So you're a ten year old boy or girl. In some versions you're a ratty child, and your mother has no problem with you leaving town at with nothing but a creature the size of your leg to protect you. Then you're in a forest with 'worm'-like creatures that shoot 'string' to make you all slow(sticky=slow).
And of course your best friend/worst enemy will take the better pokemon out of spite.
Then once you train your own creature enough, you can poison other people's creatures for fun, burn ****, drown people, or throw leaves at them. Or reflect sun beams. Your choice.
You do this, and sometimes your creatures get hurt and the person there says that they want to see you again after she heals them. You do all this without ever eating or sleeping, and only rarely drinking. And you're ten years old.
And how do you catch new creatures? White balls with a hint of red(sunburns?). You also have to go into multi story caves or walk in tall grass. Like nobody has ever been attacked by real bats or gotten Lyme disease from a tick in that grass. And sometimes you can buy a goldfish for 500 dollars.
Then there's the bad guys. Team Aqua and Team Magma **** up badly and it is up to the ten year old to set them straight. Team 'Rocket', led by a man who has a cat called Persian. Oriental. So the mob's pets are people of the orient? And what do they do? They harvest the tails of Pokemon. Might seem like regular poaching, but pokemon can talk back. That's basicly like when people of the old west scalped Native Americans.
Then old men are like, NO PASSING UNTIL I SHOW YOU THE PROPER USE OF MY SUNBURNT BALLS CAUSE I HAVENT HAD MY COFFEE TODAY!!!!
And sometimes people even lead you into stores, or give your pokemon extra 'abilities' cause you met them behind a tree. No wonder Team Rocket's after you. TM's are like drugs for pokemon and their masters, and you **** up all their drug deals. They set it up and give the money, and you take the delivery no questions asked. In the perfect guise of a 10 year old boy(or girl).
Then of course you go to a casino like all kids over 9 do in that world. Then you see a guy in all black go behind a bookshelf that is conveniently placed so that a person can fit behind it, but that can't be observed from...in front of it...from far away. And you find a set of stairs, so what do you do? You go in the creepy man's basement where you don't move on the floors, the floors move you. Oh I get it. They're Russian Mafia, and the rest of the Orient is their pet. So then you show the mob boss who's boss, and you go up the stairs, and what the hell, I'll pull a slot or two and walk up behind people and steal their coins.
And then the mob hijacks the tallest building in the country...almost 7 floors!!!
And the town you start in has two houses owned by two families and a lab with no beds. It also has a few homeless scientists and some homeless fat people who will give you info on traveling the world, but refuse to go about a quarter of a mile to go beg in a real city.
And if you, a little kid, make eye contact with anyone outside a city, you get in a fight.
And of course your best friend/worst enemy will take the better pokemon out of spite.
Then once you train your own creature enough, you can poison other people's creatures for fun, burn ****, drown people, or throw leaves at them. Or reflect sun beams. Your choice.
You do this, and sometimes your creatures get hurt and the person there says that they want to see you again after she heals them. You do all this without ever eating or sleeping, and only rarely drinking. And you're ten years old.
And how do you catch new creatures? White balls with a hint of red(sunburns?). You also have to go into multi story caves or walk in tall grass. Like nobody has ever been attacked by real bats or gotten Lyme disease from a tick in that grass. And sometimes you can buy a goldfish for 500 dollars.
Then there's the bad guys. Team Aqua and Team Magma **** up badly and it is up to the ten year old to set them straight. Team 'Rocket', led by a man who has a cat called Persian. Oriental. So the mob's pets are people of the orient? And what do they do? They harvest the tails of Pokemon. Might seem like regular poaching, but pokemon can talk back. That's basicly like when people of the old west scalped Native Americans.
Then old men are like, NO PASSING UNTIL I SHOW YOU THE PROPER USE OF MY SUNBURNT BALLS CAUSE I HAVENT HAD MY COFFEE TODAY!!!!
And sometimes people even lead you into stores, or give your pokemon extra 'abilities' cause you met them behind a tree. No wonder Team Rocket's after you. TM's are like drugs for pokemon and their masters, and you **** up all their drug deals. They set it up and give the money, and you take the delivery no questions asked. In the perfect guise of a 10 year old boy(or girl).
Then of course you go to a casino like all kids over 9 do in that world. Then you see a guy in all black go behind a bookshelf that is conveniently placed so that a person can fit behind it, but that can't be observed from...in front of it...from far away. And you find a set of stairs, so what do you do? You go in the creepy man's basement where you don't move on the floors, the floors move you. Oh I get it. They're Russian Mafia, and the rest of the Orient is their pet. So then you show the mob boss who's boss, and you go up the stairs, and what the hell, I'll pull a slot or two and walk up behind people and steal their coins.
And then the mob hijacks the tallest building in the country...almost 7 floors!!!
And the town you start in has two houses owned by two families and a lab with no beds. It also has a few homeless scientists and some homeless fat people who will give you info on traveling the world, but refuse to go about a quarter of a mile to go beg in a real city.
And if you, a little kid, make eye contact with anyone outside a city, you get in a fight.
