The Trainer Legacy (PG-13)

[Pete the Unstoppable]

Mild Violence and Disturbing Scenes, I am not able to use the spell checker, itis because I have to download it. I am sorry. It also has mild language. By the way Shawn is supposed to use improper grammer because he is a gangster. Not much but some.

Two Chapters in the Index has been Complete but here are the titles for all of the chapters

Chapter 1:The Flaming Start, Rivals Meet
Chapter 2:The Viridian Forest Part 1
Chapter 3:Forest Fire Part 2
Chapter 4:Battle for the Boulder Badge
Chapter 5:Fossils, STOLEN!
Chapter 6:Rematch with Shawn
Chapter 7:The Hike in Mt. Moon Part 1
Chapter 8:Battle for 5 Fossils Part 2
Chapter 9 Disadvantages, Spenser Vs. Misty
Chapter 10okemaniac Bill at the Cape
Chapter 11 Diglett's Cave In
Chapter 12:The Lightning American Vs. Spenser
Chapter 13:Snorlax, MOVE!
Chapter 14 Detour Through the Darkness of Rock Tunnel
Chapter 15:Team Rocket Strikes at Pokemon Tower
Chapter 16:Spenser's Lucky Day, Another Snorlax!
Chapter 17:Elegant Battle at Celadon Gym
Chapter 18:A Battle with a Psychic in Saffron
Chapter 19:Team Rocket Returns at Silph Co.
Chapter 20 Down Cycling Road
Chapter 21:The Safari Zone
Chapter 22:Spenser Collides with the Ninja Master
Chapter 23:Across the Sea to Cinnabar
Chapter 24:Explore Pokemon Mansion while the Fossils are Being Ressurected Part 1
Chapter 25okemon Mansion Expierement Malfuntion, Result:MISSINGNO! Part 2
Chapter 26:Flames Vs. Flames at Cinnabar, Match for the Volcano Badge Part 3
Chapter 27:Viridian Gym, Giovanni's Hideout? Part 1
Chapter 28:Clash in the Titans:Spenser Vs. Giovanni, Leader of Team Rocket Part 2
Chapter 29:Training in Victory Road
Chapter 30okemon League Tournament Round 1 Part 1
Chapter 31okemon League Tournament Round 2 Part 2
Chapter 32okemon League Tournament Round 3 Part 3
Chapter 33okemon League Tournament Round 4 Part 4
Chapter 34okemon League Tournament Quarter-Finals Part 5
Chapter 35okemon League Tournament Semi-Finals Part 6
Chapter 36:SHOWDOWN!:Spenser Clashes with Shawn Part 1
Chapter 37:SHOWDOWN!:Spenser Clashes with Shawn Part 2
Chapter 38:SHOWDOWN!:Spenser Clashes with Shawn Part 3
Chapter 39:SHOWDOWN!:Spenser Clashes with Shawn Part 4
Chapter 40:SHOWDOWN!:Spenser Clashes with Shawn Part 5
Chapter 41:The Elite Four Challenge, Lorelei Part 1
Chapter 42:The Elite Four Challenge, Lorelei Part 2
Chapter 43:The Elite Four Challenge, Lorelei Part 3
Chapter 44:The Elite Four Challenge, Bruno Part 1
Chapter 45:The Elite Four Challenge, Bruno Part 2
Chapter 46:The Elite Four Challenge, Bruno Part 3
Chapter 47:The Elite Four Challenge, Agatha Part 1
Chapter 48:The Elite Four Challenge, Agatha Part 2
Chapter 49:The Elite Four Challenge, Agatha Part 3
Chapter 50:The Elite Four Challenge, Lance, Clash for the Championship Part 1
Chapter 51:The Elite Four Challenge, Lance, Clash for the Championship Part 2
Chapter 52:The Elite Four Challenge, Lance, Clash for the Championship Part 3
Chapter 53:The Elite Four Challenge, Lance, Clash for the Championship Part 4
Chapter 54:The Elite Four Challenge, Lance, Clash for the Championship Part 5
Chapter 55:The Elite Four Challenge, Lance, Clash for the Championship Part 6
Chapter 56:The Elite Four Challenge, Lance, Clash for the Championship Part 7
Chapter 57:The Rainbow Pass Acess to One, Two, Three, Four, Five, Six and Seven Islands
Chapter 58:One Island, Team Rocket Reforms on Mt. Ember? Part 1
Chapter 59:One Island, Inside the Mountain Part 2
Chapter 60:Two Island, The Ultimate Attack
Chapter 61:Three Island, a Lost Girl and a Hypno
Chapter 62:Four Island, Team Rocket Clashes with Lorelei in Icefall Cave Part
1
Chapter 63:Four Island, Team Rocket Clashes with Lorelei in Icefall Cave Part 2
Chapter 64:Four Island, Team Rocket Clashes with Spenser in Icefall Cave Part 3
Chapter 65:Five Island, Team Rocket's Hideout, 1 Password Short
Chapter 66:Six Island, the Dotted Hole
Chapter 67:Team Rocket's Hideout Part 1
Chapter 68:Team Rocket's Hideout, Part 2
Chapter 69:Rematch with Giovanni Part 1
Chapter 70:Rematch with Giovanni Part 2
Chapter 71:Rematch with Giovanni Part 3
Chapter 72:The Divine Pokemon, Suicune
Chapter 73:Let's Finish this Once and for ALL! Part 1
Chapter 74:Let's Finish this Once and for ALL! Part 2
Chapter 75:Let's Finish this Once and for ALL! Part 3
Chapter 76:Let's Finish this Once and for ALL! Part 4
Chapter 77:Let's Finish this Once and for ALL! Part 5
Chapter 78:Spenser's Welcome Back Home Party
Chapter 79:Tanoby Ruins
Chapter 80:Rematch with Lance Part 1
Chapter 81:Rematch with Lance Part 2
Chapter 82:Rematch with Lance Part 3
Chapter 83:Rematch with Lance Part 4
Chapter 84:Rematch with Lance Part 5
Chapter 85:Rematch with Lance Part 6
Chapter 86:Rematch with Lance Part 7
Chapter 87:Rematch with Lance Part 8
Chapter 88:Rematch with Lance Part 9
Chapter 89:Rematch with Lance Part 10
Chapter 90:One Last Good-Bye...

Chapter 1:The Flaming Start, Rivals Meet

Spenser, a 13 year-old boy in a suit with black pants, black pants, black shoes, white shirt, white skin, brown hair blue eyes and a blue tie woke up. He is running out the door and to Prof. Oak's Lab. When Spenser entered the lab he saw Prof. Oak; an elderly man with black shoes, red shirt, white lab coat, and grey hair. "Not to be offensive or anything Pokemon Professor, but I was expecting you to be a little bit younger." said Spenser.

"None taken. There are three Pokeballs on that desk choose one. The Pokemon inside are, Bulbasaur the ball to the left, the grass and poison type. Charmander, the ball to the right, the fire type. And Squirtle, the ball in the middle the water type. You may choose one of those Pokemon for your Pokemon Journey." said Prof. Oak pointing to the balls on the desk with a red top and white bottom.

Spenser picked up all 3 pokeballs and sent all 3 Pokemon out to see which on he liked the best. Bulbasaur was snoozing. Squirtle was looking like what on earth. But Charmander was very energetic. The Bulbasar was a big green mouse like creature with a bulb on it's back. Charmander is an orange lizard with a flame on it's tail. And Squirtle is a blue turtle with an orange shell.

Spenser put Squirtle and Bulbasaur back in their Pokeballs and placed them back on the desk. Spenser returned Charmander to it's Pokeball still holding the ball in his hand. "May I have the Charmander?" asked Spenser looking at Prof. Oak.

Prof. Oak nodded, "Why of course. Now do you wish to give that Charmander a nickname?" asked Prof. Oak.

"No thanks. I like the name Charmander just fine and whatever the names of it maybe whenever it evolves." responded Spenser.

Another person walked in the lab. The person wore a black leather jacket, sunglasses, black jeans a cap with holes in it that said Nike and he had black skin. "Yo, my name is Shawn! I came here to get myself a Pokemon and get this ride goin' so I can explore other Ghettos home g!" hollared the person.

"Right...Um, there are to Pokemon left the one on the left it Bulba-" Prof. Oak was cut off.

"I already know dat, I go choose da' Pokemon in da middle right dare!" said Shawn using a bunch of improper grammer picking up the Pokeball that contain Squirtle.

"This is not a ghetto, I do not like your improper grammer and please, talk like a normal person!" complained Spenser.

"Forget you! I wanna get this ride goin' startin' wit me battlin' you!" said Shawn.

"Alright go Charmander!" shouted Spenser sending out his Charmander.

"Yo, homey, go Pimped Out Turtle! He gonna mess you up twenty different ways punk!" shouted Shwaun sending out his Squirtle.

"Charmander use Scratch!" ordered Spenser; Charmander ran quickly but when Charmander tried to Scratch Squirtle, it hid inside it's shell.

"Pimped Out Turtle, Tackle that weakling!" demanded Shawn.

The Pokemon vicously went at it, Charmander would Scratch, but Squritle would hide inside the shell. Squirtle would then Tackle Charmander with all it's might. Charmander was weakened. "Charmander, when it hides inside the shell, put your hand inside its head hole and Scratch!" Spenser told Charmander the strategy.

Charmander ran for Squirtle and as always Shwaun ordered Squirtle to hide inside the shell, but that made no difference. Charmander Scratched Squirtle's head from inside the shell by putting it's hand inside the shell. Shawn relized that it was useless, "Pimped Out Turtle, go all out, Tackle the Charmander!" ordered Shawn.

Charmander already weakened was still going at Squirtle. Both of the Pokemon were getting severely injured. But, in the end Charmander did something that was thought to be impossible for a Charmander that has been never trained before, it used Flamethrower and knocked Squirtle out but nevertheless. Charmander used so much energy, that it too, fainted.

Both of the trainers returned their Pokemon back to their Pokeballs. "How Professor, how did my Charmander use Flamethrower?" asked Spenser.

It took less than a moment for Prof. Oak to figure out the answer to the question, "You see, I guess that the Charmander learned the move when it was born. You see, Pokemon can gain moves from it's father. I am assuming that is what happened with your Charmander." answered Prof. Oak.

Both of the Trainers used a machine in the lab that healed their Pokemon. They both left with a very evil nasty look to each other. They both walked into Route 1 but they each took their different ways.

 

[Saffire Persian]

I suppose Shwaun's parents must suffer from the same grammar deficiency, considering his name. Though you are not going out on an all out 'lets swear fest', I still have yet to believe you are talking this seriously, and happen to be trying to stray away from vulgarity because - oh I dunno - the 'Pimped out Turtle' comment is something no sane person would do, and is something no serious writer (Does anyone think a real comedy writer would really do that and have their character call their Pokemon that?) I think would do.

Your description could use a lot of work, and your Pokémon appear to be true-blue-fighting Pokébots. Ohh! And I think I see a future Gary-stu on his way., I'd steer clear of that.

I said I'd give you a civil review if you tried, and I have.. but I think you can use a bit more work in the writing department.

 

[Joe Vega #4]

Too fast, what kinda name is Shwaun, punctuation errors, blah.

YOUR WRITING ATTEMPTS ARE FUTILE, SO ACCEPT IT.

There. That's something you ought to notice.

 

[Kakiryu]

I think I gave up about halfway through the number of chapter listings...

I think everyone else has already told you this, but your "story" is nothing but a plain mumble jumble of text, I used to write like that when I was 5. No logic, no description, tastes like cardboard.

 

[Pete the Unstoppable]

I fixed Shawn's name, thanx for letting me know that was not how you spell Shawn. Oh and what is a Gary Stu, is that the same thing as a Mary Sue? This has a minor bit of gore in this chapter.

Chapter 2:The Viridian Forest Part 1

"Charmander, use Scratch!" ordered Spenser.

Charmander furiously scratched the Pidgey knocking it out a Pidgey is a bird Pokemon with red and white wings. Spenser used his Pokeball to return Charmander to his Pokeball. Spenser saw a Pokemon run right by him with what looked like a purple cloud coming out from the back of it's head. The Pokemon also had white rhombuses over it's body and it was blue. There was a trail of blood following it. Spenser was shocked.

A tall man in green with a bullet proof vest with a rifle walked ran following the path of blood. Spenser gave him an evil look. "That evil demon!!! Charmander, use flamethrower on him!" ordered Spenser sending out his Charmander.

Charmander set the person on fire and he ran back with his rifle and tried to shoot the Charmander but the rifle was out of ammo. "Why the heck did you do that?!" yelled the hunter.

"You attacked that Pokemon, you dirty, little minon of evil! You demon!!! It will never be able to live. Why?! Because of your selfish wants!" cried Spenser.

"You don't know how much I can sell for a Suicune, do you?!" yelled the hunter.

"That...That...That was a Suicune?! It's true then! Pokemon and humans will never be able to live together! And it is because of selfish dirty people like you!" sobbed Spenser on his knees.

The hunter snapped a picture. "Heh, my friends are gonna love what I got! I teenager, with...Tears!" laughed the hunter.


A bunch of officers came to see the man who shot Suicune. Thr police officers sent out their Growlithes. The hunter ran but he was scorched and killed. Spenser still sobbing, "What, what will happen to Suicune?" asked Spenser.

The police officers just walked away also angry at that hunter. Spenser got up and walked pass Viridian City and into Viridian forest. He challenged a trainer. "Go, Charmander!" said Spenser sending out his Charmander there will still tears he was trying to hold in and still tears on his face.

The trainer didn't hesistate, "Go Beedrill, Fury Attack!" ordered the trainer who was a bug catcher, the Beedrill was 3 foot bee and has stingers for hands, the trainer wore a white t-shirt and white shorts and was bald, and his name was Leo.

Charmander fought back on it's own using Flamethrower knocking the Beedril out but also setting one tree on fire. That tree caused more trees to be set on fire. It was a forest fire everyone was able to evacuate except Spenser and his Charmander.

Spenser looked at the ground and looked at a trail of blood. "No! Suicune, I'll save you!" sobbed Spenser looking at the ground as he got on his knees.

 

[Yami Ryu]

A bunch of officers came to see the man who shot Suicune. Thr police officers sent out their Growlithes. The hunter ran but he was scorched and killed. Spenser still sobbing, "What, what will happen to Suicune?" asked Spenser.

If the guy shot Suicune, wtf prevented him from SHOOTING the Police, their pokemon, or anyone else? And how was he scorched and killed. And what do you mean by having the character ask such a stupid question? If Suicune was shot, and in critical or where he/she it was still alive, he should have been all WE NEED A NURSE. MEDIC. SOMETHING.

The police officers just walked away also angry at that hunter. Spenser got up and walked pass Viridian City and into Viridian forest. He challenged a trainer. "Go, Charmander!" said Spenser sending out his Charmander there will still tears he was trying to hold in and still tears on his face.

So the police left the scene of the crime, a dead body and a shot Suicune, without taking a report, without doing anything? And what does Spenser do? Get up, go into Viridian Forest and CHALLENGE A TRAINER TO A FIGHT.

Not only is he an emo cry baby, but he forgets about what he was badly emo cry babying about.

The trainer didn't hesistate, "Go Beedrill, Fury Attack!" ordered the trainer who was a bug catcher.

Bug Catcher, is not a name. Bug Catcher, does not describe what the trainer looks like. What is Beedrill? Is it a floating sack of stones that hurls them at stupid people?

Charmander fought back on it's own using Flamethrower knocking the Beedril out but also setting one tree on fire. That tree caused more trees to be set on fire. It was a forest fire everyone was able to evacuate except Spenser and his Charmander.

OH WOW. Not only is he Emo, but he's a Pyromaniac too! And with such poor description of the battle, and a bad attempt at drama, you set a whole smurfing forest on fire, killing all the pokemon in there, except for the humans and those that can get away. And what about the humans that can't? Oh, plot hole them away and leave Spenser and his Charmander there because they are too stupid to flee, evidently. Even though they had just enough brains together to cause a rampaging forest fire.

Spenser looked at the ground and looked at a trail of blood. "No! Suicune, I'll save you!" sobbed Spenser looking at the ground as he got on his knees.

Wait, he's stuck in a burning forest. A certain death trap, and he's worrying over a dead Suicune? And not his own life?

Not only do you be bop around all over the place for plot, your characters are so shockingly shallow, under developed, and poorly made, that they can't even qualify as a Gary Stu, because atleast a Gary Stu has some brains in their makings when those sorts of authors make them.

All this has is bad plot, bad characters, worse description and nothing good going for it.

I bet you didn't even read the Advice for Aspiring Authors sticky either.

 

[Pete the Unstoppable]

I did read aspiring authors, and sorry, I was a bit lazy, I'll go back and edit, the guy was also out of ammo, remember when he tried to shoot Charmander.

 

[Kakiryu]

Seriously, not to be rude, but are you retarded? Because you've ignored every single piece of advice people gave you.
If you're not retarded, the point is not trying to explain to people what actually happens, it's improving yourself:
Shallow characters > Make them more interesting, make them HAVE A DAMN PLAUSIBLE PERSONALITY
Jumbled plot > PLAN YOUR STORY, I mean seriously, PLAN IT BEFORE YOU WRITE IT

How old are you anyways?

 

[Pete the Unstoppable]

I do plan before I right. I am not retarded. I just get so excited whenever I right fics I leave out important details. What is wrong with the people anyway. Well, I tell you something, I am gonna make this a flash cartoon, each chapter will be an episode and I tell you, you would love it.

 

[Dilasc]

Mild Violence and Disturbing Scenes, I am not able to use the spell checker, itis because I have to download it. I am sorry.

Why don't you write this up in a word processor instead of the reply box? Doing so will not only waste your time writing in this shoddy window, but the ability to save your work means you can take breaks, and return to work at a LATER time if need be. Does that sound like a good idea to you?

 

[Joe Vega #4]

You read the sticky? Shame, you haven't learned anything at all from it. You get so excited when you write a fic you leave out important details? Pfft. My theory is that you cut to the chase everywhere. If this was meant to entertain, sorry, but throwing in random gore & crap doesn't make you a great author. And another thing. Exactly HOW is it I saw about three pointless fics from you today, where one was slayed by the powuh of the ancient locking spell?


I speak for all when I say I can't tolerate you anymore. Right fellas? *Glances at everyone else*

 

[indigestible_wad]

Agreed with everybody else. Honestly, why are you so exited to post something up that you know will at the most will get a half-assed review on it. You do know that the more you hurry, the more you mes up, which means a worse chapter, which means more people hating your work. So basically, you enjoy having bad reviews and getting flamed. Wow, now there's a case of ill-mentality. In fact i don't really have a word for how blatantly stupid that is.

Your stories are bad. End of story. You're even worse than Tavis_and_Chelsea.