand in his sleeves. His bony hand then grabbed Shade’s arm and stared at the glowing tattoo printed on Shade. The druid then took a firm grip of Shade’s arm and pulled him into the dark shadows. This is the only memory he had in a city after that he just remembers being in the sky pillar and how his hate grew, for they did not only abuse pokemon but also the people. Grace was the first friend he made in the sky pillar but as time went on she turned into an attractive young woman whose heart was soon consumed by the shadows. Then soon he opened his eyes because Blaziken was nudging him.

“What is it?” Shade asked.

“(We found something),” Blaziken informed.

Shade didn’t really care but he got into his clothes to see what they’ve found in the frozen tundra. Blaziken lead Shade to a cave Aerodactyl was standing at.

“So what’s so special about this cave?” Shade asked.

“(We found this),” Aerodactyl grunted holding a script.

The script was old; it had the same markings as the markings he saw on the tablet. So after reading the inscriptions, Shade decided to look around the caverns. Inside the cave it was all dark. Glowing blue markings encircled the caves walls. He could hear their footsteps echoing through the frozen corridors, he heard drops of water descending from the ceiling and he heard the frosty wind roaring throughout the cave. They’ve been walking throughout the cave until they reach a light. When they got there he noticed it was much warmer in this part. There were fountains of hot springs surrounding the area. There were old people whose hair were white as snow, were cross-legged on a rock in the center of each spring. The area was also covered by wild long vines. They walked slowly through the steaming floors until they faced the biggest spring fountain. The rocks holding the warm spring water was carved into a perfect Gyarados sculpture. On top of the sculpture was an old, bald man with orange robes.

“Welcome child,” the old man says,” I’m Kenzo, the eldest monk of the fountains of virtue.”

“I’m…”

“Shade I know,” Kenzo says,” I’ve been expecting you.”

Blaziken and Aerodactyl were astonished. But Shade was suspicious.

“I know that you have got a gap in you memories,” Kenzo said.

Blaziken and Aerodactyl again were astonished, but Shade remained suspicious.

“Come here and I’ll help you regain your lost memory” Kenzo said.

Shade didn’t really trust him but a part of his heart said to do it. So Shade went over to the floating rock crossed his legs and closed his eyes for meditation. He could hear the old man’s voice echo throughout his mind.

“Shade holder of the black tattoo,” Kenzo said,” You’re parents; they were a loving family, until you came in.”

“What?” Shad asked.

“Yes your parent’s saw that you were among the Black Rayquazas,” Kenzo hummed,” they treated you as an equal but in their heart you were an abomination.”

“What? This can’t be true!” Shade screamed holding his head and covering his ears.

“Do not deny the truth!” Kenzo shouted.

Shade then got up screaming. Soon the dead vines around the springs restrained Shade.

“(Shade)!” Blaziken shouted.

Blaziken tried to run to help his friend from the aggressive vines. But soon another pair of vines reached out, grabbed Blaziken, restrained and slammed him to the cave walls.

“(Blaziken)!” Aerodactyl cried,” (Now you’ve done it you baldy)!”

Aerodactyl thrusted its wings against the old monk. But the vines grabbed Aerodactyl’s crusty wings and neck and threw him down to the ground.

“Now let me continue,” Kenzo said,” when it was the year of the Rayquaza they left you in an alley to let the druid of doom find you.”

“No, no!” Shade cried.

“Ask your friend Blaziken,” Kenzo said.

Shade slowly looked at Blaziken waiting for an answer.

“(It’s true your parents did leave you in an alley),” Blaziken said grimly.

Shade couldn’t believe his ears. He slowly dropped his head and slowly went in tears.

“Now you see the truth?” Kenzo asked, rejoin your comrades and they’ll forgive you.”

“(But that’s not the reason why they left you there),” Blaziken continued,” (they left you there to protect you from the druid of doom).”

“What do you mean?” Shade weakly asked.

“(They were afraid that you would be found so they left you in an alley),” Blaziken said,”( they left you in my charge to take you secretly to Goldenrod, but when I tried to get you to the train we were too late the druid had arrived and taken you).”

“But why didn’t they accompany me the station?” Shade asked.

“(The druid could sniff the fragrance of blood of an elder better than a youngster).” Blaziken said,” (your parents perished by the hands of the druid, the last thing they told me was to tell you that).”

But Blaziken was interrupted by a vine that strapped his mouth. Blaziken tried to mumble the words out of is mouth but it was useless.

“Do not listen to him,” Kenzo said,” for he is only a pokemon.”

“Wrong,” Shade said coldly,” he’s more than a pokemon, he’s family.”

Blaziken looked at Shade with amazement. He was shocked that Shade would accept him as a member of the family. Soon a blue aura surrounded Shade’s eyes and body.

“Berserk Bond!” Shade shouted.

Soon Blaziken’s eyes turned to a crimson red. His muscles began to grow; Blaziken soon released himself from the vines. He then went over to Aerodactyl to release him. Blaziken and Aerodactyl rushed over to Shade to help him. Shade went on his knees coughing and panting.

“Nice try Kenzo,” Shade said smirking,” you tried to trick me into joining the Black Rayquazas? Isn’t that right Marik?”

Soon the old man stood and altered himself into a young man, about the age of twenty. He had the same uniform as Shade and had short, spiky and blond hair.

“Very clever my deceptive foe,” Marik said,” but it’s time to end this, Sneasels attack!”

Soon the monks sitting in the springs, stood up and soon changed form into a dark/ice cat Sneasel. The Sneasels started hissing and snapping their paws at them.

“This doesn’t frighten us!” Shade called out.

Soon Blaziken and Aerodactyl jumped into the air. The countless numbers of Sneasels were no match for Blaziken and Aerodactyl and very soon they were all taken out one by one.

“Very impressive my young foe,” Marik commented,” but this is just the beginning.”

Marik clapped his hands and the earth started to tremble. The cave started rumbling, and the springs started to boil harder. The statue Marik was standing on started to tremble. There were two Sneasels in the Gyarados’s mouth. The mouth began to crumble open and the two Sneasels fell into the depths of the statue. Out of the statue emerged the rare red Gyarados of the Lake Of Rage. Red Gyarados was mostly thought to be a shiny version of Gyarados. Gyarados hollered through out the caves making it quake. Gyarados then spat out the two Sneasels it nearly digested. The two Sneasels landed on the caverns covered by saliva. Gyarados looked viciously at its enemies.

“Alright my puny minded serpent,” Marik said,” devour them!”

Gyarados then dug underground into the earth’s crust. For a moment there was silence, but soon the earth began too quake and the red serpent rose from the earth with Blaziken in its mouth. Blaziken was using all of its strength to keep Gyarados’s mouth opened, but Gyarados continued to crush its opponent with its horrible fangs.

“You fool!” Marik mocked,” Gyarados’s teeth can crush steel what makes you think Blaziken could resist this?”

“Gyarados is trying to close its mouth not sink its teeth on Blaziken you ninny,” Shade said.

“Oh okay,” Marik said with a dumb look at his face.

“Look how observant we are,” Shade mocked,” but enough about this Aerodactyl help him.”

Aerodactyl nodded and landed on Gyarados’s scaly back.

“Hah you fool,” Marik said,” Gyarados’s scales are really powerful your Aerodactyl won’t be able to make a scratch on it!”

“Are you really this stupid?” Shade asked,” Aerodactyl’s tickling Gyarados not slashing it.”

“Huh?” Marik wondered with another dumb look on his face.

Aerodactyl carefully slotted its claws into gaps of Gyarados and started to softly scratch. Gyarados the felt a small tickle running through its body. It started laughing manically as its mouth widened releasing Blaziken. Aerodactyl stopped tickling Gyarados then grabbed Shade and Blaziken to give them a lift.

“You idiot!” Marik shouted.

“Look who’s talking,” Shade mocked.

Marik grinded his teeth together and ordered what was left of the Sneasel army and Red Gyarados to attack. Soon Gyarados stopped laughing and swiftly started chasing Aerodactyl. The Sneasel from the bottom fired beams of crystal ice at Aerodactyl. A few of the Sneasels climbed onto Aerodactyl’s tail and wings, a few of them either crashed on the ground, fell off or thrown off by Blaziken. Like normal Gyarados the Red serpent got in rage and released an overheat attack. Gyarados’s body turned from red to ruby red. It released intense flames all around the cave. Some of the flames hit the walls or the Sneasels. But one flame reached out and touched a spring. The spring started to burst into flames.

“You idiot the water’s flammable,” Marik screamed put it out, put it out, put it out!”

The Gyarados sprayed a large foam of water at the burning inferno. After the fire was extinguished Marik noticed Shade’s Blaziken was spraying flames all over the springs. In a matter of seconds the springs were engulfed by fire.

“Gahhh! Put it out!” Marik panicked.

Gyarados then started shaking around and chanted. Soon a dark cloud covered the ceiling and drops of rain extinguished the flames all around.

“Nice try my small foe,” Marik said,” but I’m not that stupid!”

“First of all stop trying to sound smart,” Shade requested,” and second that was just a distraction!”

Shade was on Aerodactyl in the air. Aerodactyl then spun with its wings hardening to a glowing metal and creating a giant hole on the ceiling with its razor blade wings. Aerodactyl flew high up in the air where Shad could see the whole snowy horizon around him. But soon Gyarados and the Sneasels released a light of ice. But Aerodactyl used safe guard which protected itself from the freezing attacks.

“Aright guys do your thing!” Shade said.

Aerodactyl and Blaziken nodded. Aerodactyl roared throughout the mountains. Soon boulders covered with snow raised from the ground surrounded by a crystal blue aura. Blaziken then closed it eyes and small violet flame ignited above Blaziken’s head. The small blaze created copies of itself.
The small violet flames circled around Blaziken a few times and it soon struck the boulders smoldering it with a great brand of flame. Soon Aerodactyl pointed at the cave they’ve just exited and soon the burning boulders came hurdling down like meteors from the sky.

“Gyarados get me out of here!” Marik shouted,” Sneasels use your protect attack to cover me!”

Marik instantly got on Gyarados’s back and slowly crawled away and the Sneasels were just running around in panic. Soon the burnt rocks touched the cave. In a matter of seconds the cave blew up. Shade and his pokemon laughed as they flew off into the skies.

“Hey Blaziken earlier what were you trying to tell me earlier?” Shade asked.

“(I was going to tell you that your parents wanted me to tell you that they loved you with all their heart),” Blaziken said.

“Thanks for being like a brother to me,” Shade said hugging Blaziken.

“(Hey am I family too)?” Aerodactyl asked.

“Yeah,” Shade said,” anyone who joins me is a part of my family.”

“(I’m guessing that means Reyna and Grace as well),” Blaziken added.

“I guess so,” Shade said as they flew to the green city of Viridian.

 

[Mariz]

It looks okay. The only thing I read that was a bit strange was Marik. If he's so stupid how could he trick Shade so easily like that?

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Chapter 5
A new trainer enters

In Viridian city Shade was pretty bored fighting the gym leader. He had a pretty easy win using Blaziken. He decides to go somewhere new. He decided to head of to Johto a far more different world than Kanto filled with different pokemon you don’t really see in Hoenn or Kanto. He takes out Aerodactyl and hops on him. Aerodactyl slowly flaps his wings creating a small sandstorm and glides into the shining ocean.

“Hey Aerodactyl how long would it take you to Johto?” Shade asked lying on Aerodactyl’s back with a straw in his mouth.

“(Well since I’m a really big pokemon and Johto’s the neighboring region of Kanto I’d say about half a day),” Aerodactyl informed.

“Well I can’t wait to see what’s over the horizon,” Shade said,” I’ve been in Kanto for a few days and boy was I bored, anyway since it’s the neighboring region of Kanto we could always come back.”

Meanwhile in the sky pillar. The computer detects that Shade is on his way to Johto. The sub-leader instantly notices this and makes contact to Grace who is on a helicopter hovering above the ocean.

“Ma’am! I’ve just got something that I think might interest you,” the sub-leader said.

Grace put the phone on hands free.

“This better be good!” Grace said,” I have really important business to contend to.”

“But Ma’am Shade’s entering the Johto region!” The sub-leader reported.

“Oh really?” Grace asked with interest,” sub-leader I’m putting you in charge until I return.”

Grace was hovering above the ocean. She took three pokeballs containing A Sceptile, Tyranitar and a Salamence and tied them to her belt. She ordered the helicopter to head back to base. The pilot was confused but when he turned around he saw Grace jump off the helicopter. He though she was nuts, but Grace instantly took out Salamence. Salamence was a blue dragon with red wings and would be considered the Dragonite of Hoenn. Salamence quickly flew away and in a matter of seconds they were out of sight.

“Watch out Shade,” Grace murmured,” An old friend of yours is coming and she won’t return with out you.”

 

[The Burnt Shadow]

Well nobody was replying to the story so I just posted the chap. Sorry if I renamed the chapter though. I hope this chap turns out well...

Chapter 5
Separation of the three greatest powers of time

In Viridian city Shade was pretty bored fighting the gym leader. He had a pretty easy win using Blaziken. He decides to go somewhere new. He decided to head of to Johto a far more different world than Kanto filled with different pokemon you don’t really see in Hoenn or Kanto. He takes out Aerodactyl and rides on him. Aerodactyl slowly flaps his wings and glides into the ocean.

“Hey Aerodactyl how long would it take you to Johto?” Shade asked lying on Aerodactyl’s back.

“(Well since I’m a really big pokemon and Johto’s the neighboring region of Kanto I’d say about forty-five minutes),” Aerodactyl said.

“Well I can’t wait to see what’s over the horizon,” Shade said,” I’ve been in Kanto for a few days and boy was I bored, anyway since it’s the neighboring region of Kanto we could always come back.”

Meanwhile in the sky pillar. The computer detects that Shade is on his way to Johto. The sub-leader instantly notices this and makes contact to Grace who is on a helicopter hovering above the ocean.

“Ma’am! I’ve just got something that I think might interest you,” the sub-leader said.

Grace put the phone on hands free.

“This better be good!” Grace said,” I have really important business to contend to.”

“But Ma’am Shade’s entering the Johto region!” The sub-leader reported.

“Oh really?” Grace asked with interest,” sub-leader I’m putting you in charge until I return.”

Grace was flying in the ocean. She took three pokeballs containing A Sceptile, Tyranitar and a Salamence. She ordered the helicopter to head back to base. The pilot was confused but when he turned around he saw Grace jump off the helicopter. Grace instantly took out Salamence. Salamence was a blue dragon with red wings and would be considered the Dragonite of Hoenn. Salamence quickly flew away and in a matter of seconds they were out of sight.

“Watch out Shade,” Grace murmured,” An old friend of yours is coming and she won’t return with out you.”

As they flew they got closer and in front of them they could see the city of Goldenrod. Her tattoo bleakly beeped an emerald green color. This meant the Shade was in the region. Now in the city of Blackthorn a really popular trainer named Blake was showing of some of his skills to a crowd with his Breloom. Breloom was a fighting type mushroom pokemon originally located in Hoenn. Since there are no Brelooms in Johto or Kanto plenty of people were interested in seeing what Breloom could do. Breloom’s also the evolved form of Shroomish. Blake was a boy about the age of thirteen. He had green hair, a jacket, cap, and jeans colored white with an orange streak. The crowd was going wild to see his Breloom in action.

“All right come down you’ll all get to see Breloom and I catch our new pokemon,” Blake boasted.

Suddenly an Urasing appeared from the forest roaring and going on a rampage breaking trees. Blake instantly released Breloom in the air. Breloom popped out in the sun doing a flip. While Urasing wasn’t looking Breloom unleashed its small arms on Urasing’s face. Urasing stepped back a little rubbing its face. Urasing towered over Breloom. Urasing then unleashed a powerful blast from its fist. But Breloom instantly caught its hand.

“Alright Breloom double kick!” Blake called out.

Breloom still having a grip on Urasing’s hand did a flip and used both of its legs to kick Urasing’s chest and mouth. Urasing hollered in anger. Urasing quickly reached out its long arms and gave Breloom a bear hug.
Breloom was trying to get out of Urasing’s powerful grip but it was no use.

“Breloom sunny day!” Blake ordered.

Breloom’s eyes started to glow golden yellow. The sun’s powerful rays glowed brighter and touched both Urasing and Breloom.

“Okay, Breloom solar beam below you!” Blake called out.

Breloom weakly nodded and placed its small hands together, pointing it to the ground. Since the sun brightly shown a beam of sun energy instantly blew out. Urasing and Breloom quickly blasted into the sky. Breloom forced its arm into Urasing’s chest. Urasing let go in panic, waving its arms. Finally Breloom let out another solar beam. The beam pushed Urasing down to earth. Everybody was at awe.
Urasing roughly landed into a pile of rocks making a hole. Blake took out a poke ball and threw it at Urasing. Urasing was then engulfed by the small sphere and in a matter of seconds it was captured. Breloom landed kneeling. Everybody was cheering and clapping their hands.

“Yup we’re the best,” Blake boasted.

By night fall everybody had returned home talking about Blake and his Breloom. Blake entered the pokemon center giving his pokemon to nurse Joy.

“Boy being popular isn’t easy,” Blake said resting his elbow on the counter.

“Speaking of popular did you hear about the wild Ampharos rampaging around the city?” Nurse Joy asked.

“No, but does it belong to anyone?” Blake asked.

“No but it would be a real treat catching a full grown Ampharos,” Nurse Joy said.

“And it would be another good treat for my fans to see Breloom in action again,” Blake said.

Nurse Joy nodded. Suddenly something flew right past the city making the trees sway and the wind blow.

“What was that?” Blake asked.

In the mountains of Dragons Den Aerodactyl rested on the warm rocks.

“(Ah Dragons Den),” Aerodactyl said with relief,” (The on place where a dragon could go on a rampage).”

“We could rest here for the night,” Shade said.

Aerodactyl yawned closing its wings together and lying on the rocks. Shade pulled his hat down, stretched and went to sleep. Meanwhile Grace who was in the ruins of Alph stood firmly looking at the ruins. Her tattoo began to blink even brighter.

“Shade’s nearby,” Grace smirked.

She slowly ordered her Salamence to use secret power on a part of the mountains. Salamence raised its claws and instantly created a secret room. She and Salamence entered the room. She lit a small candle with a glowing green flame and placed it in the center of the room. Salamence lied down next to the flame and fell asleep. Grace gently patted Salamence on the head. She crossed her legs closed her eyes and floated. She looked like she was meditating but her mind was actually asleep.
The next day Blake and his fans were searching for Ampharos.

“That Ampharos doesn’t stand a chance,” a girl giggled.

All his fans were talking about how Ampharos was gonna get caught. Blake finally noticed Ampharos lying down on the ground with its eyes shut.

“Ready for trouble Ampharos?” Blake called out.

But Ampharos ignored him and just weakly got up. Blake released Breloom. Breloom started charging towards Ampharos about to strike it. As soon as it got closer a pokeball swallowed Ampharos. Breloom was in a shock and got its hand stuck to a wall.

“Who captured Ampharos?” on of his fans asked.

Just then Shade came out holding Ampharos in his palm. Everybody kept on murmuring “Who’s that guy?”
Shade then noticed Breloom trying to force its hand out of the wall.

“Hey cool Breloom you don’t see that everyday,” Shade said.

“Yes,” Blake said helping Breloom out,” and who are you?”

“The name’s Shade,” Shade answered.

“Well Shade how do you like my Breloom?” Blake asked,” It’s really rare.”

“Breloom’s rare but its basic form isn’t,” Shade said.

“How would you know?” Blake asked.

“You can find a whole lot of ‘em in Hoenn,” Shade said.

“Right,” Blake said,” and what pokemon have you got to top my Breloom?”

“My pal Aerodactyl,” Shade said.

“What?” Blake mumbled.

Aerodactyl came stomping right next to him. Aerodactyl towered on all of them. Everybody was at amazement to see a giant prehistoric pokemon in front of them.

“Well Shade how about you and your Aerodactyl come join me and my fans to Dragons Den?” Blake asked.

“Sure why not?” Shade said.

He recalled Aerodactyl and followed Blake to Dragons Den. Inside was a dark cave filled with Dratini and Zubat. As always Blake was showing off. He was showing off that he could read dragon language. Shade then noticed an ancient tablet with the symbols in the Black Rayquaza tablet.

“Hey Blake what’s this one say?” Shade asked.

“Oh that?” Blake said,” it’s an ancient tablet prophecy written in a very old text which nobody has interpreted for a while. It’s written in the text of all pokemon type languages and English, people are having hard time interpret this since people usually know at last only three different pokemon languages.”

Everybody was at awe by Blake’s knowledge. Shade took a look at it and murmured the words.

“Well it says three great powers will rise to form a savage battle which is about tonight,” Shade said,” and it also says at the near end of the battle begins the dark lord Anubis will rise from the black sand to separate these powers.”

“How do you know?” Blake said.

“The language isn’t written in all pokemon languages and it isn’t partly English,” Shade explained,” It’s written in dark, dragon and Coptic, an ancient Egyptian language that isn’t used anymore.”

Everybody was amazed by Shade’s knowledge as well.

“How do I know that it really says this?” Blake asks

“Well I could just do this and there,” Shade said.

He placed his hand onto the tablet. A shining blue aura surrounded the text and the words instantly transformed to pure English. Everybody was again amazed by Shade’s power and started praising him.

“Okay enough of this,” Blake said,” Now Shade the reason I brought you here was I wanted to challenge you to a battle.”

“Fine how many pokemon?” Shade asked.

“It will be a sudden death match,” Blake said.

Shade agreed and tossed out Blaziken to face Blake. Everybody was at awe by seeing Blaziken. Blake started to fume with rage and instantly released Breloom.

“Let’s do this!” Blake shouted.

Breloom came running towards Blaziken tightening its fist. Breloom nearly touched Blaziken if it weren’t for Blaziken blocking with its arms. Blaziken quickly caught Breloom’s arm and threw it into a wall. Breloom was smashed into the rocky wall making a few cracks beside it as it slowly fell down. Breloom shook its head and started charging towards Blaziken. But since Breloom was so aggressive and did things without thinking it didn't notice Blaziken kneeling down and instantly was instantly slashed with an uppercut on its chin. Breloom went flying out of Dragons Den and into the grass outside the ice caves. Everybody went out to see what happened. Blaziken popped out of the hole in the ceiling and landed in front of Breloom whose head was flowing with blood. It began to rain heavily. Breloom felt the rain touch his face. Breloom’s eyes weakly opened concentrating on Blaziken. Its fists tightened.

“Blaziken look out!” Shade called out.

But it was too late Breloom had quickly got up stabbing Blaziken with its fists. Blaziken felt great pain flow all over his body. Breloom’s right fist started to glow and used a focus punch on Blaziken’s chest. Blaziken went flying back to a pile of rocks nearby. Breloom walked up to Blaziken and grinned. It let out a brutal war cry as the thunder air screamed. Breloom’s hands started snapping and was about to stab Blaziken’s chest with its pointy hands. But before Breloom could even touch Blaziken a long vine reached out restraining Breloom’s arms. They looked up and saw Grace with a Sceptile next to her. Sceptile was the evolution of Grovyle. It had a leafy tail and yellow spheres in its back.

“Hey a bloody battle and nobody invited me?” Grace said,” I’m offended.”

“Listen lady this battle’s between me and the new kid,” Blake said.

“On the contrary my fellow trainer battles always include me!” Grace said.

Suddenly Sceptile’s vines tightened around Breloom’s arms. The vines then threw Breloom into a lake. Breloom fell in with a splash. Sceptile hopped of the giant rocks looking for Blaziken. But the time Sceptile got there Blaziken was gone. Sceptile turned its head side ways looking for Blaziken.

“You’re starting to forget my techniques old comrade,” Shade said.

Down below two arms grabbed Sceptile’s legs and sunk them into the ground. Blaziken quickly burrowed out of the ground and gave Sceptile a powerful kick in the face. Sceptile rubbed its face. Sceptile quickly got off the ground and threw a great mass mud the rain had made. Blaziken blew a blast of fire hardening the mud and cracking it into pieces. Breloom jumped out of the water kicked both Sceptile and Blaziken in the face. Blaziken and Sceptile were knocked down to the wet ground. Breloom let out a mighty roar, waving its hands in the air and laughed at the two fallen pokemon.

“That’s showing ‘em Breloom!” Blake laughed.

Grace and Shade coldly stared at Blake. Sceptile and Blaziken got up grinding their teeth together at Breloom. They held each others hands and thrusted Breloom into a rocky wall. Sceptile and Blaziken did a high five, but Sceptile instantly smirked and threw Blaziken. But Blaziken was well prepared it took a tight grip on Sceptile’s hand and threw her onto Blake’s fans. The fans scattered away in fear, most of them left for safety. Up to five stayed somewhere near, safe and continued to watch.
Breloom from behind grabbed Blaziken’s chest and body slammed Blaziken into the mucky ground. Sceptile then unleashed a powerful punch with its thin arms. Breloom went flying into another pile of rocks. Sceptile was about to pick up Blaziken, but Blaziken thrusted its arm into Sceptile’s eye. Sceptile hollered out in pain as it covered its eyes. Blaziken coughed and rubbed the muck of its face and went to Sceptile and Breloom.
This bloody battle lasted for a long time until the three pokemon standing by the side of their trainers. The trainer’s hearts have been consumed by the shadows, now all they were focusing on was winning. Blaziken rubbed its jaw and spat out some blood from its mouth. Sceptile shook its head and tightened her muscles. Breloom had two black eyes but it was still grinning. It snapped its hands as blood slowly dripped. The rain came pouring harder as the pokemon coldly glared at ach other. Thunder and lightning struck from the sky several times. It was like the world mourning over this vicious battle. After one cold glare from each of them they roared out loud as thunder and lightning screamed along with them. They were charging viciously at each other all battered and bruised and all covered in blood. But before they could even touch each other the muddy ground began to burst into flames transforming into ashes. Th ash filled arth open in the center.

“Stop this bloody clash!” a booming voice called out.

Instantly the muddy ground turned into ashes. A blue aura beam came out of the ground. Rocks began to tremble and the wind began to blow even harder making the trees bow. The dark clouds began to circle as the light reached space. Out of the ground a pokemon silhouette with glowing white eyes appeared. It looked like it had the body of a Mewtwo and the head of a Blaziken. It was Rukario.

“The prophecy had come true!” Shade said.

“You mean the Egyptians considered Rukario as the dark lord Anubis?” Blake asked.

The pokemon started to walk back in fear. Rukario clapped its hands and looked directly at Grace and Sceptile. He pointed a powerful blast of psychic energy at Grace. Soon the lavendar energy beam swallowed up Grace and Sceptile. Rukario then set its eyes on Blake. Blake instantly recalled Breloom and started running like hell. But soon Rukario placed another energy hole into the ground. A steel chain emerged from the hole and wrapped itself around Blake’s leg. The metal chain started to pull Blake down to the hole. Blake was all screaming as he tried to hang on for dear life. Almost half of his body was consumed by the energy hole. He tried to keep a tight grip on the burnt ground but soon four other rusty, crackling chains emerged grabbing his arms, other leg and neck and quickly consumed him into the hole. The hole slowly closed and faded as his scream echoed in the rain.

“I never was meant to emerge from the earth but you three have started a battle that was to continue until death,” Rukario boomed,” Now you must pay the price.

Blaziken let out a blast of flames from its mouth but Rukario raised its paw and shape shifted the flames to a fire serpent. The fire serpent attacked Blaziken, but Shade instantly recalled Blaziken and took the hit of the inferno snake. Shade weakly lay on the ground with burnt bruises, he just lay their helplessly as Rukario blasted another beam at him. He weakly closed his eyes as the psychic energy consumed him. Around him colorful diamonds sparkled around him as he fell deeper into the energy hole.

“It’s over,” Rukario said.

Rukario clapped its hands separating the dark clouds, the wind calmed and thunder and lightning slowly faded. Rukario slowly descended back to the ground. The five fans who saw this instantly reported this to the city. In the evening there was a funeral. There were three grave stones lying on the ash covered ground. The whole city was there offering hope to the departed trainers. But unknown to the whole regions these three haven’t departed from this world.

 

[Eneko55]

Ah! I did not get that that was a preview that was before chapter five, I think you should've made that clearer.

Very good chapters (the ones I've missed), I've noticed now that the length of your chapters is growing longer and the description has improved since I last read, well done!

The only thing that bothered me was the appearance of Rukario. I just felt that having Rukario in it was a little iffy cos we don't really know much about it and all that. It's your choice entirely who or what you have in your fic, I am merely saying how I felt about it. I am, however, interested in seeing what else will happen with Rukario.

Anyways, chapters are good and lengthy with more description than before, well done once again.