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The Skull of the Cubone

Well, after a quick querie to my pal, fhqwhgads, I've decided to write my first fic. I'll write a prologue first, and I'd appreciate it if I got some reviews from members, negative or positive. OK, here goes:
==Prologue==

Andrew and Andrea, the twins and troublemakers of Cianwood City, have lived in their small town for 9 years. They both are approaching the age of 10. Both twins own a Cubone, which are also twins. They have asked there mother many times how she recieved two Cubone to their isolated city, but her response was always the same, "You're too young". This frustrated and puzzled the twins greatly. Then, when their 10th birthday arrived, they decided to celebrate with a bang. They stole Berry Juice from the Medicine Man's old Shuckle. They were caught though, and immediately taken to their house. Their mother let slip about their father, saying, "Your father would be ashamed!". Their father had never been brought up before, and the twins eagerly pressed their mother for details. Eventually, she gave in and told them. 10 years ago, their father had contacted their mother from Lavender Town, where he had important business. Through their home PC, he told her that he was being pursued by unknown men. He told her to save the two baby Cubone he had found in the Poke'mon Tower. Startled by her husband's appearance and story, she accepted. The Cubone were sent through the PC, in return for two Magikarp she had found while fishing. The connection was severed seconds after the two Great Balls arrived. She never heard from him again. The twins, worried and determined, decied to set out to search for their long-lost father. Their mother disapproved of this, and forbade them from going. There was a bigger problem. All of their past crimes had given them a criminal record, forbidding them from leaving Cianwood City, or even Johto itself. Join Andrew and Andrea, and their twin Cubones, as they evade authority, meet strange, new, and dangerous Poke'mon, and uncover the extraordinary and surprising secrets of their father and their Cubone's mysterious past in The Skull of the Cubone!!!!!!

__________________________________________________________
Chapter 1: An Unothodox Birthday

"MISSSSSS!!!!!! DREEEEAAA!!!!!!" rang out across Andrew and Andrea's room. Andrew miserably punched it. At the same time, a Politoed's voice rang out as well, which met the same fate.

"I HATE those alarm clocks! Why couldn't Mom have bought the Lugia and Ho-oh alarm clocks? They were even half off!" Andrew declared wearily.

Andrea shrugged. The noise had awoken Andrew's Cubone, making it angry. It raised its club at the clock.

"No, Cubone! Don't........actually, if you want to-," Andrew said, interrupted by their mother's call of "BREAKFAST!!!!".

They walked slowly downstairs, followed by Andrew's Cubone. "Whassfer breakfast?" Andrew mumbled.

"Well, I bought some Moomoo Milk-," their mother said, regretting it instantly. The twins snapped to alertness and chanted loudly, "Moomoo Milk! Moomoo Milk! Yay!".

Their mother smiled briefly, amused by her children's cries in unison.

"Yes, Moomoo Milk! I bought some Rice Krispies, too!" she shouted, trying to make herself heard.

"Hold on, let me wake Cubone," Andrea said. Andrew hastily poured milk into his bowl, and switched his bowl with Andrea's. Andrea returned, followed by her Cubone, rubbing its eye wearily. Andrew watched eagerly as Andrea ate a spoonful, and gagged. Andrew laughed madly while Andrea spit out the cereal into her trash can.

"Andrew!!!" You switched the bowls, right?" Andrea demanded as Andrew laughed.

"Ye-y-yes!!!" Andrew stuttered, barely managing it.

"Cubone, Bone Club!!!" Andrea ordered.

"Cubone!!" Cubone cried, throwing its bone at Andrew. It hit him in the stomach, knocking out his breath.

"ANDREA!!" their mother called angrily, "Why on Earth did you make Cubone attack your brother?".

"Moooom, he switched our bowls!!" Andrea whined.

"I hardly see why the difference between your bowls gave you the right-,"

"He had milk in his cereal!!! I hate milk and cereal!!" Andrea protested, interrupting her mother.

She rounded on Andrew, "Is this true?" she demanded of her son, eyes narrowed.

"Yes," Andrew said dully.

"Why do you two pick on each other like this?!? You're on thin ice, both of you!!!" she said angrily.

Andrea and Andrew both frowned and exchanged glances. They knew this meant they were in trouble and not to get their mother angry again. There would be no mischief today, unless they sought to be grounded.

"Why don't you two go outside? It's a beautiful day!" their mother sugggested.

"As beautiful as it gets in Cianwood City," Andrew muttered quietly. Their mother's eyes narrowed even further. Both marched regrettfully out the door.

"What do you want to do?", asked Andrea.

Andrew thought a while. "We could visit the Seer," he suggested. "All right," Andrea said, not feeling very excited.

The twins main activity was to cause mayhem in Cianwood, but not today. Being grouded was an unpleasant experience for them. The twins reached the Seer's house on the outskirts of town after a few minutes of walking. Andrea knocked on the door. No one answered.

"She's not home," Andrew said spirits sinking further. Of all the inhabitants of Cianwood City, the Seer was the only one who enjoyed the twins' company. Even Chuck, their local Gym Leader, was displeased to see them.

Andrea and Andrew gloomily retreated to their favorite beach side rocks. They watched their Cubones frolic for a couple of minutes, Andrew's chasing Andrea's.

"Well, there goes the day," Andrea said, fiddling with her long brown hair in a bored manner. Andrew did the same, but his hair was much shorter than his sister's, so there was hardly anything he could do with his hair.

Suddenly, Andrea's Cubone tripped over something and it's head became lodged in the sand. The twins hurried over to help it. Andrew's, however, did not seem to notice. It ran around for exercise, and then decided to go to Andrea and Andrew's secret hideout, clearly thinking they were still supervising it.

Something was blocking the entrance though, a large, blue, sleeping something. Cubone aproached it, misinterpreting it as a friend. An unfamiliar voice called out, "DON'T TOUCH THAT SUICUNE!!!!".

The Suicune awoke abruptly, and dashed off across the water. Cubone watched it until it was no longer visible. It turned its head, ready to head back to Andrew, but saw the legs of a man blocking escape. It looked up and saw a man in pure white clothes, speechless with anger.


The man opened his mouth to speak as Andrew ran down the beach. "Hey!!!" he cried, before the man had said anything to Cubone, "What're you doing to my Cubone?!?"

The man turned to Andrew. "Your Cubone has just scared off a very rare and beautiful Poke'mon!!!" said the man. "I have spent my entire life searching for a Suicune, and your Cubone has ruined my best chance at capturing it!!! I, Eusine challenge you to a battle!!".

Andrew had never battled before. Now that he thought of it, he was officially going to be a trainer tomorrow. He probably should have practiced. As he was about to refuse, Andrea sprinted down the beach along with her Cubone, head liberated from the sand. andrew's cubone seized the chance to rush to andrew's side. Andrew petted it as Andrea rushed up to him and asked "What's happening?", eyeing Eusine.

Andrew straightened up and said "This man, Eusine, has challenged me to a battle." "Well, trainers can't refuse a battle offer. You'll have to accept," she said.

"But I'm not a trainer!! I don't know how to battle!!" he cried out desperately, hoping to change his sister's mind.

"Wing it," she said stubbornly, and turned to Eusine "He accepts, on one condition. I will battle alongside him. Andrew has only his Cubone, while you have three Poke'mon(she eyed his belt, which held three Poke'balls)."

Eusine sneered, "All right, you may battle with your brother," clearly confident that he would win. Eusine stepped to the opposite side of the beach. He called out to Andrew, "OK, then, let's begin!"


"Go, Drowzee!" Eusine cried.

The Drowzee appeared out of the white Poke'ball, crying out "Drowzee!!", in an eerie, deep voice.

Andrea drew her Poke'ball, "All right, then. I choose-",

"Hold on. I should go first, this is my battle," Andrew said. "Oh, I suppose," Andrea said, clearly disappointed.

"OK, go Cubone!!!" Andrew said. Eusine's Drowzee and Cubone stared each other down.

"Don't be intimidated, Cubone!" Andrew called nervously as Cubone's legs shivered slightly. "Drowzee, Hypnosis!" Eusine ordered. Drowzee's eyes glowed blue and Cubone's eyes began to droop.

"Cubone, uh......Use Bone Rush," Andrew commanded. Cubone threw its bone at Drowzee, but weakly. Nonetheless, it worked and Drowzee lost focus. Cubone awoke immediately.

"Cubone, hide behind that rock," Andrew said. Cubone scurried behind the nearest rock, followed by Drowzee's eyes. Drowzee slowly walked over to the rock. When it reached it, it uttered "Drooowwwww".

Cubone foolishly looked up. "Now, Drowzee!!! Hypnosis!!" Eusine ordered. This time, the Hypnosis worked to its full effect. Cubone curled up on the ground and fell asleep quickly.

"Drowzee, Psychic!!!" Eusine told it. Cubone was lifted off the ground, surrounded by a blue aura. "CUBONE!!!" Andrew desperately cried, seeing it float over to the ocean. He knew nothing good would come out of Cubone submerging. Cubone awoke instantly, but it was still trapped. An idea occured to Andrew.

"Cubone, drop your bone," he said. Cubone stared at him distrustfully, but obeyed. Drowzee glanced downward down at the bone. The blue aura disappeared from Cubone. Apparently, Drowzee needed to keep Cubone in its sight for its attacks to work. Andrew seemed to have realized this, too.

"Cubone, kick sand in Drowzee's eyes," Andrew ordered. Andrea watched curiously as cubone kicked up sand. For once, she had no idea what her brother was planning. Drowzee wandered around blindly, eyes stinging. It finally opened its eyes, but Cubone was nowhere to be seen. Drowzee checked behind the rock near the sea.

"Cubone, Bone Club!!" Andrew commanded. Cubone threw its bone with all of its strength at Drowzee. Drowzee looked up, and tried to stop the bone with a Confusion, but it was too late. The bone hit Drowzee squarely in the forehead, knocking it out.

"We won!!! We won!!!" the twins cheered as Cubone jumped up and down in celebration. "Beginner's luck", Eusine scowled, recalling Drowzee, "But this time, it won't be so easy!!!!".



"Go, Electrode!!" Electrode came out, making a robotic cry. "MY turn, then," said Andrea, itching to battle.

"This should be easy, my Cubone has the advantage," she said, loud enough for Eusine to hear. "We will see," Eusine said. "Electrode, Rollout!!" Eusine said. Electrode rolled toward Cubone. Cubone panicked and ran away, Electrode close behind. "Bonebonebonebone!!" Cubone cried frantically.

Andrea thought quickly, "Cubone, Dig!!". Cubone swiped at the ground while running, creating a rut. Electrode got caught, but got out in half a minute. Cubone ran again, and Electrode smiled.

"Cubone, in front of the rock," Andrea ordered quickly. Cubone stood there as Electrode advanced. Electrode, overconfident, picked up speed. "Cubone, jump!!" Andrea ordered. Cubone did, and Electrode collided hard with the rock. Dazed and dizzy, it rolled towards Eusine, thinking he was Cubone. "No, Electrode, it's over there!!" Eusine said, jumping out of the way.

Cubone laughed, angering Electrode. Electrode rolled faster, face set in an unpleasant frown. Cubone ran in front of the nearest rock. Electrode came on very quickly, advancing a few feet every two seconds. "Cubone, Strength!!!" Andrea called out to Cubone. Cubone picked up the rock and threw it at Electrode, angering it further and damaging it considerably.

Electrode became very angry and blew itself up a few feet from Cubone. "Cubone!!!" Andrea called, worried.

Cubone ran out of the smoke and to its owner's side. A deep hole was in the sand, and next to it, a smaller hole. It seemed Cubone had dug a hole to save itself from Electrode's(who lay blackened and knocked out in the large crater) Explosion.

Cubone was hurt though; the hole couldn't cancel out the blast completely. "Perhaps you two are good trainers after all," Eusine said resentfully as he returned Electrode to its odd white Poke'ball.

"But, you stand no chance against my next Poke'mon. You may use both of your Cubone; their combined efforts may inflict some damage. However, if both are knocked out, it counts for double, and I shall win."

"Fine", "Fine", Andrea and Andrew replied in unison. Both Cubones
strutted into the field. "All right then, let's finish this", Eusine said, grabbing his third and final Poke'ball.



"Go, Haunter!" Eusine said. The ghost came out it's ball, making no cry.

"Haunter, Shadow Ball!!!!" Eusine said, before the twins had a chance to command their Cubones. The Haunter fired two Shadow Balls. Andrea's Cubone avoided it very nearly, but Andrew's was hit full force. It flew into the rock wall, and collapsed.

Haunter glided past Andrea's to Andrew's, still limp on the ground. "Cubone, help Cubone!!!" Andrea called out. Cubone sprinted past Haunter and dug a hole around Cubone, sinking it into the ground and protecting it. Andrea's Cubone threw its bone at the Haunter, but it merely passed through.

Andrew's got up and ran to a rock, waiting for instructions. Andrew thought, but nothing occured to him. "Haunter, Lick!!" Andrew suddenly realized he had left Cubone open. "Cubone, jump!" He said quickly. Cubone barely escaped. Then, an idea occurred to Andrea.

"Andrew!!" she hissed. "What?" he whispered back. "Have your Cubone Smash Rocks. Find a shell of a Shuckle. Then, make Cubone stir its bone inside of it and grow mold. Tease Haunter and wait for it to Lick. Cubone will raise its bone, and Haunter will Lick it. That'll hurt Haunter, and perhaps knock it out," she told him. "Are you sure?" he asked uncertainly.

"What else can we do?" she replied, "Normal and Fighting attacks don't affect Ghost Types, and apparently Ground Type attacks don't either. Those are the only type of attacks our Cubone know!!". "OK," Andrew said, still a bit dubious.

"Cubone, Dig!!" Andrea ordered, ignoring the smirk on Eusine's face. "Cubone, Smash the Rocks," Andrew said. Both obeyed. Andrea's stayed underground, but Haunter put its hands right through the ground towards her Cubone. Andrew's was still smashing rocks.

Then, as Andrea's jumped out of the hole in fright, Andrew's found a Shuckle shell, which was conveniently empty. "Cubone!!! Stir your bone inside the shell!!" Andrew ordered. Cubone stared at Andrew, as though to inquire whether or not he had gone mad, but it obeyed. Eusine heard this too.

"Haunter, after the other Cubone!!" Haunter advanced on Andrew's. As Haunter grew only a few feet away, Cubone's bone turned sickly green. "Haunter, Shadow Ball!!!" Eusine commanded.

Haunter shot another ball, but Cubone avoided this one. "Quickly, Haunter, Lick!!!" Eusine said, hoping to catch Cubone off guard. Cubone was ready though. As Haunter shot out its long tongue, Cubone held up its bone. After a few moments, Haunter's grin turned to a frown and a dull greenish hue crept up its face. Just as Andrea had predicted, Haunter was knocked out.

"WE WON!!!! WE WON!!!" the twins cried happily, hugging each other. The two Cubone did the same. Eusine was not happy.

"I have underestimated you two," he said to the twins, "You should consider careers as trainers." Eusine walked to his speedboat, which he must've arrived there on, and climbed aboard.

"Remember, though, you two still owe me for chasing off Suicune!!!" Eusine cried out as he sped away.



"Cheeldren!!" cried out an old, accented voice. The twins turned their heads, and saw the Seer marching towards them. "Hello, Ms. Seer!!!" Andrea and Andrew called in unison.

"Hey, I'm here too!!" a younger voice shouted. The twins turned to the old wooden rowboat the Seer had used to row back, and a young boy was running to them. "Oh, hi Mitch," Andrea said, while Andrew waved. Mitch's fiery red hair and white T-shirt blew wildly behind him as he sprinted towards them.

"Grandmom and I saw the whole battle, and you were great!!" Mitch exclaimed.

"Yes, quite eempressive for cheeldren your age," the Seer said, smiling. Andrew and Andrea grinned widely back, glad to have the Seer praise them. "You should ask your mothair to take you to the Whirl Isles, sometime. You might catch some interesting Poke'mon there," the Seer said.

The twin's smiles faded. "Our criminal records don't allow us to leave Cianwood," Andrew muttered, staring at the white sand seeping into his sandals. "Oh, whaht a peety. Would you two like eet eef I vas to ask Chuck to allow you to the Whirl Isles?" she asked. The twin's smiles returned instantly, "We'd love it!!" they cried in unison. The Seer smiled once more.

"Why don't you ask your mothair first? If you can't go, eet would be pointless to ahsk," the Seer suggested. "OK," Andrea said, not at all happy. She was sure their mother would never allow them to go to the Whirl Islands. "G'bye, guys!!" Mitch said. "See ya, Mitch," Andrew said.

The two walked from the Seer's house, sulking. "What do you think we can say to convince Mom to let us go?" Andrea asked dully. Andrew thought, and after a while, he said, "We could tell her about the battle. Maybe that would convince her that we're responsible enough to hold our own in those caves." "You know, that's not a bad idea," Andrea said hopefully, "Let's give it a try."

The two ran home, bursting through the door as soon as they reached their house. Their mother jumped in surprise and turned to them. "Oh, it's only you two," she said, her heart still beating more quickly than normal, "What were you doing out there? It's nearly sunset! I was beginning to get worried."

"Mom, Andrew and I had a battle!!! This guy in white clothes challenged Andrew, and I joined in, and we beat him!!!" Andrea exclaimed excitedly. Their mother raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Really?!?" she said in surprise, but her expression turned angry. "You should have had a responsible adult there. You were battling a complete stranger!!!" she yelled.

"Mom, we knew who he was," Andrew said, taken aback by his mother's angry expression, "His name was Eusine." "But he told you that, didn't he? You didn't know who he was before you were challenged, right?" she demanded. "Aren't you even proud of us?" Andrea asked, forgetting their plan about the Whirl Islands.

"Well, not many nine year olds can beat a professional trainer in their first battle. I am proud of you, so no punishment," she said in a softer tone.

Her nose wrinkled. "What is that disgusting smell?" she inquired of her children. Andrew looked at Cubone, and realized its bone was still covered in mold. "Oh, it's Cubone," he said laughing, "Don't worry, we'll wash his bone." He and Cubone walked up the stairs.

"Good night, Andrea," her mother said, hugging her, "This is the last time I see you as a nine year old," she said, smiling. Andrea smiled. "Night, Mom," she said dashing up the stairs. Cubone's cry rang out upstairs. "Andrea!!!!" Andrew called. She ran into the bathroom, seeing Andrew forcing Cubone into the bathtub. "Can you hold him for me?" he asked, restraining his struggling Cubone.

She laughed, and said, "You do realize only its bone needs washing?" "Yeah, but, as long as the water's there, why not wash Cubone too?" he replied. "Oh, all right," she said, joining him next to the tub. Eventually, they calmed Cubone down, but it still wasn't enjoying its bath. Its eyes had a bored look as the two scrubbed it's skull. "There, Cubone, you're clean now. You can get out, now," Andrew announced. Cubone wasted no time in escaping the soapy water and hurrying to its bed.

"I'm not even going to try bathing mine," Andrea said wearily, still quite wet from Cubone's frenzied thrashing. Both Cubones lay fast asleep in their makeshift beds. "Ten tomorrow," Andrea remarked. "Yeah, then we can battle legally," Andrew muttered sleepily. He lay in bed, staring at the ceiling, and then something occured to him. "Hey, Andrea, I didn't know your Cubone could use Dig," he said.

"Oh, right. Remember what Cubone tripped over? It turned out to be a TM. It was TM28, Dig, so I figured I could teach it to Cubone," she answered. "Oh, okay," Andrew replied, "And I thought it was just so scared of Electrode that it learned it while trying to escape," he said in a voice that indicated he was about to fall asleep. Andrea laughed quietly, and fell fast asleep.



"MISSSS! DRE-" Andrew threw his pillow at the clock. Andrea just pushed the Off button on hers.

"We're ten!" they exclaimed at the same time. They marched downstairs, and chorused to their mother, "Happy Birthday to us! Happy Birthday to us! Happy Birthday to u-us.......Happy Birthday to us!".

Their mother smiled. "Yes, you're both officially Trainers now. So, I've bought you some gifts." She reached into a large, brown bag on the side of her chair. "Andrew, I bought you a PokéGear. It is extremely useful, and all trainers need them. It comes with an instruction menu, which I thought you'd enjoy. I also bought you an Itemfinder. It should come in handy, as there are probably tons of old items buried in the beach."

Andrew loved them. He rushed up to his mom and screamed "Oh, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!". Andrew (and Andrea, for that matter) loved to read, although their reputations as troublemakers made this less obvious. He rushed up to his room to begin reading.

Andrea was boucing on the tips of her feet by now. "And, for you, dear daughter, I bought a Good Rod. There are is so much water here, you should find many Poke'mon by fishing," she said. Andrea squealed with delight. She hugged her mother tightly and carressed her new Rod. It was polished to perfection, the mahogany wood gleaming brightly in the light from the lightbulb above. A small, Psyduck-shaped lure was tied at the end of the string.

Andrea ran to the door, but her mother stopped her. "Wait Andrea, there's more," she said, smiling as Andrea beamed. "Andrew!!" she called. Andrew rushed downstairs, holding his PokéGear tightly. "What?" he asked curiously. "Presents," she replied happily. Andrew drew in a sharp intake of breath.

"I've called Professor Elm, and he has agreed to send you both Poké Dexes. They'll arrive around dinnertime. And, one last thing. I went to the Mart, and bought each of you 5 Great Balls. Andrea can fish, and Cubone can Smash rocks. I'd expect you'll find some interesting Poke'mon while doing this. You have my permission to catch them," she said. Andrea and Andrew were speechless.

"Why?" Andrew asked. "I beg your pardon?" his mother asked, smile fading a little. "Why are you doing all of this for us? Becoming a Trainer is a big deal, but you spoil us. Not that I don't appreciate them," he hastily added, as his mother looked crestfallen, "I positively love them, it's just, it's an awful lot of gifts."

"Well, you two have always been portrayed as villians, so I thought this might improve your self-esteem," she replied. "OK," Andrew said, still not entirely convinced. With one last hug, they dashed out the door.

"Oops, we forgot about the Whirl Islands," Andrew said, and they walked back in. "Mom!" Andrea called. "What is it?" she asked, coming down the stairs, looking worried. "Well, yesterday, the Seer was impressed by our battle, and offered to try and lift our ban from leaving Cianwood City. She said we could go to the Whirl Islands if we wanted, but we need your permission," Andrea said, hoping against hope.

"Well, OK, but only if the Seer or a responsible adult accompanies you at ALL times," she said, "If you goof around there, you will not be allowed back, OK?" "Sure," they said, beaming. They walked out, skipping. "I can't believe our luck," Andrew said happily. They both walked happily to their hideout. Andrew let Cubone out of its Poke'ball. After last time, Andrew and Andrea had decided to keep their Cubones in their Poke'balls, as they would likely destroy the alarm clocks out of irritation. "Cubone, Rock Smash!" Andrew ordered. "Cuuu-bone!!" it replied.

Cubone charged at the wall and swung its bone. The rocks packed into the hole crumbled, revealing the entrance to the hideout. The twins and Cubone walked in and sat down in their makeshift chairs. "Cubone, c'mon out!" Andrea said. Cubone flew out and stretched its arms. It too collapsed into its chairs. "Do you think there are treasures buried here?" Andrea asked anxiously. "Could be," Andrew said, "How about I use the Itemfinder?". "Go for it," Andrea said, "Cubone can dig them up."

Andrew pulled out his neon blue Itemfinder and clicked on the On switch. The Itemfinder beeped in a low tone. Andrew walked to the left, and the beeping ceased. He returned to his original spot, and the beeping returned. He walked slowly to the right, and the beeping grew higher pitched and more frequent. He walked to the far corner and the Itemfinder beeped madly. He walked further to the left and it began vibrating as well. "I think there's an item buried here!!" he said excitedly.

"All right. Cubone, Dig!!!" Cubone swiped at the ground with its bone, and burrowed for a few feet until a small bottle popped up. The faded label read "Ma El ir". "I think it's a Max Elixir," Andrea said, jumping into the hole and picking up the bottle. "Cool," Andrew said. "Let's show it to Mom!!" Andrea exclaimed.

They ran back to their house, but Andrew stopped at the Medicine Man's house. "Andrea," he said slowly, "You only got one individual gift, right?" "Yeah," she said, uncomprehending. "And the Medicine Man has all sorts of valuable stuff, right?" "Yeah," she said, more excitedly, understanding. "How about we get you another present?" Andrew said sneakily. Andrea thought for a little. Eventually, she replied, "OK, let's do it!!".


They walked to the side of the Medicine Man's house. "Boost me up to the top," Andrew whispered. Andrea obliged, and Andrew climbed onto her shoulders. "OW!!!" she screamed as quietly as possible, "My head isn't removable, you know!!".

"OK, Cubone. Climb up," Andrew ordered. Both Cubones scampered up the two, Andrea's nearly falling off. "OK, my turn," Andrew said, heaving himself up to the roof. "Grab my hand, Andrea," he said. She grasped his hand, wet with sweat. He pulled her up, the veins in his neck bulging and his muscles tightening.

"Now what?" Andrea asked, wiping Andrew's sweat onto her green jeans. "We wait for him to leave," he responded. Andrea laid back after a while, staring up at the gloomy sky. "What do we do if it starts raining?" she asked. "We stay," he said, eyes on the door, waiting for the brass doorknob to turn. "Are you mad? I don't need a present that much!!" she declared, still whispering.

The Cubones grew bored of waiting, and began hitting each other gently on their skulls. "Don't do that, you two," Andrew warned, worried the sound would draw out the Medicine Man. If he saw them up there, they were doomed. Andrea fell asleep, but was shaken awake five minutes later. "Wh-" she began, but Andrew clamped a hand to her mouth. "He's leaving," he said very softly.

Andrea didn't dare speak as they watched the Medicine Man walk away towards the Pokémart. Andrea grabbed her Cubone, which startled it. It swung its bone, but Andrea grabbed it. "It's just me," she said, and Cubone calmed down. Andrew jumped off the red tiled roof, his Cubone doing the same. Andrea jumped, holding Cubone tightly. She landed, but stumbled and fell forward. The soft sand scraped against her face, not hurting her, but making her skin itch. She stood up, scratched her forehead, and ran inside.

Andrew was inside, next to the display case. Inside were many bright red Berries. Andrea spotted three Berry Juice bottles in the corner, which Andrew was staring at. In front of the shelf laid a blue Shuckle shell. It appeared vacant, but a deep snoring reverberated from within it.

Andrew turned his head slowly to his sister. He pointed at her and then at the floor she was standing on. Andrea interpretted this as an order to stay where she was. Andrew crept quietly to the refridgerator. He walked with great care, trying not to make the oak floorboards creak. He reached the fridge, and eased it open. Andrea and the two Cubones watched as he took a bottle of Moomoo Milk out. He pushed the door closed at a snail's pace. He pulled it off without making a sound. He crept to the shelf and took off a bottle of Juice. He took a cup from the table, an unusually large cup decorated with many Krabbies. He walked outside, his sister and the Cubones following.

"What're you doing?" she asked. "I'm replacing the Juice with Milk. He'll notice if one of the bottles is missing," he said sagely. He ran to the ocean and washed out the now empty Milk bottle. He poured the Juice into the bottle, and poured the Milk in the cup into the Juice Bottle. "C'mon," he said, his voice dropping back to a whisper. He opened the door slowly, and walked inside. Andrea followed, holding her Cubone. Andrew's Cubone followed her in, looking rather jealously at its twin.

Andrew was slowly but steadily creeping back to the shelf to put the bottle back. He put it back, but suddenly, a leg popped out of the blue shell. The snoring had ceased, and the Shuckle was awake. Its head popped out, eyes half closed from sleep. Its beady eyes popped open as it saw its uninvited houseguests. "No, Shuckle, it's us!! Your old friends Andrew and Andrea. Why don't you go back to sleep?" he said, his voice shaking.

It stared at them, and then yelled at the top of its voice, "SHUCKLE!!!! SHUCKLE!!". "RUN!!!" Andrew yelled at Andrea, abandoning all attempts to keep his voice down. They rushed at the door, but the doorknob turned and opened, the Medicine Man walked in. He sneered as he looked down at the twins, frozen in place. "Well, now, what do we have here?" he said, softly and unpleasantly. Andrea knew instantly all hopes off going to the Whirl Islands had vanished. The Medicine Man walked them home, slowly, as though to prolong their pain. When he reached their house, he knockly sharply on the door.


Chapter 1 is done. I'll post Chapter 2 on Page 2 of this thread. Special Credit to fhqwhgads, for the support of my first ever fic!!!!! Thanks, pal!!!!!!
 
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fhqwhgads

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Hmm.... Same as the sneak peek you gave me. But if I didn't see that before i'd give it 10/10 because Cubone is not used alot. Troublemakers, avoiding law, I like it. Hope it has description. If so you have a permanent reader. Don't forget our deal.
 
Don't worry, fhqwhgads, I've just edited it to fit credit, and I will stick to my deal. Cubone will be used a lot, they are MAJOR characters, and will be heard of a lot. Remember, this was only the prologue!!! BTW, there were a few minor changes to this prologue from the one I gave you.
 

Breezy

Well-Known Member
Hmm . . . Well . . .

Plotwise, I think its pretty, I've haven't really read anything like this. Sure, there's the kids searching for their fathers but not without like a Pokémon their dad gave them.

Paragraphing/spacing could use some work. A new line should start when a different character is speaking. Same thing goes with the subject changes and doesn't really fit in with the last paragraph. Saves readers the hassle of highlighting exactly where they and such if you catch my drift . . .

Spelling/grammar were fine as well.

What I'm really concerned about is how you wrote this chapter. It was more like a somewhat detailed summary. Like it gives you the main points and just jumps from topic to topic. In other words, IMO, its like you rushed pretty much. Slow it down and detail it a bit k? ^^

Speaking of which, detail could use some work.

But overall, I think its a pretty good start.

LaTeR dAyZ!
 
Uh, Breezy, I am glad you took the time to read this and post about it, I would like to point out that IT IS A PROLOGUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS A SHORT PREVIEW OF WHAT I PLAN TO WRITE!!!!!! Sorry, but it seemed as though you thought this was the first chapter. I'll write that chapter after I get a few more reviews.
EDIT: Yay, Johto Champion!!!!! Appropriate for the PROLOGUE of my fic, no? It'll be a shame to start on Hoenn in the beginning of my Johto fic.....
 
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Guvut

Guest
The idea looks interesting, but the paragraphing and spacing could use some work. Hope this fic turns out well, you have my regards!
 
Well, I guess I could have spaced the prologue a bit more. That never was my strong point. Well, I think I have enough reviews to start writing Chapter one: An unorthodox Birthday.
Here's a teaser of some important events in this chapter.
Andrea and Andrew turn ten.
We discover a secret hangout where the twins relax and think up new tricks.
Cubone 2 sees a Suicune.
A familiar character challenges the Twins to their first ever Poke'mon Battle.
The twins report this to their mother, and she tells them ten IS the official age a Trainer becomes a Trainer.
The twins steal the Berry Juice, but are caught.
The twins discover their father's story.
The twins sneak out at night.
They make it past security measures and discover a horrible problem.
That's all for Chapter One, expect to see a new Poke'mon in their possesion in Chapter Two: Twin Stowaways!! I can't write this now(school-_-), but I'll do it when I get home.
 
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Tritan-Just

Guest
Yay! Cubone! I like Cubones too! Twins! Hm....Never heard a dat! I like it! You got a fic. follower! Bye!
 
Wow, you all are so eager. I hope I don't mess up. Expect the first chapter in the next few hours. I will begin now, but might(not likely, though) get interrupted, and if I do, I'll just post what I've written.
 

fhqwhgads

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WOW!! The first chapter is pretty good. 9/10. It's kinda boring(like most first chapters are) but it's the first chapter. And if this is the first ne then it'll be awesome.
 
Well, remember, I'm doing it little by little. I don't want it to delete itslef again. It is an exciting chapter, that was only the first part. Expect a battle in the next few subsections of the chapter and a very familiar legendary.
 

fhqwhgads

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Who, Suicune? Because you said that already. Can't wait.
BTW Sheer Cold, you can double post on your own fic if you need to update.
 
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I've just updated(twice), so you can see for yourself. I've twisted the story in Crystal to fit mine.
 

fhqwhgads

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Cool fraction. The battle will be awesome.
BTW, this place seems deserted except for you and me Sheer Cold, huh?
 
:( yeah, I've noticed.....I did get two different people to reply, though. And, now that I've started the story, maybe more people will come. BTW, in case you want to know, Eusine's Poke'mon are Drowzee, Electrode and Haunter, which are, as far as I remember, the same as in the game. Drowzee's battle will be somewhat exciting, Electrode's not as much, but I'll bet a lot you'll never guess how the battle with Haunter turns out. The Cubones know only Normal and Ground Attacks, neither of which affect Haunter. How will they prevail, or will they even prevail? Keep visiting and find out.
 
As said, those are the only attacks it knows. I don't bend reality like that. I'll just tell you Andrew's Cubone's Rock Smash plays a major part in this. And, the nothing that Andrea's tripped over is revealed.
 
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