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The White Knight [rated R]

Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by Lulu_used_SunnyDay, Jun 22, 2012.

  1. Lulu_used_SunnyDay

    Lulu_used_SunnyDay Petal Blizzard

    [R rating approved by Dragonfree]

    Revamped version of the chapter I previously posted.
    The R rating is for future violence scenes that may get a little graphic.

    This is the first thing I wrote in quite a long time, so please don't be afraid to be cruel with your reviews 'cause I have to get back in shape XD


    The White Knight

    Chapter 1

    It was a grey, hot evening when they last played together. A pearl-coated sky that would disguise that peaceful summer night for a winter morning, hiding the sun’s invisible yet warming rays, stretched above their heads, limitless, boundless, as to make them feel even more tiny and insignificant in thet vast, cruel world they were forced to live in.

    Crosto was bleeding pretty badly. Even though the small Shelmet was too proud to let his shell open for his friend to see him covered in red, it was all too obvious the young Rufflets had left a heavy mark on him. So Coil screamed. He cried out for help, even knowing how useless it would be, how miserably weak was his voice in his thin and underdeveloped throat, and how fast his playmate was losing strength. But he didn’t stop. He didn’t even try to search around, to let his slow, clumsy legs consume his last bits of energy to take him for a few, useless steps further into that rotten wasteland.

    He just let his breath come out into screechy, desperate sounds, guided more by the impelling need to let a small imitation of the growing pain in his heart explode out of him than a conscious attempt to save his beloved friend, to save them both.
    Until the dying Shelmet whispered something beside him. Then, the Karrablast’s desperate cries suddenly stopped, as he dropped on his tiny knees to meet Crosto’s eyes.

    “C-Crosto…” He began, but the Shelmet interrupted him.

    “Coil……. I’m sorry” Crosto said softly. His friend was even more alarmed to hear him so faintly. He looked like he could pass away at any moment.

    “Hang on!” He panted “Just…! Please don’t give up! I’m sure somebody will have to come around soon..”

    “It’s allright, Coil.”

    “You mean you can walk?”

    “No, I just….” Coil didn’t want to let him continue. This wasn’t the end, it couldn’t be.

    “Don’t do this to me, Crosto, please! Stay with me!” He yelled. But his friend continued.

    “I am not sad, Coil, believe me. But I need…”

    “Water! Of course! There must be…”

    “No, Coil, listen” He insisted ”I…need you to…”

    “Don’t say it!” The Karrablast didn’t know how loud he was now, and he didn’t care. He just wanted his friend to stop talking, to save his energy for their trip home, to keep him from saying out loud what he feared would happen. But it was no use. As he watched Crosto open his tiny mouth to speak once again, warm tears slowly started to flow from his eyes.

    “When I’m gone, h-hurry up and…and…………….…ooooh…..”

    “You’re not gonna die, Crosto!” He insisted, though not believing in what he just said anymore.

    "Take it, Coil. Take…………..my armor…."

    The Karrablast started screaming so loud he never heard what else his friend had said before closing his eyes forever. And he would regret it for the rest of his life. But at the same time he knew he couldn’t have helped it. The sudden silence that devoured the land as Crosto’s lifetime expired, as gently and swiftly as a small breeze moving the tall grass around him, was too much to handle.

    He even remembered wishing, before finally deciding to obey his friend’s dying wish, that one of those damned eagles would see the shining occasion for a meal he was offering and let him end his pitiful suffering on the spot. But, as his father often liked to repeat, he was born to be a warrior. A fighter. A pokemon that many would one day look up to. And so, as if to obey the silent bond that destiny decided to forge with him, he pulled Crosto’s corpse out of its iron-hard enclosure, clumsily wore it and started trudging towards the hills, slowly making his way towards home…

    "Sir Shell……."

    The absence of response from his superior made the Bisharp even more nervous than he already was. He cleared his throat and forced himself to raise his voice

    "Sir! It is time!"


    The Escavalier already heard him the first time. He just didn’t want to open his eyes so soon, and let the light of a too early morning discourage him from what had to be done that day. He was also still busy clearing his mind of the remaining fragments of a dream. An old, unpleasant dream he hadn’t dreamt for a long time. The fact that it came back to visit his busy mind that very night surely wasn’t a good sign, and even though he wasn’t superstitious, he needed to hear the Bisharp’s voice just another time to get rid of the bad feeling the thought was giving him.

    In fact, he secretly enjoyed the way the rookies were usually intimidated by him. Oh, he did remember the time when he was just like the young soldier that was sent to wake him up: young, inexperienced and in awe for everything the training fields had to offer, but also scared out of his mind every time he had to deal with a high rank veteran, whether it was in or outside the battle tournaments. It just gave him that sense of accomplishment that reminded him every day of the progress he had made over his career and proved, once again, that a new circle of life was completed.

    So as he stepped out of his tent he smiled friendlily to the youngster.

    "I’m awake. Awake and ready for it all. Are you, Samler?"
    He added, turning serious.

    "Y-yes, Sir!"

    Shell smiled again. He didn’t fail to notice Sam’s hesitation, but at least he tried to pull a strong face.

    They steadily moved towards the core of the camp. Numerous other pokemon were up early as well, and one of them in particular was already waiting for them on the observation cliff. Captain Babalork hastily offered a formal greeting and then proceeded to recap the main points of the offensive plan. Shell was only half listening to the Zoroark. His gaze started to wonder around the large valley that extended beneath their high position, then back at the unorganized mass of tents that circled around the grassy training area, enclosed in an ring of tall white rocks. He looked back at the mountains, as far as they’ve always been, never caring about their struggles for survival, never ceasing to shine of their beauty in the faint light of the morning sun.
    The Escavalier sighed. It was going to be a long day indeed.
    Last edited: Jun 22, 2012
  2. Lulu_used_SunnyDay

    Lulu_used_SunnyDay Petal Blizzard

    And here is chapter 2.
    As usual, tell me what you people think....Enjoy :)

    Chapter 2

    "….And this is why we have decided to withhold our final decision before hearing you out, Sir" Babalork concluded, crossing his arms on his thin chest and fixing his shiny blue eyes on Shell’s.

    The Escavalier felt his stomach give a lurch, and suddenly regretted his lack of attention for the Zoroark’s speech. The sense of unease grew stronger as a few more moments passed by before he could give any answer, during which Shell remembered all too well the role the Captain played in the reunion that discussed about the Escavalier’s promotion to the next degree, as leader of the 4th section of the offensive troop.

    Babalork had stood in his way in every possible manner, obstructing his promotion with every single excuse for an argument he could think of. The Escavalier was, at first, honestly surprised, as the two warriors shared similar wounds that left the same kind of unpleasant marks in their mental lucidity. He initially figured they were likely going to help and sustain each other during the campaign, but instead their relationship started to turn into something more similar to a harsh rivalry.
    Babalork was, Shell realized after a while, the classic unfortunate soldier that fate has been cruel with, and who made it his life’s goal to make sure nobody in his same condition would ever get any more than he did. He envied him, and ever since Shell’s long desired promotion, never missed an occasion to embarrass him in front of the other commanders, shamelessly exposing his own flaws in his colleague.

    Many had thankfully seen through him and learned not to pay too much attention to the Zoroark’s nasty comments, but others couldn’t help noticing the truth in Babalork’s words and began to be more wary of the new commander’s mistakes. This had made the Escavalier angry beyond telling. And even now, seeing the Zoroark’s thin lips subtly bending in a mocking smile for their prolonged silence, a sudden heat started to boil in his throat as his anger grew stronger. He was not going to let him win this.

    He did get distracted, but he picked up enough information from the Zoroark’s speech to be able to put together an answer that could satisfy him, or that at least wouldn’t sound too out of place.

    “I don’t think that we could benefit from any more delays. The troops already are quite discouraged, and I heard from the suppliers we are almost out of food. Postponing the attack for just another couple of days will require another round of work for the scouts, which is likely going to reveal our position. And we surely don’t want that to happen, don’t we?”

    The Escavalier relaxed a bit seeing Babalork’s smile fading. But he didn’t realize the black fox wasn’t satisfied until he spoke again.

    “So the message from the Mandibuzz Queen doesn’t concern you at all, does it?” The Zoroark offered in a deep, controlled voice.

    His words hit the bug pokemon as heavily and as unexpectedly as a sucker punch. He felt slightly dizzy, as his mind was rushing to cope with that sudden new information. The Queen of the Mandibuzz had sent them a messenger? For what purpose? What was the message about? What in the world could the ruler of the desert zone of the south want from the Northen Military? He didn’t understand much of what Babalork had just said after all. The Escavalier was panicking. What was he supposed to answer the Captain, and in what way, other than directly asking him, could he know more about the whole question?

    “If I’m allowed to say what I think…”

    Shell suddenly snapped out of his confused reasoning and realized the youngster standing next to him just spoke. He quickly turned his head and looked at Samler, who almost seemed to be hiding behind him and regretting what he just said. The expression on Babalork’s face was so angry he looked like he wanted to burn the Bisharp to a crisp. The Escavalier immediately knew he had to stop the Captain from destroying the last rope the rookie offered him to escape his horrible situation.

    “Have you not been taught not to speak to your superiors without…”

    “It’s all right Babalork, let him have his say” Shell interrupted him.

    He knew his colleague wasn’t pleased, but he didn’t add anything else, and neither did the Escavalier. Instead, he met Samler’s intimidated eyes and silently begged him for help.

    “I think we should do something about it” The young Bisharp began, timidly. “I mean, we all know the Mandibuzz are quite a solitary tribe, and rarely seek for any contact with strangers that doesn’t involve them considering the ones they contact as prey…”

    He then hesitated, clearing his throat.

    “Well of course, the is the possibility it might all be a trap, but I really don’t see how the Southern Force might’ve corrupted them… The Mandibuzz are far too proud to obey anyone outside their clan. And if they’re trying to make a good meal out of us, well… They’re gonna have a nasty surprise if they think their strength can compete with ours. Unless they’re gonna call for help. But as I said, they’re way too proud to do that, and I can’t even think of anyone who’d want to have anything to do with…”

    Samler seemed to be confused for a few moments, but then he quickly shook his head and added “I-I mean, the chances are they won’t attack us, and even if they do, we can defend ourselves. There must be some other reason for the Queen wanting to have a word with us. She didn’t even let us know through her messenger….” He then paused to catch his breath.

    He seemed to be a little too agitated, even for a rookie who was alone with two of his superiors. Maybe, Shell thought, he just didn’t have the chance to speak much with anyone since he arrived.

    “There has to be something big behind it” He finally added. And, after a few moments of silence, quickly murmured “That’s all”.

    Babalork’s gaze had started to wonder somewhere over his comrades, as if he was in deep thinking. And Shell was experiencing some sort of a mixed feeling between relief for having a clearer picture of the situation and concern for the implications of it. He did however take a moment to smile gratefully at the young soldier, who responded with a happy light in his eyes and a slight blush around his cheeks, though almost completely hidden by his shining red helmet.

    “What you have said is very true, Samler” The Escavalier offered his young new ally “But the fact still stands that time is our enemy”
    He then paused, quickly looked around and sighed “ What do you think about it, Captain?”

    “I think” The Zoroark slowly began, as if still thinking about what to say next “ That we’d better discuss about this with the council”

    Viergan let out a small sigh of relief as she started to hear the voices of her siblings raising from the high, whitish nests she was heading towards, flying as fast as she could without risking to lose any of her feathers.

    “I’m home…finally” she said to herself, as if to cancel completely the last traces of the chilly wind that had pierced her frail, bare neck and the unfamiliar odors that the mountains had left on her plumage.

    That, she thought, was the only reason she sometimes hated to be a messenger. She was quite a good fighter and so unlike most of her working partners, she didn’t fear the possibility of being attacked during the mission by some stray pack of Houndooms or by an ungrateful receiver. But she did hate having to cope with the different food she had to eat when in mission in other lands, and with any weather that was colder than what she was used to - and basically any place was colder than a desert.
    But now that her home was in sight, she just couldn’t wait to rest on her favorite perch and polish her wings…

    “No” she suddenly snapped at herself “Duties first”

    She was working for no other than the Queen, after all. And as her subordinate she first had to report the Northern Army’s answer. She couldn’t deny she was curious about it herself, after all. She did expect something more than a simple “We’ll think about it” kind of an answer. What was that supposed to mean anyway? That they would calmly consider if the offer of Her Majesty herself, who graced them with a formal invitation to her very Royal Nest, would be worth their precious time? How arrogant of them! Was their opinion of the Bonecollectors Tribe that low?

    Well, she thought, it probably is. The old times where the Mandibuzz were considered the masters of the deserts were becoming more far and less remembered every decade, and most of the younger vultures often migrated elsewhere as soon as they evolved. The ancient pride and sense of community that once united them all under the same wing was lost long ago. Everyone seemed to have become more and more egocentric and less willing to work to keep their cohesion, even within their own families. And it didn’t even seem like a phenomenon that was exclusive of the Mandibuzz. The war that was about to start between the Northern and the Southern lands was living proof of that. It also clearly showed the truth in what Viergan always thought about that whole new mentality: it could only lead to pain and destruction.

    The Mandibuzz shook her head as she swiftly changed direction to the Queen’s nest and landed softly on the layer of smaller bones that covered the sand around the outer area of the construction. The guards standing around the central ring let her proceed further into the bigger pieces of bone of the core, as one of them loudly announced her presence to their chief.

    “Come on in!” The Queen answered excitedly, puffing herself up as her messenger stopped in front of her.

    Viergan slightly opened her wings and bent her pink knees in a small bow. As she referred the message, she saw the Queen’s expression shift from anxious to tiredly worried.

    “Well done, Viergan. You may rest now if you wish to” She formally offered with a flat voice. But, as her worker was turning around to go home, she added “I can tell you, if they should not accept, I’ll have to deal with this all by myself…” Viergan curiously turned her head back at her Queen, and barely managed to see, between the Mandibuzz’s claws, the rotting corpse of a Shelmet without his armor attached to it.
    Last edited: Jun 22, 2012

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