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Discussion in 'Fan Fiction' started by canisaries, Jan 12, 2019.

  1. Chibi Pika

    Chibi Pika Stay positive

    Heya, so I know this one has been giving you a lot of grief for awhile, but I found it pretty enjoyable. To start with, I thought the twist with Keith being so overjoyed at the idea of evolving that he evolved into the wrong thing was great, and makes perfect sense. I also liked how you described how his senses changed first before confirming what he'd actually become. The description of how he figured out how to melt into shadow was particularly fun. And Cheri is delightfully obnoxious as always.

    And while the second half of the chapter was a bit uneventful compared to the first half, it did give you time to dig into Keith's emotions. After all, this wasn't a mere setback on his life's goal--this was a real, permanent end to that goal. Of course he'd be devastated. But I'm sure he'll come to realize that he basically played a major role in a dragon revolution, which is pretty damn cool in its own right.

    canisaries likes this.

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